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Thread: Birthday gifts

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    Veteran Member azdd's Avatar
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    Smiley Birthday gifts

    Hello ladies and gents. I know there have been other threads about giving gifts to dancers, but I have a question that I haven't seen addressed before. My ATF has a birthday coming up, and I was thinking about giving her a gift card to a nice restaurant so she and her long-term BF could have dinner on me. I would love to take her to dinner myself, but that ain't gonna happen, so I thought this would be a nice practical way to show her that I appreciate her and want her to have a nice birthday.

    Question: If you received a gift like this, would you tell your husband or BF that it was from a customer, and would they have a problem with it? Or, would they just enjoy a nice dinner, and not care that it was payed for by some poor schlub who is crazy about his lady?

    I've never met the BF, but I sense that he is totally cool with her dancing. I'm sure he knows she has lots of regulars, but he never comes to the club, so I think he intentionally maintains some distance from her "club" life. The last thing I want to do is create any tension between him and my ATF, which is why I'm posting this question. Thanks in advance for feedback!

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    Featured Member Lyssa Lynn's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    I might feel a little awkward taking my man out for dinner, compliments of a customer. For me if you're going the gift card route..why not an American Express or Visa...that way it's completely up to her where or how she wants to spend it. BTW, very sweet of you to get her a Birthday gift

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    God/dess Corgan's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    My boyfriend understands the relationship between my clients and I. He wouldn't see it as anything but a nice gift.

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    God/dess Casual Observer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Cash is king, dude.
    Idealism is fine, but as it approaches reality, the costs become prohibitive.

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    God/dess cinammonkisses's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Get her a b-day card with money in it! Or a gift card.







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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    I think that it is a really nice idea. Money seems too easy, but it really shows you care if you thought about what would be great for her and her BF. As well, it establishes that you really respect her relationship, something that most custy's don't get!

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    God/dess PaigeDWinter's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    I'd tell him. He knows I get gifts. He knows what I do. He'd probably be thankful since our money has been tight lately LOL.
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    Moderator yoda57us's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    I have favs who would think that it's great and I have favs who would be afraid to tell their BF's where it came from. Every dancer/BF relationship is different and how well your gift would go over will really depend on that. If you are at all in doubt I agree with the idea of a Amex or Visa gift card that she can use however she wants.
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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    My fav is single so a material gift is not an issue. If she were married or in a serious relationship and felt I inclined to give her a "present" (which I probably wouldnt to be honest...in that situation) it would either be cash or a gift card.

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

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    Banned Blade's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    If a custie wants to give Dea a birthday gift( Aug 4 if yer wondering) that we can both use, like a dinner on him, I would appreciate the fuck out of it. If it's a gift for her only, like a pedicure or some sort of massage..again much appreciated
    Roses or flowers suck, specially if (like one of her ex regs) you douse them in your cologne
    I know pretty much every gift she's gotten and sometimes (if I know the reg) I'll thank him myself.

  11. #11
    AlexxaHex
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    I like the cash idea! If a custy gave me a few 100s in a b-day card (or even just one of them), I'd gladly return the favor with a lap dance or two.
    Granted, you are giving a gift that has no expectations of reciprocation, but I would think she'd really appreciate it...I know I woud be very grateful.

    My bf would probably be cool with the restaurant thing, but not all girls' bfs are that understanding.

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    Veteran Member Miss_Eliza's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    I think it is a nice idea. Money is nice but lots of people end up putting it on bills. A gift card forces them to do something nice for themselfs. And no matter how bad someone needs to paybills it is good to treat yourself.

    I think dinner for her and her bf is a great idea. My guy would appreciate it. And if he is not the type that would like it. Then she can lie and say the girls gave it to her. Some may say that she should lie to him about it. But if he is that much of a dumbass that he would have a problem with it. Then he deserves to be lied to.
    You say psycho like it's a bad thing

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    God/dess velvet's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Quote Originally Posted by Corgan
    My boyfriend understands the relationship between my clients and I. He wouldn't see it as anything but a nice gift.

    ditto

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    Veteran Member azdd's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Great feedback everyone, thanks! I understand all the cash suggestions, and I know it would be appreciated. The only problem I have with this is that like most custy-ATF "relationships", our entire interaction in the club ultimately revolves around cash. She dances for me, I give her cash. So, just adding more cash (or a cash gift card) to the pile just doesn't seem to mean as much (bear with me, I know this is PL/RILspeak...), which is why I'm going to go with the nice dinner gift card. My bigger concern was how the BF would react, but your responses have convinced me not to worry about it. I know she likes the restaurant I have in mind, so I think it will go over pretty well.

    Thanks again for all the useful comments!

  15. #15
    Featured Member xoxoGracexoxo's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Who says she HAS to take her boyfriend? If it's a gift card for dinner for two, she could take anyone she wanted to, right? If her bf can't handle it, she can take a girlfriend.
    I'm not sure if my boy would mind in this situation, but I think I might feel awkward. I like to keep my work life and home life pretty far apart.

