Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: Dealing with money

  1. #1
    God/dess
    Joined
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Temporary Lurkmode...
    Posts
    12,609
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 79 Times in 35 Posts

    Default Dealing with money

    When your bf/hubby knows you dance how do you deal with money?

    Its hard for me to deal with the money thing and trying not to get taken advantage of or come off as a stingy bitch. I dont want to pay for everything or make him pay for eveything. An easy solution to this would be to go dutch. 1/2 and 1/2.

    I still think its nice for a guy to p/u the check at dinner. So what if I make more than him...were on a date. Not all the time he would have to pay for dinner but if someone invites you out...I think he should p/u the check. Agree anyone?

    How do you plan trips, have a savings, go to dinner, recreation, etc? You get the point. Maybe Im a little stingy but people dont get rich by spending loads of cash.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



  2. #2
    God/dess
    Joined
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    2,352
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Dealing with money

    Well with a boyfriend I think the money stuation has a whole different set of rules then being married - well strike that - I guess that could change with a long term relationship . But when you are married ( at least in my case ) the money goes into one pot its all the same . A casual date well go dutch that way no one is totally obligated to support the other - usually I wouldnt think this would become a problem once you are comfortable with the person . As far as should the person who has the bigger bank pay all the time - no ..

  3. #3
    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    3,103
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 15 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Dealing with money

    I'm married, but I have my own money. He has his own money. And then, we have our money.

    I firmly believe that if a man invites you to dinner than its his treat. I'm old fashioned that way. However, if I say to my husband, "let's go out to dinner!" I usually will pick up the tab.

    My husband hates this. He hates it because I am very anal about money. I don't want to be yelled at like I was in my first marriage about spending money, or buying something, I prefer to have my own money, him to have his, and us to have ours. So a solution we had was to open up a separate account for us that we both contribute to for our household expenses. However, I've been warned that once he gets home from deployment this is changing because he is sick of managing three accounts..

    We will see how far he gets with this stubborn independent redhead!

    I suggest you and he have a discussion about finances. Explain that when invited out by him, you are being invited, as a guest. I am gathering you aren't married? and the same goes for you.. you invite him over for dinner, you pick up the items needed, you cook , etc.. you trade off... if he doesn't understand this concept than he may be just a moocher.... let's hope not.


    [/URL]
    [/URL]



  4. #4
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2003
    Posts
    5,493
    Thanks
    120
    Thanked 50 Times in 35 Posts

    Default Re: Dealing with money

    ^^^ That is how I did it too.

  5. #5
    Banned BigGreenMnM's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2004
    Location
    Virginia countryside.
    Posts
    3,299
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Dealing with money

    Im with CJ,there is a huge difference between boyfriend and hubby,and depending on what state your in,i guess it would also include long term relationships and commonlaw marriage.

    If its a hubby/commonlaw/family thing,the way its worked for me is,everything is a money stream,it all flows into the family pot,everything for the family comes out of that pot.
    To include the dinner check.

    If its a boyfriend,everything is in your name(lease's,phone,elec bill etc)you have seperate checking accounts,he pays half,or his fair share depending on the level YOUR job affords you.(meaning,if he is a grease monkey,making min wage,he cant be expected to pay half of your condo fee's)
    Yes he fuckin pays for dinner,doesnt matter if he asked you out or not.
    wanna fight about equal rights or "dutch",fine,you can get the tip,make it a good one like the one i was going to leave.
    Tradition says i pay for dinner.(and yes,im going to be opening doors and pullin out chairs to!!!If you didnt like that,we wouldnt be there anyways imo)

    Until you get that ring,keep your foundation in your name,keep the funds in your name in the event things change.(and in this business,they do,99% of the time)

    Breaking up is hard to do when his name is on the lease,he has your banking numbers,or he owns half the car.

  6. #6
    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
    Joined
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    3,103
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 15 Times in 9 Posts

    Default Re: Dealing with money

    Big Green brings up a good point here so I wanted to add something else along the lines to my post...

    My hubby makes more than I do, so he doesn't require me to pay half of the house payment and half of the utilities or half of the food bill.. instead, we take those totals and we added them up, and the ratio ends up being him paying 60% and me paying 40% of things (Remember, I'm no longer dancing, I work a regular job now), he also doesn't commute as far as I do, so out of my 40% he knocks off another 100 bucks for my gas money.. however, I still put in extra, so that there is a cushion of sorts..

    And, my ex lives with his girlfriend and he moved in with her, her name is on the lease, the ultilities etc.. and she's kicked him out before... sucks big time.. since because everything is in her name, he can't prove that he lives there too.. so... in that case, the last time they kissed and made up, he suggested that they re do their lease so that his name was on it too.. and now it is... they share half and half... just a thought there for you too.. your landlord might be happy to make the change for you, that way, you are also not stuck with the full rent if he decided to bail on you.


    [/URL]
    [/URL]



  7. #7
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    227
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 4 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re: Dealing with money

    Quote Originally Posted by BigGreenMnM
    Im with CJ,there is a huge difference between boyfriend and hubby,and depending on what state your in,i guess it would also include long term relationships and commonlaw marriage.

    If its a hubby/commonlaw/family thing,the way its worked for me is,everything is a money stream,it all flows into the family pot,everything for the family comes out of that pot.
    To include the dinner check.

    If its a boyfriend,everything is in your name(lease's,phone,elec bill etc)you have seperate checking accounts,he pays half,or his fair share depending on the level YOUR job affords you.(meaning,if he is a grease monkey,making min wage,he cant be expected to pay half of your condo fee's)
    Yes he fuckin pays for dinner,doesnt matter if he asked you out or not.
    wanna fight about equal rights or "dutch",fine,you can get the tip,make it a good one like the one i was going to leave.
    Tradition says i pay for dinner.(and yes,im going to be opening doors and pullin out chairs to!!!If you didnt like that,we wouldnt be there anyways imo)

    Until you get that ring,keep your foundation in your name,keep the funds in your name in the event things change.(and in this business,they do,99% of the time)

    Breaking up is hard to do when his name is on the lease,he has your banking numbers,or he owns half the car.
    Amen to that! Common sense will tell you if you have a freeloader on your hands . He should not be asking about how much you made unless you are married, in my oppinion.

Similar Threads

  1. Dealing with the negativity
    By ProphecyGirl in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 05-09-2008, 01:42 PM
  2. Dealing With Pussy
    By LadySoft in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 53
    Last Post: 10-14-2007, 02:57 PM
  3. Dealing with Jerks
    By jsmythe23 in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 12-27-2005, 03:10 AM
  4. Dealing with a *****
    By goldengrl69 in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 10-16-2005, 09:52 AM
  5. pathetic dealing with money
    By missmolly in forum Dollar Den
    Replies: 21
    Last Post: 07-07-2004, 08:21 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •