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Thread: mean girls???

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    Default mean girls???

    i will be starting dancing in a couple of weeks and am nervous about alot of things including getting on stage the first time. i'm also worried about how the other girls might be like. what is the general atmoshpere like before you go on? is there a dressing room where all the girls get ready together?

    i'm sure most girls will be nice/down to earth...but i'm sure there will be some that are catty also. can anyone offer their experiences/tips on dealing with possible negative energy from other girls? i am a sensitive person so this kind of scares me. thanks

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    God/dess KamrynAnne's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    oh get ready for some cattiness.. it comes with the business.. don't be quick to trust someone who's really nice to you since you're a newcomer... me and others on her could tell you stories about some of the crazy things girls have done or said to other dancers....

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    Featured Member MadisonM's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    When I first started dancing, I just kept to myself and didn't really talk to any of the other girls. I didn't make friends with any of the girls until I had been working there for almost 4 months. I didn't know who to trust and who not to trust, so I just kept away from everyone. Once I was working there for a while, I kind of got a feel for everyone else's personalities and now I'm friends with most of the girls that work at my club. Just be nice to everyone, but don't get close to anyone right away. It's ok to make small talk and chat with the other girls in the dressing room, but don't reveal anything too personal that could possibly be used against you until you know everyone a little better.
    Take the road less traveled- just make sure you have a map.

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    Default Re: mean girls???

    If you're a sensative person, then what the hell are you doing dancing?! You'll get 'negatives' from both sides of the equation: fellow co-workers (not just other dancers) and the patrons themselves !! You really really need a thick skin or to grow one quickly in order to really do well in this business.

    There is a reason why this is not for everyone nor do I encourage every to try it. Only the strong survive and even then... they have 'baggage' due to it (speaking about myself and others).

    Go in to the club, be friendly (say hi if someone says hi to you... allow them to initiate the conversation/contact) yet keep busy (try to stay out of the dressing room as much as possible and if you do find yourself 'hanging' in the dressing room with the other dancers then be the quiet one.. allow the other dancers to do the speaking.. or find a mag/book to read so you don't have to interact with the other girls).


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    God/dess Pretty_Penny's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    reputable clubs don't deal with overly catty bitches. you're bound to run into some girls who are stuck up or whatever, but as far as the really crazy horror stories go, most good clubs will kick a girl out for that shit. just be yourself and ignore the bullshit, because it's going to happen anywhere. i'm just saying you can cut down on the ammount of crap you have to deal with by working somewhere with good management. also, never trust anyone. lock your things up. don't lend anyone anything you intend on getting back unless you've known them for quite awhile. don't be upset if girls don't act all friendly with you or let you close to them instantly either. it doesn't mean they're catty, it means they're looking out for themselves.

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    Veteran Member AlluringAva's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    In general let's be honest. Some if not a lot of women can be bitches. My advice is my own: I stay away from the ones who gossip constantly, and am polite and say hello to everyone, but I don't divulge personal stuff about my life to people I meet in person over there ( the girls). It's weird how online it's easier but that's because we're obviously not working at the same place.

    I've found through experience that the ones who are immediately real friendly and intrusive with a lot of questions are the ones to really watch out for. Sometimes the ones who are quiet, who keep to themselves, do so for exactly the reasons I do...to stay private.


    I have my ears and eyes open at all times. I don't carry my wallet into the club or anything of value except a few costumes and the shoes, and a bag of makeup. Believe it or not makeup gets stolen, even the ( YUK) used stuff. Most of the girls are a lot younger than me so they don't have a lot in common in terms of every day talk...I just keep my distance, smile and be polite. If you don't talk about others they won't have much to say about you either.

    Mostly, some of the girls have nothing else going for them BUT work at the club...so they are the ones who can a little troublesome. And I don't hang out with anyone or socialize outside the club.

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    Default Re: mean girls???

