hey well i
hey well i
Last edited by emily1015; 10-27-2008 at 11:49 AM.
There are times when we all don't like our jobs. I felt like I was making my punk ass boss rich while I was doing all the work.
I know a girl who does fully nude air dances - no lapping - no touching. I told her there is nothing different in what you are doing than what someone can see in an R rated movie these days.
If actresses are whore's - well - that is probably a whole nother thread.
If the issue is "I am fucking with other people's heads to make money" ... which usually is the real guilt that sneaks in... I don't have the answer to that other than to stay away from those who are easily taken in.





If at any point I feel like a whore I will leave for the day or take some time off....or quit if it was really bad. Not everyone is comfortable with dancing.
Why do you feel like a whore sometimes?
you live like an ivy vine
you can only survive by clinging onto trees
that's your flaw
put down some roots so you can stand on your own
-Kenpachi
I dunno I guess cause i'm dancing and acting sexy for someone other than my boyfriend. Under normal circumstances I would never do that in real life. I just do it cause it's part of the job.



i think that it's a matter of how you perceive being a "whore." i'm an adult actress. i have yet to start feeling like a whore for doing this. but then again, i'm a feminist and i've read volumes and volumes of sex-positive, pro-sex work literature.
look into the work of annie sprinkle. she has this piece called "whores are my heroes" which gives 40 reasons why "whores" are awesome. i have it hanging on my bedroom wall.
read it here.




Maybe you feel like that because you're still new to the business.Give it some time,and see how you feel about it later.But if after a while you still feel the same way,maybe it's not the right business for you,or maybe you should try cocktailing at the same club.I hope you start feeling better about it because it's a great industry.
Yea, I mean, you decided to get the job because there was something you liked about it, right?After my first day, I felt dirty. But I went to work the next day and never had that problem again! I know I don't know you, but I dont' think you would have gone through all the work to find a super clean club or even made this thread if you were a whore.
It's just cuz it's so new... and it definately isn't socially acceptable... But this IS America... I love my job because I know I wouldn't have it if I had a stick up my butt... You know what i mean?
If you think school is hard, try being stupid.





I've never felt like a whore and I've danced for 10 years. Perhaps I'm wrong, but I tend to think if anyone feels like a whore (and isn't comfortable with that) for doing this, they probably shouldn't be doing it at all. As much as we say here that it's just a job, it's still not like a regular job and carries a whole set of issues most people aren't cut out for dealing with. If you're not totally comfortable with this business, it can wreak havoc on you mentally and emotionally - and IMO that risk isn't worth any amount of money.





I don't feel like a whore but there was one time where I let someone do more than they should (I was attracted to them, they were spending a TON of money and they were sweet) and I felt dirty afterwards. I know I shouldn't have let it happen. But it happened. And now that he's a regular I'm afraid he'll expect it from me everytime now. ;-;
But no, I've never felt like a 'whore' perse. Just a little dirty sometimes. And that's all my fault. I don't feel bad if I do anything within the confines of club rules (and we don't allow extras either, I could've been fired had they found out).
In the few times I have danced I haven't felt like a whore but I sort of feel paranoid about someone from my day job seeing me. I guess it shouldn't matter but I don't want to lose creditibility on my day job and I feel like if certain people knew I danced they would think less of me. I'm curious what club you are at that is bikini and good money. The ones I've tried so far I didn't do very well but part of that is becuase I'm not the best hustler.
I like to think of stripping as performance art. That's what it is legally/technically anyways. Also, sexuality is one of the most basic of human instincts. Important to society in many different ways in all it's forms. I simply can't think of it negatively given how much of a necessity it is on the physiological, social and psychological level.
The definition of a real prostitute I've always kept in my mind, is if some form of sexual satisfaction is given to your customer by some sort of private part contact, but not necessarily to orgasm. So if your grinding it, their licking/kissing, your brushing upon, their touching, your on top of, again anything that involves private parts touching. I think that's crossing into the prostitute realm, even if it's on the foreplay level.
I don't think their is anything wrong with prostitution, making adult films and stuff, but it's definatly not for everyone. Like stripping or even modeling pants might make some uncomfortable. Some are more adventurous in how far they will go than others obviously. I used to dance at all nude bars and I remember thinking to myself a time or two in embarrassment, for some reason, "omg, I'm like totally naked and all these people are staring at me." lol!
Hell, Destiny's Child gave chair dances at the Bet Awards... The Pussycat Dolls are another example. Stripperdom is even a little mainstream entertainment popular and there are alot of different jobs out there that will let you express yourself if you so wish.





