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Thread: Life And Death

  1. #1
    madmaxine
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    Default Life And Death

    Hi, everyone, I'm glad to be back on SW.
    I have had my issues, but it seems like so many around me have suffered so much worse. In the past 6 months I have been to 4 funerals with one more coming soon (neighbor has cancer.)

    My cousin in the Army is also coming home from Iraq (on leave for 1 week.) He's killed people, seen his friends die, and that was just his 1st tour. He's getting through his 2nd tour.

    I KNOW this is a heavy thread, but I thought it might put things in perspective for some....during my cousin's first tour, I used to think every day that I had no right to complain about my life when he was getting shot at..."Every day above ground is a good day."

    One of my dislikes of the stripping biz is that it makes unimportant things seem so all-consuming....and the petty crap looms so large....I have been forced into temporary retirement from dancing, and my worldview is being corrected, not always to my liking LOL. But it's so easy to forget what life is really all about.

  2. #2
    Featured Member francescadubois's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Amen, maxine. I feel the same way. When I catch myself bitching or complaining I say to myself, "Someone didn't wake up this morning. Someone can't use their arms or legs." My closest cousin, who is like my brother, is on his THIRD tour. They keep telling him he can come home to visit, then pushing the dates back. It's so wrong. Sometimes I cry just thinking about him.

    We should all be grateful for what we have, even when we are struggling to pay the bills, or our car is broken down, our boyfriend said something dumb, or our dog poooped in the house.

    Thank the power greater than you every day for waking up this morning.
    "I came in like a lamb, but I intend to leave like a lion."

    -Sade
    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus View Post
    The only thing a person hates more than being a sex object, is NOT being a sex object.
    Quote Originally Posted by TigersMilk View Post
    If you should your way through life you'll be should-ing all over yourself later.
    Quote Originally Posted by TheSexKitten View Post
    Finger pointing is awesome!! No really, it gets things done.

  3. #3
    Featured Member Prester_John's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Quote Originally Posted by madmaxine
    Hi, everyone, I'm glad to be back on SW.
    I have had my issues, but it seems like so many around me have suffered so much worse. In the past 6 months I have been to 4 funerals with one more coming soon (neighbor has cancer.)

    My cousin in the Army is also coming home from Iraq (on leave for 1 week.) He's killed people, seen his friends die, and that was just his 1st tour. He's getting through his 2nd tour.

    I KNOW this is a heavy thread, but I thought it might put things in perspective for some....during my cousin's first tour, I used to think every day that I had no right to complain about my life when he was getting shot at..."Every day above ground is a good day."

    One of my dislikes of the stripping biz is that it makes unimportant things seem so all-consuming....and the petty crap looms so large....I have been forced into temporary retirement from dancing, and my worldview is being corrected, not always to my liking LOL. But it's so easy to forget what life is really all about.
    In the summer of 2001 I was going through the convulsions of the death of my marriage. Not that I could have helped it, but it was all consuming in my life. I went through a lot of internal "why is this happening to me" pathos. The only saving grace was that I internalized most of it, saving the people I knew from being dumped on with my problems day after day

    Then September 11, 2001 happened. And, it happened to people I knew. Suddenly my all consuming personal pain, confusion and rage was insignificant.

    We truly need to know and truly need to remember what life really is all about.

  4. #4
    Banned All Good Things's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    MM, I'm so very happy to see you back. We missed you. I wasn't sure where the hell you disappeared to -- and for so long -- but our little group here is not the same without you. We miss your playful, erotic, amusing, insightful, sarcastic wisdom. Really sarcastic wisdom. Your comments on guys and dating alone are worth their weight in 24-carat gold.

    I'm very happy to know that you are healthy, safe and in a good state of mind. I'm not sure why you've left dancing temporarily, but there must be a good reason. I'm sure you will share it with us in good time.

    So the thread is a little dark -- no surprise given the topic.

    I'll share some stories with you, perhaps by PM, when you have some time to talk. It's a crazy time for a lot of us right now; I'm making a flurry of final arrangements for Vegas before I leave DC, flying out tomorrow morning to set up things for the StripperFest. But your appearance is a welcome surprise that brings a smile to my face and I'm sure to many others'. Welcome back, baby. We have missed you so much.

  5. #5
    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Trust me, Madmaxine--I know exactly where you are coming from, and you already know why.

    All the petty concerns and ego games that are among the most glaring drawbacks of the stripclub scene do seem pretty trivial, after going through seeing people close to you robbed of life for no apparent reason.

    Good to see you back...
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

    ______________________________________

  6. #6
    God/dess Gynger's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Welcome back MM... I was also worried about you...

    yes, and amen, the perspective of life has a way of changing once we look through it from a different set of eyes.

    I hope your cousin is ok, my husband returns for his second tour in three months...


