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Thread: Does it make it easier...

  1. #1
    Gendai73
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    Default Does it make it easier...

    For u as a dancer to automatically assume the every guy reguardless of how well he may treat u in the club...

    thinks of you as nothing more than a irestistible sex toy?

  2. #2
    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    It isn't true, but if you think of women that way, I guess that is your hang up.

    *because dancers are women, and not just some kind of digital animation portrayed for your pleaseure only...

    Unless this post is meant to be some kind of joke, I don't get it.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Veteran Member luvbuniz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by Paris
    It isn't true, but if you think of women that way, I guess that is your hang up.

    *because dancers are women, and not just some kind of digital animation portrayed for your pleaseure only...

    Unless this post is meant to be some kind of joke, I don't get it.
    Some guys feel better about buying dances if they can objectify you. He's one of them.

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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    I think he meant that WE assume they think that way?
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Veteran Member Yea's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    i don’t get the question.. assumptions are always a waist of time and blinding to reality.


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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    This is a bit of a problem for me, I guess. On the one hand, I WANT most the guys to think of me that way - the fewer attachments in the SC the better IMO. On the other hand, I don't want them to TREAT me that way. Heh, how's that for a contradiction?

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by Gendai73
    For u as a dancer to automatically assume the every guy reguardless of how well he may treat u in the club...thinks of you as nothing more than a irestistible sex toy?
    Got the reverse problem - I've got several OTC friendships with dancers. Having got to know them and several other dancers as individuals, I don't think I could regard any dancer as an "irresistable sex object."

    Sorry, but dancers are individuals like the rest of us - people with their own hopes, fears and objectives - and to treat them purely as sex-toys is frankly demeaning towards them.

    Phil.

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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by Gendai73
    For u as a dancer to automatically assume the every guy reguardless of how well he may treat u in the club...

    thinks of you as nothing more than a irestistible sex toy?


    For u as a CUSTOMER to automatically assume the every DANCER reguardless of how well SHE may treat u in the club...

    thinks of you as nothing more than a CASH MACHINE?

    I agree with Paris and Bridgette - I want dancers to think of me as a person too but quit giving me these confusing signals about something else that may be going on between us.

  9. #9
    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by FourWinns
    For u as a CUSTOMER to automatically assume the every DANCER reguardless of how well SHE may treat u in the club...

    thinks of you as nothing more than a CASH MACHINE?
    Considering that dancers strip to make a living and pay their bills, I think cash does play into it. Sure, it would be nice to be considered a SEX MACHINE instead of a CASH MACHINE but thats not realistic for 99% of the junkie population.

    Quote Originally Posted by FourWinns
    I agree with Paris and Bridgette - I want dancers to think of me as a person too but quit giving me these confusing signals about something else that may be going on between us.
    I'm not sure that Paris and Bridgette would be in agreement but whatever. Anyway, the "signals" you are referring to are only confusing if you dont understand what is going on. A strippers job is to get customers all hot and bothered and thus extract money from them. A customers job is to get value for his dollars spent however one might interpret that. It's really not that complicated.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  10. #10
    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by FBR
    Anyway, the "signals" you are referring to are only confusing if you dont understand what is going on. A strippers job is to get customers all hot and bothered and thus extract money from them. A customers job is to get value for his dollars spent however one might interpret that. It's really not that complicated.

    FBR
    Well, you are assuming you know what signals the other poster is referring to, but since he didn't say what those signals are, you don't.

    Like what if the signals were that the dancer keeps calling the customer up, asking him out, insisting on paying when they go out, bringing him little gifts, but still asking him to come to the club, still asking for dances, yet trying not to take proffered tips ITC? would those be confusing signals?

  11. #11
    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by dlabtot
    Well, you are assuming you know what signals the other poster is referring to, but since he didn't say what those signals are, you don't.

    Like what if the signals were that the dancer keeps calling the customer up, asking him out, insisting on paying when they go out, bringing him little gifts, but still asking him to come to the club, still asking for dances, yet trying not to take proffered tips ITC? would those be confusing signals?

    He didnt say anything regarding the "what ifs" you mentioned. If the dancer is doing more than the usual club flirting to make money, then let the poster say so. Otherwise its business as usual.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    God/dess PaigeDWinter's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    I'm sure some girls do, but I know I dont. I prefer a customer, male or female, to see me as a living, breathing, feeling, THINKING human.
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  13. #13
    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by FBR
    He didnt say anything regarding the "what ifs" you mentioned.
    Yeah, that was my point: he didn't say, yet you assumed that you knew what he meant anyway. You said the signals weren't confusing even though you have absolutely no clue what the signals were.

  14. #14
    Gendai73
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    my Current atf told me last visit. during the conversation she said

    "i know i'm nothing more than a sex toy to you."

    after that i augued with her about it for 15-20 minutes i think she finally got my point but still extremely confused.

