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Thread: Dancers:Whats creepier?

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    Veteran Member Lurker_001's Avatar
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    Default Dancers:Whats creepier?

    What's creepier.Getting profesions of strong feelings from a new customer or someone you've known for a while?

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    Veteran Member Heaven777's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    ACH! BOTH!! Because we are FANTASY girls and some guys just don't realize that they are PAYING us for our affections....GEESH....
    If everything you try is a sure thing, you aren't taking enough risks. If you never fail, you put a limit on the degree to which you can succeed. In short, the only way to win big is to risk losing

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    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    Can you say........POTENTIAL STALKER in both cases???
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

    中国大CHINESE BIG BOOBS!!!中国大




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    Featured Member Muyaha's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    what do you mean by someone you've known for a while?? like a customer that has become a regular? or do you mean the guy I went to highschool with or lived down the block from me?

    I may have many faults, but being wrong ain't one of them.

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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    Neither.
    Number of times Rickrolled on stage: 6
    *******************************

    Marasmus ... "Ladies don't fart. They butt-laugh."
    Marasmus says, "Oh no, that wasn't gas, it was merely a rectal chuckle."

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    Veteran Member Jayln's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    It's annoying, but not creepy. This has happened alot to me, nothing out of the ordinary.
    For once you have tasted flight you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you will long to return.

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    Member Jezebel Rules's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    I would have to say from someone you've known for a while. And it's not creepy, but uncomfortable, becuz they usually spring this kind of stuff up out of nowhere. From a new customer, that stuff is typical. With someone you've known while, you see expect to see them and have a good time. When they start professing their emotions, it's all downhill from there.

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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    Yes, its always better to tell a dancer how much they disgust you.

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    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    Not creepy, just uncomfortable. I know that I will be walking a fine line with this customer from there on out. I will try to keep him paying without promising anything to him. I will use language like, I think you are a nice person, too.

    I will also try to make light of the situation. So he understands that his feelings aren't returned, and to ground him a bit more in the situation. IF it gets too bad he gets his walking papers, and I won't dance for him anymore.

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    Featured Member amylynnej's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    both creepy.
    AmyLynne

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    Veteran Member Lurker_001's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    Since this post is back at the top and not dead yet,i should say something.

    I posted this to find out if it's creepy or whatever to tell a Entertainer that you like her.

    History:Long story short.She's entertaining me again after i had found another girl.She left and now i'm back buying dances from her.It was at the same club and as much fun as the second girl was i could never get her out of my head.
    I spend alot on her when i go,more then i used to.She pretty much gets the whole budget with stage tips,VIPs and VIP tip.

    The Dancer i'm talking about,i think she knows and has known for a while now.I never told her outright but let something slip once.Further down the road another Dancer asked "what do you think of soandso?".I said "she's a good entertainer".I think she knows i like her but i've never said anything straight out about it.

    I know it's a job,she most likely has a S.O..Even if she didn't i wouldn't have a snowballs chance in hell hooking up with her anyways,blah blah blah.
    Anyway,i wanted to know if it was ok to tell her.Probably not,if she's already suspecting that i already like her.I know it's wrong,but... i really do like her,a bunch.Telling her and creeping her out would suck but i guess that's part of her job.

    It's so childish that maybe telling her would "Break the ice",i'd get over it and move on...Has this ever happened to you?

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    Banned All Good Things's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    Dancers get asked out a gazillion times a night. You are just one in a long string of other customers. Even if you "like her a lot."

    Here's one thought. Why don't you wait until she asks you? If she's really interested in you OTC, you will find out soon enough. If not, then just be cool about it and be a good customer in the club. It's probably better not to put her in the position of having to use a line on you. Especially if you "like her a lot."

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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    ^ Amen.

    <S> TOO
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

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    Featured Member Crow's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    Excellent advice. As a veteran dancer I am all business. In my younger years I made the mistake of taking a customer and making him my at the time 'boyfriend'. WOW! That was the biggest mistake I ever made in my entire life. It ended badly of course and now I have friends.. do I see any of them outside of the club? No, and only if I run into them at wal-mart. Plus at that time they usually have their wives with them so I'm safe. Yay!


    Rhiannon
    Southern 'gal and sister in the thong brigade.

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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    Whether they will admit it or not, I imagine most customers have had unrealistic feelings about a dancer at one time or another. If she doing her job its hard not to. Fortunately, most dancers learn to take this in stride unless the customer is exhibiting really creepy or stalky behavior. Just telling her you really like her IMO doesnt put you in that catagory but it most likely will make you a PL in her eyes. All in all, in spite of your feelings its best to keep it professional.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    Quote Originally Posted by Lurker_001
    Since this post is back at the top and not dead yet,i should say something.

    I posted this to find out if it's creepy or whatever to tell a Entertainer that you like her....

    It's so childish that maybe telling her would "Break the ice",i'd get over it and move on...Has this ever happened to you?
    If a dancer is happy to see you OTC, she'll generally make it apparent. I see three dancers OTC, (on a purely friendly basis), at the moment and in each case it's been clear that there's been a genuine liking between us.

    One, I'd been bumping into on an off for a year and we'd always enjoyed long conversations. One night, unbeknown to each other we both ended up at a venue not knowing the other was there. The first time we knew it was when I turned round and she was literaly two foot away. Our immediate instinct was to give each other a massive hug - it was frankly quite an emotional moment. After that it was obvious we wanted each other's phone numbers.

    Another, I just drifted into meeting. We'd known each other on and off for several months when she asked me for a lift from the venue to the railway station she needed to get to so she could go home. This then graduated to me taking her home, and then to stopping for a drink on the way. Now, we are happy to be round each other's houses, etc.

    As an aside, this dancer does have an SO, whom I get on very well with. He knows his dancer gf and I agreed a long time ago our friendship was to be platonic, and actually encourages it. He would never accompany her to work, and he knows if she asks me along she's in very safe hands. He also knows the dancer and I like each others company, and is quite happy if she and I disappear off for a meal together. A slightly strange relationship, but all three of us are relaxed about it.

    The third dancer and I found there was an immediate chemistry between us. I met her in a British strip pub. This is a very different environment from a US lap dance club, and in this particular pub there are no private dances, so it's possible to to chat for a long time without affecting the dancer's earnings. We talked without stopping for five hours, broken only by the need for her to get up and dance every 20 minutes or so.

    I think it took her an hour to put an arm round my shoulders, and it felt quite natural to both of us. After that, the only question we had was, when do we next meet? That's not to say the relationship immediatly went OTC - it was just very clear that was where it was headed.

    ----------------------------------------

    The reason I've posted the above three stories is to show you that it was obvious both the dancers and I were happy to change the nature of our relationship.

    I think you have to be very clear what will happen if you try and move your relationship OTC. If the dancer you are interested in is not willing to change her relationship with you, then if you ask I think you will immediately find she takes a more "distant" attitude to you.

    You have to be clear that at the moment you represent good income to this dancer. It's entirely possible that this dancer has a genuine liking for you, and enjoys your company within the club. However, she may well view this as a "professional" relationship. Many dancers are far more relaxed performing for someone whom they know and trust - sounds like you treat her well and you are infinately preferable to some grabby drunk.

    However, the fact that she lets you spend a lot of money on her is not a good sign. If dancers want to see you OTC then they tend to be less keen on money - they want you as a friend, not a customer. The dancers I am friends with OTC have made it clear they do not want me to spend on them inside the venues - (drinks are fine, but not tips).

    If you want to hook up with her, I'd say forget it. The fact that she's been dancing for you means that you will be categorised as "customer" in her mind. It's a big mental leap for a dancer to move you from the customer to the bf category, and the mental leap required becomes greater the longer she dances for you. If she wanted to you as a bf she would have been dropping hints.

    If you want her as a friend, then she may agree to meet you OTC, but agree ground rules first and never deviate from them. Telling her that the meal is purely friendly and then asking for a kiss is going to have very predictable results.

    I think you are in the situation that you will not be happy unless you ask her if you can meet her OTC - unless you do it will always be an unanswered question in your mind. However, please be reconciled to the idea that she may decide she wants to see less of you even as a customer - she's there to earn money and a customer wanting an emotional involement complicates that.

    If you do talk to her be absolutely honest - say I've developed a liking for you, but recognise this might not be fully recriprocated. Tell her that you realise situations where customers tell dancers of their affections might not be welcomed by the dancer and the last thing you want to do is cause her discomfort. Tell her that you will fully understand if she wants to keep things "professional" and await developments. Above all, do not talk her and you into an embarrassing corner.

    If she makes it clear that she does not want an OTC relationship accept it immediatly and apologise for misunderstanding the situation. Tell her the matter is closed, and you'll not mention it again. However, you cannot "untell" her - one way or another you will irrevocably change your relationship.

    Phil.

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    Featured Member rusdancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    When guys act obsessive,it's always creepy scary.I experienced that many times,so I can usually tell when that's going to happen and distance myself.

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    Member rawkergirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Dancers:Whats creepier?

    off the subject, I know, but please excuse me...

    kick ass avatar, rusdancer!

    I'm a big star/I make a big rock and roll hiss/I'd like to love you, but my heart is a sore/ I am, I am, I'm so yours/Ka-Boom, Ka-Boom ah


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