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  1. #51
    Veteran Member girlnew156's Avatar
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by Sh0t
    There is a difference between dating a stripper and dating a woman who happens to be a stripper.
    Oh, Ok, this means you meet a stripper inside the club
    and you wanna date her.

    Next, you meet a woman, and have a date, and then find
    out later she is a stripper.

    Next, one then jumps up and down, and say,

    "Hot damn! I dated a stripper, I did, I did, I can't believe it,
    I did!!"

    Well, good golly, mother pin a rose on you.

    Something to talk about on Monday mornings at work.

  2. #52
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by ricky009
    what's with the negativity around here ...

    I know a lot of folks around here are jaded.. and the reading the saga of "Oh, i want to date a stripper" again is about as appealing as a car ride on Highway 5 with Regis and Kelly after they ate a stack of bean burritos, but he's 18, he's enthusiastic...

    Please don't crush his what seems to be an earnest question and desire. Encourage him, it may have low odds of working out, but hey dude.. life is about playing the tough ones... so here's my advice.


    BE A MAN, and be confident, smile look her in teh eye and talk to her.. see where it goes..

    and if she breaks your heart.. learn from it and move on.. Trust me its happened to all of us. I have dated a few dancers, and many non dancers.. and honestly, outside of the fact that they worked at a SC.. they were JUST good decent women. one of them was a great cook, another went on to become a model.. so who knows what and where life will take you or them.
    yeah, except the odds are good that she doens't even remember who he is. We're trying to help.....while she may be the world to him, he is rent money to her.

    Here's a test....go in again. If she doesn't come up to you, she doesn't want you. This only works if you didn't spend money the last time you were in, which I'm assuming is the case.

  3. #53
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by some newb
    Oh, Ok, this means you meet a stripper inside the club
    and you wanna date her.

    Next, you meet a woman, and have a date, and then find
    out later she is a stripper.

    Next, one then jumps up and down, and say,

    "Hot damn! I dated a stripper, I did, I did, I can't believe it,
    I did!!"

    Well, good golly, mother pin a rose on you.

    Something to talk about on Monday mornings at work.
    Hmm nope, not what it means at all
    You can't love something you think is flawless - me


  4. #54
    Veteran Member Eques's Avatar
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by Emily
    yeah, except the odds are good that she doens't even remember who he is. We're trying to help.....while she may be the world to him, he is rent money to her.

    Here's a test....go in again. If she doesn't come up to you, she doesn't want you. This only works if you didn't spend money the last time you were in, which I'm assuming is the case.
    So... what does it mean if you come in several months later and a stripper you don't remember, remembers everything about your previous encounter, your name and every detail of your life that you revealed to her?
    Never stand begging for that which you have the power to earn.

    The truth lies in a man's dreams... perhaps in this unhappy world of ours whose madness is better than a foolish sanity.

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  5. #55
    Chicagoeditor
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    ^^^Means she has an excellent memory.

    But seriously, it's an interesting question. A dancer I hope to see again tonight did this to me last week, when she remembered our one other meeting (four months ago) in vivid detail, including not only many details of our long conversation (it was a slow night) but even my profession and name! Seems to me that however she does this (real interest or a custy database back in the locker room), it deserves high praise and at least two songs in the VIP.

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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by Eques
    So... what does it mean if you come in several months later and a stripper you don't remember, remembers everything about your previous encounter, your name and every detail of your life that you revealed to her?

    it means she likes you or your money AND she has a good memory....but this is more of a test for the OP

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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Falling in love with a stripper can hurt, but it may hurt as well with any other girl.

    Well, rationally dating a stripper is a strange idea. However, every guy in a strip club at least once thought about it. I guess this is the point which makes them come (and spend money) again and again, even if they beleive it to be strange. What any other reason can be to visit SC at all? Even, if some of them considering it as entertainment only, who knows what's deep inside their minds?

