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Thread: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

  1. #1
    madmaxine
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    How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    OK patriotic StripperWebbers, I have a quandry. My friend T. whom I have wished to sex up for years has just informed me that the US Army is going to station him overseas for 3 years.
    He leaves in a week and it's my last chance to, uh, be with him. However, I respect him so much, if he turns me down cold, I'll slink off after mumbling an apology. Truly, I value his respect.
    OK, any suggestions are welcome. Ironically, this is the one time I'd love to see him come off of his high horse and just indulge in low, dirty, non-romantic sex. But how do I do this in a classy way? The whole reason I adore him is that he's a Rennisance man. But hey, they need sex too!
    PS No he is not gay. He's been engaged before, to a girl with my same name....pretty rich, huh?

  2. #2
    God/dess MojoJojo's Avatar
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    Being male, I will say this - you two are friends - Can he handle a friendly screw? If so - hook up - fuck his brains out - give something to go to Iraq with. And good luck to him, eh?
    "The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
    -Humphrey Bogart

    "Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
    -Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
    "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
    -His reply

    "If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
    -David Daye

  3. #3
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    Better yet, we're old friends- we haven't seen eachother in a long time due to my travel habits & his military obligations. So no weirdness there. However, he was mad at me for a long time for my staying with my loser ex (long story.)
    The funny part is that I have been turned off of sex for a while, so I could easily handle a rejection. But all things considered, it would be dumb to pass up an encounter now.

  4. #4
    God/dess MojoJojo's Avatar
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    Sounds like a moment for some good old fashioned 1960's hippy sex!!!!
    "The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind."
    -Humphrey Bogart

    "Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink."
    -Lady Astor to Winston Churchill
    "Madam, if you were my wife, I would drink it."
    -His reply

    "If God had intended us to drink beer, He would have given us stomachs."
    -David Daye

  5. #5
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    The things you regret most in this life are the risks you never take.

    Dress the part, make the offer completely irresistible and eminently appealing, and do so without ambiguity or hesitation.

    Once the die is cast, you'll feel better about it regardless of the outcome, because at least you asked for what you wanted.

    Best wishes, MM.

    <S> MM
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  6. #6
    God/dess
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    Just grab him and kiss him and see what happens. I would go with the impulse move.

  7. #7
    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    holy shit yes susan wayward has the gold on this one.

    I would kill somebody, right in front of their own mother, for a girl to just take me through impulse.

    Well, not really, but I am pretty depraved in that respect.
    Last edited by Mastridonicus; 10-02-2005 at 09:15 AM.
    People are not ruled by their memories.

  8. #8
    Featured Member GnBeret's Avatar
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    JUST "JUMP HIM" ALREADY!!!!
    "That's your answer Old Man? I guess you're a Hard Case too...."
    - Luke
    "Some men, you just can't reach...."
    - Boss, re Luke

    If there's one thing in my life these years have taught me,
    it's that you can always see it coming, but you can never stop it.
    -Cowboy Junkies

  9. #9
    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    You just tell him straight out.. "I'm screwing you before you leave" Throw him down, tie him down and take control...

    well.. maybe not... but that's what I'd do! Kiss him. Every guy I have ever been with, I've always made the first move.. well, except one.. and now I'm married to him... he got me... threw me for a loop too... actually had balls to go after what he wanted...

    You see guys.. some of us dominating women would enjoy being thrown around once in a while.. take us by surprise, fuck our brains out for a change...

    sorry, didn't mean to hijack.. just an interesting topic and pose of a question..


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  10. #10
    Featured Member Paintbaby's Avatar
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    It's actually a win-win situation, Madmaxine. If he doesn't go for it (though I have a hard time believing that he wouldn't), you don't have to see him for 3 years, which will be more than enough time for you to get over the embarrassment.If he does go for it, you just gave him a really nice memory, and yourself some fun too.

    Gift wrap a box of condoms. Tie a pretty little ribbon around your wrist--nothing too big or noticeable. Tell him you have a couple of going away gifts for him. Invite him over, and make sure the wine is flowing. When he opens the box, he'll probably laugh/look at you quizzically. That is the moment you extend your hand with the ribbon tied on your wrist and say "Don't you want to open your other going away present?" If he looks shocked (not the reaction you were hoping for), you can just laugh it off, and say "Don't be ridiculous! I'm only kidding! Just be safe over there!" Although, I'm sure his reaction will be more along the lines of untying bow then ripping off your clothes.

    Corny as HELL, I know, but I did this with a "platonic" friend who moved to Australia for a year. We dated for 2 years when he came back. )

  11. #11
    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    I've said no to friends, because I didn't want to muddy the waters... I've also enjoyed a friendly fuck with friends because we were both horny...so far it's all worked out good.... just be direct, after all, you're friends, right? ... good luck!!!!

  12. #12
    God/dess
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    Default Re: How 2 B A Smooth Stimulator?

    Take him on a dinner date relax like you always do around him - tell him what you want and if he takes it well um you know what to do - if not just continue being his friend that you would love to fuck lol . Dont corner him just tell him whats on your mind break the rene !

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