Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 29

Thread: Not to meddle but....

  1. #1
    Member
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    NoVa
    Posts
    27
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Angry Not to meddle but....

    I'm sort of "apprenticing" with a dancer who is a friend of mine and while I was at the club I spotted another friend's husband making out with a dancer. I don't want to stir things up but damn. He's got he two kids and is on public assistance bc he claims he can't find a job! And here he is blowing 100's of dollars and cheating on his wife right out in the open.
    I know it's not my place to say anything and it would even cause problems with the girl he's cheating with, but this is just the thing that gives strippers and clubs a bad name. Should there be a policy about screwing the people that pay to see you dance? I don't know, this situation just seems plain wrong to me.

  2. #2
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2003
    Location
    Waikiki, West Hollyhood
    Posts
    4,638
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    I say leave it alone ! Let the wife find out on her own or find a way to do let her know without telling her personally.
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  3. #3
    Newbie
    Joined
    Oct 2004
    Posts
    12
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Wow... that guy's a piece of shit. I wouldn't think twice about telling her.

  4. #4
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2003
    Location
    Waikiki, West Hollyhood
    Posts
    4,638
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Quote Originally Posted by Dylan Tyler
    Wow... that guy's a piece of shit. I wouldn't think twice about telling her.
    Normally I would agree with you. However I have been the bearer of bad news so many times only for it blow up in my face. Then the chick gets back together with the loser and all of a sudden I'm the "bad" person.
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  5. #5
    Featured Member tampadancer's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2004
    Location
    tampa
    Posts
    1,582
    Thanks
    178
    Thanked 394 Times in 179 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    send her an anonymous letter (with pictures of him in action if you can snap them!) explaining what is going on. she deserves to know.

    You'd want someone to tell you, wouldnt you?

  6. #6
    tampafldancer
    Guest

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    leave it alone., UNLESS SHE IS A really GOOD FRIEND.

    the girl is a fool to put up with his unemployed ass, what makes you think she would think any different about him cheating?

    its not your place!

  7. #7
    God/dess Bunny's Avatar
    Joined
    Feb 2003
    Posts
    2,495
    Thanks
    1
    Thanked 36 Times in 30 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    I'd want to know if it was happening to me but. What is really shitty about this situation is that if he's on public assistance ALL OF US are paying for him to get lap dances.

  8. #8
    God/dess PaigeDWinter's Avatar
    Joined
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Cocoa Beach, FL
    Posts
    10,220
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 52 Times in 37 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    I'd want to know if it were me. And anyone who is leaning on our taxes to get by shouldnt be there anyways. I say, if this girl is such a good pal, tell her. Anyone deserves to know when this is happening to them.
    Number of times Rickrolled on stage: 6
    *******************************

    Marasmus ... "Ladies don't fart. They butt-laugh."
    Marasmus says, "Oh no, that wasn't gas, it was merely a rectal chuckle."

    Marek says, "A friend of mine got punched in the face by a dominatrix stripper about two weeks ago and I thought of you."

  9. #9
    God/dess gypsy_girlchild's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Va mostly
    Posts
    2,750
    Thanks
    3
    Thanked 52 Times in 41 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Quote Originally Posted by Farrah_Holiday
    Normally I would agree with you. However I have been the bearer of bad news so many times only for it blow up in my face. Then the chick gets back together with the loser and all of a sudden I'm the "bad" person.
    I agree, the bearer of bad news really does ALWAYS become he bad person because the others don't know how to react towards the person that tried to help them. I f you can find a way to tell her without doing it yourself, good. If not, just avoid it at all costs.
    Yes, I would want to know, but I honestly wouldn't know how to fact the person that told me.
    Please don't lick me, it tickles..



  10. #10
    Veteran Member Stipperella's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    628
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Been there done that. I still dont' know what to tell you. You are gonna be damned if you do and damned if you don't. I have been in a similar situation and if you tell her she's gonna end up staying with him and you are gonna be the bad one. If you don't tell her you are still the bad one for not telling her. Knowing what i know now i think i would just leave it alone.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Archangel's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    NC
    Posts
    100
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Does he know you? If so, you could go over and say "Hi." while he's getting a dance. If he does love his wife even a tiny bit, it will scare the shit out of him that you might tell her and he might lose her. You'll never see him again.

    Of course, if he doesn't love her, or has mentally/emotionally abused his wife, it won't phase him in the least. In this case, your friend already knows what is going on and will turn on you out of embarassment if you "throw it in her face."

    Then of course there's the third option. He'll just go to a different club. But you may never find out about that.

    No matter what, unless she is a childhood friend of 20 years, do not mention it to her. Use the power of "fear of loss" on the husband. All that takes is a two letter word while he's in action.
    -=# Archangel

    "Who is to say what is a sin in God's eyes?" (Pearl from The Scarlet Letter)
    "Every man dies; not every man really lives." (William Wallace from Braveheart)

  12. #12
    Featured Member GnBeret's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Posts
    796
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 7 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Just my .02, but I've seen this scenario play out on multiple occasions and from pretty much every angle possible - and so far as I can tell, the best course of action is for you to stay out of their marriage, 'cause you never really know what the hell is going on in somebody else's marriage.
    "That's your answer Old Man? I guess you're a Hard Case too...."
    - Luke
    "Some men, you just can't reach...."
    - Boss, re Luke

    If there's one thing in my life these years have taught me,
    it's that you can always see it coming, but you can never stop it.
    -Cowboy Junkies

  13. #13
    God/dess erotictonic's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2003
    Location
    Watching lalaland
    Posts
    2,307
    Thanks
    17
    Thanked 39 Times in 34 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Put an anonymous letter on her car, or send it to her, if you know for certain she will be the one opening it. That way she will be alerted, but you will not take the responsibility for it.

  14. #14
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2003
    Location
    Waikiki, West Hollyhood
    Posts
    4,638
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Quote Originally Posted by GnBeret
    Just my .02, but I've seen this scenario play out on multiple occasions and from pretty much every angle possible - and so far as I can tell, the best course of action is for you to stay out of their marriage, 'cause you never really know what the hell is going on in somebody else's marriage.
    Exactly !
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  15. #15
    Member
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    NoVa
    Posts
    27
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Update:
    She found out on her own. Smart girl, she hijacked his phone last Friday while scumbag was sleeping and intercepted some text messages. She ended up calling the dancer the next morning. Turns out the dancer didn't know he was married and has been "dating" him since before Easter. Just another reason not to take customers home.

  16. #16
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2003
    Location
    Waikiki, West Hollyhood
    Posts
    4,638
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Ok..So what does she plan on doing to her hubby for "cheating" on her ??
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  17. #17
    Member
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    NoVa
    Posts
    27
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    She said something about getting a good lawyer and possibly pursuing a civil suit as well as a divorce. Apparently the "other woman" is gung-ho about helping nail this guys ass to the wall. I myself would probabley do something a bit more heinous and violent, but then again I don't have any little ones to worry about. Hopefully she'll stick to her guns and the other girl will continue to cooperate with her as far as evidence, etc..

  18. #18
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2003
    Location
    Waikiki, West Hollyhood
    Posts
    4,638
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    I hope so too. While I don't know whats going on in their marriage. I hate to see women being taken advantage of, especially when they know its happening.
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  19. #19
    Member
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    NoVa
    Posts
    27
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Regardless of the maritial situation, if he had any idea that his actions would affect anyone negitively he should have stopped short. Ecspecially in a situation where children are involved. I hope he get's a real nasty, good ol' boy type judge to stick it to him in court. Technically in Va, adulty is still illegal. That should make things a little more interesting.

  20. #20
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2003
    Location
    Waikiki, West Hollyhood
    Posts
    4,638
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 10 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Quote Originally Posted by Sunnsand
    Technically in Va, adulty is still illegal. That should make things a little more interesting.
    Oh, really ?? I agree the children should come first. But unfortunately he wasn't thinking along those lines. Also from what you wrote about him being unemployed it doesn't seem like his children are/were the most important thing is his life. Its sad people don't value their offspring more !

    But hopefully he will get a judge that makes him play a livable amount in child and spousal support. And also orders him to find a job !
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

    When someone shows you who they are, believe them.
    Maya Angelou


  21. #21
    Veteran Member toxicgirl's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2003
    Posts
    559
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    i've seen this stuff before otc. when i saw it happen (and this was my BEST friend's boy), i approached the guy and told him that he better tell my girl what he did or i would. he brushed it off. so i got him and her together, told her what happened and then decked him- hard! then i took my best friend out for some tea while she cried. poor girl! i would want my friends to tell me about this sort of stuff.

    i think this situation depends on how good of a friend this girl is. if she's only an aquaintance, i might let it be, but i would make sure the husband knew i disapproved of his actions. if she's a good friend- speak up and kick the guy's ass! as far as the other dancer, she's pretty much out of this. why? the guy can ALWAYS say 'no' to her. if it wasn't her, it woulda been another girl. the situation should be handled otc, if you choose to get involved.
    "RIP THE SYSTEM"

  22. #22
    Member
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    NoVa
    Posts
    27
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Yep. In Virginia, adultry is still illegal and if she were to go through the motions and file a police report she could get him arrested and held until a magistrate decided to bond him. My aunt did it to her husband he spent 70 hours in the local jail getting reamed be the female sheriff's deputies.

  23. #23
    Featured Member Amethyst's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2003
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    795
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 14 Times in 7 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    It's good that she found out. I'm glad you weren't forced to make a decision either way. If anything, I would have suggested you tell her anony.

    FWIW, I've been on both sides of the coin and am glad I made the decision to tell my friend her boyfriend was cheating on her (turned out that what she thought was a yeast infection was in fact an STD). My so-called friends knew my now ex-husband was not only cheating on me prior to our marriage but afterwards as well, and thus contributed to him putting my emotional and physical health at major risk. Thankfully, I got away without contracting any nasty stuff (since me and birth control never got along well, I insisted we used condoms to prevent pregnancy), but it could've just as easily gone the way of my friend.


  24. #24
    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Hurricane Wasteland,Louisiana
    Posts
    8,088
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 23 Times in 19 Posts

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    I am very pleased with how this turned out.What a loser.I hope his future ex wife and girlfriend takes his balls from him.
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

    中国大CHINESE BIG BOOBS!!!中国大




  25. #25
    Senior Member Alexis1313's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Hell
    Posts
    129
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 2 Times in 1 Post

    Default Re: Not to meddle but....

    Quote Originally Posted by onlythebest
    I am very pleased with how this turned out.What a loser.I hope his future ex wife and girlfriend takes his balls from him.
    Yep. This guy sounds like he deserves it.

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. my brother, my mother...should I meddle in it?
    By OJenni! in forum Life Support
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 10-02-2011, 12:55 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •