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Thread: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

  1. #1
    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    How do stupid people live this long? LOL

    http://www.courttv.com/people/scm/121505_ctv.html

    Updated Dec. 19, 2005, 10:56 a.m. ET

    Police: Door thwarted robbery suspect's escape attempt

    A suspect wanted for a convenience-store holdup in Joplin, Mo., may just be this year's dumbest criminal.

    According to Joplin Police Detective Jason Schanot, a masked gunman held up a store at about 2:17 a.m. on Nov. 21 and effortlessly removed an undisclosed amount of money from the cash register — the store clerk was hiding in a back room. But the suspect's escape was more complicated.

    When the suspect tried to leave the store, he was unable to open the door. The store's front door swings inward and customers have to pull the door open to leave. Detective Schanot said the robber pushed at the door when he should have pulled.

    This oversight jumpstarted what became a protracted and comical escape attempt that was caught on the store's surveillance camera.

    The robber reportedly hurled himself against the door several times before attempting to kick it open. When that failed, he hurled a magazine rack at the door but was unable to break the glass. He then took the rack to the store's window, shattered the glass and escaped.

    Joplin police have not yet apprehended the suspect. He is described as a black man in his mid-20s and over 6 feet tall. At the time of the robbery, the suspect had a T-shirt wrapped around his head and wore a surgical mask. Anyone with information can call the Joplin police department at (417) 623-3131.

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    Aaaand another one:

    Footprints in snow lead to burglary suspect's arrest

    David J. Schild Jr. probably did not count on Mother Nature playing a role in his capture on burglary charges.

    Every step he took to the three businesses he allegedly targeted and the return trip to his home was imprinted in the fresh snow that fell on the early morning of Dec. 6.

    Lansdale Police Sgt. Dean Miller said officers were called to investigate two attempted burglaries and one successful break-in — all three within a two-block radius. An automotive store had been ransacked, and an undisclosed amount of cash and a digital camera were missing. At a pizza store, someone had tried to force open the front and back doors, and a window had been broken at a car dealership.

    Investigators observed that all three crime scenes shared the same set of shoe imprints. The officers then followed the footprints from the third location, the automotive store, to Schild's home.

    Sgt. Miller said Schild's landlord let officers into the house, where Schild initially could not explain the fresh injuries to his hand. When the landlord gave permission for the house to be searched, Schild admitted to the crimes and directed officers to a pair of sneakers with patterns on the soles that matched the footprints at the crime scenes. They also recovered a bag that contained tools that the suspect may have used in the first two burglary attempts.

    Schild was charged with burglary, attempted burglary, criminal trespass and mischief, receiving stolen property, and possession of an instrument of crime. He was taken to the Montgomery County Jail and held on $50,000 bond.

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    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    I have heard this story before and they even did a spotlight on it,on one of the "cop type" shows.It was funny as Hell seeing the guy trying to push the door and then moments later,someone pushes the door from the outside and comes right in.
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

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    Veteran Member lwtex52's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    Well, it makes ME worry about the future of the species. While we're talking about criminals, check this:

    WICHITA, Kan. - What started with a car theft turned into an escape and resulting chase that ended with the male fugitive being caught hiding out in a woman's restroom by an officer who received a ride from a pizza deliveryman.

    Now, that has GOT to be some kind of great story.
    My latest conspiracy theory: I am convinced that Dick Cheney is, in reality, Elmer Fudd.

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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    Did the guy steal the cop car???

    WTF?

    Oy vey.

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    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    I guess some folks steal cop cars to get a rush,but then getting *ss raped in the pen is a rush too.
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

    中国大CHINESE BIG BOOBS!!!中国大




  7. #7
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    Somewhere in Orange County, the exact same cop car has been stolen three times in two weeks. It always turns up in the same town, I think at a different apartment complex each time. I heard it on the radio the other day. This has to be some sort of game, I think!

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    Veteran Member lwtex52's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    As has often been said at this site: You've never been really drunk until you awaken naked in a patrol car with two cops, and YOU are the one driving.
    My latest conspiracy theory: I am convinced that Dick Cheney is, in reality, Elmer Fudd.

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    Veteran Member lwtex52's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    Tuesday, December 20, 2005

    WICHITA, Kan. - What started with a car theft turned into an escape and resulting chase that ended with the male fugitive being caught hiding out in a woman's restroom by an officer who received a ride from a pizza deliveryman.

    Wichita police say an officer who stopped a car Sunday afternoon discovered that it was a vehicle stolen from a sales lot two days earlier. The driver, a 30-year-old man, said he had some injuries that needed treatment. Police, who didn't know the nature of the injuries the man claimed to have, had him taken to a hospital emergency room.

    Police said that after being treated the man asked to use the restroom and an officer escorted him there and waited outside. A short time later, he was spotted in the air lock at the exit of the emergency room, and he ran out of the hospital with the officer in pursuit, police said.

    The restroom had only one door, and police said the man must have stood on a railing in the stall, climbed into the ceiling and made his way to the exit.

    Police said the man conned a motorist at a convenience store into giving him a ride. A pizza delivery driver who saw the pursuing officer gave him a ride and they followed the car to a fast food restaurant.

    When the officer went in, he spotted the man peeking out the door of the women's restroom and took him back into custody.

    ---

    Information from: The Wichita Eagle, http://www.kansas.com
    My latest conspiracy theory: I am convinced that Dick Cheney is, in reality, Elmer Fudd.

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    God/dess onlythebest's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    Here's a link to what else,stupid criminals.

    http://www.freenet.msp.mn.us/people/norstrem/stupid.htm
    One of woman's cardinal rule: Body parts can be fake,everything else has to be real.

    一个女人的枢机规则:肢体可以伪造,一切必须真实.

    中国大CHINESE BIG BOOBS!!!中国大




  11. #11
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah
    Somewhere in Orange County, the exact same cop car has been stolen three times in two weeks. It always turns up in the same town, I think at a different apartment complex each time. I heard it on the radio the other day. This has to be some sort of game, I think!
    "Dey fuckin wit yu! Dey fuckin wit yu!" LOL!!!

    I mean, can't you see a bunch of guys rolling around on the floor and couch laughing cuz they stole the same car from the cops three times in a row?

  12. #12
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'm guessing he wasn't MENSA...

    Quote Originally Posted by VenusGoddess
    Aaaand another one:

    Footprints in snow lead to burglary suspect's arrest
    Reminds me of the dufus in Michigan who robbed a bank on a snowmobile. They followed the track right to his house. DUH.

    "They'll never catch me in the woods!"

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