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Thread: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

  1. #26
    Featured Member kikin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    This is the exact dichotomy in the inconsistent application of values and morals that got me so confused when I first started reading and posting here. I always thought dancers would be more open-minded and tolerant than the mainstream population. I guess I was way off in my thinking. Nevertheless, I continue to find this phenomenon perplexing and yet intriguing at the same time. I shall enjoy reading some more.

  2. #27
    Featured Member MadisonM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    I don't mind when my boyfriend goes out to a different club with his friends while I'm working. He's not allowed to be in my club while I'm working, so if he wants to go out to a different club with his friends, I really don't care. I trust him, and I don't mind. If he went to a different club by himself, then that's different. If it's a guys night out, that's one thing. Going to a different strip club by himself just seems different to me. But that's just me I guess.

  3. #28
    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Actual conversation that I had with a new dancer last night:

    Dancer: So, do you have a girlfriend?
    Me: Oh, no hon. If I had one, I certainly wouldn't be here.
    Dancer: Well thats the great thing about dating a stripper.
    Me: What's that great thing?
    Dancer: That she wouldn't mind you going to strip clubs.
    Me: Really? Wow, that's interesting.

    I so had to hold it in.
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

  4. #29
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    I don't mind him going to clubs, but then I don't mind him getting the occasional play on the side either. I don't demand monogamy, I demand HONESTY. Lies and sneaking around are what destroy relationships.

    I enjoy watching him get lapdances and have bought him a couple. Once when I wanted to play around with another girl at the club, he bought a two-girl dance from both of us and I had much more fun than him.

  5. #30
    Veteran Member susie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah
    I don't mind him going to clubs, but then I don't mind him getting the occasional play on the side either. I don't demand monogamy, I demand HONESTY. Lies and sneaking around are what destroy relationships.

    I enjoy watching him get lapdances and have bought him a couple. Once when I wanted to play around with another girl at the club, he bought a two-girl dance from both of us and I had much more fun than him.
    Thats it, do what you will as long as it harms none Lies hurt!
    Susie

  6. #31
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    The reason some girls feel uncomfortable with their guy going to SCs without feeling like she's making any moral compromise to the relationship by working at one, is that for her it's work/business and for him it's pleasure. There's just a huge difference between going to work and going for fun. And we do know what some girls will do for money, and it makes a girl feel a bit uncomfortable to think of some skanky chick trying to get dirty with her man!

    I don't mind my guy going occasionally, but if he gets private dances I do get slightly jealous ONLY because I didn't get to participate in the fun

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  7. #32
    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by kikin
    This is the exact dichotomy in the inconsistent application of values and morals that got me so confused when I first started reading and posting here.
    How does her dissaproval imply that she isn't applying her own values and morals in her decision? Do you think that we all think that stripping, and the associated con game, is moral? Is being a societally-maligned outsider something we value for ourselves? Does a stripper internalize her value as a potential political pawn when the police department decides to do a politician a favor? Everyone is different, but our actions often conflict with our beliefs.

    But really, its quite simple. Club regulars, for the most part, are considered a mockery of a man (MANY exceptions here, don't get your panties all wadded up your hairy cracks guys!) I both pity and deride many club regulars, and don't want MY man to be considered a cuckhold that another dancer is pilfering. Does this make sense? Is it logical? I could give a fuck!!

    Go with your buddies, go when you're traveling for an extended period, go for an occasion......but sitting in a club several times a week RIL with another girl or three trying to fleece your manhood, oh HELL NO!!!

    So I bet you are a nice sweet boy and she doesn't want to:

    a)Lose a good thing
    b)Watch you get treated like an ATM and then disposed of......

    "Have you ever been to American wedding? Where is the vodka, where's marinated herring?" - GB
    "And do the cats give a shit? No, they do not. Why? Because they're cats."-from The Onion

    Quote Originally Posted by Mia M
    If a cupcake was tossed at me... well, I'd only be upset if it missed my mouth

  8. #33
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    All right, the Ukrainian just laid a bomb down on you, yeeeah!
    It boils down to economics- if the couple consisting of (1) man and (1) stripper are pooling their resources, and man causes joint funds to drain back into the SC industry, the stripper feels like her efforts are being undermined. We get fleeced enough as it is by the clubs.
    Of course, some women are smart & won't bother to give a man anything, period.

