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Thread: I cheated...

  1. #1
    Senior Member RicanAsianMa's Avatar
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    I cheated...

    So, mostly everyone knows about my situation with my bf. He goes out pretty often, puts me down, and has cheated on me. While he does this I work, go to school, and take care of our son. I'm tired of his stuff. All of a sudden he hangs out with gangbangers and acts like one.

    Well, payback is a bitch. I think. I'm kinda happy with what I've done. I cheated on him today. About an hour ago. I slept with my ex boyfriend who also took my virginity. It was great. I've never really had good sex with anyone but my ex. He wants to get together again and start hanging out. You know date and stuff.

    Will I be wrong if I go ahead with him?

  2. #2
    Senior Member JumbliesMan's Avatar
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Well that's... immature.

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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Why dont you get away from your bf? He doesnt sound like a very good person and for your own sanity and safety your son and you shouldnt be around him.

    Do the right thing (the mature thing) and get your now bf out of your life and then date again. Hell have nothing to hold against you (unless he finds out) after youve left him.
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



  4. #4
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Quote Originally Posted by TigersMilk
    Why dont you get away from your bf? He doesnt sound like a very good person and for your own sanity and safety your son and you shouldnt be around him.

    Do the right thing (the mature thing) and get your now bf out of your life and then date again. Hell have nothing to hold against you (unless he finds out) after youve left him.
    I agree. That seems like the best way to handle the situation and cause less problems for you and your son.

  5. #5
    Senior Member RicanAsianMa's Avatar
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    So.... Yes, your right. I guess I shouldn't have done that. But it was definately something I needed at the moment.

  6. #6
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Well whats done is done. Oh well cant change the past. All you can do is move on to a better life. Hell at least is was good sex...hehe
    you live like an ivy vine
    you can only survive by clinging onto trees
    that's your flaw
    put down some roots so you can stand on your own
    -Kenpachi



  7. #7
    Senior Member RicanAsianMa's Avatar
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Great....it was great!

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    Default Re: I cheated...

    you got to try talking first befor u jump into bed with someone els ...ure b/f sounds like he needs a kick in the butt ..not that i know ure situation or anything but ay .. would sound better if you broke it off with him then start seeing other ppl ..i belive once you break that respect thing(cheating)that evry time you you have a tiff with someone the answer will be to go sleep with someone to make you feel better ...it might work but there are other ways ... i hope you sort things out tho ...good luck

  9. #9
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Two wrongs dont make a right. Staying with someone who has no repect for you or cheats on you will only make any future relationships hard on you. This becomes the "I wonder if hes cheating on me" in future relationships because your self esteem and trust was abused. The best revenge is to take care of you and your son. Stay with a friend or family member if you need helpgetting on your feet.

    He already knows you will take him back since you alkready did so now it's easier for him. Only associate with him in regards to your son. I know you have heard this before. It does come down to this....

    The three people in Life...

    There are people that make thiings happen...
    Watch Things Happen.....
    Wonder what the [email protected] just happened.

    Make leaving Happen, LEAVE

  10. #10
    Featured Member Krazyjane's Avatar
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Cheating can be a wakeup call sometimes. Cheating is weak and cowardly, but it can open your eyes to the better alternative. I had an abusive ex named Drew who called me stupid on a regular basis, put down my friends, and got me to go on the pill b/c he liked to have raw sex and then cheated on me with his ex (also w/o a rubber), making no efforts no hide it. I stayed with him b/c I thought that I was too sensitive, and that becoming his ideal woman was a good thing b/c then I'd be strong. I was miserable.

    On Halloween, I ran into a classmate named Paul who admitted that he had been crushing on me. I spent the night in his arms (no sex or petting, but still cheating) and realized that I didn't have to be with a guy who didn't love or accept me, and that just because a guy was sweet didn't mean he was weak or desperate. I dumped Drew soon after, both from the realization that our relationship was shit and b/c I owed him the decency of dumping him after I cheated (I never told him, and he will never find out b/c it's too much fun to use his cheating against him ). Paul and I didn't work out, but it was a nice wakeup call that I could do so much better, and that there were people out there who loved and accepted me for who I was. Drew tried to get back with me several times by being on his best behavior, which dropped as soon as he got his pussy or if I agreed to get back with him. He tried to call a few weeks ago, and I screamed at him and told him that I would punch his teeth out if he approached me.

