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Thread: Customer Burnout

  1. #1
    kymchoon
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    Post Customer Burnout

    I’m sure this is not likely to be a common complaint, but thought I might seek out some opinions nonetheless…

    I had a big night out on the weekend, went to my local club with some friends (and hit another one briefly at the end of the night with those who were still awake), spent about $1,300 all up and had a really good time. But at the end of the night I came to a horrible realisation – I am thoroughly jaded when it comes to strip clubs. They just don’t hold the interest that they used to anymore.

    I should precede this by saying that it’s not overexposure. I’ll go out to the club at most once a quarter.

    First club we went to (same one we always go to) we had the kind of experience that is most people’s idea of the perfect strip club experience. It’s like “Cheers” in there with naked women, despite the fact that we don’t go in very often. We walked in just after opening, were shown to our ‘regular’ table, sought out our favourite waitress and gave her a big initial tip to take care of us throughout the night (Incidentally guys, I highly recommend this. It means that the quiet old guy on his own ends up being seated on the table next to you instead of the rowdy college guys. That, and if you ask her to grab a particular girl for you and she’s busy, she’ll still remember ¾ of an hour later when said girl finally walks out of VIP). Within about 10mins three of the girls rocked over to say hi and shoot the shit for a while at the start of their shifts (don’t ask me why we’re so well known, we’re not huge spenders– only drop an average of about $200-300 each usually. Some spend less, some more, but that’s what it works out to).

    Over the course of the night we were the table to be at. We got good and friendly service from the waitresses; the dancers were hanging around both because we were spending a lot of money and because if they wanted to take a break they knew that they could hang with us for a while and not have to be ‘on’ – it’s all good. I probably spent a couple of hours getting dances in VIP, but mostly hung out at the table with my mates. It was during those couple of hours (and while getting table dances out in the main area) that it really hit home. I just wasn’t that interested anymore. I took the seat facing away from the stage; when the other guys were getting table dances I shifted my seat so that I could continue my conversation with those who weren’t paying attention either; hell, even out the back in VIP, there just wasn’t that sense of titillation that I remember so fondly from my first couple of years going to the club.

    Don’t get me wrong - I want that. I want to be turned on. Not physically (I can count the number of times that’s happened on my fingers) but at all. I mean I’m sitting there on a comfy chair getting a high quality lap dance from a beautiful, personable girl who I quite like and…nothing (and with the exception of a newbie I didn’t know who I gave a shot, all these girls are good). I appreciated them physically - but in an aesthetic way, I enjoyed the dances – but dispassionately, appreciating the technique.

    This. Sucks.

    The second club I hit with the few left standing at the end of the night. We’d never been there before, but one of SW’s own was dancing there so I decided to head the 50m down the street. In retrospect, we should have gone there earlier, as by the time we got there I had been out (and drinking conservatively but steadily) for the last 10 hours. Lo and behold, I actually had fun. She got the first physical reaction out of me in about 5 years (only for about 30secs, but that’s more than anyone else has managed). Unfortunately I had to leave as I had hit the fatigue point of being really rude and yawning in her face. But even then, as drunk and as tired as I was, I still found myself appreciating (and giving mental kudos for) the way that she played the game (e.g. the timing/smoothness of the ‘time’s up’ pronouncement).

    “Ignorance is bliss” – never a truer thing was said. I got over the whole, “wow, naked women” factor in the first year. I’ve spent so much time hanging out with dancers that I just can’t put myself in that ‘fantasy zone’ anymore.

    I don't wanna be bored with this.

    Help me.

  2. #2
    Featured Member amylynnej's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    It sounds like its the quality of girls youre seeing. No one is paying attention to your needs or finding a way to excite you. What most entertainers fail to do is recognize that all customers are not the same. Most girls sit back and whine because theyre not getting paid what the primadona thinks she should be getting paid instead of taking the time to talk to a customer or get to know him and his friends and see what excites them.

    Maybe changing clubs and taking your business elsewhere will help. get away from the primadonas and hags.
    AmyLynne

  3. #3
    kymchoon
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    It's not that - I've always stayed away from the prima donnas. It's that they used to excite me and no longer do. I've come to be so familiar with them that many of them have been shunted firmly into the 'friend box'. Now, objectively, this is a good thing - but as I said it's gotten to the point where I can't even temporarily suspend the disbelief any more.

    *sigh* I guess maybe changing clubs and seeing some new faces might be the answer. I'm guess I'm just trying to find a reason not to. The thing that bugs me about that option is that at a new club we'll be nobody again, we'll have to work our way up again to all that goodwill and familiarity that we've gained where we are. I've gotten so used to getting the VIP treatment that I'm digging my heels in at the thought of being one of the masses again.

  4. #4
    Veteran Member Yea's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    I agree with Amy, you need a change of scenery that’s all. It could actually be more exciting to be in an unfamiliar place recreating anticipation with new ladies and getting to know new people.


  5. #5
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    I emphathize, but I've found that if I go to clubs with the primary goal of relaxation and some female companionship without complication, I don't suffer any form of disenchantment. Sure, some nights I spend more than others, but that's also largely dependent on the attitude of the girls dancing for me.

    At my regular club, I actually enjoy the comfortable vibe some of the girls give off, since the pretense of the whole dancer/customer facade drops and it's more mellow as a result. I don't waste their time and generally make it worth their while, and they don't feel the need to be "on" next to me. Maybe that's a typical response from a fat, balding, toothlessly slobbering PL like myself, but that's how I feel about it and I never have buyer's remorse as a result.

    Two cents.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  6. #6
    Senior Member amber88's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    Maybe its just coming down to that you're interests are changing. I used to love partying and going to night clubs with my girlfriends. Then I found that it just started getting old. I wanted to get excited and pumped up about going out on the town with the girls...but then I would be in the club and got tired of how I could predict how guys would act. I find now that I like going out to a nice dinner and having wine with the girls. I just lot interest in doing shots and getting crazy on the dance floor.

    Eaither you should change clubs..because old and comfy is not always the most fun..or you might be finding that your entertainment needs will shift over to something else. Hey..by all means I'm not telling you to not visit us dancers in the clubs. But I just wanted to say that change happen...that may be your case.

    Good Luck!

  7. #7
    Featured Member Wwanderer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    Yeah, it is pretty straightforward I think. If you feel like you need a change, why not go ahead and make one. Go to different clubs or do something totally different with your free time. There are a lot of ways to have fun with the sort of money that it takes to be a SC regular. And, if/when you find that you are missing your old club haunts, you can go back just as easily as you took a break. They'll be waiting for you with open arms...so to speak.

    -Ww
    "At this moment what more need we seek?
    As the Truth eternally reveals itself,
    This very place is the Lotus Land of Purity,
    This very body is the Body of the Buddha."
    - Zazen Wasan

  8. #8
    Veteran Member merely_lurking's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    I feel the same way as you do, I used to really enjoy stripclubs but can't really get into them the way I used to. I think I was going to clubs more often than you, probably 3-4 times a month. I still go every once in awhile, but I don't find my interest really returning. I felt the same way in that I didn't want that feeling of excitement to go away, but it has, and I just have looked for other interests to fill that void, and don't miss the strip-clubbing that much anymore.
    A fat chick is like a big, warm, comfortable pillow that you can also have sex with....

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    I guess it all depends on what you are looking for. I don't go with a bunch of guys, though I do sometimes meet a friend or two their if we are both going gto be working in the area. I do buy dances but often it's not for titilation rather than as a means of patronizing my favs. It's fun, I relax and, for a few hours, forget about the crap that I have to deal with in the real world. I'm not looking for every visit to be an "experience". I just go to chill and enjoy some no-strings-attached female companionship.
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  10. #10
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    Depends what you want out of the experience. I suspect when any bloke goes into a strip venue they get a kick out of it for the first few time. Unlimited and very attractive naked women on view - hell, yeah!!!

    Some men never seem to shake this feeling of wonderment off. You can go back to the place at random times and on different days, and you'll see the same faces there, staring away.

    It's also possible to become "desensitised" to the eroticism of it. If you regularly see nudity, then some of its shock value goes. Striptease has become very mainstream, and has lost some of its novelty as a consequence.

    Yet another factor is getting to know a dancer's true motivations - I suspect the blokes that never lose the sense of wonderment about seeing dancers buy into the "stripper stereotype" and remain convinced that the dancers are in the throes of erotic excitement because they are nude in front of strangers. If you come to understand otherwise, then this takes away some of the eroticism from a dancer's performance.

    Something I've noticed clearly, is that when you form a real friendship with a dancer, they tend to, (consciously or otherwise), stop putting on an erotic performance for your benefit. She'll continue to do the "tease" for every other guy in the place, because he's a potential paying customer. Because you've become a friend the dancer will:

    (a) stop viewing you as a potential source of revenue and
    (b) possibly become mildly self conscious - it's different being nude in front of a stranger and someone you know well.

    Both of these factors substantially change the stimuli you get from seeing that particular dancer work. You can even get to a situation where both you and the dancer tacitly ignore the fact that she's nude.

    On a personal level I'll always enjoy seeing an attractive woman naked - it's a very pleasing sight - but continued exposure to nudity and growing knowledge of a dancers underlying motivations has reduced the erotic effect of seeing a dancer at work.

    Phil W.

  11. #11
    God/dess gypsy_girlchild's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    What are you talking about Phil? Of course we all have orgasms just giving a lap dance... he he
    It is a bummer when customers and dancers alike become desensitized, I don't thin that word ever has a use for it.
    I always recommend a different club for dancers or a little time off, as for customers it would be slitting our own throat to recommend a different club or time off. I would say come in on different nights or with different people. That makes it feel like a different experience.
    Please don't lick me, it tickles..



  12. #12
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    Quote Originally Posted by gypsy_girlchild
    What are you talking about Phil? Of course we all have orgasms just giving a lap dance... he he
    It is a bummer when customers and dancers alike become desensitized, I don't thin that word ever has a use for it.
    I always recommend a different club for dancers or a little time off, as for customers it would be slitting our own throat to recommend a different club or time off. I would say come in on different nights or with different people. That makes it feel like a different experience.
    Horses for courses - I'm happy pottering into a strip venue and just chatting to the specific dancer(s) I have gone to meet, and they want me there mainly as a friend, not as a customer. It's an arrangement that suits both me and them, (and extends outside of work). Different nights or different people are not going to "resensitise" me - the motivations that take me into a strip venue are different from most.

    Conversely there are customers who will never be "desensitised" to striptease. There's a guy who posts a weekly report on a UK stripping related chat group, and who seems to average 5 - 6 days a week visit to strip venues. Judging from the report he spends this amount of time watching dancers because of the erotic stimuli he gets from it.

    You're always going to get a wide mix of customers and motivations within a strip venue. Some will be once in a while visitors, some come in several days a week. Some will regard it as "for real", others just enjoy an unusual and slightly risque form of entertainment. Some will get a real erotic charge from watching the dancers, some just enjoy the view.

    There's always going to be a turnover of customers. Some will be making their first forays into "strip land", wide eyed with wonder; others may have developed different motivations, or become more cynical about striptease. The more cynical move on to pastures new, to be replaced by the wide eyed newbies.

    I'd be very surprised if there was not a correlation between increasing exposure to nudity and underlying motivations, and the resulting "desensitisation."

    (You could say the same about dancers. How long does an average girl stay in the business - my guess would be 3 - 4 years).

    Phil W.

  13. #13
    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    I think it was Lilith (or maybe Bridgette) who talked about customer shelf life. In that same context, strippers, and the whole club scene for that matter, have a shelf life with many customers. Ive know quite a few junkies (myself included) who have taken a break from clubbing. The reasons are many but the most common Ive heard are:

    Spending way too much money (SC's rival casinos in emptying your pockets in record time)

    Finding yourself developing urealistic expectations (I know she really likes me)

    Suspicious wife or SO (should have dropped the clothes directly into the washing machine and taken a quick shower)

    Strip clubs can be the ultimate forbidden (and thus most exciting) fruit out there but as with most fun stuff, there is a price. Burn out can be one of them. The upside is, most guys over time get reinvigorated and go back at it. I know I did after my 9 month hiatus

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  14. #14
    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    Strip clubs are like any other vice. Nothing ever quite feels like doing them for the first time. After 10 years, I know that I'm never going to feel the anticipation about going that I felt when I first began going to clubs. I simply have too much frame of reference now on what to expect. The unexpected is what tends to make it fun.

    When the trips are becoming too clinical, or too unsatisfying for the money that you're spending, its perhaps time to take a hiatus, and for as long as you need, even if its permanent.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

  15. #15
    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Customer Burnout

    Doc nailed probably the most common one of all...simply losing interest with the familiar. Hard to imagine T&A becoming mundane but it does apparently. Maybe someone should start a new thread "How To Spice Up Your Strip Club Experience"

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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