    The only problem is that dating a stripper conflicts with the primary interests of dancers, since this is really their job and customers is the source of income for them. The rules are against you and going straight can lead to problems.

    You have to change your attitude to the situation first. There is a simple exercise for that (it is not specific to strippers, works in all situations when "rules are against you").

    First, you need to demistify charisma. You should recognize and understand clearly that it's all about fantasy and strippers are mere decent girls. They only wear high heeled shoes, grommed well, naked and groupped together in twilight.
    Second, you should destroy the myth of legitimacy. In that case, the myth is that you ought to give dancers money and so on. You should recognize and understand clearly that the claim to your money (and other claims) is groundless and funny. That the fact of absence of charisma itself leaves no ground for the claim.
    Third, you should consider what actions can be really taken against you. In that case, the worst case is a dancer moves on (I assume you behave as a gentleman ).
    After the steps, you can calmly consider your interests in such situations. I am not sure you will still want to date a stripper at the moment, since there is a lot of girls there besides them . Anyway, doing the exercise you will get a unique experience. Now, the situation is turned upside-down and it is you who rules. The girls will feel that by their backbones and put you at the first position in their lines, since this is the only way for them to regain control.

  8. #58
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by ericsson
    Falling in love with a stripper can hurt, but it may hurt as well with any other girl.
    I hear its hard on the knees as well.

    Quote Originally Posted by ericsson
    Well, rationally dating a stripper is a strange idea. However, every guy in a strip club at least once thought about it. I guess this is the point which makes them come (and spend money) again and again, even if they beleive it to be strange. What any other reason can be to visit SC at all? Even, if some of them considering it as entertainment only, who knows what's deep inside their minds?
    What happened to dating a girl primarily out of similar interests. Or compatibility? When did her occupation matter at the DATING level.

    I mean, fuck me sideways but, isn't the whole IDEA of dating to find out if a serious relationship could ensue? Does ANYTHING matter at the point of dating? Well I know, that to me, she has to have a mutual interest in me, and all of her teeth. What can I say? My standards are low.


    Quote Originally Posted by ericsson
    The only problem is that dating a stripper conflicts with the primary interests of dancers, since this is really their job and customers is the source of income for them. The rules are against you and going straight can lead to problems.
    Spoken like a person going to a club looking for a date. Yes. if you're objective is *headshake* date a stripper <again making occupation your primary choice in women> then yes, understand said point.

    Once I find out if she's a dancer, if I didn't know, I *gasp* ask her how she likes her job and move on. If you're worried about whether or not her occupation is getting in the way of an otherwise blossoming relationship, you'll find out more by NOT asking if it will, and just learn her personality. I know/knew a dancer who, well honestly, talked about her work tons, I knew the kind of dancer she was because of how she danced, talked, demanded respect, and most importantly I knew what kind of dancer she was because I knew a lot about her that had nothing to do with dancing. I was interested in the PERSON not the dancer, and the PERSON told me what kind of dancer she was.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ericsson
    You have to change your attitude to the situation first. There is a simple exercise for that (it is not specific to strippers, works in all situations when "rules are against you").
    Oooooo *breaks out notebook*


    Quote Originally Posted by Ericsson
    First, you need to demistify charisma. You should recognize and understand clearly that it's all about fantasy and strippers are mere decent girls. They only wear high heeled shoes, grommed well, naked and groupped together in twilight.
    Second, you should destroy the myth of legitimacy. In that case, the myth is that you ought to give dancers money and so on. You should recognize and understand clearly that the claim to your money (and other claims) is groundless and funny. That the fact of absence of charisma itself leaves no ground for the claim.
    Third, you should consider what actions can be really taken against you. In that case, the worst case is a dancer moves on (I assume you behave as a gentleman ).
    After the steps, you can calmly consider your interests in such situations. I am not sure you will still want to date a stripper at the moment, since there is a lot of girls there besides them . Anyway, doing the exercise you will get a unique experience. Now, the situation is turned upside-down and it is you who rules. The girls will feel that by their backbones and put you at the first position in their lines, since this is the only way for them to regain control.
    I want to say welcome to the board. And that I am not treating you like you are stupid. This is good insight, but its still stripper focused.

