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Thread: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

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    Veteran Member rain's Avatar
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    Default The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Let me preface this with saying that I've been through some pretty weird shit in my life, but this takes the cake. I hope this does not completely weird some of you out.

    I just moved into a new house with two of my friends from back home and three people I don't know very well. They all seemed to be very nice, and we are all getting along well.

    One of my roommates (who is a 29 year old male in graduate school at a local college) approached me the other day and asked me if I could help him with something. I said sure, and he started to tell me that when he was 22 he had a "break" (psychological term) after his mom left his dad. He told me he was schizophrenic. Anyway, he asked me if I could help him with his problem. He told me his therapist would write me a letter and put it in a packet.

    So he gives me the packet, and I have no idea what to expect. There's 100 dollars in the packet. The letter is written very unprofessionally and it instructs me to go buy some adult diapers, some baby toys and some soft pajamas. It has a "contract" written up by his "therapist" that says I'm to act as his "sitter;" the letter includes specific instructions to put a diaper on him at night and give him the baby toys. In the morning, I'm supposed to check if he has any accidents.

    I wrote to this "therapist's" email and said I had some major concerns and questioned her professionalism. One of the things that I had the biggest problem with was that she told me I had to assert some authority over my roommate and if he questioned that, I should threaten to tell everyone else in the house (5 people) about his accidents.

    I thought this was really cruel. She responded and said that she doesn't think it's a good idea for me to start a program like this now, in the midst of his midterm week.

    I just left it alone. Yeah, it was really weird, but I figured he just had some crackpot therapist.

    So anyway today I get another email suggesting I go through with this plan. She also told me when I gave my roommate back the packet (containing the letter and the 100 dollars) he took the money.

    I don't know why I didn't do this before, but I decided to check the IP addresses to see where the hell these emails were coming from. Also, the "therapist" had a hotmail account, which seemed incredibly unprofessional.

    So I checked the IP addresses using WHOIS IP - a great resource - and lo and behold, guess where the two emails were from? The first one was from MY ROOMMATE'S COLLEGE, and the second one was from SACRAMENTO, where my roommate is visiting his mom right now.

    SO HE WROTE THE LETTER AND THE EMAILS, PRETENDING TO BE A THERAPIST!

    I was so freaked out that he would try to trick me into this sick shit that I called in to work tonight. All my roommates are out of town right now so I have no one to talk to about this, so I called my friend (and one of my roommate's girlfriend) and she is going to come over and help me sort this shit out.

    Now, I don't know what to do. It's such a weird, sticky situation. On one hand, this 29 YEAR OLD is trying to trick me into putting diapers on him and acting like his babysitter - all in the name of "helping him!" Part of me thinks he should be arrested. And then part of me thinks that I could somehow just talk to him, be like "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" and take it from there...

    My best friend suggested that I print out all the emails, the IP addresses and get the letter from the packet back and have a house meeting. Bring it all to light. But it's strange, because 3 of the 4 people I live with are friends with him.

    I'm really freaked out.

    Did I mention this MAN is 29? I'm 21.

  2. #2
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Definitely a house meeting with the IP proof. Most people will read that letter and go "wha?" to begin with.

    If they "be fuckin wit you" they'll know the little joke is over. If not, then they probably need to know about this person living with them.

    Hope your bedroom has a lock on it and I would keep my toiletries in a morning bag under the bed.

  3. #3
    Veteran Member rain's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Yeah, I wrote back the "therapist" and said I needed the packet back. I feel like I need that original letter at the house meeting because it details all the fucked up diaper shit in it. I should have made a copy in the first place. I am getting a deadbolt before he comes back on Monday, and then I'm going to have the house meeting.

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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    I didn't get more than one line into your fourth paragraph before I knew what was going on here; I am surprised that you actually bought this for a little while.

    Those actions are those of a sexual predator, though: he is trying to get someone to titillate him without being honest, and you would have a case for sexual harrassment/assault if you wanted to go that route. I would talk to him alone first, offer him the chance to move the fuck out, and if he doesn't go for it, print out the emails (with the headers and other identifying information) and share with the house.

  5. #5
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Oh yeah, please, please write Dan Savage.

