> The Perfect Forwarding Email

> My heartfelt appreciation goes out to all of you who
> have taken the time and
> trouble to send me "forwards" over the past 12
> months. Thank you for making
> me feel safe, secure, blessed and Healthy.
> Extra thanks to whoever sent me the email about rat
> crap in the glue on
> envelopes - cause I now have to go get a wet towel
> every time I need to seal
> an envelope.
> Also, I scrub The top of every can I open for the
> same reason. Because of
> your genuine concern, I no longer drink Coca Cola
> because it I know it can
> remove toilet stains, which is not exactly an
> appealing characteristic.
> I no longer check the coin return on pay phones
> because I could be pricked
> with a needle infected with AIDS.
> I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even
> though I smell like a water
> buffalo on a hot day.
> I no longer go to shopping malls because someone
> might drug me with a
> perfume sample and rob me.
> I no longer eat KFC because their "chickens" are
> actually horrible mutant
> freaks with no eyes or feathers.
> I no longer worry about my soul because at last
> count, I have 363,214 angels
> looking out for me.
> Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers
> my prayers if I forward
> an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish
> within five minutes.
> I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a
> sick girl on the
> internet who is about to die in the hospital (for
> the 1,387,258th time).
> I no longer have any money at all in fact - but that
> will change once I
> receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are
> sending me for participating
> in their special on-line email program.
> Yes, I want to thank you all so much for looking out
> for me that I will now
> return the favour! If you don't send this e-mail to
> at least 144,000 people
> in the next 7 minutes, a large pigeon with a wicked
> case of diarrhea will
> land on your head at 5:00 PM (EST) this afternoon. I
> know this will occur
> because it actually happened to a friend of my next
> door neighbor's
> ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's
> beautician.
> DO IT NOW OR ELSE.
> And Have a nice day!
>
> Catcha Later


:rofl: