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Thread: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

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    Member Raven Z's Avatar
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    Default My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    So I'm trying to hustle, and one particular guy catches my eye. He's older about mid-40's, drinking a bear and looking at me as i pass by, so i do a turn around and sit down with him.

    We talk for a while and he seems slightly drunk(ok, i admit, i'm niave and can't really tell but he seems just slightly to me at the time), i talk him into buying a dance but he wants to move somewhere else where we're not in the middle of the floor.so we go to this dark corner and talk for ANOTHER two songs all the while with me prompting him and trying to get him to let me dance for him for the next song. I'm especially wanting to hurry it up now because he's been getting grabby and talking about his "womb broom" mustache and how he knows how to please a woman.

    As soon as i start dancing for the bastard he goes seriously overboard! wipping his hand up my crotch and continually touching my thighs the entire time and trying to touch my nipples and trying to pull me down into his lap. and he just wouldn't STOP doing it! And what is it with these guys wanting to talk to you while you're dancing? I mean, come on! you're spending good money for a nice fantasy dance from a girl who's supposed to be 'getting into you' and showing how much she is by dancing for you. Why spoil it by asking for more by talking and distracting her from showing you her good parts??? Or by asking for more and she keeps saying no? that doesn't seem like a wise thing to do with your money if you ask me.

    So I end up telling him by the beggining of the song that it's going to be extra if he keeps doing that, he says ok and we say $40. but i still keep fighting off his hands from my cunt ("oh i know you like it baby. HA HA HA") and my breasts and i've already let him get away with touching my thighs which is usually an iffy part of me. since i won't let him touch my goods (in other words i won't let him treat me like a piece of man handleing meat) he says it's down to $30. i say fine, and continue to fight off his hands and remind AGAIN during the song, that it's $30 for being a grabby prick (ok, i said it nicer than that) so he'd remember, which he did.

    But this guy's still in the mind set that i'm just a piece of flesh for his touching pleasure. As a result it did end up being a shitty dance seeing as i had to keep focusing on grabing his hands away from my body and attempting to tell him no, no, no, no, and no in nice ways.

    What really sucked was that (i don't recall being forwarned that i was next on stage) immediatly after my dance was over, the DJ called me up to the stage!!! So i had to excuse myself very quickly ( i was a bit lost as to what to do really) and ran to go up stage and told the DJ that i didn't get my money from the guy yet and sorry i was late and didn't know i was next.

    I didn't know what happened but i can only assume the DJ took care of it because the guy came up and gave me a $20 and then tried to give me only $3 more!!! and i KNEW the guy had money because there were 2 more $20 in his hands and he had the NERVE to ask me if $23 was ok or enough because he didn't have change!!!! So in my best sultry sweety voice i said 'oh sweety, why don't you go get some change and bring me back the other $7?'

    his responce? "You're an ASS, you know that?" ummm, exuse me? I'M the ass? uh, yeah, right, ok.

    Anyways he digs back into his wallet and pulls out a ten. being the nice gal that i am even AFTER being called an ass, i went to give him back his $3 in exchange so that it was the price we agreed on. he said forget it and i'm pretty sure he left the club and didn't like the action he DIDN'T get at the club. hopefully i'll never see his ugly mug ever again. But i got my money and i got extra points for having to dance for an asshole! (dances were suppost to be $20) overall, i think it was a victory.... except that i keep thinking about the jack-ass. sigh...

    ok, rant over. blah.

    Oh, and i did tip the DJ on the spot after i got off of the stage, and gave thanks.
    Your local vegan lover.

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  2. #2
    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Well, he won't be the last a-hole, that's for sure... in hindsight, I wonder if you are thinking that instead of asking for ten dollars more, you should have just blown him off... was the money really worth the aggravation?

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    Member Raven Z's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    To be honest, i don't know. I'm still new to this and learning my boundries and i certianly don't know how to handle the a-holes, yet. But i shall learn.

    Actually, now that I think about it, do y'all have any input on how maybe i could have handled myself better? To be honest he just seemed like a hands-on customer i could handle before i started dancing for him, then he got really grabby. But i guess i saw my time i spent with him as an investment and wanted my money, especially seeing as i was already dancing. i don't know. any advice?