    Ok, I'm going to say it.

    If her being a stripper is affecting your choice in dating her, then...well...its going to end in flames. JESUS EFFING CHRIST. To post a thread like this makes it inherent you look at her stripping as an issue. ITS NOT WRONG TO THINK LIKE THAT, BUT STOP TRYING TO FUCKING DATE HER. Sure, occupation can conflict with a relationship. But when its keeping a relationship from starting right then there is a problem.

    And ericsson, I find your suggestions on how to date a stripper, "which also applies to any girl", very pedantic and objectifying. I am sure thats not what you meant, but when you say shit like:
    Quote Originally Posted by ericsson
    Now, the situation is turned upside-down and it is you who rules. The girls will feel that by their backbones and put you at the first position in their lines, since this is the only way for them to regain control.
    You are objectifying strippers/women as a whole. It may even be a true point, hell, I don't know, but at the very least its an assumption.

    Mast.

    P.S.
    and fuck if this bites me in the ass.

    I know a dancer who is a god damned queen in her occupation. She actually suffers at times because she demands a higher class out of her customers. Everything I've seen her wear to a club she could easily wear to your mom's 4th wedding. She's one of the most intelligent people I have ever met, she compromises for nothing that I have seen, and she is well put together and knows where she is going to be in the next 5 - 10 - 15 years. Your "exercises" make you a normie to these types of dancers. Listen to TOO, these kind of girls choose YOU. All the Money, and Charisma, and Intelligence in the world keeps you at the doorstep. She's got better things to do. And thats why I have so much respect for her/girls like this. Its never about sex, its never about love, its ALWAYS about whether or not you deserve their time (which may include but is not exclusive to sex/love...etc). And its an honor to be given their time because you know you're in a very small group to have it.

    You want some real advice?

    Go to the club to have a good time, and be you. Think about nothing. Dwell on nothing. Thinking leads to dwelling, dwelling leads to obsessing, obsessing leads to anger, and anger is the path to the dark side.


    Mast^2
    Last edited by Mastridonicus; 12-30-2005 at 08:30 AM. Reason: i suck @ grammar
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  9. #59
    Sitri
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Advice, go for a fashion model instead of a stripper. They are really good looking, and less shark like. Plus they travel a lot so you get a break from them. They are in season now in Miami Beach but you better hurry. But, you better be at least 6 ft tall.

    Walk around with an expensive camera and look artistic.

  10. #60
    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus
    I hear its hard on the knees as well.



    What happened to dating a girl primarily out of similar interests. Or compatibility? When did her occupation matter at the DATING level.

    I mean, fuck me sideways but, isn't the whole IDEA of dating to find out if a serious relationship could ensue? Does ANYTHING matter at the point of dating? Well I know, that to me, she has to have a mutual interest in me, and all of her teeth. What can I say? My standards are low.




    Spoken like a person going to a club looking for a date. Yes. if you're objective is *headshake* date a stripper <again making occupation your primary choice in women> then yes, understand said point.

    Once I find out if she's a dancer, if I didn't know, I *gasp* ask her how she likes her job and move on. If you're worried about whether or not her occupation is getting in the way of an otherwise blossoming relationship, you'll find out more by NOT asking if it will, and just learn her personality. I know/knew a dancer who, well honestly, talked about her work tons, I knew the kind of dancer she was because of how she danced, talked, demanded respect, and most importantly I knew what kind of dancer she was because I knew a lot about her that had nothing to do with dancing. I was interested in the PERSON not the dancer, and the PERSON told me what kind of dancer she was.



    Oooooo *breaks out notebook*




    I want to say welcome to the board. And that I am not treating you like you are stupid. This is good insight, but its still stripper focused.

    Ok, I'm going to say it.

    If her being a stripper is affecting your choice in dating her, then...well...its going to end in flames. JESUS EFFING CHRIST. To post a thread like this makes it inherent you look at her stripping as an issue. ITS NOT WRONG TO THINK LIKE THAT, BUT STOP TRYING TO FUCKING DATE HER. Sure, occupation can conflict with a relationship. But when its keeping a relationship from starting right then there is a problem.

    And ericsson, I find your suggestions on how to date a stripper, "which also applies to any girl", very pedantic and objectifying. I am sure thats not what you meant, but when you say shit like:


    You are objectifying strippers/women as a whole. It may even be a true point, hell, I don't know, but at the very least its an assumption.

    Mast.

    P.S.
    and fuck if this bites me in the ass.

    I know a dancer who is a god damned queen in her occupation. She actually suffers at times because she demands a higher class out of her customers. Everything I've seen her wear to a club she could easily wear to your mom's 4th wedding. She's one of the most intelligent people I have ever met, she compromises for nothing that I have seen, and she is well put together and knows where she is going to be in the next 5 - 10 - 15 years. Your "exercises" make you a normie to these types of dancers. Listen to TOO, these kind of girls choose YOU. All the Money, and Charisma, and Intelligence in the world keeps you at the doorstep. She's got better things to do. And thats why I have so much respect for her/girls like this. Its never about sex, its never about love, its ALWAYS about whether or not you deserve their time (which may include but is not exclusive to sex/love...etc). And its an honor to be given their time because you know you're in a very small group to have it.

    You want some real advice?

    Go to the club to have a good time, and be you. Think about nothing. Dwell on nothing. Thinking leads to dwelling, dwelling leads to obsessing, obsessing leads to anger, and anger is the path to the dark side.


    Mast^2
    Wha dude mellow out!

    I gotta disagree with the whole "one's occupation shouldn't matter" premise. That is present for everyone - male and female - especially in the US (if your not a US person.) Many in the US see their occupation as their self-identity - but that is another thread. So "her being a dancer" and "him being a muscian" is gonna matter.


    And the whole "if you deserve her time" stuff is kinda making you sound like a stripper groupie. You go on about how to treat them as people and then you get all worshipful of the species near the end. I was wondering if I should say "Amen" or not. Some of them are definitely NOT worth your time and some would say "Is she worth MY money?"

    Otherwise - good post.

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    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by Deogol
    Wha dude mellow out!

    I gotta disagree with the whole "one's occupation shouldn't matter" premise. That is present for everyone - male and female - especially in the US (if your not a US person.) Many in the US see their occupation as their self-identity - but that is another thread. So "her being a dancer" and "him being a muscian" is gonna matter.


    And the whole "if you deserve her time" stuff is kinda making you sound like a stripper groupie. You go on about how to treat them as people and then you get all worshipful of the species near the end. I was wondering if I should say "Amen" or not. Some of them are definitely NOT worth your time and some would say "Is she worth MY money?"

    Otherwise - good post.
    LOL they call me mellow yellowwww...

    You're right bro, I did come off that way. Kinda to illustrate a point.

    You meet a girl in the club, no external connection, well you know what? she HAS to choose you, and if you're looking to be chosen her occupation should not matter. I mean yea if you met her otc and she says 'Hey I'm a dancer' and thats a problem, get the fuck outta there, but if you're in the club and smitten, then if it matters, you need to wake up. I mean how many girls here met a guy in the club they dated that couldn't handle it?

    Now, when you're meeting a girl at the beginning of a potential relationship FUCK YEA occupation matters, but if it makes or breaks the relationship, MAYBE you shouldn't be IN the relationship already when you're finding out it is a big deal.

    'Well I didn't find out she was a an archangel until AFTER we slept together'

    I understand what you're saying tho, but remember the context of which I posted that. Where this guy met her and is trying to date her dictates what I said... Now if I started a thread with that post, than yea, you could say there would be trouble in paradise. But I aint the one askin the questions.

