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Thread: going out with customers

  1. #26
    Member Nikki Lee's Avatar
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    Default Re: going out with customers

    MY other half and i have become very good friends with one of my customers. He's kinda like a big brother since he's older than both of us. Him and his dad own their own business, and are planning on sponsoring my bf's racecar. he comes into the club a few times a week. spends pretty much money on me, and the finny thing is, he wont look at me nekkid.
    Yes, it's Fast. No, you can't ride!

  2. #27
    Newbie Alexandra19's Avatar
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    Default Re: going out with customers

    Quote Originally Posted by onlythebest
    Last time I checked,friends don't spend money on you like that.
    Quote for truth.

    Anyway, let your own ethics guide you. If all you want from him is his money, then by all means tell him this before shit gets any worse. Sure you could play his feelings while you milk whataver he's worth out of him. But keep in mind, chances are he doesn't have a lot of money anyway, and that *insert trinket* he bought you could be coming straight out of his sons college fund.

    If you don't want anything but his money, by all means let him know. In fact I'm fairly angry at a lot of women for creating the whole "gold digging cold-hearted bitch" stereotype. Not ever guy out there is smart enough to see things for what they are, or keep his wallet in his pocket around some random stripper he just met.

    One of my friends did this, with some middle-aged tax atterney. He himself had very little money, but he threw all of it at her every chance he got, and of course got bitter and angry when he got nothing in return. She finally told him the truth, he faced the facts, and from what I've heard has found a nice lady his own age, and wrote back to tell my friend that she actually HELPED him be happy in life (through realizing that clubs are only an illusion, waste of money and true love and happiness don't come out of the ATM machine)

  3. #28
    Senior Member Malak's Avatar
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    Default Re: going out with customers

    If it's against the dancers principles not to do it then by all means don't.

    But one aspect to all this which has not been mentioned is that it gives
    guys a chance to "audition" for a real date/relationship. Yes, the guy may
    get his feelings hurt but that's his decision whether it is worth it. For myself,
    it is well worth it. I woke up at 2AM this morning with Van Halen's "That's
    What Dreams are Made of" cranking in my head. Those are the emotions I
    live for and they confirm my humanity. :-D
    Beauty is in the eye of the beer-holder.

  4. #29
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    Default Re: going out with customers

    If the guys is spending so much money, I think he feels insecure and thinks that he has to "buy" you...perhaps its just a way of dealing with his insecurities. To really have a friendship, you need open communication. Let him know that he doesn't have to spend money on you like that, that you like his company. If he sees you at the club, change your boundaries, don't be overtly sexual with him, but rather friendly....if he buys dances from you, don't be overtly sensual but rather just cute and fun....The key is just sincerity...

  5. #30
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    Default Re: going out with customers

    Quote Originally Posted by Meea
    Ok, so I finally took that step where me and my customer see each other outside of work. There is no sex, love, or relationship talk, and he is very polite in that respect.

    So we've already been shopping, and he spent way too much money, which made me uncomfortable..
    Been friendly for several years with several dancers OTC, but it's exactly that, a friendship. We see each other cos we like each other - end of story. We'd have been friends wherever we met.

    Read a number of posts over time on this site about dancer's who've got sugar daddies. Both sides seem to enjoy it - the dancer has an income and the sugar daddy obviously like providing for his "pet" dancer. Again, both sides seem to have reached a tacit agreement on their relationship.

    Your problem is going to be if this custy sees his spending as an "investment" towards a future deepening of the relationship. Happened to a dancer friend of mine - the custy tried to get a "return" on his spending and got quite nasty when he was told "sorry, but no".

    Guess you need to make sure both you and your custy know the ground rules and will stick to them. I'd have to say though, if you want this guy as a genuine friend, you'll need to stop him spending excessive amounts of money on you. If you let him keep on doing it, he'll eventually feel he's being used.

    So do you want a friend, sugar daddy, or customer who'll spend money on you OTC? I guess you need to be clear in your own mind what you want and act accordingly. Make sure that your custy clearly understands the rules as well - nothing worse than mismatch of expectations.

    Phil.

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