Results 1 to 21 of 21

Thread: Good convo and NO sale

  1. #1
    Member Lilitu's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Bay Area, CA
    Posts
    20
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Sad Good convo and NO sale

    I just had my first night at the Gold Club in SF and it was SO completely discouraging. It showed me what a rotten hustler I am! I worked in Sunnyvale before at clubs where you get most of your money from stage shows and lap dances aren't even allowed, so I've never had to really sell dances before. God do I need help :-(

    I can make good conversation....a little too good. I end up engaging guys in conversations that are far too long. They get really enthusiastic about talking with me but it usually involves intellectual conversations, discussion of hobbies, wines, traveling....etc,..and I have NO idea how to convert that into selling dances.

    The undertones of the conversations aren't sexual, so the mood doesn't feel right to ask for a dance.......and I'm not good at playing up the whole "oh baby, you and I in the back room with some naughty time" thing. But I wonder if this is my problem?

    I'm no sex bunny. But I'm strong, creative and intelligent.
    How can I make that intelligence a sensual thing?

    Any tips for steering these (supposedly) non-sexual conversations??

  2. #2
    God/dess anomar's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    2,373
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    "Hey, I'm really enjoying this conversation and I'm glad we've been able to have so much in common aobut [x]. Why don't we talk in the VIP/lapdance area? It's a lot quieter and we won't be bothered." (smile and get pretty happy when you say it)

    Give yourself about 2 songs' worth of convo before you ask, that way you'll have had the time to get just about to the point of really engaging in conversation and also not wasting too much time.

    If they say no then you can explain to them that you've been really enjoying the convo, but that you're there with the intention of $$ in mind. If they say some poop like how you should keep talking after work, tell them that work is the only time you get a chance to really relax and talk in the first place (and that you can really relax and talk in VIP!).

    Obviously tailor it to your needs... but if it's feeling like he's really enjoying the convo, then definitely definitely carry it into a sale. If he won't buy, then excuse yourself asap, but keep on good terms with him so you can sit with him in the future...

  3. #3
    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Key West
    Posts
    16,343
    Thanks
    1,395
    Thanked 5,487 Times in 2,768 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Long term, there are some guys that this will really pay with--but only in certain kinds of clubs, and only certain guys. Don't lose this ability, though--even if you need to be more of a hustler ordinarily.

    There are some guys who will pay a lot of money just to enjoy the conversation of an intelligent, charming woman--who just happens to be extremely sexy, as well, lol...
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

    ______________________________________

  4. #4
    Curious Guest
    Joined
    Jun 2006
    Location
    San Francisco
    Posts
    2
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Sad Re: Good convo and NO sale

    It's funny--I just started at the Gold Club as well and am having exactly the same problem. I get into conversations that are stimulating and interesting, but that paint me as more of a friend than a fantasy. I have a compulsion to humanize myself to them; I guess I feel like I'd rather sell the fantasy of a well-read down to earth good girl than a transparent hustler. I intend to sit with them and make them feel special in order to sell them a dance, but we get stuck in the conversation and it doesn't move forward, or at least it takes forever before it moves forward.

    I'm going to take the advice of the other ladies on this site and sit with guys for 2 songs while I whisper some good conversation in their ear, and then explain that we can continue getting to know one another in a more private area (like the champagne room, or in the back area for some private dances), and if he doesn't bite, I'll explain that it's been lovely sitting with him and resting my feet, but I'd better get back to work ("I hope you understand, sweetheart"). That's my resolution. I need to think of the conversation as a marketable product that should be paid for up front, rather than as the incentive to pay for something else. Whew.

    Good luck and big money!
    xoxo

  5. #5
    Featured Member Crow's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Down South
    Posts
    1,145
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 10 Times in 8 Posts
    My Mood
    Happy

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    First tip of a guy that wont get a dance - He won't get you a drink. When the waitress comes over and asks the gent if he'll get you a drink always get something. Even if it is just a soda. If he wont get you something to drink, he wont get a dance from you.

    NOW, there ARE exceptions to this rule, then again they are rare. Couple this with the two/three song rule and you will be fabulous.

    Good luck and wishes for large cash!!!

  6. #6
    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
    Joined
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Key West
    Posts
    16,343
    Thanks
    1,395
    Thanked 5,487 Times in 2,768 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    If the guy is really enjoying the conversation, you could turn this to your advantage, too, by telling him how unusual it is to be able to relax and enjoy a cool customer for a change--make him feel special--then sigh and say you hate to break off such an interesting conversation, but you have to make X amount of dollars, so you have to get back to work.

    So you are telling him two things--he is fun and different and special (he'll love this!), and that you are at work, and need to get paid. Unless he is deluding himself by thinking he's establishing a romantic relationship, he'll be motivated to pay you for your time, and/or possibly get a dance.

    Won't work with everyone, but it couldn't hurt, and it's a graceful way of excusing yourself, while planting the seed in his mind that he might want to come back (with money), and build the rapport.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

    ______________________________________

  7. #7
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    575
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 176 Times in 70 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    It's tough to know which guys will enjoy a lot of conversation and which ones just need a reason to get a dance. At my old club, there were hardly any guys who wanted to talk, at my new club conversation is much more important.

    Good conversation will get you regulars, but won't work as well at getting you consistent money every night. I think the two song rule is good. Try not to get into any conversations that are too in depth in the first song or two. Having a connection is good, but I have been down the "too much information" route many times. Once you realize that you both love brand X of coffee, think that global warming is a terrible problem, and had a ford contour that broke down on you a million times, he knows too much to just want to see you naked. Then he just wants to ask for your number, ugh. Save the lengthy conversations for guys you see a lot, or who you can tell really want to talk and are willing to pay for it.

  8. #8
    Featured Member hot4ablackchick's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2006
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    1,346
    Thanks
    83
    Thanked 265 Times in 150 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Quote Originally Posted by carolina6
    Having a connection is good, but I have been down the "too much information" route many times. Once you realize that you both love brand X of coffee, think that global warming is a terrible problem, and had a ford contour that broke down on you a million times, he knows too much to just want to see you naked. Then he just wants to ask for your number, ugh. Save the lengthy conversations for guys you see a lot, or who you can tell really want to talk and are willing to pay for it.


    Yeah, that is sooo true. Don't talk to them for me than a couple songs, even if the room is very slow.
    CARMEN IS HOTT 4 A BLACK CHICK!!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    Why does he have a headset on his head, like Janet Jackson or some shit?
    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    why does Janet Jackson have a headset on her head?!

  9. #9
    Member
    Joined
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    58
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Quote Originally Posted by Djoser
    If the guy is really enjoying the conversation, you could turn this to your advantage, too, by telling him how unusual it is to be able to relax and enjoy a cool customer for a change--make him feel special--then sigh and say you hate to break off such an interesting conversation, but you have to make X amount of dollars, so you have to get back to work.

    So you are telling him two things--he is fun and different and special (he'll love this!), and that you are at work, and need to get paid. Unless he is deluding himself by thinking he's establishing a romantic relationship, he'll be motivated to pay you for your time, and/or possibly get a dance.

    Won't work with everyone, but it couldn't hurt, and it's a graceful way of excusing yourself, while planting the seed in his mind that he might want to come back (with money), and build the rapport.
    If he's got "game" he will say "Well, I understand you need to make your money. Don't let me stop you." Then he'll do a "takeaway" and ignore her just to see how much she misses the convo. He also won't tip her because that will further cloud the issue. He might even show attention and a few bucks to another dancer to induce jealousy, and he'll leave the club on a high note, returning at his convenience, and stonewall you at first to further test you.

    You dancers need to stop evaluating the men with poor game the same as you do the ones with good game, because if a guy has good game, you won't even recognize it as game, but rather a "great guy."

  10. #10
    God/dess dlabtot's Avatar
    Joined
    Jun 2005
    Location
    in your dreams, in my nightmares
    Posts
    2,085
    Thanks
    59
    Thanked 139 Times in 85 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Quote Originally Posted by CustomerFromHell
    If he's got "game" he will say "Well, I understand you need to make your money. Don't let me stop you." Then he'll do a "takeaway" and ignore her just to see how much she misses the convo. He also won't tip her because that will further cloud the issue. He might even show attention and a few bucks to another dancer to induce jealousy, and he'll leave the club on a high note, returning at his convenience, and stonewall you at first to further test you.

    You dancers need to stop evaluating the men with poor game the same as you do the ones with good game, because if a guy has good game, you won't even recognize it as game, but rather a "great guy."

    LOL, sounds like one of the mystery method guys decided to stick around... Yeah, working folks always think customers who don't pay are 'great'

  11. #11
    Member
    Joined
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    58
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Quote Originally Posted by dlabtot
    LOL, sounds like one of the mystery method guys decided to stick around... Yeah, working folks always think customers who don't pay are 'great'
    I'm not from Mystery's camp, but we all came from the same place years ago. I have my method, he has his, and we all have audiences. He just got famous first (because he was willing to do our industry's "extras" nothing illegal mind you), so he's the brand name you'll relate to. I'm more like the "anti-Mystery," the guy who points out that you are fucking Mystery (he's fucked 20 strippers) and he's not paying you, so why should I?

