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Thread: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

  1. #26
    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus
    I just noticed
    he asked for DANCER advice. And got an answer from 1 dancer.

    Emily must be in a good mood LOL

    Seriously, I dont know what to tell the thread originator. Dancers are at the club to work and make a living. Some guys go nutzo over the women and think the fantasy is real Theres no SC school to attend other than the one of hard knocks. I went from newbie to regular to PL to RIL all the while spending thousands of dollars. Fortunately I could afford such an expensive school Today, praise the lord and pass the hat, I understand what is what. It makes it a whole lot more fun

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  2. #27
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    Three letter for this guy:

    R I L

    we know you're unsure if we're serious, so if we are serious, we make damned sure you know it. if you have to ask yourself if she really likes you, she doesn't. She probably doesn't want any customer "friends", especially if she already has a boyfriend.
    Amen. Dancers have zero problem letting you know when they're interested in OTC activity of any kind.

    <S> Emily
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  3. #28
    Veteran Member Clark's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    I only have one OTC dancer friend, and that's only because we knew each other before she got hired, but here's the one bit of advice I'd give you: Don't try to stop getting dances because you respect her. That only tells her you don't respect her job.

  4. #29
    Senior Member Luke34's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    Quote Originally Posted by Clark
    the one bit of advice I'd give you: Don't try to stop getting dances because you respect her. That only tells her you don't respect her job.
    I agree with Clark...and the question that follows is "Will you expect her to stop dancing if she wants to pursue a relationship with you ?"

    A strip club is about being entertained and having fun. Getting serious is the opposite of fun.

    Having said that most of us at some stage have wanted to believe the fantasy... Good luck.

  5. #30
    Veteran Member laplover69's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    I always tell a dancer that I have sincere feelings for that I would prefer to spend time and money on her in another environment and that she means more to me than a "paid grope", some have appreciated this, and some I continue to get paid high quality lappers from. The dancers that I don't get laps from spend time with me OTC (although not usually sexual in nature, but it has happened), the dancers i do get lappers from remain just ITC (inside the club) with very little personal in BUSINESS.. Quite a paradox at times.

  6. #31
    Veteran Member laplover69's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    By the way, I have become "good friends" with a few of the dancers I have received high quality lappers from. I use to take her back and forth to work and spend a lot of money on her inside and outside the club. Far more often than not, the "sex aspect" remained inside the club at a BUSINESS level, although we do have mutual personal feelings for each other now as "friends" and talk often...

  7. #32
    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    I'm not going to read through this entire thread at all the answers...but, I did want to say about you going into the club without spending money...BAD IDEA. Not only are you "wasting her time", you are wasting the time of other dancers and taking up space that a paying customer could occupy.

    I think, personally, what you need to do is just stop going to the club. If you do not have the financial resources in which to keep going, don't go. She's not your friend...she's using that term to keep you coming back. If she had any interest in you at all...you would know.

    Save yourself the trouble and just write this off as a lesson learned.

  8. #33
    Veteran Member Nina's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    Quote Originally Posted by Caelum
    I'm not so sure a girl would want to go out with a guy who pays her for PDs at a club, so my true reason for thinking about having this conversation with her is to try to put myself in better standing with her in case she becomes single soon.
    If you used to give me money, and then you stopped giving me money to change our relationship you'd be cut off.
    I'd think you were using the money for leverage as in --- if you don't start dating me I'm going to cut off the cash flow.
    Sexy, Swarovski Stripper jewelry, OOAK, and DIY clothing


    "Acceptance is right. Kindness is right. Love is right. I pray, right now, that we're moving into a kinder time when prejudice is overcome by understanding; when narrow-mindedness, and narrow-minded bigotry is overwhelmed by open-hearted empathy; when the pain of judgmentalism is replaced by the purity of love"
    Janet Jackson

  9. #34
    God/dess Farrah_Holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    My advice Caelum is to just ask her and hope she is being completely honest with you when you get your answer.
    Personally I don't date customers,although I do consider many of them to be true friends.
    I'm there to make money and I view meeting worth while custys as one of the perks of my job. Having said that, several of my dancer friends use stripclubs as not only as place to make money but,as a date service too. All of us dancers are different and we have different goals for ourselves. So who is to say what she REALLY wants from you except her.
    My new love...is me !

    Even the greatest authority does not, ultimately, know you as you know yourself.
    Jhuka

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  10. #35
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    My honest advice to Caelum is very simple, and it applies to most male/female situations inside or outside a club, anywhere under most any circumstances, with almost any woman.

    Apparently you've been around this girl for quite some time. In the non-club time you've spent with her, has she ever come right at you, put her arms around you, and kissed you / started any sexual activity without you having to make any move on your own? If NOT, I'm sorry to say Caelum, but she's probably not interested in the type of relationship I think you're hoping for. ALSO, does SHE regularly call YOU up to go to a movie, have dinner, go to the park, have a beer, whatever? If NOT, then again, I doubt even an honest non-club related friendship exists. I could be wrong, but that's my opinion.

    I seems like you're a good guy that would really be a good boyfriend / friend to someone. I'd take this one "off the hook" and throw another line out. Only my opinion. Best of luck...

  11. #36
    Veteran Member laplover69's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    Good answers Chevalier... You never really know for sure whats inside a dancers or customers heart, obviously some dancers have "trust" issues with customers and visa versa, the "dancer-customer relationships" inside or outside the clubs are just more ampliified/complex than that of normal relationships... Cheers

  12. #37
    Veteran Member infra-red's Avatar
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    Default Re: Advice from dancers needed: befriending a dancer

    Run away.......run away!

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