    And please keep in mind i'm extremely new to this, yesterday was only my second day.
    Your local vegan lover.

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    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    I'd leave it to the dancers to advise you how to handle it, they know better than I... all I can say is that there is no doubt some other guy out there wanting to give you money who is not gonna be an a-hole about it...

  5. #5
    Cally
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Kick him in the nuts!
    Okay seriously? If your not comfortable dancing for a customer, end the dance. You will make up for the money with another customer later on. Its not worth you getting upset over and risk getting yelled at by some asshole manager who doesnt beleive you were fighting the guys hands off.

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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Don't bother with "extra" charge again. You are only going to get labelled as an extras girl. If you aren't comfortable with what the cust is doing for standard price, then cut the dance off and walk away. You will find a gentleman and you WILL escape with your dignity.

    I had a few situations like you in the beginning, it gets better, and worse. Where are you dancing in Texas?

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
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  7. #7
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Million dollar advice here:

    Next time you meet this guy's twin, whisper soft & sexy in his ear, "I've got something special for you." Then jam your knee or heel into his crotch. Make it so no one can tell it was deliberate. Even if he complains you won't be fired because it's such a dumb scenario & the club still wants your stage fee & tip out.

    Guys like that deserve a pointed lesson.

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    Featured Member lunchbox's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine
    Where are you dancing in Texas?
    Sounds like Houston to me.

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    Veteran Member calliope7's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    First thing: after you get a guy back in vip, do NOT let him wait to start the dance! Its one thing to wait for the beginning of the next song, but don't let him sit there and be like "Oh I'm not ready to start yet." He's seriously trying to just get some free time and groapings off of you.

    It will get better, you'll learn how to handle these guys better and nip their bullshit in the bud more quickly or just walk away. I don't quite know how to explain it, but I started over two months ago and somehow the molestation attempts have seriously decreased since then. Its probably the more confident and in control attitude I've developed from having some experience. The more a guy feels that you're a pro and in charge, the less likely he is to try to take advantage of you (not that you won't still get those guys though).

    Good luck and I hope things get easier for you!

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    Member Raven Z's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    I'm in Austin.

    And thank you for the advice, i'll be sure not to charge 'extra' again. I'll just walk away.. maybe give a warning or two, then leave if he doesn't stop. The last thing i want is to be labeled an 'extra' girl. **shudder**

    So what if i offer the next song to be our dance song he says no, and then says no again for the song after that but keeps telling me he wants a dance? should i be blunt and tell him to let me dance on the next song or i'll have to go back to work? or say time is money? i mean, how exactly is a smooth way of stating this without ruining the mood or completely turning him off from buying a dance from me?
    Your local vegan lover.

    Live and let live.

  11. #11
    buffie06
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    get your money up front and warn to leave if he doesn't stop trying to maul you, seriously you will soon be able to tell who you need to get your money up front from. Usually if you can tell someone is drunk already, just stay away unless they are throwing money at you. They are most likely to be grabby and to rip you off as well.

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    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by Raven Z
    So what if i offer the next song to be our dance song he says no, and then says no again for the song after that but keeps telling me he wants a dance? should i be blunt and tell him to let me dance on the next song or i'll have to go back to work? or say time is money? i mean, how exactly is a smooth way of stating this without ruining the mood or completely turning him off from buying a dance from me?
    Once he says no, you should just tell him you'll catch up with him later when he's ready, and go. Just be nice about it and don't worry about being smooth. He probably wants you more than you want his twenty bucks. Especially considering he'll never have you, that gives you the power here.

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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    All good sugestions here. One thing though,if a guy wants to talk during his dance let him,its always easier to just nod your head or what ever and give a shitty dance on top of it. I love guys who just want to talk during dances,it makes my job alot easier.

  14. #14
    Senior Member DancerSarah's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    1.) Get your $ upfront
    2.) one warning is all he should get
    3.) walk out if you feel uncomfortable
    4.) if he is that bad tell management and have him thrown out

    Always remember this is a job, if you worked at burger king you would'nt let a guy come behind the counter and make his own sandwhich just because he insisted would you? You are a godess. Don't put up with cheap assholes treating you like dirt.
    So sexy almost evil






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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Getting $ upfront at all times is going to hurt your business. Once you have him in a prime corner, begin to dance immediately, if he wants to wait until the next song, fine, but THAT IS IT. If he keeps dangling that carrot in front of you, its going to just piss you off when you realize he is trying to mindfuck you. Then your night will be shot and you will overall make less money, believe me on this one. Nothing pisses me off more than knowing my time was wasted when in hindsight, I KNEW that I should have been more forward.