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    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    I agree with Four Winns actually. It's one thing for a stripper to engage in the "usual" strip club flirting and whatnot. It's another to try to imply there's "something else going on" as he says. Some girls do try to play into some weird bf-gf role too much, and I can see how that causes confusion. Treat the guys like a person but don't try to make him think there's more going on than really is.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by PaigeDWinter
    I'm sure some girls do, but I know I dont. I prefer a customer, male or female, to see me as a living, breathing, feeling, THINKING human.
    But doesn't being seen as the "living, breathing, feeling, THINKING human" result in an increased incidence of invites to meet/date OTC? (Not your average dancer's preference).

    Phil.

  17. #17
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Is it loser posting week on Stripperweb or something?

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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Some guys feel better about buying dances if they can objectify you. He's one of them.
    Please. Methinks doth protest too much.

    The only thing women hate more than being a sexual object is not being a sexual object.
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  19. #19
    God/dess PaigeDWinter's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by Phil-W
    But doesn't being seen as the "living, breathing, feeling, THINKING human" result in an increased incidence of invites to meet/date OTC? (Not your average dancer's preference).

    Phil.
    Not for me it doesnt. I get more guys who respect me and treat me with respect because I am NOT a glorified inflatable doll.
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  20. #20
    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette
    I agree with Four Winns actually. It's one thing for a stripper to engage in the "usual" strip club flirting and whatnot. It's another to try to imply there's "something else going on" as he says. Some girls do try to play into some weird bf-gf role too much, and I can see how that causes confusion. Treat the guys like a person but don't try to make him think there's more going on than really is.
    B, I agree with you. But it also behooves the customer to learn how to deal with the out of the ordinary SS, if for no other reason than to preserve his sanity. The pseudo-OTC SS may not be nice but it happens all the time. If the customer starts believing it, hes gonna crash and burn faster than the Hindenburg.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by FBR
    ... the "signals" you are referring to are only confusing if you dont understand what is going on.
    FBR
    The more I think about it - you're correct - believe I'm the confused one - most dancers I've encountered thus far are pretty straightforward.

    But I met a dancer I really enjoy talking to and she's hinting about meeting OTC and I admit I wouldn't mind getting to know her better. Guess I'll never know if she's serious or just playing me unless I pursue it.

    The other thing that confused me for a bit that I chalk up to being new to SCs... I didn't expect to find hookers in the clubs. I found it odd that $150 "car" payments kept getting worked into conversations. It took me a while to realize they were talking about a different kind of ride.

    I keep telling myself to just watch the girls, get some dances, leave and forget anything they tell me - but it's hard to do that sometimes.

  22. #22
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    $150??? That's it? How dumb are those girls?

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  23. #23
    Featured Member The_Oceans's Avatar
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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Don't know if I'm off topic with the following, so if I am, spork me at will...

    Lately when I go to clubs I try to treat the dancers "professionally" (as in this is fun, but it's also business). I used to fall into the RIL trap rather easily, especially with dancers I'd see fairly often, or every time I was in town. The more I enjoyed their company, the more I spent, the more I would hope that this would transcend the dancer/customer vibe.

    Nowadays, while I don't let myself get trapped, it all seems so...mechanical. Intro, small talk, VIP room, grind, pay, salutations. Lather, rinse, repeat. While this may be the best way to stay in control, it sure doesn't sound like fun, does it?
    "Women, not girls, rule my world" - Prince

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    Default Re: Does it make it easier...

    Quote Originally Posted by The_Oceans
    Lately when I go to clubs I try to treat the dancers "professionally" (as in this is fun, but it's also business). I used to fall into the RIL trap rather easily, especially with dancers I'd see fairly often, or every time I was in town. The more I enjoyed their company, the more I spent, the more I would hope that this would transcend the dancer/customer vibe.

    Nowadays, while I don't let myself get trapped, it all seems so...mechanical. Intro, small talk, VIP room, grind, pay, salutations. Lather, rinse, repeat. While this may be the best way to stay in control, it sure doesn't sound like fun, does it?
    So, accept that in 99.9% of cases, you're not going to see a dancer OTC.

    If you have a dance tell the dancer that you don't take it 100% seriously, but she's got a nice figure and you'll appreciate seeing it to it's best advantage. Make a point of letting her know you understand it's only a bit of fun, and that she's acting purely as an entertainer - in other words let her dance on her terms.

    Most dancer's I know actually like to be appreciated, both for figure and dancing skills, and if they know that their customer is going to treat the dance as entertainment only, (with no OTC intentions), do their best to put on as enjoyable a performance as possible.

    Sure, it's a job of work to a dancer, but they're like the rest of us; they find it easier to entertain if they're not continually worrying about being asked for a date, etc. If a dancer knows that she'll get repeat dances from a custy that likes her for her ITC personality, and with no great ambitions beyond that, you might just find she'll treat you on a more friendly/relaxed basis and that she'll put some genuine enthusiasm into her dances.

    Your lack of fun is due to unrealistic expectations - the great majority of dancers don't want to genuinely meet customers OTC for a more personal relationship. Have more realistic expectations - you can see a pretty woman naked and enjoying performing for you on her terms. You might just find that fun, particularly if you convey that attitude to the dancer and she responds accordingly.

    Phil.

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