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Thread: Please help!

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    Veteran Member Lovespell's Avatar
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    Default Please help!

    To make a long story short, I need some serious help, advice, tips, anything. I'm not making money stripping. I did, in the beginning, but I've been dancing for a few months, and instead of getting better, it's getting worse!

    The earning potential at my club is a thousand a night on the weekends. Many girls bring that home, even when their regulars aren't there. But I can't seem to bring that much in!

    Last night I worked an 11 hour shift and I brought home only $193! On a Saturday! It is really starting to affect me, not only finacially, but mentally as well. When you have a ton of bads night in a row, it starts to get really discouraging.

    I work anywhere from 1 to 3 days a week, so I'm not overworked or burnt out. And I really do love my job! I love dressing up, I love being on stage, I love chatting with the guys.

    I get tons of comments on how funny and smart and beautiful I am, and how my body is so great and my stage set was so hot blah blah blah. But they aren't spending money!

    I've think I've read the Hustle Hut a million times over, but I must be missing something, because even when I apply some of the stuff, it still isn't working.

    Please, I need some help. I'm starting to feel desperate. I need a stragety or a plan, or whatever. SOMETHING. I'm starting to feel like there's something wrong with me. I know you shouldn't take everything personally in this job, but when a bad night turns to months, there has to be SOMETHING wrong.

    I go to work in a few hours and am really dreading it. I've tried new make up, new outfits, new music and nothing so far.

    So please HELP!

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    God/dess DancerWealth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    I can totally understand your frustration and how you feel just how daunting this can be. So let's start with a long deep breath and let it out. Okay, now let's start working.

    The challenge most people have when they are in your situation is they feel as though nothing is working and everything is failing. As a result, you want to try and fix 20 thins instead of working on just a few of the basics first and then start to refine the issues that are causing you some difficulty. So, let's start there.

    If your sales are noticable weak, let's start to figure out why. Obviously you are getting some resistence to your conversation and closing of sales to the guys in your club. So what I want you to post the top three forms of resistance you get or rejections you hear. Just three. I want you to think really hard on this too. Let's get you to address your top three issues and then we can start working on them.

    The ORIGINAL Stripper Sales School
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    Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle. ~Abraham Lincoln

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    Veteran Member Lovespell's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    Hmmm, I think the top three rejections are:

    1. Maybe later'
    2. I've already had or just had a dance/dances
    3. Not tonight (from the guys that come in a lot)

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    Default Re: Please help!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovespell
    To make a long story short, I need some serious help, advice, tips, anything. I'm not making money stripping. I did, in the beginning, but I've been dancing for a few months, and instead of getting better, it's getting worse!

    So please HELP!
    Ok, I'm going to take this from a different tack from DW. I'm a male custy, but I've got several OTC friendships with dancers, so I get to see things from both sides of the fence.

    First bit of advice - begin to see yourself through a male customer's eyes. You're a dancer, I'm a customer - we see things differently. Now most male custy's will never get to know a dancer OTC, so they come into a SC with a set of illusions, and they leave with those illusions intact. What are those illusions:

    (a) You get a sexual kick out of what you do.
    (b) You find him, (the customer), attractive.
    (c) If he approaches you in the right way, he'll get your phone number.

    To sell dances you've got to conform to the guy's illusions.

    Now I know it's not easy. Most custy's are older than you, not attractive to you, may be crude or handsy. Think of yourself as an actress - your job is to fulfll the guy's fantasies: if you do you'll make money.

    So repeat after me:

    (a) You love showing off your body.
    (b) Depending on the guy's age, you are attracted to more mature men, or it's nice to dance for guys of your own age.
    (c) Occasionally you do see guy's outside the club, but it's only regular's you've known for some time, (and who've spend a fair bit of money on you).

    I think frankly this is part of the explanation as to why you made money at the start: you had a newbies' sense of fun about what you were doing. That communicated itself to customers as exhibisionism - and you fulfilled one of their three fantasies. Later, as dancing became more of a job, you lost some of that sense of fun and earnings dropped accordingly.

    (Same thing happened to me - I got to know dancers as friends, got to know the realities of the job - and the erotic simili I got from watching dropped accordingly.)

    I don't think your problem is your figure, your costume, your dancing skills, or anything like that. I think it's your hustle - you're not living up to their stereotype of a dancer.

    And that brings me back to my original comment - learn to see yourself through a male customer's eyes and behave accordingly. Sure, you know the realities of the job - but most of your customers won't.

    So, final bit of advice: look at the girl's who are sucessful in your club. Are they:

    (a) Sitting next to men in a way that encourages their custy's to look down their cleavage or stare at their legs: i.e. do they give the impression they like their custy's to look?
    (b) Very flirtatious, no matter how attractive the customer really is to them?
    (c) Giving the impression they might see their custy's OTC?

    Like I said, you've got to be an actress - to earn $$$ you need to know the right lines!

    Phil.

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    Featured Member Destiny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovespell
    ... Please, I need some help. I'm starting to feel desperate...
    Perhaps this desperation is coming through? Remember, guys want what other guys want. Perhaps you seem too availible? I don't know, just tossing out ideas.
    Dancing is wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. ~Christopher Morley, Kitty Foyle

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    Default Re: Please help!

    Yea I agree^^^...sometimes I think that they can smell desperation.
    When Im having a bad night or I think that I wont make as much...I just keep walking around and talking to guys even if Ive talked to them before Ill come by and say hi really quick.
    Doesnt sound like youre burnt out though; thats a good thing.

    You seriously need to up those sales skills. Of course you know that they guys that always come in either buy dances or not...some guys just like to loaf around the nudity and not tip for the life of them. When Im bored I watch the other girls' techniques and try to differ it from them just to make me different.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



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    Newbie Ravensart's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    The only thing I do is plan on having fun. If I'm having fun the money comes. For me anyway.

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    Default Re: Please help!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovespell
    Hmmm, I think the top three rejections are:

    1. Maybe later'
    2. I've already had or just had a dance/dances
    3. Not tonight (from the guys that come in a lot)
    Everyone in here is really right on the money. Even Ravensart is right...stop thinking of this as "work" to begin with. Desperation, stress and work anxiety will all show through to your customers. Guys want someone who WANTS to do a dance for them, not someone who HAS to do a dance for them. Big difference. So let's take a look at your list:

    "Mabye later" in your book should be interpreted as, "I don't want a dance now, I want one later" and call your customers to the matt on this one. Sometimes it's a blow-off, but other times it really is not. When they say this, hold them to it. Leave, and come back later. When you do leave though, drop your name. Say, "No problem. My name is (insert name here) so I'll check back with you in a little while." When 4 or 5 minutes go by, come back. Say, "Hi guys, remember me? (Name)? Well, you said you wanted me to return, so here I am!" and then ask to sit down. On to #2;

    "I just got a dance." This is pure crap when coming from a customer. It's a stupid blow-off. If he just got a dance, and he doesn't want any more, then why is he still sitting in the club? It's a nonsensical answer. SO, again, hold them to it. "Oh, okay, well since you are still in the club though, I'm curious, if not now, when?" They'll probably say something like, "Oh, I don't know...just not right now...maybe later." When you here this, refer to the previous paragraph.

    As far as your third item, it's simply a brush-off. One pattern I noticed with your list though was that all three items showed that you are getting resistance to your closing of the sale, not any other part of the introduction, conversation, etc. So it's your close that needs some work. Understanding that, let's back up one step. Let me know what you do from the moment you ask permission to sit down to when you close the sale. Where are you sitting relative to your customer? How do you ask permission to sit down? How do you introduce yourself? What is a typical conversation like when you are talking with your customer? Do you take control of the conversation or do you let the customer do that? What are you saying when you finally closing the sale? There is a philosophy in sales that I personally subscribe to a lot. It is that if you hear "no" a lot from your customers, the reason is because you are a fun person to say "no" to. So now, we need to start turning you into a person who's fun to say "yes" to.

    The ORIGINAL Stripper Sales School
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    Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle. ~Abraham Lincoln

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    Default Re: Please help!

    When 4 or 5 minutes go by, come back.
    Huh? Are you serious? Isn't that being a bit....annoying? I'd say like 20 minutes later, minimum!!

    Feature costumes for sale!

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    God/dess DancerWealth's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    It depends on how busy the club is Scarlet. 20 minutes later they could be gone, they could have had five other dancers come by (and bought from them), etc. I would say the amount of time depends on the activity in the club of course. Keep in mind in a SC, a LOT of things can happen in five minutes in some clubs.

    The ORIGINAL Stripper Sales School
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    Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle. ~Abraham Lincoln

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    Default Re: Please help!