    I am in Austin, danced here for a long time. PM me if you have any specific questions on specific clubs.

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

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    Veteran Member calliope7's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by Raven Z
    So what if i offer the next song to be our dance song he says no, and then says no again for the song after that but keeps telling me he wants a dance? should i be blunt and tell him to let me dance on the next song or i'll have to go back to work? or say time is money? i mean, how exactly is a smooth way of stating this without ruining the mood or completely turning him off from buying a dance from me?
    Once you're back in vip, you shouldn't have to wait for him "to be ready" for a dance. He already indicated his readiness by going back there to begin with. Don't wait for him to tell you to start, just do it. If he's a chatty guy he can just continue to babble at you once the dance actually starts if he really needs to.

    Honestly a lot of guys try to be manipulative with girls when they are new. I really wish I had had more warning myself when I started out as well. Just work on developing an air with guys that says you're busy and valuable and don't have time for their bullshit.

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    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    1. tell him that whether you are dancing or not he is being charged for the time in VIP.
    2. Drunk men = hyper toddlers. You need to tell them how it is going to be. (ie; I'll dance the next song for you. You are not allowed to touch me where my bikini covers.) If they break the rules you have laid down for them, in a stern voice correct the unwanted behavior. (ie; I told you not to toch me there, don't make me tell you again!) If he does it again exclaim, "that's it, I'm getting a bouncer!"

    The customer may throw a fit, or he may appologize and leave quietly. If he throws a fit, have the bouncer collect the cost of the dance, and give the bouncer half of it. That way the bouncer will be in your corner every time you have to deal with this situation. And the customer will think twice before trying those moves on another dancer. You may not ever have him as a customer again, however, but would you really want him as one?


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


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    Member Raven Z's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Thank you all for your advice!!! I certainly will know how to handle custys who mind fuck with me now.

    I just have to say, that though i haven't been part of this communtiy for very long, that i do find it very comforting and full of helpful advice!

    Thank you all for being there for the newbies!!!!

    ::HUGS FOR ALL!::
    Your local vegan lover.

    Live and let live.

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    God/dess kitana's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Well, one more little tidbit of advice if you don't mind.

    If you even think for one second that a custy is going to be like that again, (after a while you can kinda tell who will and who won't) bring a pretty scarf or handcuffs and tie the bad boy up. We have a rail across the back of the booth at head lvl, and I will totally tie a guys hands up there if he gets too out of line.

    I agree with Kat, sometime it is a bad thing to ack for money upfront. (Specially if they are planning to do many dances with you).

    Sorry you had to deal with that, and good luck!

    And remember , if they are trying to grab your boobs, that means they aren't touching your kitty!!! (Bad, I know but....)
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    Veteran Member Angel1112's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    always get your money up front. If a customer trys to get nasty with you during the dance after you've told him no and he won't behaive..just walk away.

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    Member CaliDancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    why dont you get the money before you do a dance?

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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    a great way to keep grabby guys in line is to get his hands/arms under your knees. that allows you to hold him down. or you could always just knee him in the nuts....oops!!!
    The Blonde Geisha

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    God/dess kitana's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    Quote Originally Posted by CaliDancer
    why dont you get the money before you do a dance?
    Because sometimes if it's a high-roller, he wants to do more than one dance.

    And it's kinda like an insult that they have to pay before every dance they do, as well as being a pain especially if they are doing many dances.

    I always check before the dance and remind them how much it is. And I always re-check again after every three (3) dances. Our dances are $30 each, so after racking $100 (3 dances plus $10 tip, lol) I always check to see if they are ready and have the funds.
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  24. #24
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    wtf? Next time, stop the dance, take your $20, and move on.

  25. #25
    Member CaliDancer's Avatar
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    Default Re: My first ass-hole custy (rant)

    thats what i used to think when i started dancing...that it would insult them if i asked them for the money ahead.but just tell them that it's the club's policy and thats the rules....thats what i do and it works

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