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Thread: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

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    Member Petals's Avatar
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    Default good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    So I auditioned today, and then they had me start right afterward. Dancing on stage was fun (though I definetely need to build a repertoir of moves so I don't bore everyone!) and selling/giving laps went much better than I expected (I give SW full credit . . . I kept remembering tips that I got from here) . The thing is, the first part of the shift was slow, and I was one of the few making any money . . . probably the most, and the girls were, well, not exactly bitchy, but pretty close. They all seemed to be close and they hang out outside the club, and most of them pretty much just ignored me, even when I smiled or tried to talk. And during my second stage set there were about five girls sitting pretty close and just staring at me (also there were only about 4 customers at that point, so it was hard not to notice them). Now if I were an experienced dancer and I watched a girl out-earn me on her first day I prolly wouldn't love her either, but I also wouldn't sit around gossiping while she worked the floor. I wanted to say, 'sorry for making money, but I think that's what happens when you WORK.' So anyway, I guess I'm just wondering if this is a pretty typical first-day type thing that girls do at clique-ey clubs, and can I expect it to get better if I continue to be nice but hardworking? I wish I could say I don't care what they think of me, and I mostly don't, but it makes it pretty awkward in the dressing room when nobody will say anything to me . Thanks everyone! ~Petals

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    They're just jealous because you made money. In those small clubs they never like a new girl coming in and taking "their" money Best thing you can do is completely ignore them, I mean act like they don't even exist, and keep right on doing your thing and making money!

    Congrats on a good first day!

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    God/dess blondhottie's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Sounds like you did pretty well. Bridgette is right-don't worry about the other girls. You're there to make money, not friends. Just keep doing your thing!

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    Featured Member tampadancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    part of it is probably them "sizing you up." It's not unusual for dancers to be cold to new girls at first. They'll probably warm up to you in time; if not, screw em! Make your money, don't worry about them. Good luck and keep up the good work!

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    Veteran Member Blueyez's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette
    They're just jealous because you made money. In those small clubs they never like a new girl coming in and taking "their" money Best thing you can do is completely ignore them, I mean act like they don't even exist, and keep right on doing your thing and making money!

    Congrats on a good first day!
    That was pretty much my experience on my first day as well. I just told msyelf that I was there to make the customers happy, not the other girls. I'm still not real close to most of the other girls, and I've been there almost 4 months. *shrug*
    Never underestimate a hot chick with brains - even if she's nekkid!

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    Featured Member LilSweetVixen's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    they're stupid. it's not like you were snatching up people they were working on, they weren't even working!! they're mad that you're new and that the new face attracted more people. oh well, the good thing is you had more time to make money and less time to chat it up with dancers.

    "You have demonic genius" -Naomi Wolf
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Thats the way some dancers are. Some really dont care, because they are a hustler, they work, and they know you probably wont have an effect on their money. Others, however, are the ones that sit around and just get cash -handed- to them, and then when the other men see that there is a new girl willing to work and -earn- her money, they would rather have you, not them. I say ignore em, heh!

  8. #8
    Pamela
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette
    They're just jealous because you made money. In those small clubs they never like a new girl coming in and taking "their" money Best thing you can do is completely ignore them, I mean act like they don't even exist, and keep right on doing your thing and making money!

    Congrats on a good first day!
    That is the best advice! Sooner or later a newbie will come along (after you) and she will get the same treatment if she sells or not. ALOT of dancers are catty. I did not put myself along side them, because i would have said hello to you, and not talked shit about you...i DID not EVER get along with other dancers in clubs, by choice. It's about the $$$$, screw the dancers. Now after i quit dancing...Sure i will speak and be friends. Not while working, no way. Dancing IS all about making money, and the best gets the most money!!! They were nothing but competetion..learn great hustling, and kill themwith kindness. Meaning smile and walk on by!!!!!

    AND..If these "girls" start off with gossip etc. You don't want to see what the future would hold if you became friends....Trust me, they will be jealous, and "haters." All the signs are already there.

    You are there to work, and keep doing it. Bank! Screw them. They don't matter, remember that, and they are NOT going to make you money.

    PS never tell or show how much money you make...EVER.

    Pamela

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    Veteran Member Sapphire's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    I agree with what everyone else is saying. You are there to make money. If they have a problem with it, well screw them. I have found I work better when I don't speak to the dancers. If I get to close to them (making friends with them), then I start socializing instead of working...which is kinda bad for the earnings. IMO.

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    Member Petals's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Thanks so much everyone . . . I thought that's what y'all would say, I just needed to hear it from people who know! Ok, so screw 'em; now that I've decided to be totally over them I'm excited about work on Sun.! ~Petals

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    Featured Member showgirlschloe's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Good job on making good money. The girls will warm up to you. At first, we're all a little apprehensive of the new girl. I try to be nice and say hi whenever I see a new girl, but we get so many that start and never come back that it's a waste of time to be overly nice. Hang in there, make your money and the friends will come later.

