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Thread: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

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    Default How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    I have recently started a platonic relationship with a dancer and I am a little suprised at how open she is with her children about her job. I am curious if this is the norm. The general consensus on another thread is that it is best not to tell your parents about dancing, but how much do you tell your young ones?

    If you don't mind (and I don't blame you if you do) please include your kid's ages and genders as that would obvioulsly make a diffrence.

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    God/dess MrChristopher's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    I'm just the Dj, but my 10 year old son asked me a couple of years ago why only girls worked at my work, since it was a gentleman's club. That was fun conversation.
    waffles are just pancakes with little squares on them.

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    Featured Member Destiny's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    Mom goes to work. So far my son, age 8, has been satisfied with that. Perhaps its being male, but he's not much of a talker. Actually, back when I was a waitress at a sports bar he visited me some so I assume he thinks that's what I do. I told him that where I work now, they only allows grown ups in.
    Dancing is wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. ~Christopher Morley, Kitty Foyle

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    Featured Member screaminpeachez's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    Quote Originally Posted by MrChristopher
    I'm just the Dj, but my 10 year old son asked me a couple of years ago why only girls worked at my work, since it was a gentleman's club. That was fun conversation.
    that is so cute!
    "may your work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, dance like no-one is watching, screw like your being filmed and drink like a true Irishman "--anonymous
    "GOD is LOVE, but get it in writing"- Gypsy Rose Lee

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    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    My son is 4. I have always been really open with him about everything, so he does know I am a dancer. Unlike Destiny's boy, my kid is a HUGE talker. He is constantly trying to go see me at work, ask me about it, and so on.

    He has also gone with me on costume-buying forrays at the thrift store, and I do occasionally talk about things that happened at work, in a G-rated style.

    A few wweeks ago he really surprised me. I was looking for a new job, and he said something like, "so you are going to get a new job, and then you are going to take your shirt off, and then you are going to toake you pants off!" YIKES! He was going through a getting-nakid-at-every-opportuity phase, so it was unclear whrther he really thought that is what I do at work, or if he was just assuming everybody wantse to get nakid like he does.


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    Veteran Member Yea's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    I and several dancer friends who have children of both sexes and various ages do not discuss this with our children. Some of us say waitress, hostess, cashier, bartender etc in a night club.


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    God/dess Sirona's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    I have three kids, aged 15, 13 and 11. Boy, girl, girl respectively. I told them that I am working in a strip club but have never specified that I dance. I'm sure the older two have put 2 and 2 together at this point. My mother was a go-go dancer back in the late 60's early 70' and i've had a few dancer friends in the past (i've only been dancing a little over a year) and always have raised my kids to see dancing as just another type of employment, a job, so they don't have any negative ideas towards it. They also are intelligent enough to realize people can be very ignorant. I don't worry one way or the other. I'm old enough that I don't really have anyone to answer to, so to speak, and I certainly don't feel embarassed or negative about my job.

    Wow, rambling, sorry, just got in from work.



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    Member Francois's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    My son is only 18 months old, obviously he is far too young to understand or know what I am about to do but I have every intention of raising him open minded.

    On that note, I had to laugh the other night because I was practicing some of the moves as I have not yet started and need to get as much as I can. I had just had a hot bath and threw on a pair of panties and a vest. Whilst I was doing my moves to the sounds of ELO...(Odd I know)... Pelvic thrusts and hips swaying and all that.. my son toddles up to me.. starts dancing in front of me as little ones do and then procedes to pull his arm out, grabs hold of my panties and starts pulling them down! I didnt know whether I should be worried or amused but obviously he hasnt seen mommy prancing around in undies very often and wanted to know what these interesting looking things were... hehe.

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    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    Quote Originally Posted by Sirona
    always have raised my kids to see dancing as just another type of employment, a job, so they don't have any negative ideas towards it. They also are intelligent enough to realize people can be very ignorant. I don't worry one way or the other. I'm old enough that I don't really have anyone to answer to, so to speak, and I certainly don't feel embarassed or negative about my job.
    YES! This is exactly how I feel. IF my son ever asks me about it, I will be able to say, "I danced when you were little because it allowed me to be home with you during the day."

    I can't see raising my kid in a situation wehre I have to lie about my job to him or anyone. That would be admitting that there is something wrong with my job, that I have to lie about it. I am straightforward with everyone, because I am trying to raise my child to be honest. He spends every waking moment with his Dad or me (no outside sitters at this point, and Grandma just could not handle him) and there is no way I could lie in front of him and not get found out. I also don't see the need to do so.

    For those of you who tell your kids you do something different, do you ever worry about getting found out? How careful are you? For example, do you not bring your costumes into the house to make sure nobody will go into your bag?

    I'm not being judgemental, just wondering. I hope my wording does not sound like I am judging anyone!


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    When you perform... you are out of yourself--larger and more potent, more beautiful. You are for minutes heroic. This is power. This is glory on earth. And it is yours, nightly.

    --Agnes De Mille

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    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    Quote Originally Posted by Francois
    My son is only 18 months old, obviously he is far too young to understand or know what I am about to do but I have every intention of raising him open minded.

