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Thread: Husband Trouble

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    Default Husband Trouble

    Hi-My husband has been going to strip clubs for 20 years. I have not agreed with this behaviour only because of the sexual extras in some clubs. He has told me that he has never done anything like that but just goes in to have a couple of drinks. He also takes clients in and will pick up their tab for whatever. However, he does not tell me when he goes and has even lied about it because he says he knows I'll just get upset when there's nothing going on. I don't know whether to believe that he just has drinks or whether he is getting extras which I would consider cheating. He goes to clubs in the Toronto airport area. Any comments/insight would be appreciated. Thanks for listening.

  2. #2
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    It is all about if you trust your husband or not. Some people do just go have a drink.

  3. #3
    Sitri
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Yep, I always get extras and just say nothing is going on. It is a great way to cheat without long term consequences. Just $50, 15 minutes, and it's all taken care of.

    If I could just get Katrine to last longer dammit.

    Wink wink, nudge nudge.

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    Curious Guest SoCalRingo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    It is a trust thing. My wife knows that I will go on occasion with clients or to kill some time while on the road. There is also a trust factor. She knows that I will do nothing more than a table dance and doesn't consider it cheating. And I know that I love her very much and will do nothing more than a table dance.

    Hope that helps.

    - Ringo

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    Veteran Member alicia0033's Avatar
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    and you're married? CHEATER! i hope your wife finds out.

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    Veteran Member alicia0033's Avatar
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Quote Originally Posted by Sitri
    Yep, I always get extras and just say nothing is going on. It is a great way to cheat without long term consequences. Just $50, 15 minutes, and it's all taken care of.

    If I could just get Katrine to last longer dammit.

    Wink wink, nudge nudge.
    ^I meant the above quote for you.

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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Quote Originally Posted by TorontoGirl
    Hi-My husband has been going to strip clubs for 20 years. I have not agreed with this behaviour only because of the sexual extras in some clubs. He has told me that he has never done anything like that but just goes in to have a couple of drinks. He also takes clients in and will pick up their tab for whatever. However, he does not tell me when he goes and has even lied about it because he says he knows I'll just get upset when there's nothing going on. I don't know whether to believe that he just has drinks or whether he is getting extras which I would consider cheating. He goes to clubs in the Toronto airport area. Any comments/insight would be appreciated. Thanks for listening.
    Why dont you suggest that you would like to go with him to have fun(not to babysit him). If he is doing business with clients that would probably not be the time to go . But if you were to have a night together, go out, get dances and have fun, it would give you a better insight on strip clubs. Extras do go on SOMETIMES but not all dancers do this, just like not all guys cheat. It does come down to your trusting him BOTTOM LINE..

    Him not being honest with you is not cool. But in my experience I know more guys that have cheated or been propositioned to cheat when going out to a night club as opposed to a strip club.

  8. #8
    tampafldancer
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    alicia, he was kidding sweety.

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    Veteran Member Phedre's Avatar
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Honestly hun, it is way more likely that your husband will cheat on you in a night club than in a strip club.

    I DON'T think it's kosher at all that he lies to you but if you make it an issue every time he goes then he is going to end up lieing. Maybe you should go by yourself or with some friends for a night at your local SC. If you do please don't be the chick that sits and shit talks about the dancers. Keep an open mind. Think about how sexy or sensual the dancers moves are.

    Talk to some of the girls and tell them your hubby comes in and that it always makes you nervous. It is possible that he does go in for a few drinks and enjoys watching the women dance. Is that so unhealthy? If you leave the door open for him to be honest without you reacting jealously he may be more able to tell you the real [ulterior motive] reasons he goes if thats the case.
    Phedre
    ~ my very own pole dancer!

  10. #10
    Sitri
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Quote Originally Posted by tampafldancer
    alicia, he was kidding sweety.
    At least someone knows when I am kidding.... Thanks

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    Featured Member lopaw's Avatar
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    I dunno. I don't think this woman would be a good candidate to go to a SC, especially with the hubby. Judging by her post, there are major issues there, and I just can't envision a joyous, happy-go-lucky evening for her or the poor dancers that might happen to wander near. It might even make matters worse.

    Just my .02

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    Featured Member red red red's Avatar
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Check the credit card statements. If dude is spending over $600 at a "restaurant" you've never heard of, ask him about it.

    Don't go to a strip club unless you think there's something there you will enjoy too. You won't have fun, you'll just be casing the joint for someone you think your husband would like. The issue is between you and him, not strip clubs.

    You do NOT have to play "cool wife" and be okay with this. At least you're concerned. Most of the guys who end up being some dancer's regular have wives who don't give a shit.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Thanks very much for all your comments. I am planning on going (probably with my husband) to see what it's all about. I have never been. I certainly don't plan to harrass any dancers or talk badly about them. I am willing to buy them drinks. I would enjoy talking to them but am on the shy side and don't know if I could do that.
    I don't have a problem with him going in for a few drinks and watching the girls dance. Not at all. It's the "extras" that have me concerned. I realize not all clubs are like that but in Ontario, Canada I think a lot is allowed.
    It's his VISA statements that got me worried. I know when he took his client a couple of weeks ago the bill was $300. He said it was for the client with a girl because his business partner picked up the drinks tab. There was another entry on the VISA for about $120 from last month. That's what I saw but there's always paying cash which isn't traceable.
    Again, thanks for your comments. Keep them coming!

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    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    ^^^ well it is pretty easy to drop $300... $120... that's nothing. If there were big, big charges it would be different.

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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Quote Originally Posted by TorontoGirl
    I realize not all clubs are like that but in Ontario, Canada I think a lot is allowed.
    Hi TorontoGirl, I'm from Ontario myself and have been to a number of different clubs from Windsor to Toronto. Extras do vary from club to club and city to city. Where I'm from you won't get anything more than the occasional out-of-towner offering you to touch her breasts and that's not very often. T.O. does offer a lot more options. I had a dancer at a club on Yonge street tell me she was offended that I wasn't touching her! Imagine that.

    Anyway, I also bring a some of my clients to the local clubs and we do go for drinks and a little show. There are no extras on the menu so I can totally relate to someone who just likes to have a few drinks. Even if some of the girls at some of the clubs offer "extras" it doesn't mean your husband is partaking. That being said, there are also guys who look hard for the "extras".

    Which club near the airport, the Landing Strip?

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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    My wife lets me go and I tell here about it , its a controlled environment to her ,she would rather have me there then a bar plus I really hate bars now people are just rude they want to fight about everything . ( some bars are an exception )

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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Hi Techie-Thanks for your response. Yes one of the two clubs he goes to is the Landing Strip. The other is the Cannonball. What can you tell me about those two? What are they like??

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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Quote Originally Posted by TorontoGirl
    Hi Techie-Thanks for your response. Yes one of the two clubs he goes to is the Landing Strip. The other is the Cannonball. What can you tell me about those two? What are they like??
    I haven't been to the Landing Strip in years and I've never been to the Cannonball (Haven't even heard of it), but as my luck has it, I'm going to be in the airport area in a couple of weeks for a week. I certainly intend to take in some of the entertainment so I'll stop at one (or both) of these and see what happens!

    I can tell you I've been offered (and partaked in some) "extras" in downtown T.O. at the Zanzibar and Brass Rail but that was also a couple of years ago. No sex or blowjobs or anything like that. Just some touching, groping, those kind of things.

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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Hi Techie

    Let me know what these places are like although I plan to visit in the next couple of weeks. Since I'm going with my husband not sure I'll get the "full" picture. Or maybe I will.

  20. #20
    Sitri
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    TorontoGirl, you have a choice of going down two paths, you are either looking for information to cruxify him or to understand him and support him .
    It is basically a matter of trust for you. Does he love you or love you not. Understand that all men look and every one wants to be sexy.

    With women, it is easier to appeal to the opposite sex because you can dress up, look good and get the attention. Just walk down the street and you can see who is looking and who is not.

    With men, it is harder.to get that reinforcement. But, it is a lot safer to get it out of your system in a strip club than having an affair in the office or with the neighbor's wife.

    Your husband wants to feel wanted or prove he is still attractive to the opposite sex. Make him feel that way. Enjoy the visit with him, but be careful to not "judge" him or the dancers. Have fun...

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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Quote Originally Posted by TorontoGirl
    Hi Techie

    Let me know what these places are like although I plan to visit in the next couple of weeks. Since I'm going with my husband not sure I'll get the "full" picture. Or maybe I will.
    I went to the Cannonball on Thursday night and enjoyed it so much I went back on Friday. Dropped some big bucks, thanks for mentioning the name, I never even heard about it before.

    As far as what the place is like, I have no comment, I don't want to get anyone in trouble. I'm sure my lack of words speak loudly.

  22. #22
    Veteran Member vegasbebe's Avatar
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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Not to be a bitch, but please. So many wives have this idea in their heads that dancers are going to do dirty bad things to their husbands. Okay, extras are few and far between in most clubs. We're not whores, we are entertainers. What we do is ENTERTAINMENT.... We don't want to fuck your husband, we're just trying to take his money. Sorry, but it's the truth. Odds are ninety nine out of one hundred that nothing happens when he goes to a strip club. So quit worrying.

    Furthermore it sounds like you just have general trust issues with your husband...why are you spying on his credit card reciepts? If my husband did that to me, I would be furious. Maybe look deeper for the cause of your concerns....

    And on a final note, if your husband has a wandering eye, be happy he expresses it in a strip club, where nothing is going to happen, instead of going to a real bar and screwing some other girl.

    Relax!

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    Default Re: Husband Trouble

    Hi Vegesbebe-I live in the Toronto area and there are clubs here that offer "extras" regularly, ie., hj, bj. The club he goes to regularly is called the Cannonball(CB). I have spoken with 2 dancers in the past week that have told me this is a nasty club with "extras" going on all the time in the VIP. Both these ladies do not work there. The place has been frequently raided for the soliciting that goes on. That's not entertainment that's whoring. Probably there are dancers there that don't do that kind of thing but obviously it's common at CB. All clubs are different but that's what this one is like. That's why I have never liked him going. If he just goes to watch the show and have a few drinks then no problem.

    As I've said I never liked him going and I thought he had stopped about 6 years ago. But about 2 and a half years ago he didn't come home till 3 or 4 in the morning and I couldn't reach him on his cell. That's when I went into his wallet and found a VISA receipt for almost $900. I confronted him about his whereabouts but he said that he had been out with some customers and they ended up watching the hockey game at one of the guy's houses. He was so convincing that I would have believed him if I hadn't seen the receipt. There have been a few incidents since that when he hasn't come home. I told him if he does it again his stuff will be on the lawn. Every since the $900 I have been watching his VISA and bank statements occasionally. He said he doesn't hide them 'cause he has nothing to hide.

    You might ask how come I was "off the case" for a few years until 2 and a half years ago. I was busy having 2 babies, caring for them, working part-time and dealing with my father being diagnosed with Alzheimers. The night 2 and a half years ago when he went missing I remember quite well. I had to take the 3 year old and 1 year old to the walk-in clinic and deal with 2 sick little kids on my own.

    That's my story....Remember-old sins have long shadows.

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