Short story lead in......![]()
About 10-15 years ago,i used to dj on a mini-me cruise ship out of the Baltimore inner harbor called the lady Baltimore or something like that.It was a kewl gig,i called it my gilligan gig because it was only like a 3 hour tour of the inner harbor kinda thing.
They would pay for my hotel in a high rise swanky place overlooking the harbor and within walking distance of the ship for the weekend.I only did like 2-3 trips all weekend so it left me alot of time to check out the city of my birth,to include the strip.
The strip was where all the SC's were and back then,it wasnt a pretty sight.This is waaaaaaaaay before "Nice"clubs really hit town like they have now.
Anyways.....
So i just finished a 3 hour tour and was walking thru the inner harbor about as stoned as a human individual could be,when i got roped into getting one of those charicators<sp>or drawings.
You know,the guys who sit at tourist traps all day in the hot sun and draw people for 20 bucks.They smell real bad but can draw real good kinda guys.
he was pretty kewl and it was fun shootin the shit with him while he drew my picture.I told him I was going to just give it away as a gag prize for some DJ contest i was gonna have some day and that i would have to autograph my siggy over his.
I think thats why he drew my forhead so big cause its NOT at big as the drawing!
Anyways....
Im walking around the inner harbor in Baltimore and decide to hit a strip club a few blocks over to see if I can steal a few one liners from the dj working.
It was terrible.
I hit like 5 clubs in a row and they all sucked major ass.
even the last club i went into sucked,but wow,did i see a diamond in the rough!!!
I dont even remember her name but she was nothing less then stunning.Pure alpha female,pure art,the deffinition of beautiful woman.
I even called home to my better half from the pay phone to tell her i was bringing home an entertainer.![]()
I would have paid ANYTHING to have this girl work at the club i did!
I talked to her for hours and nothing I said was going to get her to leave Blatimore,I even had the owner of the club and my better half on the phone trying to talk her into it,no dice.
Anyways,the boss wanted a picture of her before flying out to try court her.
Cell phone cameras and disposable cameras aint been invented yet,and i didnt have a poloroid or 35 mm on me,so whats a guy to do????
I ran like 4-5 blocks back to the inner harbor and got the guy doing the drawings to run like 4-5 blocks back to the club.
I gave him 100 bucks i think,and all the beer he could drink for two drawings.One for her,one for the boss man.
I swear both of the drawings didnt do her justice,but each one could have hung in an art gallery!
I bought 2 hours of her time,and from what i remember,2-3 pitchers of beer for the artist,me and the dancer.
We sat and shot the shit about the world while the smelly guy drew her picture.
I got one drawing and when i gave her the other one,she got all teary eyed.
I had rocked her world and she told me so.
In an attempt to pave her streets with gold,I accidentially rocked her world.
i have not tried this as a premeditated approach,but im guessing if you have a artist come in and draw your ATF,it might have the same result as I encountered by mistake.
Cant be much,less then 50 bucks+beer?
before you ask.....
If YOU keep the picture,that makes you a stalker.
If she keeps the picture,that makes you a romantic.



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