Ok so i have had some bad deals with guys in the past as most of us have. my first and only "long" term boyfriend was nearly 5 years ago now, i have had 1 or 2 month relationships since then but nothing serious, now at the time i was seeing my long term boyf i was still quite young and having some problems at home and i guess you could say he was kinda my sanctuary, somebody i could lean on and trust, after we split i kinda went crazy doing the crazy horizontal dancing with all the boys but now i have calmed down.
The thing is i sometimes i think yeahhhh i would really love a nice boyfriend somebody who i could settle with for a while but then i meet a guy and its all good for a couple of weeks and then i lose interst and want out.
I mean at the moment im seeing a guy and he is sooooo lovely, he's kind, sweet, loving and it was amazing for the 1st month but now im getting all snappy and thinking no i dont want this anymore. I have done this with guys in the past when i have thought they were great then i try and push them away after a few weeks, my ma says im trying to push them away before they can hurt me but i cant get over that icky feeling when i know im starting to feel like i want out and i dont want them to touch me and i start being all snappy.
I know its horrible on the guys and i wish i didnt do it i really do.
Is it just me? will i do this for the rest of my life and maybe never find somebody?
Or is it that there just not the one?
I see all my friends meet guys and have great relationships with them and i think "why cant i do that?"
is there something wrong with me?
Am i a commitmentphobe???????



Reply With Quote

Bookmarks