NoCoverLover - After miraculously surviving a would-be fatal car crash, your life support system is unplugged by the hospital maid, because she needs an outlet in which to plug her vacuum.
Hmmm... The fact that I only ride in a car every two months or so, that'd be damn unlucky!!
Greg - An ill-tempered waiter, dissatisfied with your gratuity, beats you to death with a pepper mill.
OK... This one's not much more likely. I'm usually a pretty good tipper. On the other hand, they say the things you like the most are the most likely to kill you... and I always use a pepper mill.
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