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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Yea I understood that instantly as well. Maybe you could try talking to one of the roomates that you were originally friends with first? How was this guy before the letters started? Other than this did he seem to be pretty "normal'? One way or the other, I would make sure you do not have to live with him. I also think it may be important to know one of his friends reactions, to make sure they are not weirdos who agree with him and his actions.
    YES I agree on the Dan SAvage line! He deals alot with people who have this being "nurtured" fetish. The fact that this guy tried to manipulate you in order to fulfill his fetish is awful. Dan would probably call him a coward or something for not being a man and seeking this satisfaction in an honest way.
    Good luck.

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    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Quote Originally Posted by Susan Wayward
    Oh yeah, please, please write Dan Savage.
    Definitely!

    What a loser. I would not even give him the courtesy of the "private" meeting first, I would jsut go ahead and out him. But I can abe a bitch sometimes.

    Good luck!


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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Here, I'll channel Dan Savage for you!

    Say to him,

    "I know you have emotional needs that are unusual and hard to get fulfilled, and you're expecting me to fulfill them because I'm in the sex industry." (I assume you're in the sex industry, since most of the people who post on this board are.) "But honestly, trying to lie and cheat me into doing this is just bad, not to mention that nobody with half a brain will buy that stupid crap. Here's a better way."

    Then give him the name of a local dominatrix.

  9. #9
    Miss. Kristina Lee
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    thats so damn creepy.

  10. #10
    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Go to the store and buy one of those big plush ken dolls. Put a diaper on it and a bottle and 100.00 in it. Then get the house together put it on the center of the table and say "Ok, someone at this table wants Ken to be HIM. Any guesses?"

    Hahah, Just trying to make light of a very serious situation.

    Truth is you should laugh. in 8 months when this guy is getting his diapers changed by a rough trick he paid named Dave, cause you wont do it, you'll just look back on this and laugh.

    Just keep a cool head, and do one thing, assess the violent nature of this guy before you do anything. If you decide he is naturally agressive don't do anything that can turn it to you.

    People are not ruled by their memories.

  11. #11
    God/dess scarlett_vancouver's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    To be fair, you guys figured it out early because of the way she wrote about it. ("The letter was written very unprofessionally...").

    The fact that this guy tried to manipulate you in order to fulfill his fetish is awful.
    Exactly. Don't feel bad for him. His fetish is not the problem- it may not be most people's cup of tea, but there are people into that, and he could have found them. The problem is that he lied and tried to manipulate you into doing something you weren't comfortable with.

    I don't know if a public shaming is the best way to go, though...I mean, that'll fuck him up, for sure, because you KNOW his guy friends will not react well to this. I think you should deal with it privately if at all possible. I'm not sure if police, or one-on-one confrontation is the best way to go...

    And just remember if you go one-on-one, that he might have a very strong interest in making sure you don't tell anyone else about this, so keep yourself safe.

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    God/dess Mr Hyde's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    here's what you should do...

    write the "therapist" back and tell "him" that you're willing to do it, but you're a little nervous about it and you need more money. Have the therapist tell your roommate you'll need 500 bucks to do it. Get the money, and then kick that freak out.

    OK, just kidding. Just kick him out.

  13. #13
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Well I am sorry to say that whack jobs like this make me very uncomfortable - how far will they go with their sexual needs - will he harm you ?? I dont know have you checked any of the registries to see if he has priors (Preditor). I would be a little concerned to the point I would at least call the Police and see if they can run some kind of check on this guy - he is living with you ! Dont let your guard down take care of the problem immediately please ! I am not concerned about his feelings I am more concerned with your safety .

  14. #14
    tampafldancer
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    lol hyde, you rock!

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    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    that is one of the most whacked out things I've ever heard... the fact that he got you involved in his weird and sick fetish without your actual consent is beyond rude and deserves a payback. But I am concerned for your safety. You should NOT be living in the same house with this nut, imho.... if he's capable of what you described who knows what he's capable of?

  16. #16
    God/dess Mr Hyde's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    ok I wasn't totally kidding...heh...what a freak

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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    He needs real help...talk to him, personally and not in a group session. offer to take him for help...be his friend, but GET HIM INTO THERAPY. If he is a predator, it's best for potential victims he be under control before they are hurt. If he's just trying to put 1 over on you or get in your pants, then that will be clear soon enough

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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Whoa, how fucked up and tottaly that would freak me out. From other posters; I had no idea that was sexual predator behaviour.

    After speaking to him privately, talking with the roomates, going to the police, maybe trying to get him evicted if he doesnt volunteer to leave...I would move out and awya from this person. If you do move out...make sure the other roomates know of his behaviour and the police should know too. They cant arrest him for asking for a fetish to be lived out but it can be documented so that there will be a record of his attempt.
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  19. #19
    Tart
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    holy hell!! what a nutcase

    Okay first off lets say he seriously does have a mental issue like he claims

    which means he's unbalanced which i think he's proven already.

    BE VERY CAREFUL HOW YOU APPROACH HIM

    this is an unrational person in the fullest.

    I would wait till house meeting without ..and i stress without him.

    seriously, because if he has the illness he claims then he's highly paranoid as it is. although im sure he's on meds to control this.

    Man, personally if i were in your shoes i'd move the fuck outta there.

    I had ONE person in my life whom i unfortunatly worked with , she has both schizo and a crack addiction ..go figure. this woman wrecked me and set out to harm me.

    So ..god a deadbolt might help but keep all your belongings in your room at all times, lock up your window ( so he can't go outside and get in that way ) and DO NOT be alone with him

  20. #20
    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    For one, it doesn't sound like he's actually likely to be schizophrenic, any more than the originator of email is actually his "counselor".

    It does sound like he has major issues with women.

    But if you totally trash his life because of his badly attempted cry for help, those issues will get worse and not better -- and they may turn violent.

    Think of it. If you're a fetishist freak with consent issues and nobody knows it, you're pretty tormented, but you have a lot to hide and a lot to lose. If you're outed as a fetishist freak and your life is completely turned upside-down -- you don't have anything to lose then, and you might be willing to really hurt someone to get what you want. After all, people are all assholes, right? Look what they did to you!

    If you tell him he has issues -- and, perhaps, blackmail him into getting help, whether from a dominatrix (dommes are often essentially counselors) or an actual therapist, I think he'll be extremely grateful ten years down the road -- and far less likely to attempt any kind of non-consensual sexual activity with anyone.

  21. #21
    Veteran Member rain's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    OK gals, this is what I did. I confronted him on the phone about this. I told him that I know he was the one writing the emails, that he concocted the entire plan himself, and that I notified two of my other roommates about this. I know for a fact that he's schizophrenic. My roommates have confirmed this. I told him on the phone that I know that his behavior is not under his control right now, that he needs to face himself. He broke down and said that yes, he was crying out for help. He's coming back to town tomorrow around 8 PM. There's no way I'll be alone with him. I am even going to see his real therapist tomorrow with copies of the emails he wrote.

    Two of my female roommates, however, are adamant about kicking him the fuck out.

    Anyway, drama will certainly ensue. I just wanted to make the right decision here. I didn't want him to freak out. But, it's not really my issue. I didn't even know him that well before all this happened. My other roommates were actually friends with him. I'm taking time out of my day tomorrow to go talk to his therapist and then I'll figure out exactly what plan of action I should take after that.

    This is so fucked up...

  22. #22
    God/dess Mr Hyde's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    You could just treat him like a baby.

    I would draw the line on changing his diaper though.

  23. #23
    God/dess KamrynAnne's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    this cat needs to be put in to the looney bin asap.... mabye they will change his diapers there...

  24. #24
    Veteran Member fifi's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Having worked as a Dominatrix for many years before going into dancing, I knew immediately what was up. I'd kick the guy out. Not because of his fetish, but because of how he tried to go about having it satisfied- with manipulation and lies. Sure you feel bad for him, you know he has serious mental conditions, etc. But that's not going to disapear anytime soon. He'll need years of serious help, and in the meantime, you can bet he'll pull a lot more sh*t. Besides, if you just let it go, you're sending the message that what he did wasn't THAT BAD. He'll do something again. Get him out of your life for good.

  25. #25
    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: The most fucked up thing that's ever happened to me

    Wow, old thread! But... Holy. Fucking. Shit!
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