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Thread: Do you wear a wedding band?

  1. #1
    Featured Member Lizette's Avatar
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    Default Do you wear a wedding band?

    I was thinking about wearing a simple wedding band. I'm not married. I totally unattatched. Men over 70 want to be my sugar daddy, which I find grotesque because I am not some kept woman. I want to send a blatant signal that I am not available to interested parties. I do not, however, want to scare off true costumers who pay me dance by dance and will not pester me to go on vacations with them ... because, obviously, no does not mean no.

    Furthermore, my personal life is no one's business. When I refuse to tell them if I shave "down there," the septogenarians get pissed, as do the nasty drug dealers.

    Eh-hm, so do you think wearing a wedding band hurts good, non-drama sales?

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    Featured Member screaminpeachez's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    hehehe
    well baby girl,
    I am married and wear my rings.
    most guys never notice it...

    Usually you have to flaunt it pretty heavily.

    You can tell the good guy that it's Not and tell the bad ones that it Is...
    "may your work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, dance like no-one is watching, screw like your being filmed and drink like a true Irishman "--anonymous
    "GOD is LOVE, but get it in writing"- Gypsy Rose Lee

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  3. #3
    buffie06
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    I would not recommend it. I did for awhile and noticed a dip in my earnings, as well, verrry many men commented on it. They want to think they have a chance with you. Wearing a wedding band immediately ruins their fantasy. I even wore a $3 costume jewelry pinki ring and I got sooo many questions about my husband, who wears a pinki wedding ring anyways?

    I always tell the losers that I am and the big spenders that im not, the ring will hurt you more than help, in my experience. No body wants to give you money when they think you should have that support already.

    brandi

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    Member scoobydoo7513's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    I got married after I was already dancing and I actually noticed that I made more money when I had a ring on my finger. I actually find that some men find it a turn on and others find it a challenge.

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    Banned BigGreenMnM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Always alot of different responses to this age old question.

    If your not married,I would advise NOT adding this issue to your bag of tricks,you dont need anything extra creating doubts in your mind.
    Besides,if you do get married,your going to have to cross this bridge anyways.
    Why wake this giant sleeping drama giant if you dont have to??

    I know alot of single girls,when they go out clubbin,they wear a fake wedding ring just to keep the guys off them.It doesnt stop all the guys,but it sure stops alot of them.

    Thats NOT the result your looking for when inside the club sellin LD's.

    Leave the rings at home ladies.

    Many industries wont allow you to wear rings at work,this one will,and if ever a industry should set a rule against them,this one should imo!

    Regardless of what anyone tells you,wearing a ring does cost you money.
    And heres the kicker,the guys who wont get a LD from you because of it,those are the nice guys who you really want to deal with,not the guys who want to talk abot your hubby and all the added questions a wedding ring ALWAYS brings.
    ex:
    "how does your hubby feel about your dancing?"
    Now you gotta invent a fake hubby to go along with your fake wedding ring.

    Unless your custie has a fantasy about fuckin a married woman,the ring kills the fantasy more times then not.
    If your married,put it on a hidden piercing,tape it inside your boot,or leave it in the dressing room(no fuckin way,leave it at home)either way,keep it hidden IMO.

    Its a question magnet.

  6. #6
    Featured Member Lizette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    I used to wear a wedding band all the time OTC. As I am honest about my age, I am questioned why I am not married. When I had a boyfriend, I was honest about that too.

    My biggest spenders ($200+) have never asked about my personal life. Not one has asked if I like women, if I take it up the a$$, if my daddy beat me. Did they ask me if I was in school? No. The never cared. They respected me and took the entertainment at face value.

    BGM, I already have a fake life. I pretend that I have been dancing for 10 years. I do not like anyone probing about my old job. I might mention college if I think it'd help the conversation and entertainment value. Other than that, that's about all they think they know of me. Why not be married?

    "Does your boyfriend know you dance?" <---- I hear this all the time.
    "Of course he does. He's the luckiest man in the world to have me." <------ My response.

    Telling them I have a boyfriend is not good enough. Boyfriends come and go, so basically, I seem available. These guys are *not* big spenders. I might sell $40. I could easily sell someone else who wouldn't toss out this sh*t. I'd rather spend time with someone who wants an entertainer.

    I'm glad that you responded screaminpeachez. I was wondering if you wore your rings!

  7. #7
    Featured Member screaminpeachez's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Yes, and I have NEVER lost money from it!
    I even have long time reg custys (of 5+ years) that didn't notice. (and I won't tell THEM)

    BGM, I had been told over & over in my introduction to dancing to not let them know that you're married or dating anyone....

    hehehe... Largely most girls should not.
    It depends on the degree and type of hustle you give.

    with a man that is forlorn in his marriage, he actually might prefer you to "be in the same boat"
    I've doubled my money in some situations because the man believed that.
    He could relate to me and believed I sympathized with him.
    Like we were "safe and unjudged" together.

    Also it's not that difficult to say that you WERE engaged etc. but, that it is over now.

    Sometimes I tell them flat-out that I'm Happily married...
    and they not only give me dances but, spend alot thinking that they'll show me how THEY are such a great guy!

    As strange and unlikely as it seems, it's all true.

    But, I need to stress that I wear a TON of jewelry...
    nearly a ring on every finger (spare a few).

    That might make a difference, because they may not notice it as often due to that.
    "may your work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, dance like no-one is watching, screw like your being filmed and drink like a true Irishman "--anonymous
    "GOD is LOVE, but get it in writing"- Gypsy Rose Lee

    http://www.myspace.com/screaminpeachez

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    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    I made MORE money when I wore my engagement ring... go figure... not sure what was up with that.. and there was a girl I used to work with that wore her wedding rings always without fail... never took those off, and she did well too..

    Some guys find it a turn on to see a married woman as a dancer.. not sure why though...


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    Banned BigGreenMnM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Quote Originally Posted by screaminpeachez
    BGM, I had been told over & over in my introduction to dancing to not let them know that you're married or dating anyone....

    hehehe... Largely most girls should not.
    It depends on the degree and type of hustle you give.
    Gots no probs with that,every girl is different.

    If I were to tell 100 girls NOT to wear an eyepatch,5% of them would still make money if they did,right off the bat.
    They are the 5%.
    Then there is the 20% that gots game,and it doesnt matter if they do or not,impossible to find out or prove because they are going to make money regardless.

    Its the 75% or "largly most girls should not"that shouldnt wear an eyepatch.

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    God/dess GoldCoastGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    In the end it is personal preference (no matter what BGMnM says) IMHO.

    When I'm single - no visible ring... you get the "your boyfriend is lucky to have you" comments and questions... if you're married - visible ring (yet not flaunting it).. you get the "what does your husband think?" questions and comments... in the end.. you will get question regardless of you "marital status" hence I must disagree with BGMnM ....

    There are more than a few dancers who have fake stories to go with their stripper self.. just another way for them to distinguish work from "life". If you want to role-play that you're a married stripper when you are not... make sure you do so convincingly.

    Once again.. personal preference.

    I just realised.. you could apply this question to hair colour, length, what you wear and so forth... "Do you think being raven haired will hurt my sales?" "Do you think having short hair will hurt my sales?" "Do you think ...... will hurt or increase my sales?"

    In the end, it all depends on you....


    enter: E3167322D9 for your 10% discount

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    God/dess
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    I wear mine and don't have any problems. I find that the kind of guys who would ask aren't going to spend or spend much. When I was single the guys who asked didn't spend and that has not changed. It's up to you to decide what you want to tell them, but here's my short version of how this kind of customer goes regardless of your situation:

    1. The Single Girl:

    Customer: "So, do you have a boyfriend?"
    SG: "No. Not looking either."
    Customer: "Want to go out?"
    Mw/oR: "No. Want a dance?"
    Customer: "No."

    2. The Girl with an SO:

    Customer: "So, do you have a boyfriend?"
    Gw/SO: "Yup."
    Customer: "Want to go out?"
    Mw/oR: "No. Want a dance?"
    Customer: "No."

    3.Married, wearing rings:

    Customer: "Are you married?"
    MWR: "Yes."
    Customer: "Want to go out?"
    Mw/oR: "No. Want a dance?"
    Customer: "No."

    4. Married, not wearing rings:

    Customer: "Are you married?"
    Mw/oR: "No."
    Customer: "Want to go out?"
    Mw/oR: "No. Want a dance?"
    Customer: "No."

  12. #12
    Featured Member screaminpeachez's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Bgm!!???
    eyepatches!!

    hehehehe
    you crack me up!




    arrr matey lay yer hands off me booty or I'll make ye swab the poop-deck! yar!
    "may your work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, dance like no-one is watching, screw like your being filmed and drink like a true Irishman "--anonymous
    "GOD is LOVE, but get it in writing"- Gypsy Rose Lee

    http://www.myspace.com/screaminpeachez

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    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Susan--I have worn my rings and not worn my rings, worked when married, engaged, and single, and your post jsut about sums up my experience. Either they want a dance or they don't.


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    When you perform... you are out of yourself--larger and more potent, more beautiful. You are for minutes heroic. This is power. This is glory on earth. And it is yours, nightly.

    --Agnes De Mille

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    Featured Member Lizette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Quote Originally Posted by GoldCoastGirl
    There are more than a few dancers who have fake stories to go with their stripper self.. just another way for them to distinguish work from "life". If you want to role-play that you're a married stripper when you are not... make sure you do so convincingly.
    My thing is to be a mystery.

    Q: Did you go to college?
    A: Perhaps. Aren't you inquisitive?

    Q: Are you from here?
    A: I do love this city. Are you visiting?

    Q: What does your boyfriend think of your job?
    A: What makes you think I have a boyfriend?

    I don't give straightforward answers until I sell 5 dances and feel comfortable enough with the customer to know that he is not a jerk. If he spends an hour or two with me, I will tell him where I was born. I will give him truthful answers.

    I want to wear a ring to throw them off and hopefully eliminate a few of the jerks.

    Susan, you are right! The dialogue is dead-on hilarious.

  15. #15
    Featured Member Lizette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Quote Originally Posted by BigGreenMnM
    Gots no probs with that,every girl is different.

    If I were to tell 100 girls NOT to wear an eyepatch,5% of them would still make money if they did,right off the bat.
    They are the 5%.
    Then there is the 20% that gots game,and it doesnt matter if they do or not,impossible to find out or prove because they are going to make money regardless.

    Its the 75% or "largly most girls should not"that shouldnt wear an eyepatch.
    If an entertainer wears an eyepatch, she would probably need to change her game and say something about having an extra orafice to make the same money than she would w/o the yo-ho-ho.

    A wedding band will change my presentation. I'm just going to have to see how it will affect my sales and what I need to change in my pitch.

    Going around talking about a fake husband will scare money away, so I definitely will avoid doing it. That, and talking about my 7 kids, 4 baby's daddies, my dealer, and MAOI anti-depressants.

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    Banned BigGreenMnM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Quote Originally Posted by GoldCoastGirl
    In the end it is personal preference (no matter what BGMnM says) IMHO.

    In the end, it all depends on you....
    ehhhhhh
    Any stripper who does what i say 100% of the time is a nut case.

    In the end,GCG is correct,it all depends on the dancer.

    But for new girls,im just suggesting against the eye patch.
    (heheheheh pirate strippers avast!!)

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    Featured Member showgirlschloe's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    I never told any customers that I was married. It was just the way it worked for me. Personally, I just didn't want to cross that bridge with a customer. When I'm at work, it really doesn't matter if I'm married or not, I'm still not going home with a customer no matter how much money he has.

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    God/dess gypsy_girlchild's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    I don't wear mine for a number of reaons.
    1. it reduces my money conciderably, guys don't WANT to know. Not the ones that I deal with anyway. If a guy persists in wanting to see me outside the club, my answer is that I am engaged.
    2.thieves, if I accidentally dropped it, it's gone gone gone
    3. damage, I wore it for a little while and managed to lose a diamond and bend the frame
    it's not worth it. I know some girls still make money and haven't had any problems, but I know of many a guy that has pointed at a dancer and refused to get dances because he thought she was married.
    I wear a simple gold band with diamonds on that finger, it cost a fortune, but doesn't look it because the are tiny flawless diamonds, my guy and I decided that as long as I wore that band it was fine if I didn't wear the other. I still get questions about it, but not as many as I would with my real engagement ring.
    Please don't lick me, it tickles..



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    God/dess DancerWealth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    I've always been a big believer in the fact that you should wear the ring. Provided you wear a ring that might not be damaged like Gypsy said, I think it's a good idea. A long time ago I interviewd a lot of dancers who wore their rings and noticed that there was a definite difference between those that were helped by it and those who were hurt by it though.

    The ones who had negative results from wearing the ring, often approached their explanation of their marriage in a very negative tone. When a customer asks about their ring, they usually say something like, "Yeeeeeaaaahhh....I'm mar-ried" which by nature sounds very negative and very much like an excuse.

    Dancers who have a positive reaction from it are those who approach it from the standpoint that not only is she married, she is happily married. Her response sounds like, "Oh yeah, I'm married...happily married! My husband is the greatest guy on earth. After all, he let's me do this for a living which is a blast, so tell me about you!" See the difference?

    It reminds me of the movie Clear & Present Danger. When confronted with a scandal that the President of the United States had a friend murdered by drug runners because they were laundering money from the cartel, Harrison Ford's character gave him some awesome advice. Rather than deny their relationship, he said that the best approach was to go the other way. When asked if he knew these people, the President should say, "I didn't just know them, We were close friends." If asked if they were close friends, he should say, "No, we were life-long friends!" The point being that when you take away all possible types of resistence, there's nothing to go with.

    I also think the reason this works is because it adds to sincerity. Sincerity leads to trust, and trust leads to closing sales. Trust is one of the single most effective tools in making a sale. When you establish that trust quickly, then you begin to take away the resistence your customer has in buying from you. This leads to more lap dance sales.

    The ORIGINAL Stripper Sales School
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    Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle. ~Abraham Lincoln

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    Featured Member Lizette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Well, I wore the ring and made as much money as I would've any other day of the week. One man noticed it, I noticed HIS, and we began to laugh. He spent time with me and no one else.

  21. #21
    Senior Member usmcjess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    I am married and I did wear my wedding ring when my hubby was overseas. It really doesnt matter to guys. They will still ask you to go out and on vacations .. It gets annoying
    Im Retired...for now
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  22. #22
    Senior Member grinew127's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Let me remember now, I got married. Marriage (I guess you could call it that) went as far as three weeks. I was still working at my regular gig. To my regulars, heck, they hardly noticed. If you don't advertise, they won't notice. After that farce, I took it off.
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  23. #23
    Banned TerpsichoreToo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Yes, I wear my rings. I am not going to date or sleep with any customer and I feel wearing my rings makes that pretty clear to them.

    If my being married is a problem for a customer then he isn't the right customer for me anyway. I don't want to deal with their type of drama.

  24. #24
    God/dess
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    Guys want to feel that you are available. I could write a full page on this from my experience. Guys that continue to spend money on us regularly want to "think" they have a chance with us. All regulars will fade out at some point when they feel nothing is going to happen between us, but why jeopardize the money you could be making telling guys from the get go what they don't want to hear?

    Leave the wedding ring at home and "play" the game. You WILL lose money acting as if you're taken!!!

  25. #25
    Featured Member Lizette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Do you wear a wedding band?

    3 shifts of the wedding band and I have made $600+/night. I don't think my earnings are hurting at all! They are the same as always. No one notices it.

    The ring works to my advantage, I think. I'm about 30 and UNMARRIED. In my area, people assume that there is something wrong with me for being single. Wearing the ring kills all questions about why I don't have a man and if I am into women.
    Last edited by Lizette; 07-09-2005 at 03:25 AM.

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