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Thread: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

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    Default "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Ok, I'm know I'm hassling with all these questions, but this thing is driving me crazy. I've now (in this first week of work) had about three or four guys absolutely gush over me...like go on and on. This is not to brag (some guy told me today at work flat out that he thought the waitress was the prettiest girl there). And most guys I dance for are appreciative, which seems nice and normal. I don't think I'm the prettiest girl there, not objectively. BUT I am of a certain kinda cutesy type I guess. Just the light blond, bubbly talking, nasal voice...whatever. I've also twice gotten guys swearing I'm American because I have an 'American accent' (yeah, what's the difference between that and an 'ontario accent', I have no clue!).

    So, I talk to these guys and they do this gushing thing, but then after a while (and I really appreciate the compliments!) when I ask them to dance they say "no, they'd feel guilty". I'm too "nice". Another girl there said she thought I just had that sweet little girl thing going on, and maybe some guys don't want that. I know I can't please everyone, but these dudes in particular definitely seem to like me, so how can I convince them that what I would like is some $$$ and to therefore dance for them?

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    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Ugh, I've heard that. I promptly say something really dirty. Sometimes it works... sometimes it doesn't... but there are worse things I guess for them to say.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    God/dess DancerWealth's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    When you hear that you're "too nice" to buy a dance from, a good response is "Well, you've seen my nice side here, but I also have a VEEERRRY sinful side that would really shock you. That's what makes my dances the best in here because you get to see a side of me you've never thought possible." Works like a charm.

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Oh, Darlin'. They don't mean it. That is a brush off. There are lots of guys in clubs that want to sit and chat and look and get the whole dancer experience without buying dances. It's not you, it's them. Go ahead and push, for the 1 out of 10 that will succumb, but don't expect them to suddenly pony up because you tell them that you aren't that nice, after all.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    Featured Member Sunshine73's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Ugh, I get this sometimes too. It drives me insane. I have tried DW's approach. Sometimes it works, sometimes not.
    I'll respond with "Good! Then let me be your guilty pleasure."
    Or I say "Yes I may be a nice girl but I have a very naughty streak." Or "Nice girls like me can get away with being more naughty."
    Jeez, I thought these guys went into SCs to get away from their mean ole salty Biatches!
    Quote Originally Posted by Picaresque View Post
    Maria Callas said it best: "When my critics stop hissing, I shall know I'm slipping."

  6. #6
    tampafldancer
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    they are BULLSHITTING YOU!

    No offense, im sure you are a great person and a good dancer... but when guys say that they are trying to find a nice way to get out of a dance.

    Move on... even if you convince them to do one, i dont see them staying for long.

  7. #7
    Pamela
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Yep. Agree with what most said here. It's a BS game. They want to sit talk and spend some time, but do not want a dance. That is why i would only spend a short amount of time with a new customer. I felt this way i would not waste my time on a LOSER.

    Pamela

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    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Customer to English Translation:

    "Maybe Later" ----> No
    "I Wanna See You On Stage First" ---> No
    "I'm Not Ready Yet" ----> No
    "You're Too Nice" ----> No

    If they feed you the "too nice" line, all you can do is wish them well, tell them your name, and that you'll be happy to accomidate them later if they have a change of heart and wish to see your naughty side.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

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    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    I agree with doc's translations, but when someone says 'maybe later', it's possible they mean it, so you might want to respond with something like "make sure to let me know when you're ready", just in case

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    Senior Member Luke34's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Quote Originally Posted by mollyzmoon
    So, I talk to these guys and they do this gushing thing, but then after a while (and I really appreciate the compliments!) when I ask them to dance they say "no, they'd feel guilty". I'm too "nice". Another girl there said she thought I just had that sweet little girl thing going on, and maybe some guys don't want that. I know I can't please everyone, but these dudes in particular definitely seem to like me, so how can I convince them that what I would like is some $$$ and to therefore dance for them?
    I am going to bite the bullet here and say something you may not want to hear.

