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Thread: How dumb are your customers?

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    Member Taylor's Avatar
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    Default How dumb are your customers?

    The other night, like normal, I had a customer hassling me to go with him. He wouldn't leave me alone, so I finally told him that I was saving myself for marriage. He seemed to buy it and left me alone. So it made me wonder, how dumb are your customers? And what are some ridiculous lines you've used on them that they've actually believed?

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    Default Re: How dumb are your customers?

    I can honestly say that I havent met many outright dumb customers. Drunk, yes. Dumb, no. A lot of the folks that I've run into over the years were surprisingly smart. But I dont think the ratio is much different to any other type of establishment or social situation. There's all kinds.
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    Default Re: How dumb are your customers?

    Well,the more the customers drink,the more their IQ drops exponentially,LOL!!!
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    Default Re: How dumb are your customers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Taylor
    The other night, like normal, I had a customer hassling me to go with him. He wouldn't leave me alone, so I finally told him that I was saving myself for marriage. He seemed to buy it and left me alone. So it made me wonder, how dumb are your customers? And what are some ridiculous lines you've used on them that they've actually believed?
    Not quite the purpose of this thread, but what the hell. In the UK there's a dancer that is really pretty, but not renowned for having two brain cells to rub together.

    I've gone to a club to pick up a dancer I know to give her a lift home. She goes off to the changing room to change into her street clothes, leaving her handbag, (containing her earnings) with me for safety.

    The above mentioned pretty but dumb dancer, (who has seen me in strip venues many a time and knows me well enough to chat to regularly), comes over, collecting for her floor show. For a laugh I flap the handbag at her, make with the limp wrist and lisp, "sorry I've just turned gay - I'm not interested anymore".

    To my complete amazement, instead of firing back with a smart-arse response of her own, she flounces off, muttering why did I bother to come into the club if I was gay? Go figure.

    Phil.

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    Default Re: How dumb are your customers?

    No matter where you go there is always going to be the person thats well not the brightest crayon in the box. The dimmer people of the world are easier to talk to and ask me less annoying questions. These are the kinda people that come to have a good time w/o all the hum drum "can I take you home" stuff. They dont ask these things b/c their egos along with their intellgence is not as high as the others.

    So, to me they are funny and of course I am not laughing with them.
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    Senior Member Truce's Avatar
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    Default Re: How dumb are your customers?

    My god i got a million stories but the best one involved a custy and a girl at my club:

    I was sitting down chatting with a group of guys when this blonde (sorry but she really was) came and sat with us and joined in the conversation. We she asked one of the guys what he did for a job he replied:

    "I am a jelly fish trainer". I just looked at him as if you gotta be fucking kidding right she would never fall for that. she replied:

    "No way really? That is the coolest job i have ever heard of!?! How do you train them? She asked. To which he replied:

    "Well we have little tanks and they have little electric shocks hooked up to them and what we do is hold a little hoop close to the water and then we shock the water and it jumps up throu the hoop. Its really cool you should come see it some time". She replied:

    "Oh that doesnt hurt them at all does it.....?"


    The way he was telling her was with such honestly the poor blonde didnt have a chance. We all just sat there in complete astonishment for a second looking at her then all on cue we completely burst into laughter!!!!! It was the fucking funniest thing i have ever heard at work...

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    Default Re: How dumb are your customers?

    I have only met one dumb customer,it was long long ago in a far far away land and can in no way resemble anyone living or posting on this board.

    I see this reg come in one night,but his entertainer is already in the back with someone else.
    He sits around for 15-20 mins and finally comes up into the dj booth to ask about her.
    so off to the back i went like a good little djbitch.
    I found out she had about 5 mins left on a 30 min dance and would be out after that to see him.

    And thats exactly what i should have told him.

    I blame that nights intake of sassperrilla's.

    When i got back to the dj booth,I told him that she was having a bit of a "female"problem.
    That usually sums it up for most guys and we ask no more questions,but not this guy.
    He starts cracking jokes."is she bloated this week","should i go put my jeans on and get out of these light colored dockers"etc.

    again,I blame the drankin.

    I told him "No,actually,during her last stage set,her left breast deflated and she has been in the dressing room for an hour trying to blow it back up with the foot pump,trying to get it the same size as the left one".

    He just said real serious like "ohhhhhhhhhhhh ok,i can wait"and went and sat down at his table.

    Im not saying he was all that dumb,im just saying I bet i cudda sold him a bridge.
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    Veteran Member Yea's Avatar
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    Default Re: How dumb are your customers?

    Few of my customers are dumb.. that’s why they get dances from me! Ok, in all seriousness for this post.. the dumbest custy I ever had thought he could rip me of cuz he pretended not to speak english and claimed to not have cash, however he had forgotten the fact that the waitress had his credit card


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    Default Re: How dumb are your customers?

    Alcohol + naked tits + men = rampant stupidity.

    I can't be bothered to make up some story about why I won't go with them. I just flat refuse and if they keep hounding, I move on to the next empty lap.

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