    So you have Mystery on the one hand telling the cool guys not to tip so they can fuck you, and you have me on the other telling the guys you don't fuck not to tip you because you're fucking someone other than them while they are paying for it.

    Evan_essence said on Mystery's board (where they didn't BAN the thread like they did here with the Game thread) that she was concerned that the other customers would want the same treatment as Mystery and his boys claimed they were getting, and she was right. "Not another dime" embodies that: if Mystery is fucking you and not tipping you, why should I give you a cent? If you call him a liar and say he never fucked a dancer, he'd be happy to show you videos that more or less prove otherwise, as well.

    Not another dime!

  12. #12
    Featured Member Crow's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Down South
    Posts
    1,145
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 10 Times in 8 Posts
    My Mood
    Happy

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Quote Originally Posted by CustomerFromHell
    If he's got "game" he will say "Well, I understand you need to make your money. Don't let me stop you." Then he'll do a "takeaway" and ignore her just to see how much she misses the convo. He also won't tip her because that will further cloud the issue. He might even show attention and a few bucks to another dancer to induce jealousy, and he'll leave the club on a high note, returning at his convenience, and stonewall you at first to further test you.

    You dancers need to stop evaluating the men with poor game the same as you do the ones with good game, because if a guy has good game, you won't even recognize it as game, but rather a "great guy."

    We ( seasoned dancers and ones that know what we are doing ) are not interested in his "game". We are interested in his money. Cash=attention, as in time.
    We are there to make money, not friends.

  13. #13
    Featured Member hot4ablackchick's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2006
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    1,346
    Thanks
    83
    Thanked 265 Times in 150 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Quote Originally Posted by dlabtot
    LOL, sounds like one of the mystery method guys decided to stick around... Yeah, working folks always think customers who don't pay are 'great'

    Right On!!!!!!!! Yeah us seasoned girls do not think guys who let us waste our time talking to them are "great." Those kind of custys may get over on the newbies & non hustling girls, but don't pull the shit with me.
    CARMEN IS HOTT 4 A BLACK CHICK!!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    Why does he have a headset on his head, like Janet Jackson or some shit?
    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    why does Janet Jackson have a headset on her head?!

  14. #14
    Featured Member hot4ablackchick's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2006
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    1,346
    Thanks
    83
    Thanked 265 Times in 150 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    I would not sit with a guy b/c he had good convo. I can have good convo at home with my soon to be hubby. Its nice if a guy has good convo, but I would rather be sitting w/a mute who is paying, than a cheap/broke ass with good convo.
    CARMEN IS HOTT 4 A BLACK CHICK!!!!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by ViolaStrings View Post
    Why does he have a headset on his head, like Janet Jackson or some shit?
    Quote Originally Posted by Emily View Post
    why does Janet Jackson have a headset on her head?!

  15. #15
    God/dess Bridgette's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Gettin the fuck outta Dodge!
    Posts
    14,241
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Ugh. CustomerFromHell is clearly trying to ride the coattails of Mystery to make some money too
    Get the fuck outta here!

    We are just trying to make a damn living like anyone else. Why the fuck can't assholes like this. Just. Fucking. Leave. Us. Alone?!?! If this kind of shit really takes hold, there will soon be no money for strippers because all the guys will be too busy trying to get laid, which means, uh, no more strippers. The girls won't do this for no money. Dumbasses. Then what will your trophy fucks be?

    Quote Originally Posted by pheno View Post
    When you lead a nontraditional life don't try to measure it with traditional milestones.

  16. #16
    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    9,746
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 50 Times in 31 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Hey Lil,
    Take this for what it is worth - I am not a stellar closer. (Actually with sales guys, I just make them feel sorry for me by demonstrating my poor, sucky sales ability. They agree that I would never be able to sell any product that doesn't sell itself, and give me a few pity dances.) Just ask. Easiest thing ever. By the time you've been all captivating and stuff they are either a) going to buy or b) not. If they are already into you, there are no magic words. So the mode of asking is entirely up to you - like you can try being flippant and cute, like "Okay - now that we've gotten politics out of the way/solved all the world's problem, let's go to the back - you can take off my clothes and touch me." Or, not, if that is not your thing. Or, honestly, what I normally do, which is "So, honey, would you like a dance?/would to like to come upstairs/downstairs/to the back with me?/Are you interested in a lapdance tonight?" This is imperfect for some girls, because it gives the guy a really easy way to say "no". Phrase it as affirmatively as you want. It's easy, and like I said - generally by the time you've had enthusiastic conversation they are into it or not, and HOW you ask isn't going to make or break you.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

  17. #17
    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
    Joined
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    9,746
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 50 Times in 31 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridgette
    We are just trying to make a damn living like anyone else. Why the fuck can't assholes like this. Just. Fucking. Leave. Us. Alone?!?! If this kind of shit really takes hold, there will soon be no money for strippers because all the guys will be too busy trying to get laid, which means, uh, no more strippers. The girls won't do this for no money. Dumbasses. Then what will your trophy fucks be?
    It's not going to take hold, because it is stupid. We all know damn well that a) fucking a stripper is not the accomplishment these people are making it out to be and that b) guys do NOT become attractive or more fuckable because they don't spend money and c) that any guy can find a stripper to fuck, because not all strippers are gorgeous, brilliant sexpots with their choices of hollywood celebrities (yes, Bridg - I'm looking at you.) Some of them are just normal girls, and others have options that are severely limited on the "dating market." Seriously - out of all the girls who have dated customers: how many start dating guys after they a) refuse to buy a dance/drink b) refuse to tip c) use the line "Well, don't let me stop you from making money" (that one has been around for at least 10 years btw) d) then spend money on other girls. Is there any girl (with options) who finds this attractive, let alone irresistable? I have never dated a guy who acts discourteously in the club, or who acts like I am there to socialize, or like he is somehow above the environment he is in. Once I was wildly attracted to a guy who did whole "make me work for it" thing, but he still definitely spent money. Trust me custies - being cheap/rejecting girls will not make you more attractive. This is not hype.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

  18. #18
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    200
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    I understand the need to affirm ones intelligence, espeicially while wearing lingerie and flirtiing. I too, often have way too long conversations and get little in return. I wish that it was all simplier! This thread is great.

  19. #19
    Veteran Member Jenna78's Avatar
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Illinois
    Posts
    734
    Thanks
    2
    Thanked 28 Times in 22 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    I have to disagree with Crow about buying drinks. I have tons of guys offer me drinks, waste my time while the slow waitress get the drinks and then think they have bought my time with a drink. So much so that I do not let guys buy me drinks unless I am really thirsty (i don't drink alcohol) or if I know them and know they will buy dances or they already have spent some $. Often I will approach guys who don't even have their own drink, don't offer to buy me one, but still get dances from me.

    I had the same problem of too much talking when I first started. Just don't talk so much--I give 1 song, 2 if its slow. At the first quiet break--when you both pause just ask. I talked too much at first because i was afraid to be rejected and wanted to put off asking. Then I just started doing it. Trust me, talking to someone for 20 min vs 2 minutes is (in most cases) not going to change what they will spend on you.

  20. #20
    Featured Member red red red's Avatar
    Joined
    Mar 2005
    Location
    Philadelphia
    Posts
    923
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 3 Times in 3 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    I find the drink offer is usually pre-emptive to money being spent. It's not necessarily surefire, but a guy who offers you a drink usually does so because he's interested in getting to know you for a bit before he spends. Some guys buy drinks and don't spend, but it's usually easy to spot them--they're often younger guys who have mistaken the club for a regular bar. Also, make sure the guy is not sitting in front of half a dozen unfinished stripper cocktails... that's a drink daddy, and while they're nice, they're a waste of time... as the unfinished drinks in front of them can attest to.

    As for the rest of it, LOL... I hope the guys that I talk to for ten minutes who then tell me not to let them keep me from making money go home like, "I have planted the seed. It's only a matter of time. She thinks I'm a great guy!" Then come back later in the week, pay every last dime of the cover charge and the cost of an overpriced drink, sit there for an hour, and wait for me to remember them... that's a lot more likely than the scenario in which this maneuver sweeps me off my feet.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  21. #21
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    Jun 2006
    Posts
    575
    Thanks
    20
    Thanked 176 Times in 70 Posts

    Default Re: Good convo and NO sale

    On a slow shift, I'll accept a drink or two, but on a busy night, I barely drink at all. The time I spend drinking a drink is time I could be dancing. I sometimes wonder how girls who drank 5 long islands had much time to dance. If a guy is paying for your time rather than dances, that's a little different, then I'll drink.

Similar Threads

  1. what is your regular customer convo???
    By babybambi08 in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 07-18-2009, 11:11 AM
  2. 2 kittys having a convo
    By partygurlEmma in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-28-2008, 04:58 AM
  3. Convo before lapdance
    By kaiarose in forum Stripping (was Stripping General)
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 12-22-2006, 11:41 PM
  4. My Convo With A My Space Constituent.
    By onlythebest in forum The Lounge
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 06-06-2005, 01:44 PM
  5. Continuing the convo...
    By DSUsb19 in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 11-16-2004, 09:46 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •