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Thread: Give it 2 Me Raw

  1. #1
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    Default Give it 2 Me Raw

    1st off, I am not having second thoughts or suffering from cold feet. It's gonna happen but this love can drive me so batty! The fact that I am here doing what i would NEVER do, confide in strangers just represents my dedication to this union. I am getting married in May to a beautiful woman I have been with for 6 1/2 years in the Caribbean. We have always had issues, but totally inseparable from each other. I am a Gemini (male) and she is a cancer. I am very expressive, creative, and confident and what I would consider a free spirit. I am 33 and 6 years older than she though I look youthful always generating shocked faces after being carded and no one ever guesses more than 26 for my age (I make a game of it). I am attractive, educated and successful coming up from a struggling background.



    I am black and she is mex/rican. Let’s just say she is almost the opposite of me in almost every way. She grew up in the burbs, me in the city. She is extremely loyal and family oriented. Her mom is her best friend. She is shy, stubborn and just plain difficult for no reason it seems at times. Although I'm much more sexual than she is, sex has not really been a problem. Even though she is shy I have been able to execute many of my sexual fantasies with her. She is consistent and euphoric sexually, though we have worked to get it that way.



    I hurt her about 2 years into our relationship when I got busted in an affair.

    It saw strictly sexual but it was with an ex that I was with for a long time b4 her. I know I messed up bad and should be castrated (ouch)! Through it all we never parted and though we considered splitting, it just could not happen. I don’t want her to leave me and she wants me. We have been living 2gether 4 almost 5 years.



    The level of passion she exudes towards may be my issue (hence why I strayed). Her way is just different and rather reserved staying in line with her disposition. I was not used to it. There is something that is still confusing to me as I'm sure u can tell from my banter. She is very quiet and it has taken me all of our relationship to get the lil bit I know out of her. Her crabby way will send her into her shell and I understand that but it still translates to me that she does not care enough to "fight" for us. It’s almost surreal, she will just run from a problem expecting it to magically disappear whereas I feel the dedication to attack it face 1st and grow stronger from the experience. We can’t share that 2gether.



    Our families get along well and we don’t want or need for anything. I provide well for us and we don’t even have children so she works too as her choice. Her self esteem has always been low due to weight and acne problems. The truth is, she has a bomb figure and her weight goes in all the right places 36-27-44 (5' 1", 145 lbs) and even thought she was always utterly gorgeous, through the years her acne has subsided substantially to where it should not be an issue any more. She is very exotic looking with long black silky hair and perfectly symmetric features. I tell her often that she is perfect to me just the way she is. I know she won’t believe that. I want her to see what I feel and live confidently and care less about what anyone thinks or anything in the past and just let it go for our sake. Since I am in entertainment and business, the insecurity really contradicts what I am all about.



    I have tried everything to try to make her happy. I have been loyal since the episode. Spontaneous everything, flowers, diamonds, gifts, vacations, u name it. She can’t be bought. I wear my heart on my sleeve; I initiate communication and express myself with ease to her. She very may well be happy and love me more than I ever will know, I just want to feel it and her to show it willingly, or at least hear it. I guess I want the fairytale because the way I see it, there is no reason why we in particular can't have it.



    I am writing to this board cause u guys are the sharpest bunch I have seen out there. I have ceased to communicate (a little) with her as much and just holding things in more and more. She is so sensitive that I have to construct everything I say to her. This is not who I am. I believe that communication is key and is the only thing which separates us from strangers and enemies. I never wanted the typical marriage where she does her thing and I do mine, I can just stay single for that. She doesn’t really seem to care as long as she gets her sleep. Now she is so consumed in planning the wedding in ST. Lucia that I am almost an afterthought. What do I do?

  2. #2
    God/dess Mastridonicus's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Ok. This site needs a drama section. BAD.

    I skimmed this and saw 'affair'

    Answer: Move on.

    I seriously need to look at something else in my spare time.

    Look, I read like 8 words, and I think I got the gist.

    YOU CAN'T MAKE SOMEONE LOVE YOU THE WAY YOU NEED TO BE LOVED. I.E. AFFAIR.

    Ask yourself some questions.

    1. Do you love her?
    2. What do you want more, her? Or Her to be happy?
    3. Are you prepaired to find out someone can make her happier than you?
    4. If things stay as they are, will you be happy? Continue to be loyal?

    You don't need our help with this, you need to read your own post and tell yourself what to do.

    If you truly want her to be happy, you know that you are only secondary to that.
    Last edited by Mastridonicus; 01-03-2006 at 07:03 PM. Reason: concious got the best of me
    People are not ruled by their memories.

  3. #3
    God/dess Rhiannon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    ^Hopefully that section will be in the works soon, Mast.

    I don't know what to make of the original post. Honestly, I think I managed to get through about 1/3 of it. I'm sorry, my attention span is just not so good today.

    Whatever's going on though.. I hope it works out for you.

  4. #4
    Featured Member Paintbaby's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Gemini man, Cancer woman. That's all I needed to read. Doomed from the start. Google it if you don't believe me.

  5. #5
    Banned Blade's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    What the fuck...are we the dear fuckin abbey of the net now?
    Dear Stripperweb,
    My life is going to shit cuz I fell in love with a hottie and then stuck my dick in some ho, now my girl won't talk to me anymore what should I do?
    Signed,
    Pathetic Loser
    Dear Pathetic Loser,
    Grow up! Don't go looking for answers on a website designed for exotic dancers and the adult entertainment industry employees, we don't give a rats ass




    edit...maybe we should start an advice colum, I volunteer to give advice to the lovelorn!

  6. #6
    Featured Member hannah83's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    yeah...i didn't get through all of it either. Way too long for me to read right now.

    But i too saw the word affair, and hey. if you cheated on her...you obviously don't love her like you thought you did. Yeah i know that ppl make mistakes, but it seems to me like you know that you fucked up and now you're trying to buy her love.

    it doesn't work that way.

    and one more thing...you don't need to come here(i really don't understand why you choose Stripperweb in the first place...but whatever). Like Mast said...you already know what to do. You need to sit down and talk to her about this. Don't pretend that everything is fine b/c then once you are married, you will prolly start to hate her and you will most likely end up getting a divorce.

    okay. there's my advice for the day. lol back to watchin the pistons
    There's a wild side behind every innocent face.

    End violence against women.
    I support Dottie.


  7. #7
    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    What the fuck...are we the dear fuckin abbey of the net now?
    Dear Stripperweb,
    My life is going to shit cuz I fell in love with a hottie and then stuck my dick in some ho, now my girl won't talk to me anymore what should I do?
    Signed,
    Pathetic Loser
    Dear Pathetic Loser,
    Grow up! Don't go looking for answers on a website designed for exotic dancers and the adult entertainment industry employees, we don't give a rats ass
    Blade, never let it be said that you don't grasp the concept of The Economy of Words.

    <S> Blade
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

    William F. Buckley, Jr.

  8. #8
    Veteran Member lwtex52's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Drama section? I'll create one.
    My latest conspiracy theory: I am convinced that Dick Cheney is, in reality, Elmer Fudd.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus
    Ok. This site needs a drama section. BAD.
    LOL, there WAS a Drama section, back three of four years ago.

    ~~McCain

  10. #10
    God/dess Rhiannon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Quote Originally Posted by lwtex52
    Drama section? I'll create one.
    Create it in the Member's Section, Mmkay?

  11. #11
    Veteran Member lwtex52's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Already done, but in the wrong section. Check it out.
    My latest conspiracy theory: I am convinced that Dick Cheney is, in reality, Elmer Fudd.

  12. #12
    God/dess Rhiannon's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Moved it

    The Lounge has enough Drama clogging up the works as it is. I brought the idea up because it seems that Drama is taking up nearly every section of the site. While some of it is unavoidable and people need to get it out... It really needs its own section.

  13. #13
    Veteran Member lwtex52's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    I'm not very good at creating drama. I even took my ex wife out for dinner last week. What's worse, she and my fiance are getting to be good friends. Should I be worried?
    My latest conspiracy theory: I am convinced that Dick Cheney is, in reality, Elmer Fudd.

  14. #14
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    LOL, yes! You could be one of the first men to unwittingly and unwillingly be subjected to a surprise threesome! The horror, the humanity!

