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Thread: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

  1. #1
    Member Liliana's Avatar
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    Default Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    So I auditioned for a club I really liked that was smaller and in a college town (I'm in CO) and got in. I loved the cluband that plus my other job would have been enough to suport myself. Then my employer at my other house (housekeeping) started to demand in emails that perform other "services" for him. I didn't want to, and I lost that job. So I went to Denver to audition for one of the clubs there since I had a lead on an apartment in the city. It was horrible and humiliating. Manager told me to come at 8 for amateur night. I came at 8 and they made me wait in the lobby/front desk for 25 minutes in front of the customers(who kept looking me over) then I was shuffled around and told I would have to wait 2 and a half hours in the club mingling before i cold get on stage. The amateur night was a contest and no one told me ANYTHING. I didn't know if it was my audition, if getting hired depended on winning or what. They pulled me aside and told me the "rules" of dancing but I saw every single one being broken on stage and no one getting tipped unless they did. I finally got to go up on stage, did my thing, then had to mingle with customers for another hour. Then I had to go up on stage when they announced the winner. The whole time I felt awful in the club. I know I'm a newbie and the other club I was going to work for was small but I just had no idea what I was supposed to do...Customers kept coming up to me and asking to get private dances...no explained whether or not I was allowed to yet (some of the other contestants were) Then I had 2 customers proposition me for sex.
    After the announcement of the winners, The manager called me into the office. I told her I probably wouldn't be working there, thanked her for her time.
    I guess I just got really shaken. The other club was low contact and I didn't realize how high contact "high contact" really was. I just feel so humilated at how naive I was...I really have tried to do my reasearch. I'm a good dancer, good conversationalist...I just couldn't stand the idea of having to get groped every night to make my $$$
    This not a diss ont he girls there...All the dancers were very nice and I admire them for their hard work...it was just completely different then my other experience. At the smaller club I felt in control and safe...here I felt so incredibly vulnerable.
    I have no problem with getting naked, or hustling I just got such awful vibes and felt so humiliated the whole time I wonder if maybe I should just give up on stripping. I just desperately need the money.
    Because I can't find a second job in Fort Collins (place where smaller club is) I will probably have to live move back to Indiana to live with my parents and work 3 minimum wage jobs.....I just don't know what to do.
    I feel embarrassed writing this email...I know that most of the horribleness was due to my naivte....I just don't know what to do.

  2. #2
    God/dess
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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    Oh, honey, plenty of experienced dancers have walked out of clubs because the level of contact there was outside of their comfort level; it's not a "naive" thing to recognize that. Did you go to any of the other clubs in the city? There might be one there that you feel happier with.

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    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    awww..i dont think u shud give up!!! jus keep lookin for other clubs!!! working 3 minium wage jobs doesnt sound good

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    Veteran Member SexeJaz's Avatar
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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    Oh My...! 3 jobs, sounds like that could really wear you out.

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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    Quote Originally Posted by Liliana
    ...went to Denver to audition for one of the clubs there since I had a lead on an apartment in the city. It was horrible and humiliating. Manager told me to come at 8 for amateur night. I came at 8 and they made me wait in the lobby/front desk for 25 minutes in front of the customers(who kept looking me over) then I was shuffled around and told I would have to wait 2 and a half hours in the club mingling before i could get on stage.
    That's (a) incompetent management and (b) bad manners. Neither of which were your fault, and hence you shouldn't regard it as anything to do with you personally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Liliana
    The amateur night was a contest and no one told me ANYTHING. I didn't know if it was my audition, if getting hired depended on winning or what. They pulled me aside and told me the "rules" of dancing but I saw every single one being broken on stage and no one getting tipped unless they did.
    The rules were being bent by the dancers because they knew they earned more if they did, and management allowed it because it bought more customers into the club. The fact the rules were being bent suggested this wasn't the first time some of the girls had danced on amateur night - or how would they have known they could either do it, or get away with it? Sooner or later the club will get legal problems because they're probably working outside the terms of their license.

