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Thread: Why the social stigma of strippers?

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    Default Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Ladies, these are just a few thoughts from the my male perspective...

    1. Men are visual creatures that are easily sucked into the fantasy. It is partly their own fault for that. But, hang out in a SC long enough, spend enough money, drink too many drinks, and you really start to believe the stripper actually likes you. They may on some levels, but honestly to date a stripper is occupational suicide for a stripper...

    2. Men are by some, misled to believe this... "You are coming back" etc... "I love your hair" etc, etc ...

    3. Men sometimes get angry with strippers who are most likely pulling more than $20.00 an hour. The poor sap may be making $15.00 an hour working a construction sight...But again the some strippers pays a price emotionally... Examples: Feeling like a sex object. Dealing with D**k head rude patrons, and the nawing thought in back of their minds "I cannot do this forever" or "What will I do when my looks are gone?" "Is this all I have to offer the world"... Those thoughts a stripper hates to think about....

    4. A seasoned stripper is a master of reading a man who walks in a sc...
    Yes, they use all the tricks that they need to keep the man tipping...
    Not all, but a good majority... That is their job... This "feeling mislead" is not entirely the strippers fault, but also the man for falling into the the web, or even going to a sc in the first place... But it is so easy for a man to feel being played...

    5. Most men try to kid themselves into believing that it is more than a fantasy.

    6. Some strippers with a social concious, and hate this "misleading men" deep down inside, and want to numb it out with alcohol, cocaine, or whatever it takes... This is why many want to "get out of the business"...

    7. If you ever take your girlfriend to a sc, they get pissed quickly... Why?
    Because they see through the "tricks used" to remove the man's money...
    Of course most are also pissed because they do not look as sexy, or question why they are not as sexy as strippers... We live in a youth worship society reinforced not only by beer ads, but shows like Entertainment Tonight... Wealth, beauty, celebrity status, and a huge manshion equates success...

    These are just my findings... Correct me if I am wrong... No offending is intended... StripCool

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    Senior Member Truce's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Good post! Thanks

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by StripCool

    6. Some strippers with a social concious, and hate this "misleading men" deep down inside, and want to numb it out with alcohol, cocaine, or whatever it takes... This is why many want to "get out of the business"...


    I don't think a lot of women take drugs or alcohol or want to get out because of their social conscience overriding them. That they feel so bad about misleading they have to get out. It's more about being numb to having to DEAL with what you're doing and the people you have to do it for. Sometimes you just get tired of the assholes and perverts and you just want to forget...
    Last edited by Jay Zeno; 05-18-2005 at 05:00 AM. Reason: fixing the quotes
    gWEN**

    *every passing minute is another chance to turn it all around*

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    bostondancer
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Lol , I think its so funny how guys read so much into stripping . People get upset with us for making so much money because they don't think we deserve it . Anyone who works hard deserves the pay they receive be it a laywer , Bar tenders etc . You don't go to a bar an tell the Bar tender that he isn't that good looking and you want 2 drink for the price of one because your a mail man and you should be making more than him ! No 2 people are the same and that goes for dancers , we don't all view the job in the same way so your wasting your time with your humorous anology . Just come in and enjoy it for what it is just like you would do anywhere else , I mean is a movie ticket really worth 7 or 8 bucks !? I am not trying to bitch at you but I am just so sick of these post trying to uncover some plot . We are not after your money in the sense that we are trying to rob you I mean DAMN we are providing a service or a show and for some reason alot of guys think that they shouldn't have to pay BUT GUESS WHAT , thats life ... do you jump the fence and sneak into every concert you have seen ? No you don't ....not all dancers or women for that matter are gold diggers , not many of us feel bad about what we do either so ur little " question our worth" is BS too . Its fun its very easy and we get to hang with our friends and we make alot of money , thats it end of story !!

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    bostondancer
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Yeah Gwen I agree with you on that too , I think most people would drink on thier jobs if they could and does that mean that they questioning themselves ? No I don't think so , work sucks no matter what you do or how much you make ....

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    Member prairie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    a lot of guys do read into the whole thing too much, and that's always awkward.

    but there's always a few girls who offer more than they're willing to come through with (extras, a date, etc) just to get a guy to open up their wallet. i'm sure in time it'll come back to bite them in the ass.

    mostly i just smile and have faith that the person i'm trying to get a dance from isn't that type. it's what keeps me coming back.

    as far as girls getting pissed off in the strip club, i haven't experienced that yet. mostly they drink a little too much and try to crawl up on the stage.

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    BostonStripper: I appreciate your input. But I disagree. "Not all work sucks". I happen to love my job... StripCool

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    I happen to love stripping...and I don't do drugs or need to drink to do it. I did take an LOA due to the fact that I don't need the money...but with a toddler, I DO need the sleep. May go back soon...

    The problem with the OP is that I am expected to care why someone does or does not like what my JOB is.

    I don't go into any CEO's office and bitch, moan, and complain that they are making more money than I am.

    Lame.

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    I am just voicing my opinion. Nothing more. Some focus on a certain point I made and agree. Some may not want to really think about it. I understand we all need to make a living. Some choose stripping out of financial need. I am by no means an expert. That is why I asked for input. A few have agreed with some points. I am not hear to preach! I just feel that the truth.... whatever it is... helps us all... No I don't think strippers are bad... I have not walked in their shoes, or should I say platforms? StripCool

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    Senior Member Lolita86's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    I don't understand why you are reading so much into it. We are there to provide a service, just go and have a good time. Correct me if I'm wrong but considering your previous posts, you seem to be one of those types of people who likes to psychoanalyze everything in their path. There's nothing wrong with that, though. My father is like that. But we're there to provide entertainment, and that's what you should be looking for in a strip club. Strippers are just PEOPLE providing a SERVICE just like the people who file your taxes, cut your hair, or mow your lawn. Do you try to "pick apart" them and the reasons they do what they do? (Hmmmm, well gee... this person cutting my hair is only doing it for the money!! They don't really like me!!) ... no shit. Strippers are no different. Human beings....doing a job. For money. Just like everyone else.

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Simply and concisely, social stigmas of strippers exist because people outside the industry (AFCs and fugly wives/GFs) don't understand the dynamics of how SCs work, yet they feel compelled through personal inadequacies and insecurities to needlessly analyze, criticize and ostracize those working within the industry and those that intelligently (and not so intelligently) patronize it.

    That's it.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

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    bostondancer
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Yeah strip uncool , I think ur missing our point STOP asking , who cares ....damn

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    The social stigma of strippers comes in part because men fantasise about them and assume their behaviour inside a strip club continues outside that club.

    In reality a dancer inside a club adopts a "stripper persona". This tends to be for two reasons:

    (a) To feed the standard male fantasies by being the stereotypical stripper - thus maximising earnings. (And stepping outside the fantasy while working hits earnings - so most dancers stay in "character".)

    (b) To maintain a pyschological distance between work and real life.

    Unfortunately, the vast majority of men never get to know a dancer outside of work, and thus never get to know her as an indvidual, not just as a fantasy figure. Most dancers outside of work behave very differently to when they are working - (I have been surprised how shy some dancers are away from a strip club).

    Because she's always a "fantasy figure", 99% of men who talk about dancers know:

    (i) She's an exhibishionist who get a real kick out of being naked in front of strangers.

    (ii) Because she "grinds" on men's laps, she sleeps with them at the drop of a hat.

    (iii) Etc, etc.

    It's a real Catch 22 for a dancer - the reality of what they do is far, far distant from the fantasy, and yet telling customers the truth, (I do this for the money and don't read any more into it than that), will hit their earnings. Far easier to stay in "character" and conform to stereotype.

    So, IMHO, the stigma comes from this catch 22 - dancers adopt a persona at work because it maximises earnings, etc; yet the steroetype projected by that persona confirms the prejudices that people have about dancers. Because very few men ever meet a dancer outside of a strip club and get to know her as an individual, the sterotype persists and the stigma remains.

    Phil.

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    Veteran Member Heaven777's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    ha! ...BD hit it on the nose...
    If everything you try is a sure thing, you aren't taking enough risks. If you never fail, you put a limit on the degree to which you can succeed. In short, the only way to win big is to risk losing

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    Veteran Member Emiliana's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by StripCool
    I am just voicing my opinion. Nothing more. Some focus on a certain point I made and agree. Some may not want to really think about it. I understand we all need to make a living. Some choose stripping out of financial need. I am by no means an expert. That is why I asked for input. A few have agreed with some points. I am not hear to preach! I just feel that the truth.... whatever it is... helps us all... No I don't think strippers are bad... I have not walked in their shoes, or should I say platforms? StripCool

    Ok honey you seem to be taking a defensive tone now that we are dissecting you're opinion. Well, when you make a post you will get feedback, that is the nature of forums. I'm not going to apologize that I disagree with less that 2% of your post. Quite honestly you don't know what your talking about and you have not made any "discoveries" and will cause no "revelations". I'm sorry if this was what you had thought. I may be expressing my offense a little harshly but your manner in telling me about myself and what I must do and feel because of my occupation but I despise it when people do this, especially when they are wrong. But then again you are perfectly allowed to make any post you desire. This is also the nature of forums. Just don't expect anyone to marvel at you're "sage" wisdom.
    This post may have gone over better on the blue site...note this in regards to future posts.
    Emiliana



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    Senior Member Head Boy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    It seems to me that strippers are basically honest, but do a bit of hard selling (just like car and insurance salesmen). What annoys me are the pseudo-moralists that bang on about their virtuous lives, but secretly go to strip clubs and view porn sites - they also blatantly steal money from their customers. PayPal execs are a prime example of this.

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    Veteran Member Nina's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    StripCool seems to want to know what goes on in a strippers mind..... He's probably a good paying regular at some club somewhere...Hell it may even be your club or mine.......Why kill the fantasy for this poor guy....Just like any other customer he thinks he wants to know whats up---- but does he really want his fantasy killed? Or is he still on a quest to have a "one night stand w/ a stripper"

    For the Love of God ladies!!! Do you guys think this is why it's so much harder to get $$ from Joe Average? Let's stop killing the fantasy!
    Sexy, Swarovski Stripper jewelry, OOAK, and DIY clothing


    "Acceptance is right. Kindness is right. Love is right. I pray, right now, that we're moving into a kinder time when prejudice is overcome by understanding; when narrow-mindedness, and narrow-minded bigotry is overwhelmed by open-hearted empathy; when the pain of judgmentalism is replaced by the purity of love"
    Janet Jackson

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Strip clubs have a bad name because nudity and sex have a bad name. Most people in our society equate both with sin (at least when someone else is doing it.) It's OK to see people getting killed on TV every night but show a naked breast? Horrors! Children might see it! Hypocrisy rules.
    Friends Of Naked Dancing Ladies (FONDL)

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Take your Yoda-like "wisdom" over to the blue site and figure this one out. On your way, stop at Barnes and Noble and pick up some more lame books you can directly pull quotes from and pretend that they are yours.

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Well Phil W: You deserve the best explaination award regarding this heated debate... The ladies really got P.O.ed regarding my lack of understanding... I still like strippers, but it is unlikely I will have a relationship with one... I think the annoyance of stereotypes aggravate the strippers the most... Sorry ladies, I am just a "Newbie".....

    Like you said Phil, "it is a catch 22"... Tell the a club patron the truth and there goes your business... Thanks, Phil

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by StripCool
    Ladies, these are just a few thoughts from the my male perspective...

    1. Men are visual creatures that are easily sucked into the fantasy. It is partly their own fault for that. But, hang out in a SC long enough, spend enough money, drink too many drinks, and you really start to believe the stripper actually likes you. They may on some levels, but honestly to date a stripper is occupational suicide for a stripper...

    2. Men are by some, misled to believe this... "You are coming back" etc... "I love your hair" etc, etc ...
    Not every guy who regularly hits the SC and blows a bunch of money believes the fantasy. And for some of us, the fantasy does actually come true. My circle of friends is one example - every one of us is either dating (long term) or married to a stripper (or former stripper).

    3. Men sometimes get angry with strippers who are most likely pulling more than $20.00 an hour. The poor sap may be making $15.00 an hour working a construction sight...But again the some strippers pays a price emotionally... Examples: Feeling like a sex object. Dealing with D**k head rude patrons, and the nawing thought in back of their minds "I cannot do this forever" or "What will I do when my looks are gone?" "Is this all I have to offer the world"... Those thoughts a stripper hates to think about....
    The guys who get angry about strippers making more than them are just insecure little bitches. Who gives a fuck what a stripper makes? I care about what I make. Her income is her business.


    4. A seasoned stripper is a master of reading a man who walks in a sc...
    Yes, they use all the tricks that they need to keep the man tipping...
    Not all, but a good majority... That is their job... This "feeling mislead" is not entirely the strippers fault, but also the man for falling into the the web, or even going to a sc in the first place... But it is so easy for a man to feel being played...
    He wouldn't feel played if he walked into the club understanding that it isn't a harem of hot sluts dying to get their chance to fuck him. His problem.


    5. Most men try to kid themselves into believing that it is more than a fantasy.
    But for a few of us, it is.


    6. Some strippers with a social concious, and hate this "misleading men" deep down inside, and want to numb it out with alcohol, cocaine, or whatever it takes... This is why many want to "get out of the business"...
    True, and sad. Some girls develop substance abuse problems to self-medicate, others start stripping to finance their existing substance abuse problems. I know quite a few girls who get out of stripping mainly because society looks down on strippers, and they want to feel respected socially. Most people treat women diffeently when they hear the word "stripper".


    7. If you ever take your girlfriend to a sc, they get pissed quickly... Why?
    Because they see through the "tricks used" to remove the man's money...
    Of course most are also pissed because they do not look as sexy, or question why they are not as sexy as strippers... We live in a youth worship society reinforced not only by beer ads, but shows like Entertainment Tonight... Wealth, beauty, celebrity status, and a huge manshion equates success...
    Every girl I've brought to a SC has had a great time. My exGF never had a problem with it because she knew I was 100% faithful to her.

    These are just my findings... Correct me if I am wrong... No offending is intended... StripCool

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    Veteran Member Emiliana's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Hef-you rule..well said.
    Nina-I would not ruin his little fanstasy if we were in the club...but this is not the club. It's stripper web and I love these forums...especially because people are staight up and don't indulge the men. If I wanna kiss ass I will do it in the club. On these boards I refuse to baby anyone and I will give my real opnion. I apologize if I sound like I am attacking you...this the farthest thing from my intentions...I'm just irked at thought of guys being babied here, a relative safe haven relating to work...I do enough of it at the club.
    Emiliana



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    Member rawkergirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by former_LV_dancer
    Take your Yoda-like "wisdom" over to the blue site and figure this one out. On your way, stop at Barnes and Noble and pick up some more lame books you can directly pull quotes from and pretend that they are yours.
    "Now, the Force is an energy field made up of all living things... It surrounds us... penetrates us..." *SCREEEEEECH* Um, you said "Yoda" and I was gone! Sorry.

    Your post made me chuckle.

    Anyway, as a customer, I enjoy the environment and look forward to spending the money I designate for "This Girl's Night Out." I'll leave all the "why" mumbo jumbo to the thesis writers.

    No matter the reason a lady strips, I hope your money keeps rolling in and life is good. Thank you for your entertainment!

    ~taking my usual seat by the stage~

    I'm a big star/I make a big rock and roll hiss/I'd like to love you, but my heart is a sore/ I am, I am, I'm so yours/Ka-Boom, Ka-Boom ah


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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    Quote Originally Posted by rawkergirl
    "Now, the Force is an energy field made up of all living things... It surrounds us... penetrates us..." *SCREEEEEECH* Um, you said "Yoda" and I was gone! Sorry.
    Sorry...nice try, but that was Obi Wan...not Yoda.

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    Default Re: Why the social stigma of strippers?

    In nine out of ten cases, waffles are better than strippers. They even hold syrup and butter better do to their design.

    So to ask which is better is a bit silly imo.
    You can't love something you think is flawless - me


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