    On that note, I had to laugh the other night because I was practicing some of the moves as I have not yet started and need to get as much as I can. I had just had a hot bath and threw on a pair of panties and a vest. Whilst I was doing my moves to the sounds of ELO...(Odd I know)... Pelvic thrusts and hips swaying and all that.. my son toddles up to me.. starts dancing in front of me as little ones do and then procedes to pull his arm out, grabs hold of my panties and starts pulling them down! I didnt know whether I should be worried or amused but obviously he hasnt seen mommy prancing around in undies very often and wanted to know what these interesting looking things were... hehe.
    This is a hoot! My friend and I joke that our kids have the "stripper gene" because they both have this COMPULSION to run around nakid. Mine will take all his clotes off and then climb up the spindles on the stairs and hang off like a tiny pole dancer. (Well, at least I won't have to send him any money when he is away in college )

    He also flipped out once b/c I cam home and fell asleep with pasties on. He thought my boobs were hurt and wanted to kiss them and make them all better . . . .

    I practice pole tricks at the playground b/c I currently don't have a stage in my bar. Kidlet thinks that is REALLY cool!


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    When you perform... you are out of yourself--larger and more potent, more beautiful. You are for minutes heroic. This is power. This is glory on earth. And it is yours, nightly.

    --Agnes De Mille

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    Featured Member Destiny's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    This is an old joke.

    Kid comes home from school and walks into the kitchen where Mom is fixing supper and says, "Mommy, what's sex?". Mom sighs inside, puts down her pan, takes the child into the living room and sits down with him on the couch. Over the next hour, Mom goes through the whole "birds and bees" thing. At the end the Mom says, "now honey, do you have any questions?". To which the boy nods and replies, "just one Mommy, do I check the M or F on this form I brought home from school?"

    The point is this, we grownups don't need to be in too big of a rush to share the gory details of adult issues with our children. Obviously what and when we tell our kids is a matter of individual preference. But remember, children are naturally inquisitive, though to different degrees. They are also naturally open about things. They will ask about what things that they feel are important to them. When they do, answer them honestly, but don't feel you have to give them more details than they are emotionally ready for.

    Sirona, I agree, your oldest kids probably have put two and two together. The fact that they don't ask any more about it probably means that they have all the information they want. I wouldn't worry about it.
    Dancing is wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. ~Christopher Morley, Kitty Foyle

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    Senior Member quoth_the_raven's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    I have a 6yr old boy and a 4(almost 5!!!)year old girl.

    My kids only know that mommy goes to work in a bar. They have been with me a few times when I've done HT pageants, so they probably think that's what I do all the time.

    Funny about the stripper gene...My BF and I both dancers-- his son is an extreme flirt and has a booty dance at 19mos.
    OTOH my daughter is a baby dominatrix ,she has a very dominant(bossy!) personality and is always trying to spank people. She also has a booty dance!

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    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    He thought my boobs were hurt and wanted to kiss them and make them all better . . . .
    Shit, I have to try that line sometime. That's gold, Jerry, gold!
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    Featured Member mercedez's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    The girls I work with tell there children they are a waitress......usually?

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    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    My stepson knows, is almost 11, and really likes to help me count out my tips! He is very facinated by the cash. He also thought that it was weird that people pay just to look at someone else naked, but I explained that I am performing a dance on a stage doing tricks on a pole and it is very exciting to watch.

    I have also told him that if anyone asks about my job (like his friends) to just tell them about my ebay work. He also likes to shop on ebay, so it is something that he can relate to a little better. It was kinda weird explaining why he can't talk about my job to his frineds, but in the end he did get it.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Veteran Member Gerina's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    The girls at work generally tell their kids the truth when asked, but for the most part the kids haven't asked. Like Destiny said, they only need to know what they're mature enough for. One of my coworkers addressed all of her 13 year-old girl's questions and then only concluded with it's not dirty, but some people think it could be. Just like if you're not Christian some people think you're dirty if you aren't. I thought that was cute enough for her to understand. She didn't need to go into gory descriptions of the guys or why she wouldn't want her daughter to aspire to it. She will when it comes up, or if she feels her daughter is mature enough.

    I get to have a fun discussion with my 16 year-old brother. Just yesterday he asked me if I work in a club like the one on "Married With Children". I was stunned, since I wasn't planning to tell him until he was over 18, and played dumb. My mom was in the room with him, which is why I think he didn't press it further (she wouldn't get the reference). I'm going to have to call him back and be frank, since he is mature enough to know what "the nudie bar" is.
    ...and the day came, when the risk it took to remain closed in a bud became worse than the risk it took to blossom.

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    Veteran Member Yea's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    Quote Originally Posted by colleen

    For those of you who tell your kids you do something different, do you ever worry about getting found out? How careful are you? For example, do you not bring your costumes into the house to make sure nobody will go into your bag?
    Hey Colleen, yes I do personally worry about it although I feel its best at this time (just a child) to not complicate growing up with “confusion over mommy’s profession…

    I don’t feel its necessary to concern my child with how I pay the bills, what “society would have to say, also the feeling of “hiding from others what I do etc.. For my child in particular I feel it is best to simply be a child and preserve innocence .. Once its gone, it never returns…

    I am not judging anyone who tells their child or saying I disagree with it.. I just do what I feel is best for mine.


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    Veteran Member Yea's Avatar
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    Default Re: How much do you tell you kids about danceing?

    Id also like to add, I see no Benefit to a young child having this information about their mother.... of course one could argue “it could empower them from social stigmas”


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