    [/URL]
    [/URL]



  7. #7
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Thank you all. I can't discuss on the board why I've had to excuse myself from dancing- I am upset about it...money years are dwindling down the drain. But nothing can be done.

    One of the hardest lessons this year came from one of my life mentors dying suddenly. He was my teacher and I never went to visit him when I had the chance because I dropped out of college & I thought he would be disappointed in me....I finally worked up the nerve to go see him, and he died before I could. I never even got to call. There were more than 300 people at his funeral. He was a great guy.
    The lesson was..."It's too late when we die to admit we don't see eye to eye..." I can't think of a better way to put it...I wish I had gotten to tell him to this day, I took everything he said as gospel, even though I turned out to be so different from him. He encouraged my sense of humor....you have Mr. L. to thank for my attempts at humor on here.

  8. #8
    Member SA-80's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Russian Special forces have a tradition:
    Before every mission each member tells every other:
    "Forgive me and good bye" (in Russian it sounds with a much easier flow of 2 words sort of like "Forgive and Farewell")
    I think it's the smartest thing to do.

    Men are made to fight and dye, it's way down in our instincts. I'm always amazed of my fearless inner warrior, even though I'm not a tough guy on the outside. This warrior is what I'm mostly proud of, is what others call "drive", is what makes me a businessman and enterpreneur and what saves me from the heartbreak, pushes me forward, gives me strength.
    I think women will never understand this urge and most of them deny it in their sons thinking that it will calm them down and make them more normal (feminine that is)... (Oh God, how hard it is to forgive them later on for that and forgive myself for listening)...

    Anyway. Live for this moment. It's the only moment you live and enjoy.

    Life is a great thing!
    :-)

  9. #9
    Jay Zeno
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Maxie, good to see you back. I'm sorry for your struggles right now.

    Perspective is good. In fact, true perspective is a gift, cosmic or divine, however you wish to see it.

    There's more to say, lots more, but for a different time. Welcome back. Be well.

  10. #10
    Featured Member lunchbox's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Nice to see you back. Best wishes on all fronts.

  11. #11
    Veteran Member big_daddyII's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    "Someone didn't wake up this morning. Someone can't use their arms or legs." ..."Every day above ground is a good day."

    Yep this is the way I try to look at it. It's hard sometimes but I think it's the way to be. We all have something we think is the end of the world but we know it's not. I always say "it could be worse", most of the time it can be. Max sorry your having a bad time in your life, I hope it gets better soon!
    “Since the ACLU is trying to take away the word ‘Christmas,’ we thought it would be a great time to send the group a Christmas card this year. If everybody did this, they would be buried in mail.”

  12. #12
    Featured Member francescadubois's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    I want to recommend two of the best songs I have ever heard for inspiration. Check them out and see if you like them:

    1. Tomorrow- Quincy Jones w/Tevin Campbell (has a children chorus. Children's voices touch my heart.

    2. Optimistic- Sounds of Blackness ("As long as you keep your head to the sky, you can win)

    Seriously, if you have like 10 minutes being idle and just typing on SW, download these songs. They work wonders for me.

    Any other inspirational songs you guys know?
    "I came in like a lamb, but I intend to leave like a lion."

    -Sade
    Quote Originally Posted by Mastridonicus View Post
    The only thing a person hates more than being a sex object, is NOT being a sex object.
    Quote Originally Posted by TigersMilk View Post
    If you should your way through life you'll be should-ing all over yourself later.
    Quote Originally Posted by TheSexKitten View Post
    Finger pointing is awesome!! No really, it gets things done.

  13. #13
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    I really love Jim Carroll Band's "People Who Died" because he sings very honest and heartfelt verses about people he cared about who passed on. "Nobody's Hero" by Rush is a great song too, even for people who don't like Rush : P It reminds me of all the people who live with the extra burden of tragedy but have to hide it from others.

    There's a Puerto Rican traditional song about living life to the fullest, my roommate sang it to me once but I forgot what the title was......No, it wasn't "Party Hearty, Drink Bacardi" : P

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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Quote Originally Posted by francescadubois
    ...Any other inspirational songs you guys know?
    It's getting older now, but Bill Wither's "Lean On Me," which can refer to someone in your family, a close friend, whomever/whatever you might believe God to be, etc. It all depends how you yourself "see" it.

  15. #15
    Featured Member Hello_Kitty27's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Hey madmaxine, like I said in PM, I'm glad to see you back. Sorry you're going through these tough times.

    I've been in a similar boat as far as loss goes and there were never any words that truly made me feel better.

    That being said, I hope that time heals your wounds, even if only slightly.








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  16. #16
    Veteran Member Docido's Avatar
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    Default Re: Life And Death

    Good to see you back MM. I hope that you're "dark night of the soul" will pass soon. I know that no matter what happens, you will meet it with courage and understanding. Here's wishing you nothing but good life, love, and happiness.
    Summer afternoon - Summer afternoon... the two most beautiful words in the English language. Henry James

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