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Thread: Confused

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    Default Confused

    I hope I am posting this in the right section.

    I went to a SC for the first time last week and didn't really know what to expect. I received dances from a few of the girls and I really enjoyed them. I tried to be well behaved (no touching at all). One dancer sat and talked for awhile before ever asking if I wanted a dance. She asked if I had a wife and I said yes and that was it on that subject. My wife and I are having problems and that is how I ended up at the club in the first place but I never mentioned that.

    During the dance she kissed me on the lips and guided my hands to places that I assumed were off limits. I know there is no way any of you could know what she was thinking but was this part of the illusion or could it be something more?

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    Featured Member LilSweetVixen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confused

    You "tried" to behave yourself? Hmm...

    Anyhow, it sounds like this girl was just doing very poorly that night and had to resort to a longer stay with one person coupled with extras. Even if it were something more, what difference would that make to an established, married man? If it were something more, she would have said "call me" which still wouldn't make a difference to you right? You were there to have guilt-free fun, it was a fiasco and now the club and one person in it has infected your mind.

    "You have demonic genius" -Naomi Wolf
    "I very much resent it when people - maybe with good intentions or from a progressive point of view - keep telling me, 'It's their culture' ... It's like saying the culture of Massachusetts is burning witches." -Azar Nafisi


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    Veteran Member afxturnip's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confused

    Hey,

    I (and probably lots of others whether they will admit it or not) have been in the same situation, notably when very new to the SC scene. While I won't say it's 100% certain (hey! beneath this crusty cynicism is a foolish romantic), it is 99% likely that she was cultivating future business. She obviously got your attention, and you had a great time. Enjoy it, keep being the well-behaved customer, and have more good times if you so desire.

    -afx

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    Veteran Member afxturnip's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confused

    Lilsweet vixen may be right too!

    BTW, I know that's not you, but that's still a very comely avatar.

    -afx

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    Default Re: Confused

    This just goes to show that men lack control over the part of the brain that is supposed to tell them they are doing something wrong. You are married. And you let a dancer guide your hands over places that were off limits? Lets just say that if I were your wife and found out about this, your clothes would be all over the front lawn, if not worse.

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    Default Re: Confused

    Also, this is the reason my husband does not visit sc's anymore without me. I know the majority of strippers out there are in it for the money, I was one of them. But the ones who pull this extra shit make me want to kick their ass, because they dont realize that they could be screwing up relationships. Bitches. By the way, did you try to stop her from kissing you, or did you find your balls and say hey, Im married?

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    Default Re: Confused

    I thought I might see some posts like the one from RetiredDancer. I do know the difference between right and wrong. When I said that my wife and I were having problems it was a nice way of saying we are getting divorced. I did not mention that to the dancer b/c I thought it might sound like a line.

    After reading the replies so far, I am thinking that the dancer was just good at getting me to spend money. I did have a good time at the club and will more than likely return.

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    Default Re: Confused

    Well why didnt you say you were getting divorced? It still doesnt make a difference IMO, if you are still legally married and you kissed another woman, or let her kiss you, its not very honest. At any rate, she was probably just trying to get more $ out of you.

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    Default Re: Confused

    Thanks for your thoughts, Retired Dancer. I am sorry that my leaving that info out got you riled up, but I understand why. I probably knew there was nothing there. just needed others to knock some sense in to me.

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    Default Re: Confused

    A few sc's I went to in vegas let u touch - the ones here do not......

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    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confused

    I see exotic dancing and prostitution as outside the realm of cheating on ones spouse. *Usually* there is no emotional connection between provider and customer, and it is merely an entertainment service.

    This customer wanted to know if the dancer he purcased dances from was doing what was typical or if he got special treatment. I say Keefer35 definately got special treatment, but within the realm of business. And maybe she was not the only one who would behave that way at her club- some clubs are known for being a little more touchly feely then others.

    I hope you enjoyed yourself, Keefer35, and I hope you plan to go back again when you need to escape from the pressures of daily life.

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    Default Re: Confused

    I must be working at completely different sc's if kissing is within the realm of business. If I knew a stripper tried/did kiss my husband, I would kick her ass. I imagine it wouldnt sit well with other married women here knowing their husband was kissed when he was getting ld's.

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    Default Re: Confused

    I agree with Paris in her reasoning sc are not a place for a relationship to be had . Its for the fantasy at least thats what I use this kind of entertainment for .If your wife is the real jelous type either dont go to one with or without her or dont tell her you went !! It works for me

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    Default Re: Confused

    What do you girls think of kissing on the show floor at a table?

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    Featured Member polecat's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confused

    To not get into the politics whether or not this is 'normal' in the realm of stripclubs, one thing I can assert is that this behavior is likely 'normal' for the dancer in question.

    Basically, figure she's kissed probably 10-20 guys before you.. and likely does so on a regular and nightly basis. The fact she queried if you were married (what, do you leave your ring at home?) seals this for me- savvy extra-boundries women working in seedier stripclubs take a married man by himself in there looking for something he's not getting at home, and thus pour it on thick in hopes of landing a repeat customer.

    While I cannot under any circumstances condone "cheating" (whatever your personal evaluation for this may be), I can now understand a neglectful or unattentive wife making guys have the desire to seek their needs elsewhere. Obviously, this dancer could sense that and tried to provide that need. On a more ethical front, you should either: a) fix what's wrong with the primary relationship, b) declare your activities to your wife (scary thought if you live in a pro-wife divorce state), c) End the relationship, or d) assume continued unhappiness. If you are still kissing or even having sex with your wife (even if this has been reduced to once in a blue moon), it's a travesty to expose her to HSV, Hep or other things that you may contract from this stripper. And yes, you CAN get these (and other) diseases simply from kissing someone... heaven forbid you two take things to another level next visit.
    It doesn't matter if you're somebody in this world, it rather matters you mean the whole world to somebody.

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    Default Re: Confused

    Quote Originally Posted by cosis
    What do you girls think of kissing on the show floor at a table?
    Why would you want to kiss a dancer anyway? If she kisses you she will kiss anything, lips,dick,ass, etc. Come one figure out what a strip club is all about and enjoy it!
    "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy."

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    Default Re: Confused

    No kidding! ^^

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    Default Re: Confused

    I go for the fingernails, and bite away

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    Default Re: Confused

    Well, you obviously enjoyed yourself. Instead of asking on here if she's interested, go and ask her yourself... You never, she might be interested and stranger things HAVE happened.
    Please don't lick me, it tickles..



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    Featured Member bambiblue's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confused

    I am afraid you are mistaken.... you didn't get a lap dance from a dancer .... you got one from a prostitute. At least that is my opinion of this "girl". Considering this was your first encounter with this girl, doesn't it strike you as strange that she kissed you on the mouth and let you fondle her? I guarantee she does it to everyone else that walks into that club. Pretty sick if you ask me. Strip clubs are sopposed to be about fantasy..... but what you two did crossed that line. Its whores like that that give the rest of us a bad name and make it harder and harder for girls to make money without selling ther souls to do it.

  21. #21
    tampafldancer
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    Default Re: Confused

    Quote Originally Posted by bambiblue
    Its whores like that that give the rest of us a bad name and make it harder and harder for girls to make money without selling ther souls to do it.

    amen to that.

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    Banned All Good Things's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confused

    Quote Originally Posted by big_daddy
    Why would you want to kiss a dancer anyway?
    Let me count the ways.

    1. Because she's beautiful.
    2. Because she's sexy, and funny, and tells great jokes.
    3. Because she shares her life with me in many different ways, both in the club and OTC.
    4. Because we've learned to trust each other in ways that are both surprising and borderline insane.
    5. Because she leads, and she is the one who leans over and kisses me on the mouth.

    I am really surprised by the concern with kissing on the mouth. In my experience, it is incredibly common if you are a good regular; so common that I would be surprised if it didn't happen. The dancer "guided his hands to regions he thought were off limits" and the concern is with kissing? Wow.

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    Featured Member LilSweetVixen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confused

    Quote Originally Posted by bambiblue
    Its whores like that that give the rest of us a bad name and make it harder and harder for girls to make money without selling ther souls to do it.
    sell their souls? oh come now. this is the same stuff "wifey" types are spewing about strippers. it's girls like us that make it harder for them to keep their husbands without having to turn it up a notch.

    but I agree that strip clubs are about fantasy and fun not spreading diseases.

    "You have demonic genius" -Naomi Wolf
    "I very much resent it when people - maybe with good intentions or from a progressive point of view - keep telling me, 'It's their culture' ... It's like saying the culture of Massachusetts is burning witches." -Azar Nafisi


  24. #24
    Featured Member red red red's Avatar
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    Default Re: Confused

    Quote Originally Posted by bambiblue
    I am afraid you are mistaken.... you didn't get a lap dance from a dancer .... you got one from a prostitute. At least that is my opinion of this "girl"... Its whores like that that give the rest of us a bad name and make it harder and harder for girls to make money without selling ther souls to do it.
    Even Rush Limbaugh wouldn't be that conservative on this topic.

    Women strip for lots of different reasons. Most of them are in it for the money, but there's always going to be your "cheap thrill" girl, or your "reallllly drunk girl," or your "damn, I'm pissed at my boyfriend" girl. The dancer in question could have had any number of motives for doing what she did, but I'm sure it had nothing to do with "selling [her] soul."

    No one will ever really know why other people do the things they do.

    And Bambi, didn't you see "Pretty Woman?" ...everyone knows that whores don't kiss on the lips.

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    Default Re: Confused

    I just think the dancer was acting stupid and slutty..hey, maybe thats why most of the men think they can get extras all the time, because there are more and more dancers who are doing stupid shit rather than keeping their head on their shoulders.

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