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Thread: I don’t want to be her regular anymore...

  1. #26
    Moderator yoda57us's Avatar
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    Default Re: I don’t want to be her regular anymore...

    This entire thread is the reason I refuse to limit myself to one dancer in any one club. No matter how much a particular dancer "does it" for you, you can always find at least one or two others in the same club who will to and, to me, this is essential for maintaining your sanity and avoiding RILdom. I still have favs, and I even have an ATF-but she's been retired for two years and, the way I approach my SC activities these days I doubt she'll ever be replaced.

    As long as a customer/dancer relationship feels like fun it's cool. When it starts to feel like a an obligation or in any other way just kind of "wierd", then it's time to re-think.
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  2. #27
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    Default Re: I don’t want to be her regular anymore...

    Dude, just drop her cold turkey!

  3. #28
    Veteran Member Santos's Avatar
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    Default Re: I don’t want to be her regular anymore...

    Quote Originally Posted by WrenStar
    Interesting point ML. I did say my relationship with her is some sort of mix between friendship and business, and I realize it can never ever go further than that. I may be getting way into her and I’m not comfortable with it. So, I react by saying, “I don’t want to be her regular anymore.”

    I really should talk to her about it.
    If you feel you're spending too much money and time; or if you feel your SC activities are unhealthy in anyway, you should tell here exactly that, and work towards changing your behavior. If money isn’t an issue and you enjoy the time with her and you don't feel your activities are hurting you in any way, then there isn't a problem. If you're bored and interested in new dancers, you should tell her, and then move on.



    If you can't control your spending at the club etc., you should probably seek some help.



    If you have feelings for her, you should tell her and get it out in the open. IMO, there is no point in continuing to live in the limbo fantasy world with a pseudo girlfriend if you really do care for her. Better to see what her reaction is and reap the rewards or deal with the pain of rejection, and then move forward.



    Personally, I’m not a “regular” kind of customer, but I must say your dancer friend sounds very cool. If I were in your shoes, I would also want to do the respectful thing.



    Good luck with whatever you decide to do

    .

  4. #29
    Featured Member FONDL's Avatar
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    Default Re: I don’t want to be her regular anymore...

    If you're becoming uncomfortable with the relationship, try seeing her a little less often and maybe hitting another club now and then. I'm currently a regular with a girl who I really like partly because she treats me better than any dancer ever has before. I make it a point not to see her too often. I think that makes it better all around, we appreciate each other a lot more that way, I don't become a part of her regular income, and there's no drama. I think our relationship is nearly perfect just the way it is and I'd be delighted to see it last 4 or more years. As far as your comment that your relationship isn't going anywhere, what's wrong with that? Sounds to me like it's already right about where it ought to be. I don't see any reason to end it as long as you aren't obsessed with her and you can afford it. Sounds to me like you have what a lot of us guys are looking for. Enjoy it.
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  5. #30
    Veteran Member nychaos99's Avatar
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    Default Re: I don’t want to be her regular anymore...

    Wow - that is the most wonderful letter I've ever read- you are an amazing person- she is lucky to have you, and you are lucky to have her. So, why end a good thing? If you're ok with it, then there isn't a reason to stop seeing her. You are a fantastic customer/friend-
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  6. #31
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    Default Re: I don’t want to be her regular anymore...

    Quote Originally Posted by nychaos99
    Wow - that is the most wonderful letter I've ever read- you are an amazing person- she is lucky to have you, and you are lucky to have her. So, why end a good thing? If you're ok with it, then there isn't a reason to stop seeing her. You are a fantastic customer/friend-
    NYChaos, thank you for the kind words. You’re so sweet. Well, I just paid my ATF a visit the other day, and once again I had another hot, amazing time. It would be difficult for me to stop visiting her any time soon.

    Why give it more thought? Why question the relationship? Why cause drama? Why end a good thing? Well folks, I’m in for the long haul, and I’m probably going to be her regular to the very end of her career!
    Last edited by WrenStar; 03-06-2005 at 10:42 PM.

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