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Thread: Why Do People Do This???

  1. #1
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    Default Why Do People Do This???

    ok, when you date someone casually to get to know them, is 7 weeks enough time to make a decision as to whether or not you want to be with them? and is it uncommon for one person to want it and not the other?? in that situation, is it fair for the one who doesnt want it to give it more time??? why would someone be so hurtful to another person by dating them casually and then decide not to be with them??

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    I think when you date someone "casually," you make no guarantees about whether or not it will develop into true love or a serious relationship or really anything beyond casual dating. Isn't that kind of the whole point of "dating casually"?
    "Doc still loved true things, but he knew it was not a general love and it could be a very dangerous mistress." - John Steinbeck, Cannery Row


    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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    Member toplessnewb's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    He dumped you, hun. It happens. Get a carton of Hagen Daz and get stoned.

  4. #4
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    It sounds like he might have led you on...is that how you feel? People say they want the truth but sometimes both parties in a relationship are a little bit dishonest until they get what they want out of eachother.
    If he burned you, get your "pound of flesh".....this is why I don't date anymore, I feel like men are wasting my time.

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    yes, there is sex involved. and yes, i meant that the person who doesnt want the relationship....that is what i mean by be with them.

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    yes, of course you know that it isnt a guarantee, but doesnt it hurt the person who wants a relationship? is 7 weeks long enough to get to know them before making a decision? that seems short..

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    he told me we were friends. he said that we werent a couple, that he wasnt my boyfriend. is there a difference between 'casual' and "exclusive".......there was never any spoken agreement of commiting to each other. when we went out one time, he introduced me as his friend.

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    Moderator Djoser's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    Start dating other people immediately. If he really likes you, he'll realize he could lose you to someone who'll treat you better.

    Then you can decide if you still want to date him...

    If he doesn't care, then fuck him--or rather, don't fuck him, lol.
    You must have chaos within you to give birth to a dancing star.
    Friedrich Nietzsche

    Free your mind, and your ass will follow.
    George Clinton

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  9. #9
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    Oh chastity, don't give him any more sex. Women make such big mistakes when they start feeling for men. Trade up, girl, up.

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    how many Warren Beatty's are out there? you know his past until he met Annette Bening? that is what i want....to be the next Annette Bening....truth is....i hate men that are nice.....i dont want a one woman man........i have turned down men who would treat me good......im attracted to the type of guy who will never be with one forever.......

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    i dont want anyone else.....i dont use people just to get back at someone....

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    Veteran Member Sinful333's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    He doesnt want to be with you or he would be. He doesnt want you to be his girlfriend... find someone else.

    It will stop hurting sooner if you just move on.

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    i wont be with anyone then...i would be happier alone that with someone else....i ratted him out and i dont regret it....i have called his girlfriends cunts to his face, and he NEVER defended them!!!! could i get him to reconsider??

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    Featured Member kandie_kitten's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    ...no. you cant. this guy is using and abusing you...but you're letting him.

    You calling his girls cunts and him not defending is not a sign he can change...its a sign he treats all women like crap. At least you're one of many.

    Move on honey, this guy isnt worth it

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    i must point out, when i called them cunts, it was AFTER he broke up with them...not during the relationship.....i dont like nice men.....i am attracted to the Charlie Sheen/Russell Crowe types.....i am happier by myself than with someone else.....also, i have to say, if i like someone i am an obsessive caller....i call them obsessively and i did that with him. twice a day. instead of once in awhile...is that overbearing??

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    you can call me psycho....but i hate nice men such as teachers, or those who work in those 'helping people' like professions......i dont find them appealing.....i always like the ones who arent 'one woman' types.......

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    Featured Member kandie_kitten's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    ...yes, that's overbearing..and if thats what you're after...thend otn be surprised when you get hurt...you go for men who hurt women...so I kind of lack sympathy...best of lcukt o you

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    Featured Member Paintbaby's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    Well, you got the expected result. Date shit, get shit in return. Are you really so surprised?

    He is being who he is, and he has been consistant with being a total turd. He isn't going to change that for you, and your love isn't going to fix him. Nor is he going to suddenly realize how much he cares about you and start treating you right, because, clearly, he doesn't. Stay away.

    In the meantime, you may want to take a look at your own motivations, and why you seem to think you deserve to be treated like garbage, and look down your nose at men who could treat you with real love and respect. If I were you, I'd be more concerned about that, than whether some useless dude is going to come around.

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    Featured Member kandie_kitten's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    ^^^^said with so much more eloquence and patience than I had

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    i was mistaken about russell crowe....he treats his wife very well. and with charlie sheen....well we all know who was the turd was in that picture, dont we??

    are you saying that someone who hasnt been with the same woman for more than 2 years is turd?? if someone is in their mid 40s and still isnt married does that mean that they arent a one woman man?? ever hear of open relationship? where its agreed that you can see other people? are you saying men like this dont change....and by the way.....his last girlfriend dumped him after 2 years......

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    Veteran Member Obenta's Avatar
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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    Am I the only one having trouble following all of this? It's like drunk posting.

    Are you asking for advice or just ranting or what?

    If he calls you a friend, he doesn't want to be romantically involved with you. It may suck for you. Just go on with your life.

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    If you were so okay with an "open relationship", you'd hardly be calling his ex-girlfriends "cunts", now would you? And yes, a man who is in his 40's and can't seem to sustain a long-term relationship with a woman does have a few issues---you can mask that with the term "open relationship" if you choose.

    Wake-up and smell the break-up.

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    You should hook up with that dude Smith. You two can feel the need... the need for need. His bullet points are reckless and impusive. Very hot.

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    i think you got to wraped up to quikly. I think you should eat some icecream and watch a life time moive and move the the hell on. If you don't feel better in about 3 weeks myabe you should seek theropy.

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    Default Re: Why Do People Do This???

    ok, the original question was about casual dating. i have been told and i think someone said this that when you date casually, there is no guarantee of a relationship. is it like a series of auditions or interviews? you are being considered for a relationship, its not the done deal. do you commit to someone right away, or do you date casually just to get to know them. the question was, when you have dated someone casually and have gotten to know them, why would you decide not to be with them. i want to be alone. im happier that way. im going to hurt loving men the same way.

    i am clueless about life, but im not a troll....im clueless about dating and relationships, i thought you commited right away.....i didnt know you saw each other casually first just to get to know them. and yes, i thought it was the done deal when it wasnt....

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