Note: I need guy's opinions especially, and girls... how long you make a guy wait.
okay, so I just got out of a situation where I guy became an asshole because I slept with him on the first date. He tried to turn it around on me and say that he would never date a girl who'd slept with him on the first or second day, yet he was the one pushing for sex. I wasn't planning on sleeping with him on the first date, but I also didn't figure this was going to be that big of a deal. I've never before slept with an asshole-love-'em-and-leave-'em type who then tries to pin negative characteristics on me because I was okay with sleeping with him.
Question: If this happens again with some guy, where I really like him, should I play the game (that I hate) or do I sleep with him when I feel the chemistry is right for both of us (and risk alienating a guy.) It's fine if I alienate an asshole, it sucks, but there it is. But I would hate to think that the guys who may be perfect for the rest of the relationship would become an asshole because of the sex on the first (or second) date.
Now, I hate arbitrary "you can't sleep with the guy until x date" only because I feel that if you like him, and he likes you, and the chemistry happens, then you have sex when you have sex. I understand the logic behind sexual tension, and yet sometimes I just don't have the patience for it if I really like the guy.
I don't want to not learn my lesson if this is something that I really do need to not lose a guy that I like. But I also have a hard time with the idea that most guys would turn out to be assholes if I slept with them on the first date. I don't want to date an a guy who thinks like that, but then I also don't want to miss out on a really great guy because I didn't wait til the third date.
I hate the double standard, and I hate the fact that having a really great sexual encounter with a person wants to make me know them more, not less, and yet for guys, it seem to work quite the opposite.



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), but there was LOTS of chemistry the first time we met. Yeah, I felt like it was a risk worth taking. If it worked great, if it didn't then next.



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