    I'm no anti-sex individual trust me, but all these threads are basically 'Tell me the fast track to parking my meat bus in tuna town'

    Amen

    Mast
    Last edited by Mastridonicus; 12-30-2005 at 03:07 PM. Reason: The elusive Grammar Mouth Bass
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus
    LOL they call me mellow yellowwww...
    I call him Cherry Coke, personally.
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Went to the club last night and found out she has a boyfriend (not suprised). Guess it's time to move on. But thanks anyway to those who were helpful.

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    Veteran Member laplover69's Avatar
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    One thing I have learned about dancers is that their so-called "boyfriends" usually don't last for any great length of time, often times a couple of months or less... I still wouldn't get your hopes up though, she probably has lots of others warming up in the bullpen besides you and most of them will have there arms worn out before there time cums. Ha!

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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus
    And ericsson, I find your suggestions on how to date a stripper, "which also applies to any girl", very pedantic and objectifying. I am sure thats not what you meant, but when you say shit like:
    ...

    You are objectifying strippers/women as a whole. It may even be a true point, hell, I don't know, but at the very least its an assumption.
    Which applies not "to any girl", but to any situation one need to withstand power. This is an important point - it is about power, not sex/love. The idea "to date a stipper" is an instinctive response to her power. But not reasonable.
    I gave a way how to rationalize it, since this is what I am using (originally, it was about how to withstand an interrogation). It is obectifying because one has to look at the situation in cold blood to clean it out. You can subjectify them back later if you want .
    Go to the club to have a good time, and be you. Think about nothing. Dwell on nothing. Thinking leads to dwelling, dwelling leads to obsessing, obsessing leads to anger, and anger is the path to the dark side.
    Well, the exercise I gave is definilely the way to the dark side: the light side guys do not date strippers . But I do not consider the dark side as something bad, this just means to me new non-typical abilities, although sometimes risky ones. And the light side guys just preserve a tradition conservatively.

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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    One thing I have learned about dancers is that their so-called "boyfriends" usually don't last for any great length of time, often times a couple of months or less...
    But is that saying more about the dancers' personalities or the men and their inability to handle their woman stripping? One only needs read a handful of threads on this board about the difficulties dancers have finding accepting and approving partners. SFF, SS, ROBing and other ITC behaviors aside, there's a reason dancers can be some of the loneliest people on the planet, and it has more to do with men than dancers, all other conditions being equal.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Casual Observer
    But is that saying more about the dancers' personalities or the men and their inability to handle their woman stripping? One only needs read a handful of threads on this board about the difficulties dancers have finding accepting and approving partners. SFF, SS, ROBing and other ITC behaviors aside, there's a reason dancers can be some of the loneliest people on the planet, and it has more to do with men than dancers, all other conditions being equal.
    Shrug, I honestly just don't get it.

    I'm not approaching it from a massivly sexual aspect or anything, but I just don't understand it, how she could be/become a dancer and it cause problems mid relationship, unless she kept it a secret up till that point. But that for me would be a cost of trust. Outside the obvious, some relationships arent meant to be. I mean it IS a truth bringer.

    If I dated a girl who waited to tell me she was a dancer, how long she waited to tell me could destroy our relationship. Not because she's a dancer but because she made it X long and still couldn't trust me with that info and decided to keep it a secret.

    Mast.

    *Chuckle* "If I dated a girl" who am I kidding huh?
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by ericsson
    Which applies not "to any girl", but to any situation one need to withstand power. This is an important point - it is about power, not sex/love. The idea "to date a stipper" is an instinctive response to her power. But not reasonable.
    I gave a way how to rationalize it, since this is what I am using (originally, it was about how to withstand an interrogation). It is obectifying because one has to look at the situation in cold blood to clean it out. You can subjectify them back later if you want .