    Too nice maybe a convenient way to say no. However, if you are consistently getting the " too nice" comment you are probably too nice. To put this in perspective most of you will have met a person who will just about do anything for you, has just about everything right about them but you won't date them because they are just "too nice"...

    Perhaps reply the too nice with “ Do you enjoy my company?” which you have to get a "yes" from here.... and then the follow up “ I would like to get to know you better too (ie keep the fantasy open) but I am here to work… would you like to pay for my company ?”

    If the compliment was genuine and not an excuse, you may even score some $$$. On the down side you may not get the too nice verdict too often from here on.

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    God/dess gypsy_girlchild's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    A guy actually told me this, but I got the hint.. He was actually a masochist that liked to be talked down to (he was a lawyer or something.) I told him I understood what he meant and I was sooooo close to telling him, "You're tacky and I hate you." But I was in a good mood and didn't feel like messing it up with him.
    Please don't lick me, it tickles..



  12. #12
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    This phrase always sounds better coming out of an Irishman's mouth, but I digress....

    Two answers: "You're gonna meet my evil twin in a minute! Ha ha!"

    Bat your pretty eyes and say, "And you're too nice also. I feel bad for trying to take your money. Now I'm going to go in back and cry in shame. Thanks for nothing."

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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    When I 1st started dancing up in Sacramento only two months of being 18....I would ALWAYS get that line. Or "I like spending time with you...howa bout dinner instead?"...or "you seem really nice I cant get a dance from you now"

    I now know I was being "too" real with them meaning too much me and not enough fantasy. I fixed this by being more fantasy. So, I talked more about sexy things, flirted more, touched them more (like on the thigh, arm, snuggling), being more girly. I wasnt McStripper (to me at least) but more not me and more stripper. More of what he wanted so to speak.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



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    Senior Member robinbanks's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Often a custy says this because hes gotten too much of your time for free already. Give em five minutes to fall under your spell and move on.

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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Quote Originally Posted by Pamela
    Yep. Agree with what most said here. It's a BS game. They want to sit talk and spend some time, but do not want a dance. That is why i would only spend a short amount of time with a new customer. I felt this way i would not waste my time on a LOSER.

    Pamela
    Ouch. Why he gotta be a loser? lol

    Seriously though, this is usually just a brush-off statement. It isn't something a guy is likely to say if he doesn't genuinely think you are nice though.

    You may want try some ways to sex-up your look or style of speech a bit. I am not sure how you go about that, but perhaps some dancers have suggestions? I just think this is a line I would say to a cute or nice girl that is lacking that something extra that would make me want to spend $$$.

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    Featured Member london's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    I agree with Stringer. You just might be too nice....have to sex it up a little bit. I got that a lot at first, too, because I treated an introduction like an introduction in the REAL world, but the strip club AIN'T the real world..lol...If you want to keep some innocence about you, smile a lot, act a little coy, but give them that piercing 'I wanna fuck you' look and bring a lot of attention to your best asset: eyes, thighs, tits..lol.....Play the game, pretend you're in a movie and you wanna seduce that guy! Even if it's cheesy at first, a lot of guys get amused and will try you out .....LAP DANCE..hee hee
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Hmm....thanks all! I think my problem definitely was not being sexy enough...too 'me', not enough 'strippah!'

    Naturally I am very platonic actly, not a big flirt. I'm working on amping up the persona. It's sorta working! I am making more money recently...will try to be more seductive, less girl guide.

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    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    "Too Nice" and everything else Doc listed may actaully be brush offs . . . . but not always.

    Even if they are brush offs, guys use these excuses b/c they are too chicken to jsut say "no thank you." like normal human beings. Use this to your advantage.

    Unless a fantasic regular jsut wlaked in the door and you know he wants you NOW, always protect your time investment in the sales pitch as much as possible.

    Always, always, always counter an objection.

    Think about it this way:

    You have just spent 5 minutes or more chatting up this guy here in front of you. He has jsut given you the "too nice" line. You can do one of the following:

    --Say "OK, bye" and go look for a new prospect who, after another investment of time, may or may not give you a better outcome.

    --Say something sarcastic like "Thanks for wasting my time, loser!" and go looking for a better opportunity

    -- invest another 30 seconds, put on your best mischief face, and toss out one of the lines offered here or one of your own choosing. You might get a "no", but then again you might not. Then you can give him the naughtiest dance of his life and attempt to sell him a few more (easier once you are past that first-dance hump).

    In my experience, you should NEVER accept the first objection unless it is the immediate "not interested" or "waiting for somebody" comment when you first introduce yourself. It only takes a few seconds to overcome that initial objection, and can lead to quite a few dances that you would not have gotten otherwise. This can save you night on a slow night.


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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    I don't think I've ever been convinced to change my mind once I've said NO to a dance request by a dancer. I may have different ways of saying it ('cause I'm almost always polite), but it all adds up to NO.

    I may agree to a dance at a later point in time by you. Just depends. But I find it increasingly annoying once I've turned a dancer down that she persists without at least walking away for a little while before coming back. Props to Colleen if that tactic works for her without pissing guys like me off!

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    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    The trick is, you have to say it with a smile and a tease. Sometimes they are jsut waiting to be convinced (this is some people' s buying style, not everyones!) and sometimes they jsut want to see what you are going to say.

    I don't think I have ever pissed anybody off doing this. If they ARE that sensitive, well . . . . I don't know what to tell ya! We ARE sales professionals, after all, and if you don't want people to attemept to sell you things, why come into the store?

    It probably works immediately one in 10 or so times. SOmetimes they decide they want you later because of something you said.

    My point is, she has already spent 5 or 10 minutes chating up the guy. At that point, it makes sense to come back with a quick, playful one-liner (Too nice? Oh, no, sweetie, that's just the face I show to the world. LIke Superman pretending to be Clark Kent. Deep down, I'm as wild as they come. *wink* C'mon, let me show you!)

    This MIGHT sell a dance or two. It might not. Depending on the night and the club, it is porbably worth a try.

    IF he is still turning her down, she may now have a better sense of waht his objection really is, that is to say, if he really does think she is so "nice" as to be a boring dancer (as in, nice girls don' DO that), or if he is declining for some other reason. If she chooses to go back and try again later, she has already piqued his curiosity and set herself up for it. (Hi, honey! Remember me! Are you NOW ready to meet my down & dirty alter ego?)

    I would never push past one counter to an objection. My time and my pride are worth more than that.


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    God/dess threlayer's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    How's this response sound?

    "Hey, you sexy hunk, if you think I'm nice now, just wait till we get into that private dance area. You'll be surprised how fast I knock your socks off!"
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    Nice girls are sexy. I spend on nice girls before I spend on almost any other attribute. These guys are BSing you.
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  24. #23
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    I just thought of a good response to this line. What do y'all think?

    Him: "You're too nice; I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you."
    You (with your deepest sexiest gaze straight into his eyes and a little smile):
    "I promise to make it worth the guilt."

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    Member JuliaChild's Avatar
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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    I'm the "nice girl" at my club. On average, I make about 3x more than the other dancers. Nice girls are gold because they seem very rare in this business. The trick is to make it work for you. I get many comments about being wife material. When I hear that, I know that I did not approach them with the proper sales technique.

    "You're too nice" --> You aren't assertive enough or You didn't use the proper sales pitch.

    I'm thoroughly enjoying the responses to this thread. They're incredibly witty. I love it!

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    Default Re: "You're too nice, I'd feel guilty buying a dance from you..."

    "You're too nice" --> You aren't assertive enough or You didn't use the proper sales pitch.
    That is pretty much it. It can be a brush-off or it can be that you didn't approach this patron (potential customer) in the 'right' manner.... or it could be your work persona.

    This is why I do School Girl so damn well. Not only do I have the petite, natural body to pull it off... I also opt to look like the 'innocent' not the punk or bitch version of School Girl (more 'natural' looking make-up and style of costume). I then work this angle (bubbly, personable, not swearing, a little coy) and say how naughty I really am in a more intimate private setting.



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