    ~~McCain

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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Quote Originally Posted by Blade
    What the fuck...are we the dear fuckin abbey of the net now?
    Dear Stripperweb,
    My life is going to shit cuz I fell in love with a hottie and then stuck my dick in some ho, now my girl won't talk to me anymore what should I do?
    Signed,
    Pathetic Loser
    Dear Pathetic Loser,
    Grow up! Don't go looking for answers on a website designed for exotic dancers and the adult entertainment industry employees, we don't give a rats ass




    edit...maybe we should start an advice colum, I volunteer to give advice to the lovelorn!


    Thanks, very insightful!

  16. #16
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Blade is proof that an Irishman CANNOT be outsmarted.

    And OP, stop wasting that nice "mex/rican" girl's time. If you love her, let her find someone else. Mocoso.

  17. #17
    God/dess doc-catfish's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    I tried to read this, but in attempting to jump from the first paragraph to the second I didn't make it across the grand canyon that was the quadruple spacing, and fell below to a horrible bloody death. The coyotes are feasting on my carcass as we speak.


    So did it get any better after he said his fiance was a cancer?
    Former SCJ now in rehab.

  18. #18
    God/dess Lena's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    I read it all. I recommend a book. It's called Getting The Love You Want (I think?) and there's a workbook too.



  19. #19
    Featured Member scorpio's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Cancer woman (very emotional, can't approach directly, nostalgic, intuitive, holds a grudge, emotionally deep, feels with emotion, has no concept of logic, anti-communicative)
    Gemini (devil may care, shallow emotionally, feels through logic, has little concept of feeling. needs to over communicate)

    so, you have radically different communicative styles, you the Gem wants to directly shove what your feeling (thinking) down her face, to "get it out there"

    She recoils from this (you do it anyways, because, hey, a Gem has to have the last word)

    Your other problem is that you are trying to explain how you feel, and she wants you to demonstrate it. You need to set aside your ego and logical side, sit her down in comfortable place, and admit your true feelings for her. If you sufficiantly pander to her emotional side, and are true (she can detect more bullshit than even a Gem can come up with), and you don't try to get an answer out of her, but rather just "get it off your chest" she may come around. When she's good and ready. Cancers have far more patience than Gems, and that is what she will test you with. Good luck.

  20. #20
    God/dess velvet's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    uggggggggg more newbies with long drawn out problems. a person we dont even know to boot!

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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    good Scorpio! I knew there was some balance out there. It would be nice if people could be as simple as their horoscope profile

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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    If U only knew Maxine. We gonna make it, true love always prevails.
    Its way to easy to just give up at every lil thing. God brought us here, he will bring us home. I'm trying girlfriend.

    Besides u dont even know her..... Nice girl
    Last edited by sir dickie; 01-03-2006 at 10:34 PM.

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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Quote Originally Posted by Lena
    I read it all. I recommend a book. It's called Getting The Love You Want (I think?) and there's a workbook too.
    That is perfect!

  24. #24
    Veteran Member LusciousLyzz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    It took me a few tries to read it all, but I finally did, I don't really know what to say though, It sounds like she's just not too interested.

    Maybe the only reason that you and her can not be apart is because she's a bit antisocial??? And you, just feel so bad for cheating, that you want to make it up to her??

    I don't know because I don't know either of you.

    You really need to find out though, you shouldn't get married if its not going to be forever, divorces are expensive, and can be complicated.

    Try talking to her, maybe suggest a couples counciling???

    Good luck though

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    Default Re: Give it 2 Me Raw

    Quote Originally Posted by LusciousLyzz
    It took me a few tries to read it all, but I finally did, I don't really know what to say though, It sounds like she's just not too interested.

    Maybe the only reason that you and her can not be apart is because she's a bit antisocial??? And you, just feel so bad for cheating, that you want to make it up to her??

    I don't know because I don't know either of you.

    You really need to find out though, you shouldn't get married if its not going to be forever, divorces are expensive, and can be complicated.

    Try talking to her, maybe suggest a couples counciling???

    Good luck though
    thank u 4 the suggestion and well wishes.

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