    I know it sounds bad, but in my club I am the "stuck up" one that new girls think is bitchy. But in reality it is that I don't trust the new dancers who try really hard to get to know me on their first day. My club has girls work an hour, a day, you get the idea, so when a girl comes in and wants to play 20 questions I get annoyed. It's not that I don't like people, but unless you are going to be around for a while don't expect me to get to know you.
    If that sounds bitchy, sorry. When I first started dancing girls were mean, evil mean. I stuck through it and now work in clubs all over the country; Vegas, Nashville, Atlanta, NYC, New Orleans. But if you are sensitive to the point that it will really bother your confidence for people to not greet you with open arms, you may want to make sure this is really what you want to do.

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    Senior Member kirbie_kyle's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    I just worked (1st time EVER) yesterday, and I was actually pretty nervous too. People always make false assumptions and assume I'm cocky (I'm so not, I'm the biggest klutz) but I just played it real modest and complimented everyone else. Just be really sweet so the bitchy ones feel like sh*t when they try to be mean. Good luck

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    Default Re: mean girls???

    Quote Originally Posted by kiki_and_lala
    i will be starting dancing in a couple of weeks and am nervous about alot of things including getting on stage the first time. i'm also worried about how the other girls might be like. what is the general atmoshpere like before you go on? is there a dressing room where all the girls get ready together?

    i'm sure most girls will be nice/down to earth...but i'm sure there will be some that are catty also. can anyone offer their experiences/tips on dealing with possible negative energy from other girls? i am a sensitive person so this kind of scares me. thanks
    I am asked by a lot of customers if our girls fight and honestly, they really don't. We have a classy group of girls and most of us make decent money. I think what causes a lot of fighting is that the group of girls don't have anything to do and they are just use to handling things in that manner or it is allowed. We have a housemom so that helps a lot too. I wouldn't worry so much about the other girls. Worry about yourself and what you need to do to make money. If someone happens to bother you then tell the manager. I was scared my first night too. I had a friend come and sit for night while I danced. It helped to know that someone was with me and I could leave if I got uncomfortable.

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    Veteran Member AlluringAva's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    Quote Originally Posted by KamrynAnne
    oh get ready for some cattiness.. it comes with the business.. don't be quick to trust someone who's really nice to you since you're a newcomer... me and others on her could tell you stories about some of the crazy things girls have done or said to other dancers....

    I agree. It's like I said too...you know, the ones who appear the friendliest are the ones who often will try to use that against a girl. My advice is just to be nice but distant. Because it's a competitive atomosphere, be prepared for some cattiness. I like to think of cattiness as the MEOW factor. So far on a scale of one to ten since I am a newcomer and work during the day when there are only 8-10 girls, the meow factor at my place is fairly low...

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    Veteran Member AlluringAva's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    Quote Originally Posted by kirbie_kyle
    I just worked (1st time EVER) yesterday, and I was actually pretty nervous too. People always make false assumptions and assume I'm cocky (I'm so not, I'm the biggest klutz) but I just played it real modest and complimented everyone else. Just be really sweet so the bitchy ones feel like sh*t when they try to be mean. Good luck

    At least I know I'm not the only one whose heart was beating hard the first time I got up on stage. I almost went home that day!!!!!!

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    Default Re: mean girls???

    Quote Originally Posted by MadisonM
    When I first started dancing, I just kept to myself and didn't really talk to any of the other girls. I didn't make friends with any of the girls until I had been working there for almost 4 months.
    Same with me. When I first started, I talked to NO ONE. I learned on here (from Pamela, I miss you girl) that I'm here to work, and not make friends. So I practically drilled that in my head.

    I will say that just cause I'm quiet, I'm not a bitch. I'm cordial to people. But when they get to gossipping about another dancer, I either just smile and get back to work, or tell them it's not nice to talk about folk behind their backs.

    I'm still not friends with any of them, but there are a handful who I'll help get dances for, and vice versa.







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    Senior Member TaraDoll's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    I'll be honest when I say yes a lot of drama goes on within our club, but the girls really do treat eachother like family. We're a smaller club so that probably helps out a lot. We celebrate eachother's birthdays, hang out OTC. I really like the girls I work with.
    Good luck to you, and hopefully you can find a nice place to work at where you can get along with some of the girls.

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    Featured Member MadisonM's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    Quote Originally Posted by TaraDoll
    I'll be honest when I say yes a lot of drama goes on within our club, but the girls really do treat eachother like family. We're a smaller club so that probably helps out a lot. We celebrate eachother's birthdays, hang out OTC. I really like the girls I work with.
    Same here. I work in a really small club, so we all hang out once in a while and we celebrate everyone's birthday by going out to eat the Sunday after their birthday. We all get along (for the most part) but there is some drama.
    Take the road less traveled- just make sure you have a map.

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    Senior Member kirbie_kyle's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    Quote Originally Posted by AlluringAva
    At least I know I'm not the only one whose heart was beating hard the first time I got up on stage. I almost went home that day!!!!!!
    Ava, you have no excuse, if I looked like you I'd be confident as all get out LOL, ut's hard to think on your feet up there...

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    Senior Member raelene's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    The main difference is that in Western Canada you will be in different club each week so if you don't get on with someone one week, she's not working with you the next week

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    Default Re: mean girls???

    Great advice girls. I'm new on this forum and everyone is so friendly on here I'm having lot's of fun reading all this helpfull information since I'm gonna start dancing in about a month or so for the first time. My first concern is how the other girls will treat me. I have been always told that I am a very sweet and social person and i've never really had any problems with not getting along with girls exept the ones that are overly jealous. However, my sister-in-law and my husband's ex fiance are dancers too, and he has told me some horror stories about what other girls do to mostly new girls....and trust me it sounds scary! I'm pretty sure I will fine though because like most of you did, I will keep to myself and focus on working and making money instead of making friends at first. I think thats the best approach to this matter. As far as negative comments, the best to do is act like you didn't even hear anything.
    Does anyone have any first time bad experiences with other girls?
    I would love to hear them so I can be kinda prepared of what might happen.

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    Default Re: mean girls???

    This never happened to me, but happened at the club of a friend of mine. She was a relatively new dancer at that point, and when all of the girls were in the dressing room getting ready for the night, a fight broke out. I think one of the girls was accusing another of stealing her regular. The first girl was so angry that she took a hot curling iron and threw it at the second girl. Dunno if it hit, dunno what happened after.

    That is the worst horror story that I've heard.

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    Default Re: mean girls???

    hey everyone Im new
    i WANT TO START DANCING but im scarred of how the strippers will treat me
    2.seeing someone I know personally from my past walk into the strip cliub and recognize me

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    Default Re: mean girls???

    ^^^ You couldn't have read this thread....







    Some Douchebag: "[Pimp C] 12:43 am: its true we got to stick together the black people on SW CK you is teh condoleeza of SW"


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    Veteran Member katerina29's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    Go and try the clubs. If there is a bad atmosphere in one club move on to another. My old club was really hostile and the girls were immature. The club that I;m at now is totally different, the girls are either really friendy or they don't bother you. A decent atmosphere makes it easier to make money.

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    Veteran Member Natalia108's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    teh best advice i could give you is do your job get your money and go home at the end of the day.. really thats all that you are there for .. let them say what they want its their problem not yours .. being jealous is a curse and it will only eat them up inside if you dont react to it

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    Featured Member MsClaireVoyant's Avatar
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    Default Re: mean girls???

    The absolute worst that could happen, if someone was THAT horrible to you that you couldnt stand it, is walk out. If someone physically assaults you, you can call the police. I say just watch your back, your stuff, your money, like I would in any situation in life.

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    Default Re: mean girls???

    They'll be nice to you- just don't act like a diva. Be honest about how new you are, and most girls' momma bear instinct will kick in. We're lucky out here, the competitiveness is low so so is the drama.

    Don't brag about money, ever. You'll probably do quite well, and make more than the other girls in tips due to being 'different' (asian- you'll be like the second or third asian girl dancing in western Canada), your measurements, and your newness. Downplay it or else you WILL be dealing with drama.

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