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Thread: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

  1. #1
    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    Yep. It was a full moon this week; could you tell? I always know it when I realize I am having conversations that make no sense at all. These are things tha happened to me this week:

    1) a customer is in my first club Monday and talks my ear off for at least 40 minutes about his big improtant job and all the money he makes, then wehn he finally shuts up long enough for me to ask for a dance, he races out the door. He later turns up later in the weel in my other club, claims it is a COINCIDENCE (I did tell him where I work), and bought one--count 'em--ONE $10 dance, during which he had to tell me about his extensive collection of expensive cars. ANother dance, sweetie? No, he does not have any money!!

    2) A customer comes into the club and attempts to LICK all the dancers. THen he can't understand why nobody wants anythig to do with him!

    3) guy attempts to put his arm across my thorat and hold my head in place so he can stick his tongue in my ear

    4) different guy BITES my ear

    5) guy attempts to suck on my nipples

    6) various guys trying to find (or make) a hole in my pantyhose (I have to wear them at the lap dance shows in regular bars)

    7) idiot attempting to palpate my spine via my navel

    several customers making obscene tongue gestures at me whiel I am dancing for them

    9) several customers asking if I am PREGNANT! WTF! :

    10) guy spends about 20 minures asking me all kinds of personal sexual questions, the thells me he does not like white chicks anyway

    ANd the #1 wierd thing that happened to me this week:

    A guy pulls out a vibrator and tries to use it on me!

    And it is only Friday! I winder what the we4ekend will hold!
    Last edited by colleen; 02-25-2005 at 10:02 AM. Reason: Mistake

  2. #2
    Senior Member DesireTime's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    LOL, I grew up in the area I think you work in Colleen (NW Ind/South Chicago) and I've always sworn there's something in the tap water there
    And you hunger for the time,
    Time to heal, desire time.
    And your earth moves beneath
    your own dream landscape...

    U2, "A Sort of Homecoming"

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    Member LovelyLaura's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    lol we used to swear all the freaks would come out when there was a full moon.....

    #3 I would have kicked him so hard with my six inch spike for that kind of crap!!

    What is it with the biting?? Do they actually think its romantic, and think that we love to walk around the rest of the night with a huge bite mark on our neck?? WTF?

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    Featured Member showgirlschloe's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    What a weird week you've had. I'm glad I decided to take this week off.

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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    This is exactly the reason I stopped dancing, HEH! I swear, one more guy would have tried to do any of the above to me, I would have probably done something to get me in a world of trouble.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    Fuckit, I ain't gonna work this weekend, sounds awful, hope things improve

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    Girl, I just had this convo with one of my regulars today...about the full moon and people acting SO odd in the club all week.....

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    Banned Madcap's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    Okay, i can't resist...

    Who the fuck carries a VIBRATOR around?? Jesus, that is lame.

    Carry on, sorry to intrude but that was too much. What a freak.

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    Member MistressJennaIL's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    Desire time, being familair with the Chitown scene, I can honestly say that the "somethimg in the water" out south is coke...in my experience, it's always snowing on the south side LOL seriously though, where ar eyour bouncers/floormen when this shit happens? I have a low threshold for violence, but if some dude pulls out a vibe on me...I'm paying to have him stomped into a coma...just my .02

  10. #10
    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    Oh, I forgot to mention they guy who offered me $300 to suck my toes (because he has SOOOOOO much money!), then tried bum a cigarette and talk me into a half-price lap dance!

    Actaully the guy with the vibe was in a show I picked up for a differnt agency. It is known to be rough, sort of a free-for-all, but I thought I would give it a try . . . I was prepared for groping and grabbing and the like, but a VIBE??? I am still wondering what the hell he was thinking!

    Seriouly, I always know when it is a full moon, even if I did not see the moon myself, because of the way the customers act. Even wehn I worked at Radio Shack, whenever a customer came in with an amazingly stupid question or a bizarre request,I knew it was that time of month!

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    Featured Member evan_essence's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    Quote Originally Posted by colleen
    1) a customer is in my first club Monday and talks my ear off for at least 40 minutes about his big improtant job and all the money he makes, then wehn he finally shuts up long enough for me to ask for a dance, he races out the door. ...

    10) guy spends about 20 minures asking me all kinds of personal sexual questions, the thells me he does not like white chicks anyway
    20 and 40 minutes? Are you sure the customer was the only one under the influence of the full moon? Looney is the word that comes to my mind to describe the behavior of spending that much time with a customer before suggesting a dance or hazardous duty (aka sympathetic listener) pay. Try cutting that time period down to about 1/5th of that.

    -Ev

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    Senior Member PoisonKandi's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    LMAO I hope you make it thru the weekend!

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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    Quote Originally Posted by Madcap
    Okay, i can't resist...

    Who the fuck carries a VIBRATOR around?? Jesus, that is lame.

    Carry on, sorry to intrude but that was too much. What a freak.
    One club that I worked at, did covered friction dances where most of the dance was grinding....one guy came in and got a dance from me. He had one of those silver bullet vibes deep in his pocket, he was nice about it and told me before the dance so it didn't freak me out! It did feel pretty good!! I've seen some weird shit, dancing....

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    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Maybe all my customers are actaully wierwolves?

    Quote Originally Posted by evan_essence
    20 and 40 minutes? Are you sure the customer was the only one under the influence of the full moon? Looney is the word that comes to my mind to describe the behavior of spending that much time with a customer before suggesting a dance or hazardous duty (aka sympathetic listener) pay. Try cutting that time period down to about 1/5th of that.

    -Ev
    Typical at the low-hustle, low class club where I work. This is going to be my last week. I am tired of dancing for charity!

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