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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Go read the post written by the dancer that had one of the regular girls put a cigarette out in her drink!

    This happens everywhere, and it's mostly due to jealousy over money. There is also a 'hazing' or 'acceptance trial' period with almost any social group: it is a generally little worse with guys, but dancers in some clubs seem to be just as bad with new girls. I worked in one club that had a well-deserved reputation for this, and the guys were cliquish too--it was the worst club I ever worked in.

    Try to find one or two of them who is cooler to hang out with, if this bothers you, she will then put in a word for you with the others "Don't mess with her, she's cool...", and warn you who isn't worth being patient with. There's always a few who are just bitches, and should just be treated accordingly.

    On the other hand some clubs aren't worth worrying about--just go to work, make your money, and look for friends elsewhere.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Pamela summed it up (as always)
    Just don't let ANYONE get you down, it's pointless and remember it is JUST a job so why would you care if your co-workers like you or not?
    If they're mean, avoid them, but don't give them any fuel to hate you ie. telling how much you made, or about your life.
    Dancing is all about choices, you choose how everyone views you so you can be anyone or anything you want... Don't be a bitch, but don't try to win them over, they aren't going to pay you for it.
    Enjoy
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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Don't waste a millisecond of your time on the girls at work hun. Just go and make your money. If you need to talk to other girls about something, come here, that's what we're here for!

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    I was terrified of the girl the first time I danced, and I had even waitressed at another club before. I was trying to find a place to sit by the mirror to do makeup but everytime I tried to sit, a girl in the adjacent seat would pull the chair from me and bark that it was reserved.

    I did my makeup on the floor. Now, when I go to a new club I do all of my hair and makeup and home, ignore everyone, and take ZERO SHIT FROM ANYONE.

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    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    I prefer that no one talks to me in the dressing room actually,unless they are friends with me.I just wanna make my money and get the f*ck out.
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Congrats on the first day.. and B is right on this one... I think someone has this as a saying on their avatar and I've heard it before "Comfort the disturbed, disturb the comfortable"- lots of knowledge in that statement.

    Personally, I never gave a rats ass what anyone thought of me. I wasn't dancing to make friends, I was dancing to make money and if I made a friend a long the way then great, but I kept my nose out of shit, did my own thing and stayed to myself. I prefer working like that.

    Don't worry, keep making money and you'll be fine!


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    Veteran Member siliconedoll's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    I know its the obvious thing to say that u should just keep your head down and get on with dancing but im worried its not going to be so easy. Im pretty easily intimidated (although i try not to show it) and the thought of being in a dressing room with a bunch of gossipy nasty girls is rather terrifying. You dont want it to get physical and even if it doesnt its bad enough knowing people are making catty remarks. I guess im gonna need to toughen up cos even though i shouldnt give a damn the truth is deep down I do.

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    Veteran Member Heaven777's Avatar
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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    I'm with you siliconedoll, I'm afraid of the catty mean girls too. So , when I start dancing I think I'll just try to be pleasant AND distant. They can't fire at you if they don't have any ammo. And remember, you don't NEED those girls for friends. If you need somebody to talk to just hop on here!!! We will be your friends!!! ( we don't care if you make more money than us, wear an outfit that's weird, or whatever the other girls talk about)

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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    I'm not looking forward to working with catty girls but I've worked in offices with catty girls (one who even tried purposefully to get me fired) and I grew up going to a really snobby school full of straight up BITCHES so I've learned to do my own thing. Just keep your chin up and remember that people are usually mean and catty because they are JEALOUS!

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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine
    I did my makeup on the floor. Now, when I go to a new club I do all of my hair and makeup and home, ignore everyone, and take ZERO SHIT FROM ANYONE.
    LOL, That's exactly what I do. I like to do my hair and makeup at home so that when I get to work, all I have to do is change into my outfit and then go out onto the floor. I spend as little time in the dressing room as possible. One club I used to work at opened at 5 pm, yet everyone was required to be there at 3:45 pm. I didn't like that rule because I like to get ready at home while listening to my favorite music-it sounds kinda stupid but it relaxes me and puts me in the right mindset for work.

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    Default Re: good first day, but the girls were pretty cold.

    Congratulations on the job!You'll see a lot more cattiness as you keep working,and in fact it's normal,that's just the nature of some women,but also a big part of the business.It's only been one day for you,so for the next 2-3 weeks you'll have to just suck it in and live through it.After that they will start melting and start talking to you,don't worry,it will happen.But whatever you do,stay out of the drama,that's the worst thing to get mixed up in.Just remember,that it's only a job and you're there for one reason only....to make money.

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