  9. #34
    God/dess threlayer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Seems to me that if a guy gets enough great sex and loving, he shouldn't need to go to strip clubs. (Unless he likes to study anatomy.) Fantasy is a pretty far cry from orgasms.
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

  10. #35
    Moderator yoda57us's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by threlayer
    Seems to me that if a guy gets enough great sex and loving, he shouldn't need to go to strip clubs. (Unless he likes to study anatomy.) Fantasy is a pretty far cry from orgasms.
    That's a great concept but it's a total myth. A huge number of men who go to clubs, flirt with strippers and maybe even buy lap dances are in long term relationships. Trying to blame the average male's wandering eye and the need for a little strange once in a while on the woman at home is an easy cop out. For most guys strip clubs have a lot more to do with ego than with orgasms.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

  11. #36
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    That's a great concept but it's a total myth. A huge number of men who go to clubs, flirt with strippers and maybe even buy lap dances are in long term relationships. Trying to blame the average male's wandering eye and the need for a little strange once in a while on the woman at home is an easy cop out. For most guys strip clubs have a lot more to do with ego than with orgasms.
    Truth.

    Strip clubs have never been about sex for me.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  12. #37
    God/dess threlayer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Yes, I know all that. I just don't know why it is so. For me, I just like the anatomy.
    I loved going to strip clubs; I actually made some friends there. Now things are different for the clubs and for me. As a result I am not as happy.

    Customers are not entitled to grope, disrespect, or rob strippers. This is their job, not their hobby, and they all need income. Clubs are not just some erotic show for guys to view while drinking.

    NOTE: anything I post here, outside of a direct quote, is my opinion only, which I am entitled to. Take it for what you estimate it is worth.

  13. #38
    Moderator yoda57us's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by threlayer
    Yes, I know all that. I just don't know why it is so. For me, I just like the anatomy.
    Oh trust me, I like the anatomy as well! We all have our reasons for going and different criteria for what constitutes a great visit. If your having a good time, not spending money you don't have, and respect both yourself and the ladies, that's all that matters.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

  14. #39
    Featured Member kikin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us
    ...If your having a good time, not spending money you don't have, and respect both yourself and the ladies, that's all that matters.
    That's all fine and dandy...except that the dancers have very little respect for us. They view us as a bunch of lame suckers to be pilfered and then discarded when the $$$ runs out--did you see Katrine's take on this? I'm requoting it below. Very interesting....

    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine
    But really, its quite simple. Club regulars, for the most part, are considered a mockery of a man (MANY exceptions here, don't get your panties all wadded up your hairy cracks guys!) I both pity and deride many club regulars, and don't want MY man to be considered a cuckhold that another dancer is pilfering. Does this make sense? Is it logical? I could give a fuck!!

  15. #40
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Yes, I know all that. I just don't know why it is so. For me, I just like the anatomy.
    For me, it's always about the bathrooms.

    They view us as a bunch of lame suckers to be pilfered and then discarded when the $$$ runs out--did you see Katrine's take on this? I'm requoting it below. Very interesting....

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Katrine
    But really, its quite simple. Club regulars, for the most part, are considered a mockery of a man (MANY exceptions here, don't get your panties all wadded up your hairy cracks guys!) I both pity and deride many club regulars, and don't want MY man to be considered a cuckhold that another dancer is pilfering. Does this make sense? Is it logical? I could give a fuck!!
    Kat isn't wrong. It should be said that most regulars rightfully earn such derision and pity through their own actions--not simply because they're customers.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  16. #41
    Moderator yoda57us's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by kikin
    That's all fine and dandy...except that the dancers have very little respect for us. They view us as a bunch of lame suckers to be pilfered and then discarded when the $$$ runs out--did you see Katrine's take on this? I'm requoting it below. Very interesting....
    Well, if that's the way you approach things-all dancers are this, all dancers are that- then that is the way you will get treated. I treat everyone with respect until I am given a reason not to. A g-string is not sufficient reason not to in my book. If you start worrying about what dancers say in the dressing room about customers you will never enjoy yourself in a strip club.

    Understand that it is a dancers job to get as much money from you as she can. It's just that simple. Your approach as a smart customer is to know that and, on a dancer by dancer basis, decide who you can have fun with and who you can't. I've had some of the sweetest, most darling ladies you could ever meet try to squeeze one or two more dances out of me after I had already done a VIP or two with them. So what? Just say no, or say yes if you want to. Yes she wants your money, and you want her ass in your lap. There's no reason why these two seperate needs can't both be met and both sides can't walk away happy.

    BTW, there's no need to re-post Kats POV on this stuff and your missing the point anyway. Even within the quote you pasted she states that there are exceptions to her opinion on regulars and, in truth, not wanting regulars is hardly a measure of a dancer's integrity. If I where to one day find myself in the presence of said hot eastern european lady and it happened to be in a strip club and she happened to be all dolled up in some scanty stripper attire I would allow her to empty my wallet with absolutely no hesitation....then go back to my hotel and write my first and last trip report.
    Quote Originally Posted by Katrine View Post
    yoda, I want you so bad it aches in the swimsuit area.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    Sophia_Starina is a sensible stripper...Naked all the way.....
    Quote Originally Posted by tempest666 View Post
    Double team! 2 latinas with big tits!!

  17. #42
    Newbie playstation's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Gemini25
    Yeah, I've never heard of a club that allows husbands and BFs to hang out.


    well,i have...as a matter of fact i'm at my wife's club every night for the last hour or two....
    as for that rule,it's because of problems they have with immature,insecure guy's that just can't handle it and cause problems.

  18. #43
    AlexxaHex
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    As long as you are monogamous, I can see your point in just wanting to go have a good time, have some drinks with friends and see some pretty girls dancing.

    If it were me, I don't think I would be cool with my bf getting full contact lap dances, but just hanging out and tipping the girls is ok with me.

    My bf visits me at the club on Friday nights (he picks me up from work and then we hang out all weekend) and I could care less if he tips another girl (or several) but I would prefer he would just get dances from me. He knows better than to hook up with anyone else. I rarely know of any instances where a stripper goes home with a customer. IT IS VERY RARE, no matter how good looking the guy is.

    Just let her know that you are going to be faithful to her and that she has nothing to worry about. If you dont' have trust in a relationship, there is no point in being in one.

    This sounds like a situation where compromise is essential. And have a talk with her about why she doesnt' trust you.

    Why won't you go visit her at her job? Does it bother you at all or is it at her suggestion. Most managers dont care if the occasional bf is there as long as it doesnt affect her making money and she doesnt spend all her time talking to you.

  19. #44
    Featured Member kikin's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by yoda57us
    Well, if that's the way you approach things-all dancers are this, all dancers are that- then that is the way you will get treated. I treat everyone with respect until I am given a reason not to. A g-string is not sufficient reason not to in my book. If you start worrying about what dancers say in the dressing room about customers you will never enjoy yourself in a strip club.
    Well said. And I agree.

  20. #45
    Newbie Gemini25's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    I can't visit her at work. The club has an absolute ban on BFs and husbands. A breach of the rule would result in termination. I understand why such rules are in place, but they seem a little Draconian. Club owners and managers should take the individual situation into account.

    I guess this is all academic for me anyway. If she doesn't want me to go, I'm not gonna' sneak around to do so. However, it's interesting to see various takes on this issue.

    This isn't about her worrying about me being a regular at some club. I only go to SCs casually, and I can't understand why she would mind the occasional visit --which I think many of the posts have agreed. Moreover, it's not about me spending "our" money at the club, b/c we don't pool financial resources yet.

  21. #46
    Senior Member GuyPOV's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Take it as a compliment. If you were broke and had no career, she would roll out the red carpet for your strip club entrance. However, you have a lot going on. Plus how do you think you got her in the first place. She knows she can be replaced. I'm not trying to dog her out, she is just trying to keep her man. I'm in a high end career myself and it is amazing how a girls attitude can change once I tell them what I do for a living.

  22. #47
    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    if this is the biggest of your problems consider yourself lucky.

  23. #48
    Member RS's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Quote Originally Posted by Gemini25
    Moreover, it's not about me spending "our" money at the club, b/c we don't pool financial resources yet.
    side note: don't pool your financial resources...

  24. #49
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Gemini, it seems you haven't been paying attention to the posts explaining why many of us don't like our men going to strip clubs, even casually. Maybe you need to go back and reread. If this is an example of they way you pay attention when people answer your questions, I'm betting there's more problems in your relationship than just this strip club-going thing. Seems you've chosen to only pay attention to the answers that went along with what you were already thinking in the first place. You'll never understand if you can't accept varying answers/viewpoints.

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  25. #50
    Veteran Member girlnew156's Avatar
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    Default Re: Boyfriends in "other" clubs

    Appears to me like you can only enjoy your GF at the club.
    Appears to me that you cannot accept her for what she is, a stripper.

    Wondering how much time you two spend outside the club, if you meet at all
    outside the club. Keep saying that without the club atomsphere, the situation
    seems repressed.

    Oh, well, my observations.
    Not a psychological analyst. Maybe it will work out by itself. Good luck.

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