    ^^ True if its busy I come back in less than 10 min just to hit em up again. Depends on how busy it is and the dancer:customer ratio.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



  12. #12
    Featured Member Destiny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    I agree with Scarlett, wait at least 20 minutes before coming back. There is a difference between persistent and being annoying. If less than 5 minutes after you leave he's getting dances from another girl, then he wasn't interested in you to begin with.
    Dancing is wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. ~Christopher Morley, Kitty Foyle

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    Veteran Member Lovespell's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    Thanks for all of the info and advice everyone. I just got back from work, and it was a good shift. I didn't rake in a ton of money, but it was a low key night and I was feeling very relaxed and in a good mood. I think the super busy nights get me too stressed, and it works against me. I made $235, and it was very very slow. But most of all the night FELT good.


    DancerWealth, as for conversation, it kind of varies. There are some guys, for the life of me, I can not warm up to or get them to open up. I know even when asking if they want a dance, they will say no. And they do.

    And then there are others, like tonight, where I swear I can almost make them fall in love with me! I like those ones, because it's a fun game to do, and I feel powerful and confident.

    Okay, from step one this is how it goes:

    If I'm on stage, I will notice who tips a lot or tips big. I will also make eye contact OUTSIDE the tip rail, to try to feel out who else might be interested. Those are the ones I will approach first. I will smile and touch the back of his neck, and then crouch down to his level. I will introduce myself, shake his hand. Ask him how he's doing. During this time I will very lightly brush my upper body/chest against his arm and ask him if I can join him. Most say yes, so I will sit down to the chair close to him, or push it closer. I'll turn my body towards him and kind of lean in. I'll ask him where he's from, what he likes to do for fun, wether or not he likes his job (but never ask exactly WHAT he does or how much money he makes, usually if I ask wether he likes his job, he'll tell me all of that without me asking. if he doesn't, I move on to a different subject)

    Usually those 3 questions will lead into genuine conversation. I smile, make eye contact, brush up against him. Sometimes I will drop sexy comments, or nudge the conversation in that direction, but I never talk nasty. I'm just not comfortable with that. I can talk ABOUT sex, and BE sexy about it, but I can't bring myself to sit on a guys lap and whisper nasty things into a guys ear like some of the girls do.

    I will then make eye contact, lean forward and say coyly "Can I tempt you with a dance?"

    They say, yes or no.

    This whole thing can take anywhere from 3-15 minutes, depending on the guy.

    It works like a charm on some, but not on others. Sometimes I feel like some guys have made up their minds before I've even introduced myself.

    So that's what I do, more or less. I'm definitly open to suggestions.

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    God/dess Malibu's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    Quote Originally Posted by Lovespell
    Hmmm, I think the top three rejections are:

    1. Maybe later'
    2. I've already had or just had a dance/dances
    3. Not tonight (from the guys that come in a lot)
    Lovespell, maybe you are just being too nice. And as far as I've learnt, nice does not pay the bills and guys will often use these lines to easily weed out the weak girls. You've got to learn to confront those stupid reactions, they are all cop-outs. I saw a serious increase in my earnings as soon as I changed my attitude and became a little more confrontational.

    Sometimes when I get the responses you give, I will just walk away; there are times when they are not worth the bother. But most of the time, I challenge them and am finding that my tactics either get them to change their minds on the spot or get them to pursue me later on that night.

    In reply to 'maybe later', I might just say ''How about now? There's no point in wasting valuable time when you've got the present to enjoy''

    In reply to 'I've already had dances', I might say ''So now you've had your starter, you should be hungry for the main course'' or something along those lines.

    A 'not tonight' brush-off is the worst. I will normally say ''You didn't come all the way out here and pay the admission to act like you don't want semi-naked ladies come after you. While you here, let's make the night worthwhile''.

    On top of that, it's not always the lines I use, it's the way I say them! I smirk and lean in, I will stroke the back of their neck or play with their hair. I will press my body against theirs, make sure they know of what they will possibly pass up if they are thinking of rejecting me. Make yourself desirable. If they say no, you can go with the hard sell and start talking about your attributes, how they would be silly to pass you up and up the contact, talk into their ear and squeeze their arm. If they still say no, I will literally just walk away. I won't waste an ounce more of my precious time and sometimes guys hate that.

