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Thread: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    So I called up Pirate's Cove a couple weeks ago and asked when they do their auditions, they said to come in Fri or Sat between 5 and 9.

    Called them up tonight to verify that I could audition this evening, they said "oh, the manager's not here, sorry, call his cell phone and find out when he'll be around". No answer, no idea when they're running auditions.

    So I made an appointment with Dino's Inn, which purportedly hires newbies of any size. According to reviews here, though, they DON'T ALLOW HUSTLING. I don't think I want to work there for more than a week -- but I'll work there if it's what I can get.

    I'm not really all that fat! I have a little belly. I'm not too fat for softcore shoots, and most of the photographers I send my pics to are interested (and my main picture is even out of date, I'm flabbier in it.) But I've been working out for a month and a half, and the little belly hasn't gone away although it's gotten smaller, and I feel like if another place refuses to take me FOR LACK OF EXPERIENCE or because I'm too "heavy"(! I'm 5'6" and 138 pounds) I'll just get totally run down about it, because it's a big effort for me to get out to clubs without a car.

    I've only auditioned once here, but I previously auditioned in two other places and nobody hired me. So I'm really nervous. I don't want to try out anywhere that's not really newbie-friendly because I'll just burn out on it if I don't succeed soon.

    Grr, arr, I'm going crazy. Does anyone know of any other newbie-friendly Portland places that are low or no-contact?
    Last edited by thechaosfairy; 10-15-2005 at 08:24 PM.

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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Your height and weight sound proportionate to me--I am 5'6" and 140 on a good day. Without a photo we really can't tell you what might be a stumbling block at the clubs. If you're comfortable posting one, even temporarily, that might help.

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    God/dess colleen's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Strip clubs are jsut falky like that. I have had that experience of "The hiring manager is here--oh wait, he really isn't." Quite a few times. It was starting to feel personal, but actaully I think it was just disorganization and flakyness on the part of the clubs. It's no wonder so many girls don't treat stripping liek a real job--the club personnel don't treat it like a real business!

    Don't take it personally. But it was VERY smart of you to call and confirm.


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    When you perform... you are out of yourself--larger and more potent, more beautiful. You are for minutes heroic. This is power. This is glory on earth. And it is yours, nightly.

    --Agnes De Mille

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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Yeah, I'm glad I did, otherwise I'd have taken the bus out to fuck-all and made a fool of myself for no reason. :-)

    Bodywise -- I think I found the problem! What's been puzzling me is that my tummy's not so bad -- and I assumed I had nice thighs, because I used to, but I guess the fat I've been dropping at the gym has been leaving in pieces. Which is to say, I was trying on outfits today in front of a full-length mirror, and suddenly discovered a mass of cellulite that wasn't there before on the outsides of my thighs.

    So I bought some thigh-high fishnets which I'm hoping will cover it up. I'll also see about that CLA stuff, even though it still seems a little dodgy to me from the studies I've read. (The short version is that it raises some heart disease markers and lowers others, and while it prevents cancer it also sometimes raises insulin resistance. It sounds like it may do different things in different people.)

    Anyway, wish me luck.

    Oh, and another question -- UJ's said I was obviously inexperienced from the way I moved. What can I do to not be? I'm a very instinctive dancer and I think I probably moved way too quickly to the music. They also said I should hang onto the pole more. Are there any other beginner mistakes in dancing style that you regularly see?

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    God/dess holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    There might be something in that last post of yours - you said you are a very "instinctive dancer" and may have moved too fast. Sometimes I've noticed newbies tend to "dance" to much. Like how they would with friends or alone or something. I think the trick for you may be to just focus on the stripping aspect more. If you get the flirting down and forget about performing for now, or "dancing", but really just remember - eye contact, smiling and provacatively and slowly taking off each piece of clothing. I know a dancer who works at Union Jacks who literally stands on stage and slowly takes off clothes. And she makes money. I couldn't figure her out and then one night I was there and she locked eyes with me and I pretty much wet my panties (and I'm a straight girl). So I think a flirty attitude and eroticism in your audition are huge things to focus on.
    And at the few auditions I've done I'll make sure to never have an empty rack. For mine, I was on a second stage each time so it'd be empty, but I'd make sure to do some flirting before hand with someone and bring them up to the rack with me. I don't know, it helped me, just to have someone to focus on and play off of.
    As far as clubs to auditon at - I'd pick up an Exotic Magazine. They're available in every portland strip club. It'll give you a good idea of all the clubs in Portland. The places that will probably hire you right away are a lot of the southeast clubs; Tommy's (1,2 and 3), Pallas, 92nd Street and a few others - but I don't want to recommend them to you.
    Lastly (I know this is long! But you're my Portland girl), I know of one stripper class in town. You can find it advertised on craigslist under classes. And they teach real basic stuff, and a few beginner pole moves. I don't think the instructor has actually ever been a stripper before - but it may be helpful if you just want to practice on a stage with a pole.

    Okay I'm done. Best of luck!
    I'm confused, but the Chewbacca Truffle Shuffle cleared it up. - Emily

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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Thank you so much, holiday! I'll take your advice to heart.

    I have an audition tonight. It's in two hours.

    Yeah, I've thought about the stripper classes, but I've already put so much money into this that I don't feel like spending more until I start seeing returns. I'm still considering it, and I'll probably join the next class whether or not I get hired tonight.

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    Veteran Member LusciousLyzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Hey, if you decide to take those stripper classes, let me know. I don't know that I need them, still haven't danced yet, on the count that I now have a boyfriend that says he wouldn't care if I danced, but from the way he says it, I can't really tell if he's just saying that because he doesn't want to lose me, or he just really doesn't mind, when guys look at me and he catches them, he gets jealous, so i don't know, but I've told him about the classes and told him that i think it would just be fun, but haven't gone, it just sounds like fun to me!

    Anyways, Good Luck on your audition!!!

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    Senior Member Schea's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    what area of portland are you looking to work in??

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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Inner NE/SE, ideally. Downtown also works, but I haven't tried the clubs there yet because the ones I've heard of are all apparently hard to get shifts at.

    Oh, so today's audition went pretty well! I think I got in, but I'm not sure; the bartender says she has to check with the manager. I really hope so, even though I've heard the place isn't great money; a few weeks of work will really help me to look and act more like someone the higher-end clubs want to hire.

    Thanks again for the advice about being less "dancy" and more slow and sensual, Holiday, I think it really helped; one of the customers said he was surprised that I was new. :-)

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    God/dess holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Yay!!!! Congrats. You should feel really good about auditioning . I'm sure you got hired (and if you didn't, you will somewhere). But let us know how your first shifts go.
    I'm confused, but the Chewbacca Truffle Shuffle cleared it up. - Emily

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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Don't work at Pirate's Cove! I worked there for a year and a half for some stupid reason. Go check out my new review in the "Clubs & Reviews" section.

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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Thanks, Anna! Your reviews have been my beacon of light through this whole process, since I was browsing through a thread one day and saw you mention in a post that you weren't very skinny, and since my failed auditions have largely been "get more toned and come back later", I figured a club that would hire you would be willing to hire me.

    I want to thank you, seriously, emphatically. I felt kinda totally lost for a while. So many cities are totally different. Digging up some of your posts gave me a good idea of what working in a small local divey place would be like, and what I could do to get myself in.

    I was dubious of Dino's Inn but your review was good and, like, three other people said I'd love it, so I finally tried out there . . .

    . . . AND GOT HIRED!

    Apparently if there was a "no salesmanship" rule, there isn't now -- I asked dancers and read the rule sheet, you're only not supposed to be obnoxious about it. And the music selection is amazing -- better than the music selection at Union Jack's, which was supposed to be real great but the DJ said someone had erased half the computer. It's cozy and laid-back, and I mean to write my own review after I work there for a few weeks.

    I only have one shift this week, but I have four days of on-call and the manager said people keep calling in sick a lot. She also said that the schedule was about to be rearranged to create more shifts total.

    I'm seriously looking forward to my new job.

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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Well...good luck at Dino's! I like it there but it's REALLY hard to make money there! It's unfortunate, because I actually really like the club itself, the way it looks and stuff. But people do not go in there to spend money, the customers are like 90% just guys who work in the neighborhood and stop by for a beer or two. I worked there steadily for about eight months and very rarely sold table dances (seriously probably six TOTAL! Although there really was a rule against asking for table dances before). The only way I ever had good shifts was when my regulars came in and tipped me well on stage. I mostly stopped working there last fall, and I'm not really sure what it's like now, but from what I've heard from a few girls it doesn't sound like the money has improved. I'm actually pretty suprised that you've been turned down from other clubs. I read where you posted your height and weight in a thread somewhere and you actually sound pretty average-sized for most of the clubs I've ever been into in Portland. In fact, Union Jacks has had a dancer who is my size (about 20lbs heavier than you) forever, but maybe they only want one non-skinny girl at a time or something stupid like that. Anyway, good luck. I bet I'll meet you sometime! I still pick up a shift every couple months at Dino's. I'm also looking for a new club now that I'm not working at Pirate's Cove anymore, so if you start somewhere else and really like it you should let me know.

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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Thanks for the info, and I will. If you start somewhere else and really like it, will you let me know, too? :-)

    I was only turned down at UJ's (the other naysays were in two different cities and a while back) but I noticed I was starting to get frustrated and crazy about this so I knew I wanted to get hired somewhere else. I honestly don't care if I only make stage tips; DI is already giving me experience and a really cozy place to start dancing and tone up, and I'm pretty sure that after no more than a month I'll no longer be an obvious newbie and have a better go at trying out wherever I want to. I think maybe a lot of places just don't want a non-skinny and inexperienced girl.

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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Oh, hey -- for those of you who wanted to see a picture of me, I just put one in my avatar, and uploaded a few to the gallery!

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    Senior Member Schea's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Congrats!!! yeah it took me a few times to find a club that i like and did well in. I started out at DV8 b/c my roommate bartends there then moved to Cabaret downtown, and now Im at Exotica but only work once a month since I moved back down to Eugene for school. Best to ya!!!

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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    I'll be joining you all at the end of November; can't wait to be out there. Hopefully I can incorporate visiting you all into my club reconnaissance mission.

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    Featured Member thechaosfairy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Frustrated and ranty in Portland

    Hooray! P-town is a fantastic place, and I'll be happy to show you the general highlights of my area, if you'd like.

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