    I'm not proud that I cheated, especially b/c I used Paul.

    My advice to you is to ditch the deadbeat loser boyfriend and then take things slowly, to ensure that getting back with your ex isn't just a rebound. Good luck!

  11. #11
    tampafldancer
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    I personally don't blame you. Your current guy is a piece of work.

    If you really want to get back with your ex though, do it right! Does your ex know about your current guy?

  12. #12
    aussiepunkshocker
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Lol - it was obviously the right thing to do for you. if your not happy where you are, go for it (-:

  13. #13
    Senior Member RicanAsianMa's Avatar
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Okay...the thing is. I break it off with him and he just arrives out of no where. He lives with his family right next door. I live with my family. I'm not leaving anywhere because I HAVE plans in life. I'm not ditching everything for him. Technically, I believe we are not together. I feel like I need my own space.

    My ex knows about this guy and he's the sweetest. He's someone I can talk to and we've always been kinda close. But now, our relationship is changing and we are having feelings for each other once again. We didn't end our past relationships being mad at each other. It was mutual.

  14. #14
    Veteran Member Natalia108's Avatar
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    do what you feel is right .. well you did anyway .. if you cant be with the other guy then dont be with him but dont just go jumping into another relationship straight after your current one it wont work.. take some time out for yaself and think about what you really want

  15. #15
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Well, I think it is funny how so many think if a guy cheats then he is a scum bag goof ball. If a gal cheats then she is just "ready for some change."

    Thank God for KrazyJane's thoughtful and emotionally honest reply.

    Like most, I think it is time for you to go. If you were happy (with yourself or your partner) you wouldn't be doing such things.

    Maybe you are more ready for this guy from your past. Good luck!

  16. #16
    Featured Member Krazyjane's Avatar
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Quote Originally Posted by Deogol
    Well, I think it is funny how so many think if a guy cheats then he is a scum bag goof ball. If a gal cheats then she is just "ready for some change."
    One of the main resons I didn't tell Drew of my cheating was b/c two wrongs don't make a right. He'd cavort back with his "perfect" ex, rationalizing that she was a big part of his life, and that I'd just have to accept it. Underlying translation: I'm an egocentric bastard who gets what he wants, wherever he can get it. If I cheat on you, it's your fault that you're not providing me with the love and emotional support that I need. I asked him not to talk about her, even if it favored me, which was basically a license to cheat. He continued to talk about her, further illustrating that he was going to get what he wanted despite the cost of others' emotions.

    What kind of excuse could I give him for my actions? The underlying reasons for cheating was that we were both getting emotional satisfaction elsewhere. When it came down to that, we were both equally guilty. The circumstances might have been different, and I might have been abused, but neither of us were considerate of the emotions of the other when we were cheating.

    I'm not trying to rationalize the fact that I make him out to be the scumball, at least not consciously. Thanks for the compliment, by the way.

  17. #17
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Quote Originally Posted by Deogol
    Well, I think it is funny how so many think if a guy cheats then he is a scum bag goof ball. If a gal cheats then she is just "ready for some change."
    Can't use this case to make a double-standard point. Guy is a cheater - if she cheats in retaliation there's no double standard. It's just a crappy relationship that should be ended.


    Rican, I also agree you should just dump the bf. He's clearly not right for you and this type of game-playing, abusiveness, trash-talking and screwing around is definitely NOT a good environment for your son. Lose the loser.

    As far as the ex, like tampafldancer said, if you're gonna be with him, do it right.

    Good luck girl.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  18. #18
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    Default Re: I cheated...

    Well I dont know what to say but sounds like your relationship isnt a good one so maybe its best just to move on . I just wonder about your ex and trust issues as far as you cheated with him so whats going to stop you next time you are feeling down - you need to talk to your man before you take the cheating road .

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