  16. #16
    Featured Member Prester_John's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Quote Originally Posted by Blade
    If a custie wants to give Dea a birthday gift( Aug 4 if yer wondering) that we can both use, like a dinner on him, I would appreciate the fuck out of it. If it's a gift for her only, like a pedicure or some sort of massage..again much appreciated
    Roses or flowers suck, specially if (like one of her ex regs) you douse them in your cologne
    I know pretty much every gift she's gotten and sometimes (if I know the reg) I'll thank him myself.
    I plan on getting Dea a Lawnmower for her birthday. Does she like upright or riding mowers?

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    God/dess FBR's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Go for a John Deere which is a manly lawn tractor. The cupholder option is not...uh...optional. We all know Blade will commandeer it anyways. He can cruise around the yard cutting the grass and Dea can be all wifely and such and holler from the patio door "Honey, do you need another beer? I know youre thirsty from working so hard." Is that good stuff or what?

    Sorry Dea

    FBR
    Once again I have embraced my addiction and have put off the moral dilemma to another day.

  18. #18
    Veteran Member azdd's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Quote Originally Posted by Prester_John
    I plan on getting Dea a Lawnmower for her birthday. Does she like upright or riding mowers?
    We don't cut grass in Arizona, we just rake rocks...... , unless you live in the valley of "let's make this place look like something other than a desert"!!!

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    Banned Blade's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Quote Originally Posted by [b
    Prester_John][/b]
    I plan on getting Dea a Lawnmower for her birthday. Does she like upright or riding mowers?

    Quote Originally Posted by [b
    FBR][/b]Go for a John Deere which is a manly lawn tractor. The cupholder option is not...uh...optional. We all know Blade will commandeer it anyways. He can cruise around the yard cutting the grass and Dea can be all wifely and such and holler from the patio door "Honey, do you need another beer? I know youre thirsty from working so hard." Is that good stuff or what?

    Sorry Dea

    FBR
    LMAO You two are funny!

    Quote Originally Posted by azdd
    We don't cut grass in Arizona, we just rake rocks...... , unless you live in the valley of "let's make this place look like something other than a desert"!!!
    too true, I never thought I'd see a day where a lawnmower was as useless as tits on a bull,lol

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    Senior Member poriland4's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    maybe some diet pills will do it.....
    It's TOO BAD SHE'LL won't LAST, BUT then again WHO DOES!?

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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Quote Originally Posted by poriland4
    maybe some diet pills will do it.....
    HUH? I seem to be lost here

  22. #22
    God/dess holiday's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    ya, what did that mean?

  23. #23
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Azdd, you are a rare regular indeed. Most regulars who get wind of a boyfriend or husband are out the door. LOL.

    ALWAYS realize that cash is why we are working. Most of us don't want gifts, we want CA$H.

    If for example, you usually buy $100 in dances when you come in the club, then buy those $100 in dances, AND give her $200 on top of that for the birthday present , so that the cash you give her is above and beyond what you spend in the club.

    The card is not necessary. We don't usually keep those anyway. You sound like a really nice guy, but just remember, it's all about the cash.

  24. #24
    God/dess fancygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    I don't know...if a card was super funny, beautiful or insightful...I'd keep it. And I think the post about people putting money towards bills and not treating themselves is right on. It's going to depend on what type of woman your dancer is, but I would totally dig gift card, and birthday card....and maybe some big fat balloons

  25. #25
    Veteran Member azdd's Avatar
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    Default Re: Birthday gifts

    Quote Originally Posted by Tina
    Azdd, you are a rare regular indeed. Most regulars who get wind of a boyfriend or husband are out the door. LOL.
    Don't think for a second that I don't fantasize about winning the lottery, leaving my wife, and her leaving her BF, and the two of us living on a beach somewhere having incredible sex all day and all night........yeah, that would indeed be pretty cool, which is why it's such a great fantasy!

    Quote Originally Posted by Tina
    ALWAYS realize that cash is why we are working. Most of us don't want gifts, we want CA$H.

    If for example, you usually buy $100 in dances when you come in the club, then buy those $100 in dances, AND give her $200 on top of that for the birthday present , so that the cash you give her is above and beyond what you spend in the club.
    I know, I get that. BUT, this girl is very popular, and banks very well almost every day. So, four more 50s on top of that isn't any different than just another regular stopping in that day (and she has a lot of regulars). She would certainly appreciate a cash gift, but I want to give her something that she and her BF can enjoy, that she might not do for herself except for the fact that the restaurant gift card can only be spent at the restaurant.


    Quote Originally Posted by Tina
    The card is not necessary. We don't usually keep those anyway. You sound like a really nice guy, but just remember, it's all about the cash.
    Oh come on! I want her to put my cheesy birthday card with the very special handwritten note that I agonized over for hours on her nightstand and read it before she goes to sleep every night ....kidding...really.... But seriously, I wasn't going to give her a card at all, just the gift card in it's little envelope with a kiss on the cheek and a wish for a great birthday!

    Thanks again to everyone for great advice!

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