    Play it cool. It can work well for you if you adopt the right style.
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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    Yes they can smell desperation from a mile away. When you don't care whether they buy from you or not, they seem to want you more! It's weird, but the way it goes. When you're running around busy with other guys, suddenly they all seem to want you. They never want the girl who can't sell a dance - they think she's no good or something

    I know it's easier said than done, but try getting your mind off of making money (or the lack of) and just try to have fun. Look at yourself and realize what a hottie you are. Get it in your head that if one guy doesn't buy, another will. When you believe it, your body language, expression, attitude will change and it works. Confidence is attractive.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Member shaz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    change clubs to make it fresh

    everything that has been said is all in the name of "being a fresh dancer"

    if you are "in a rutt" at your club then the guys wont pay for your time....
    they want the "fun, playful, sexy, horny etc" kinds of girls - not the ones that "dragged their ass there, to make their weekly income"

    fake it

    have a few drinks to freshen up (if you are a happy drunk)
    have a few red bulls to liven up (if you are caffine sensitive)
    have a few drinks with friends prior to start time (if that makes you happy)
    have sex with your boyfriend (if that puts you on a high)

    do whatever it takes to make you that fun desirable person - not the mopey "i'm not making money" one the guys hate so much


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    Veteran Member Lovespell's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    It's funny, because I know the girls your talking about. The ones that look incredibly bored, like they don't want to be there.

    I'm not that girl! Sometimes for a few minutes in the dressing room, but never ever ever on stage ( I LOVE being on stage) and NEVER on the floor.

    Unless I'm giving vibes that I'm not aware of.

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    Featured Member Destiny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette
    Yes they can smell desperation from a mile away. When you don't care whether they buy from you or not, they seem to want you more! It's weird, but the way it goes. When you're running around busy with other guys, suddenly they all seem to want you. They never want the girl who can't sell a dance - they think she's no good or something

    I know it's easier said than done, but try getting your mind off of making money (or the lack of) and just try to have fun. Look at yourself and realize what a hottie you are. Get it in your head that if one guy doesn't buy, another will. When you believe it, your body language, expression, attitude will change and it works. Confidence is attractive.
    Bridgette's advice is exactly right here! When I first started, I would set goals for myself. Maybe my goal was to sell 10 dances in the first 4 hours. What I found was that if I made my goal and sold 10 dances in the first 4 hours I would often sell 8 dances in the next two hours! Why? I'm pretty sure it was that after making my goal, I didn't seem as desperate, seemed more confident, and since I felt good about myself, I gave that feeling off to the guys.

    If at all possbile, never sit at the bar. You will look bored and unattractive. Remember guys want what other guys want! Don't act like a stuck-up bitch. But always be on your way to speak to someone, need to say hi to someone, take care of something etc. Even if I have a regular come in, I will sometimes excuse myself for a moment to say hi to someone else I know. Why? Because it makes my regular feel good to have a girl that he thinks someone else wants sitting with him.

    Lastly, don't take it personal. Most guys are looking for a girl with, "it". Nobody but the guy himself knows what the hell "it" is. But if you don't have "it", all the cute lines in the world are not likely to convince him to buy. Most guys decide within a couple of minutes if you have "it" or not and whether or not they are going to get a dance. Better to move on.
    Dancing is wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. ~Christopher Morley, Kitty Foyle

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    Yes it's the vibes. You project it whether you mean to or not. Your post indicates this. You're getting more and more frustrated about not making money and, whether you try to put on a good show or not, it's apparently projecting anyway. It's hard to not do it...

    Gotta get the confidence up. It's really the only thing that will help as far as I can see. The above suggestion about changing clubs is good too. Sometimes a simple change of scenery does a world of good!

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    God/dess verfolgung's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    Quote Originally Posted by scarlett_vancouver
    Huh? Are you serious? Isn't that being a bit....annoying? I'd say like 20 minutes later, minimum!!
    Quote Originally Posted by DancerWealth
    It depends on how busy the club is Scarlet. 20 minutes later they could be gone, they could have had five other dancers come by (and bought from them), etc. I would say the amount of time depends on the activity in the club of course. Keep in mind in a SC, a LOT of things can happen in five minutes in some clubs.
    The "maybe later" is one of the more misunderstood, confusing and potentially frustrating lines between dancers and customers. 1) Sometimes customers who don't know better think it's a more polite decline then an outright "no"; 2) Sometimes they actually do mean maybe later, the dancer returns and all is good; 3) Sometimes the cutomer means maybe later; the dancer takes it as a blow off, and the customer is left wondering why she never came back, especially if she said she would return when he said "maybe later."

    As is apparent from the various responses "later" can mean different things to different people. Instead of being ambiguous why not try to set some kind of informal time? Maybe ask when he might think he'd like some company, or set an arbitrary time line like, "Well I'm gonna be up on stage in a bit, I'll come back to check on you when I'm done alright! See you soon!" That way the customer knows when to expect your return, and won't be left wondering where you went if he expected you to come back in 5 min, and you wait for 20 min to return.

    If you wish to play the "I'm in demand and better get while you can card", then you could use a line like, "Well I'm usually very busy, but if I have a moment I'll try to check in with you." At least this way he can't be disappointed when if you don't get back to him and your off talking to several other customers. Now it was made clear that it was his loss and he should have taken the opportunity when he had the chance, so as to lessen the likelyhood of feeling slighted in some way.
    If you can't win. Make the fellow in front of you break the record.


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    Default Re: Please help!

    All this advice is excellent. It is soooo true about making your goal in the beginning of the night ,so you can have more confidence for the rest of the night. As a matter of fact, as soon as i get my first dance of the night,I am already more confident.Before that first dance, I always have more of the butterfly stomach feeling. (Nervous)
    Also, to hype myself up right before I approached a customer, I would think of something I am REALLY looking forward too. It gave me that happy tingling feeling and i felt charged up. An example would be when I was with a new boyfriend at the time. I would think of seeing him after work, right before I was about to start my hustle. It seemed to work.

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    Default Re: Please help!

    If they say 'maybe later', sometimes it's a good idea to ask them if they would like you to come back. Usually, if they're interested, they'll respond in the affirmative.

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    Default Re: Please help!

    I got in a terrible rut a few months after i first started. it was difficult for me to sell a $15.00 nude contact dance, and even moreso to get good tips from the guys. It was in a hell-hole club that i finally left in pursuit of ANYTHING else. The next place I worked was an upscale pastie club with NO CONTACT (except in the VIP room). While the cilentale was different, I ended up being able to sell a LOT better, even to the same blue-collar and college kid types. It was just the atmosphere that changed my perception of my job and money.

    At the old club I felt like I had to SELL myself for $15.00, and at the new club I felt much more glamourous and beautiful and I thought the guys were LUCKY to get an airdance from me at $20.00 a pop. Anyways, I'm not saying to change your club or anything about your situation--just the way you look at it. When you consider yourself a lot more worthwhile (expensive) then it's easy to convince the guys of that.

    to sell ice to an eskimo you have to believe your ice is better than the ice they already have. and it is. confidence is basically what everyone was saying the whole time, but I just figured it out from a different angle.

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    Featured Member Destiny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Please help!

    Quote Originally Posted by Miss420
    If they say 'maybe later', sometimes it's a good idea to ask them if they would like you to come back. Usually, if they're interested, they'll respond in the affirmative.
    Good tip!
    Dancing is wonderful training for girls, it's the first way you learn to guess what a man is going to do before he does it. ~Christopher Morley, Kitty Foyle

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    Default Re: Please help!

    A SENSE OF OBLIGATION must be put in the customers mind to buy dances and tip on stage.

    That is why the same customers who patronized the modest club rarely bought dances even though contact was better, but bought air dances at the more posh club for $5 more.

    The clubowner is usually to blame for this. A club must have high MOMENTUM. Let's take Bridgette's club for example. $10 dances, usually high traffic and very popular. Every guy is being approached by 4-5 girls per song for table dances, the bouncers seat EVERY customer, as they know that by having every customer seated they are more approachable, and many times when a customer orders a drink he gets a 2 for one. That keeps them in the club longer. Plus during every song guys all around every customer are getting dances. So most guys will buy dances to "fit in".

    Customers of all kinds want to go with the flow and not be the only one not spending so they will. The same goes for stage in certain clubs. If everyone is sitting around the tip rails then guys don't want to be the only ones sitting at tables.

    People want to fit in. That is why guys don't want to be the only one in the club or the only one getting dances. If you work in a club where girls don't have much hustle, and dances aren't being sold like hotcakes, it is harder to sell them.

    So if a club isn't run with a lot of momentum which puts a sense of obligation in the customers to spend money on dances, cash flow will be slower or require more persistence and persuasion to get.

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