I think this post brings up this issue. Why is feeling like a whore or actually being a whore troublesome?
The most obvious reasons involve society's impression of selling sex, and relationship issues.
People who will do the best in this business are in it for a PURPOSE. And, outside negativity won't deter a dancer who has a clear cut financial goal and who is determined to see it through.
Men who have a knack for professional sports get paid more than women who chose to compete.
Women, on the other hand outearn men in the sexual arena.
Bottom line, to be in this business one must not be overly concerned what the outside world thinks of them, and be TOTALLY focused on gaining financial security from it.
This is a great business for women who don't want a mainstream job and have entrepreneurial minds.
For women who don't have their hearts in this business, and who are not financially ambitious, this business may not be right for them, because outside pressures can be frustrating at times.

well i feel like a whore all the time. no i am kidding. im not a stripper. but i work in the legal profession. and sometimes with issues I face I can sure feel like a two dollar hooker. perhaps feeling like a whore is not just for strippers. but for anyone involved in the hutsle.





I felt whorish but I was ok with that.




This whole question is leading into dangerous territory as everyone has a different definition of exactly what a whore is.
It suggests that strippers are unstable and perhaps have feelings of worthlessness or shame connected with our chosen professions. Dancing or entertaining is once again, one of the oldest professions around.
Whores or prostitutes preform a service and we like that chosen profession have stigmas attached to it. I've known some high-end escorts that got paid thousands of dollars for mere hours of their time, plus not all the time do their patrons want sex. It is like it says, they are an escort. Literally.
Legal profession, that is amusing and not to mention vague - lawyers are the biggest crooks on this planet and it's all done legally and in such ways that will leave you making the gaping fish face and saying " Thats just not right." I think if you are feeling whorish, first off look at exactly what that word means, to you and then look further inward.
Of course I do not mean this in an insulting fashion, as one of my posts that was quite blunt and straight forward was taken to be an insult. This is only my insight and honest opinion to a query made public. My two cents worth.
Miss R

Again for the person who felt like a whore. The advice previously suggested seems reasonable. Further I am not suggesting that being a whore or the stigma that is attached to it is bad nor I am suggesting that it is good. Rather, I am saying I can emphathize with others who may feel this way.
And crow that was a low blowI think lawyers perform a service that have stigmas attached to it. However, civil rights was a good thing. So was the 19th Amendment. I would think arguments and counterarguments would go on forever, well not really, but for a pretty long time, so maybe this issue is moot.
I also recognized that all professions can have abuse or abusers regardless of what profession a person chooses to become a part of.
Last, I am a legal researcher and not a very good one. And absolutely, positively, rootin tootinly (is that a word?) I respect Cro/Miss R opinion. Why would a noob wanna piss off a veteran member. She has a lot more posts than I do.
I think my statement is probably worth a penny but not enough for 2.
Last edited by smooth_and_cool; 08-06-2005 at 06:25 PM.





I have never felt like a ho per say but I have felt disrespected more than a few times by either customers, staff or other dancers.


i basically just got the fact ingrained in my brain that we are not having sex. we are selling a fantasy. it took me a while to get used to the job. just like you, i liked it most of the time, but other times i'd be crawling the bar and a random thought would come to my head. i'd think "what am i doing up here? i'm trash. this is some messed up stuff." then i would feel even worse for feeling comfortable at times doing it. how ironic is that?
but yeah..now about 2 1/2 years later, i am fine with what i do. it takes some time to get used to thinking outside of the box. i mean, obviously since you are in the biz, you already think "outside of the box"...but yeah...there are different degrees of thinking that way.
some people might never get used to the idea. if it bugs you too much, and if you are in a situation where it is possible, get out of the biz





I just had a quick idea...maybe you need to get into your stripper persona more? Of course I would never get up on a stage/bar as regular me and get naked in regular club but while at work Im someone else and totally believe my own sh*t.
you live like an ivy vine
you can only survive by clinging onto trees
that's your flaw
put down some roots so you can stand on your own
-Kenpachi




Oh Piffle - expressing a view is not disrespectful, what you do with it can be. Everyones view should be respected, whether I agree with it or not
It's like the old saying goes.. information is not stupid, what you do with can be.
I admire anyone who can speak and talk in an adult manner and discuss issues, how are we to learn if we only revolve around inside of our own little world. My view, nothing more.
Miss R
Well, let's put it this way. You are in a room and with you in that room you have with you fifteen other psople.
These people are not your own gender. You don't know them.
You have never seen them before.
All those people sit around you, and then you get up, go to the middle of the room,
Somebody turns on the radio, for a nice sexy jazzy tune.
Then you begin to dance around, swinging around, casually removing your clothes until
you are nearly or fully naked.
Now, I ask you. Would you feel embaraased? Would the total strangers in the room think that you have flipped your lid? Gone crazy? Would they call the police on you? HUh?
This is essentially what happens in a strip club.
Strangely enough though, I feel no shame. The only difference I see between the hypotheticcal room and the strip club is this.
In the room, I am not being paid. In the strip club, I am.
Monetary concerns are the only difference here.
If I were to get up in a room full of stranger and all of a sudden I did start taking off my clothes for no other express purpose, I deserved to be committed.
However, if in a room, the same room full of strangers paid me for the express purpose ot
taking my clothes off, I do my gig and I get paid.
Funny, how money becomes the dividing line between a libertine and a harlot.
Oops, did I say the word, harlot? Oh, yes I did. Then that's what I am then.
And if I am, my feelings don't matter, no, not at all. The fact of my being has already been decided.
Ummm.... well, ONE of the differences is money... one is that you go by a different name, different persona at work... one is that strip clubs are darker, okay, I'll just list them... everyone's there to see you (and other girls) naked already, they aren't as likely to notice you otherwise because you weren't THE naked dancing girl...Originally Posted by NadiaRX
Are you for real?
If you think school is hard, try being stupid.





That is a generalized description. An example profession would be marketing and many others which are just into exploitation and trickery. One could equate stripping in this context with the Lottery or legalized gambling.Originally Posted by Deogol
Someone I know who dislikes the stripping profession says that sex or implied the promise of should only be given away to someone you care about. She does admit that sex sells lots of things, but it is not actual sexual activity, just the fantasy of having sex with someone, like a major actress in as very revealing pose, or marketing autos so the believes he is able to impress some chick (hoping to bed her) with his new Beamer. She would not admit to her inconsistency about stripping.
Last edited by threlayer; 08-07-2005 at 10:24 AM.
I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.
Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.
NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.





IMO the main difference between doing it at a strip club vs randomly in a room full of strangers, is that in the strip club, the people are EXPECTING you to strip and are there because they want to see you do it but in the random room they're not. Whether you're getting paid or not, it makes a world of difference when all involved are WILLING participants.Originally Posted by NadiaRX
As for the rest of the thread, I think the "feeling like a whore" phrase actually means more like feeling dirty. The word whore often supplants the word dirty in conversation, especially when any type of sexuality is involved.
I'm firm in my belief that if anyone feels dirty in this business they shouldn't be doing it. Feeling dirty for crossing some personal line within the business is one thing - just stick to your comfort zone; feeling dirty for stripping in general is entirely another - just quit now and find another source of income.
As you go further, and become more experienced, any such feelings will gradually subside and go away. If it don't, seriously consider making a career change.
You gotta walk it like you got it, coz otherwise you ain't gonna make it.
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