    Well, the exercise I gave is definilely the way to the dark side: the light side guys do not date strippers . But I do not consider the dark side as something bad, this just means to me new non-typical abilities, although sometimes risky ones. And the light side guys just preserve a tradition conservatively.

    Hahahah bro, we'll just have to agree to disagree.

    I just like to enjoy my time. We don't have much. Why fight to make a girl like me? Why worry about power and control? I will never change who I am just to be with a girl. I'd rather just be me and naturally work through this process. I guess I'll just have to settle to leave the best to you. I am obviously not cold/controlling enough to command the situation properly

    I don't date strippers though, I date women who may or may not happen to be strippers :/ So my information maybe somewhat useless. Per the norm.

    Mast

    I also would like to point out my severe belief in these threads just being a coy play at 'How can I park my meat bus in tuna town with this stripper that didn't finish me off 300.00 in?'

    :/
    People are not ruled by their memories.

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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette
    For every stripper on this earth there's 4379 men trying to date her all at once. Best you can do is get in line and hope you don't have to wait too long before she notices you exist.
    4379 men while duration of her body


    Huh?? Do you want to make this a bit more comprehensible before it leaves the bandwidth? - friendly but puzzled moderator
    Last edited by Jay Zeno; 01-17-2006 at 06:19 PM.

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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    I have been dating a dancer for quite awhile now. When we first met in her club she was just another dancer. I got dances from her once in awhile for about a year. During that time we did spend time talking. We both actually enjoyed the time together. She finally told me her real name and a few other things. We went out and have been dating ever since. We took a chance with each other just like any other couple.

    Much of the advice above is very appropriate. Jobs do affect relationships. Some people travel a lot. Some have difficult schedules. One of the most important things is that you must accept what she does for a living. I have seen several guys date dancers thinking that they will stop dancing. I have seen several breakups of my girlfriend’s friends because they would not stop dancing for their boyfriends. To be able to accept dating a dancer one has to accept that when she spends money on you it came from other guys who paid to grope her.

    Dancers do have certain issues that come with the job. There will always be drama in the club. Dancing is not an easy job. It comes with a lot of stress. Just read several of the other threads and you can see what dancers go through. I have been through a lot with my girlfriend. It may have even given us a stronger relationship in that we have dealt with the issues together.

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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    ^^congrats...you seem like you get it.

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    Senior Member contheboyalready's Avatar
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    I'm always happy to go out with a polite, sweet older guy that comes into the club a lot, and after spending some time getting to know him.

    I feel terrible when I have to break the dates with them. My schedule is just hell with school and such.

    How about next week, sweetie?

    ***

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    Senior Member contheboyalready's Avatar
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by Sh0t
    There is a difference between dating a stripper and dating a woman who happens to be a stripper.
    The difference being that the second is pathetically ingratiating and a transparent attempt to be "sensitive". You've obviously heard the "it's what I do, not who I am" complaint quite a bit. Congratulations on the creative pick up line. I'm all a flutter.

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    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by contheboyalready
    I'm always happy to go out with a polite, sweet older guy that comes into the club a lot, and after spending some time getting to know him.

    I feel terrible when I have to break the dates with them. My schedule is just hell with school and such.

    How about next week, sweetie?

    ***
    Yeah, customers really find such transparent dishonesty to be so endearing ...

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    Senior Member contheboyalready's Avatar
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    Default Re: Want to date stripper

    Quote Originally Posted by dlabtot
    Yeah, customers really find such transparent dishonesty to be so endearing ...
    I can see I should have reversed the order of my two posts so that you would have seen that I was being facetious in the first one. The job is was it is, and it's a shame it has become so much more about games between customer and stripper than even just a few years ago. This is the only forum Ive run across to discuss that dynamic in any depth. It's a tricky occupation to deal with mentally and emotionally, as many are I imagine, like being a cop. And dating a cop is, trust me, no picnic. Something to consider if you want to date a stripper.

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