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Thread: Help with addiction!

  1. #1
    Curious Guest Sledge's Avatar
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    Default Help with addiction!

    Hey people,

    I'm new here, but figured this would be a good place to ask for some serious advice. My father is going through a midlife crisis and has gotten into this habit of spending way more then he makes at a local club. There are a few dancers there that have really been taking him for a ride (1,500 bucks per night on average). This has been going on for almost 6 months he's really getting my family into a lot of debt. My mom says that he keeps promising to stop and saying that he'll put the credit card away, but then 5 days later he'll do the exact same thing. Unfortunately I can't talk to him about it directly b/c then he'd know my mom told me, and that could lead to a divorce. She's too passive to really make a strong intervention though.

    So, my question is, how do you cure somebody from an exotic dancing addiction? Is there any information, documentaries, or websites out there that would be useful? Do you girls see this stuff often???

    -Sledge

  2. #2
    Senior Member usmcjess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with addiction!

    If she is on the cards, tell her to cancel them. Put a strict limit on the bank accounts. No advice here really. I hope he stops for you moms sake
    Im Retired...for now
    http://www.myspace.com/usmcjess

  3. #3
    tampafldancer
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    Default Re: Help with addiction!

    oh man! i had a customer in this exact same postion except he was looking at bankrupcy. When i told him that maybe he should come to the clubs less or rethink it...

    He just started spending his money on a different girl in the club!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Why dont you tell your dad that you know and it is nothing to be ashamed of. But he needs to tone it down because you want to be able to go to college w/out any worries, etc?
    Pull his heart strings and ask your mom to PULL HIS CREDIT CARD!

  4. #4
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    Default Re: Help with addiction!

    Some professionals would place this under the "sex addict" category. There are actual 12 step groups, just like AA or NA for sex addicts. It covers not only addiction to physical sex, but also porn addiction, which is rampant. If you do an internet search for sexual addiction recovery groups, like SA (Sexaholics Anon) you'll find lots of resources.

    Unfortunately for families like yours, we see this all the time. I had a guy last week tell me he was "actually out getting orange juice"....So yea, lots of guys can't seem to stay out of the clubs, even when it causes major financial/relationship issues.

  5. #5
    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with addiction!

    He needs counciling and maybe even medical help if it is depression that is causing his addiction. There are 12 step programs like mentioned above, but I think that a real Dr. would be able to help more.

    There is a chemical reaction in the brain that causes non-drug addictions (gambling, shopping, porn, etc.). the brain releases too much of a chemical (dopamine??) that heightens pleasure sensations. It is very similar to doing drugs for these people. There are medicines on the market that help to regulate the brain chemicals to a more normal level. If your dad is going through a very tough time in his life, he may really need this help.

    If he is spending $1500 a day on dancers (and he's not filthy rich) then this is really self destructive behavior. Maybe check out websites for families of addicts. They would probably know better then we will as to how to help your dad.

    take care, Paris Love


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Veteran Member KennedyWinters's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with addiction!

    Maybe this is out of line for me to say: But I don't see how you talking to him directly would be bad. You say then he'll know your mom told you and that could lead to a divorce....I still think you need to bring up the issue if she is too passive. Cry for him, let him see that this is affecting you and if it were just some light entertainment with the buddies every once in a while you'd never have even been told about it. But it's gotten to be a big deal now and serious reform is in order if the family is going to survive. I don't know- but if your dad were going to divorce your mom I doubt it would be for that reason. None of this is your fault.

  7. #7
    Cally
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    Default Re: Help with addiction!

    Psst...this thread is a year old...

  8. #8
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    Default Re: Help with addiction!

    ^^^lMAO^^^^^

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    Veteran Member casaubon1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with addiction!

    Just proof that what is really addictive here is SW.

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    God/dess KamrynAnne's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help with addiction!

    i think its funny as hell when people bring up old threads like this...

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