    Quote Originally Posted by Liliana
    Customers kept coming up to me and asking to get private dances...no explained whether or not I was allowed to yet (some of the other contestants were) Then I had 2 customers proposition me for sex....I didn't realize how high contact "high contact" really was...I just couldn't stand the idea of having to get groped every night to make my $$$..
    You will always get a percentage of predatory customers coming into a strip club seeking as much contact as they can get. The fact that you were propositioned twice for sex and the degree of contact was very high suggests this is a club that hasn't discouraged those customers. It might not be nice for you, but from the club's point of view a reputation for being high contact probably keeps bringing a certain class of customer through the door.

    As Susan said, every dancer has her comfort level. Absolutely nothing wrong with deciding that for you, this wasn't a place to work. After all, you're the person that has to look at yourself in the mirror the next morning and think; "I wish I hadn't done that".

    Quote Originally Posted by Liliana
    ...here I felt so incredibly vulnerable. I have no problem with getting naked, or hustling I just got such awful vibes and felt so humiliated the whole time I wonder if maybe I should just give up on stripping....I know that most of the horribleness was due to my naivte...
    Why was the horribleness down to your naivite? You went along to an amateur night. Any self-respecting manager would have made sure that you knew what you had to do, that you weren't kept waiting about in a public area and that you were generally looked after.

    The very definition of amateur night suggests to be that some girls at least won't know the ropes, so they should have had better arrangements in place. Don't apologise because the manager didn't know his job.

    Quote Originally Posted by Liliana
    maybe I should just give up on stripping.
    If you're comfortable with the nudity and the hustling - and dancing will give you the income you need - then don't give up. You just need to find a club which you're comfortable working at. Hopefully you'll find what you want, and your money worries will ease.

    Phil.

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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    what club was that at? i was probably working there at the time. i am working at a different club you should try before giving up.

  7. #7
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    Sounds like a typical Amateur Night around here, too.

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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    All clubs are different. And it's perfectly ok not to be comfortable with the level of contact, espeically when you are new. I started dancing in a bikini!! So, shop around and look for another club that suits you. There will be one out there!

    Good luck

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    Veteran Member dancinslifoxxx17's Avatar
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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    I think a lot of girls go through this. I worked at 2 diff. clubs for a total of 3 hrs. The clubs and mang. were fine. It was just all the nasty crap that was going on out on the floor! Not just in private areas. I feel I can't compete w/ those girls. I'm more of a verbal hustla. When some girls are a very very physical hustla it discourages me from making $$$ Just take a look at some other places hun
    It takes 46 muscles to frown but only 4 to flip 'em the bird

    Blessed Be

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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    Liliana, ALL clubs that have you audition and or have amateur nights involves hanging around the club for 2-3 hours. It sucks but that is the way it is.

    While you were hanging around you SHOULD HAVE sold dances to the guys who wanted them. You always try to make your money while you are waiting. The manager doesn't care and isn't paying attention to you anyway. Getting hit on for sex is par for the course in this business. You have to be numb to guys who ask for that if you intend to dance.

    Here's the reality. YOU HAD THE JOB. YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN HIRED. YOU SHOULD NOT HAVE TOLD THE MANAGER YOU WOULDN"T BE WORKING THERE.

    Some clubs only hire during amateur nights. One manager told me that I would be hired at a club that wanted everyone to be in the contest. He said the contest was just a formality and a promotion to drum up business.Winning the contest has nothing to do with being hired.

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    God/dess blondhottie's Avatar
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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    Tina, I usually agree with your posts, but I have to disagree with you on this one. She did the right thing by not giving dances to the customers who wanted them. She wasn't working there yet and at a lot of places, you can't do dances until you get hired. I work in a lot of small clubs and at smaller clubs, the manager DOES notice if a girl who hasn't been hired yet is giving dances, and it's a sure way to piss off the other dancers too.

  12. #12
    Member Liliana's Avatar
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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    Well, thank you everyone for your advice and thoughts. I'll keep looking around and now at least I have a better idea of what to expect. Since I hadn't been to a big strip club in a larger city before I think I just wasn't prepared....I appreciate everyone taking the time to give advice and support.

    -Lili

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    Veteran Member SexyGemini's Avatar
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    Default Re: Horrible Newbie Experience...don't know what to do

    Keep looking and don't stay anywhere you feel uncomfortable. Good luck!
    I comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable.

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