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Thread: I'll be in love with a stripper...

  1. #1
    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Yes! my boyfriend has finnaly accepted the fact that i want to be a stripper.

    I just explained to him that i wasnt doing it to "find someone new" or because i didnt love him. i told him i was mostly doing it for the money, and for the scheduling freedom, and it sure as hell beats the ordinary retai/foodl minium wage job with a perfectionist boss hovering over your shoulder. i told him the possiabilties that i could make a 2 week check worth in one night.
    i also told him im doing it until i get out of college and start my "real" career. and to be more financaily independent and save my money. told him i would work in a non-contact club.
    and not to mention, i described the bonus of dancing, and dressing in the cutest clothes and heels and not ALL of the dancers are just crack-whores(i know so because of the gals from this forum! so not true)

    i told him, you know, i know its not ALL glamour(from what i hear) but im ready to deal with the ups and downs. (theres ups and downs for everything in life, anyways!)

    "Wow, ill be in love with a stripper!" he told me.

    it takes a strong,understanding secure man to be in love with a stripper.

    I think boyfriends just have a really bad idea on stripping. they dont know much about it, and probably base their assumptions of the less-than-classy clubs they visited with their buds.

    im still a little nervous on whats going to happen when i really do start to strip.

    but, how many of you had to explain/convince yer b.f or husband to UNDERSTAND? what did he say?
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    God/dess NinaDaisy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Did he actually say "Wow, I'll be in love with a stripper."? You've got to be kidding me.

    Run away from that douche as fast as you can. The fact that he's already fetishizing the stripping means that he'll have major issues when you start.
    "She has written so well, and marvellously well, that I was completely ashamed of myself as a writer...But this girl, who is to my knowledge very unpleasant and we might even say a high-grade bitch, can write rings around all of us who consider ourselves as writers"

    Ernest Hemingway on writer, aviation pioneer and horse trainer Beryl Markham


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    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    ^ What Nina said. Suddenly he's in love with a stripper, not in love with Windy.


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    God/dess NinaDaisy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Are there any low-contact places in Hawaii even? I thought Hawaii clubs were pretty high-contact.
    "She has written so well, and marvellously well, that I was completely ashamed of myself as a writer...But this girl, who is to my knowledge very unpleasant and we might even say a high-grade bitch, can write rings around all of us who consider ourselves as writers"

    Ernest Hemingway on writer, aviation pioneer and horse trainer Beryl Markham


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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    My opinion but I think he was probably just making a joke that sounded wrong. Don't kick him out yet, to me I think it was just one of those dumb man things to say, he was probably trying to sound funny when it really wasn't.

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    Veteran Member bella du jour's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    I think it's an understandable thing to say, people always say the silliest things (that they would not want repeated!) to their SO, things they assume will be taken in the right spirit.

    I think most men secretly like the idea of going out with a stripper, but know that the idea is something to reserve for fantasy, not reality (because part of the appeal of a stripper is that she is not a "real" person the way a GF or a wife is, she's an idealized woman). The fact that you already have a loving relationship with the man (one that's based on tangible qualities you admire in each other, and not just fantasies) means that he never intended to fall in love with a "stripper" (what-ever a stripper is to him)... but now he gets to bring a little bit of that fantasy into real life ...and once he gets over his fears an accepts your decision, he can feel free to enjoy this new and exciting dream-come-true! I don't see any harm in that Fantasy can really spice up a long term relationship!

    Bella




    All about my boobs...

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    Featured Member Miss_Luscious's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Has no one else heard that Song "I'm in Love with a Stripper"? I think he was making a reference to that. I don't see why the PPs are saying dump him...that seems alittle extreme to me.
    "A stupid man's report of what a clever man says is never accurate because he unconsciously translates what he hears into something he can understand." - Bertrand Russell

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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Count me among those who'll give him the benefit of the doubt that he was saying that tongue-in-cheek.
    "Before I conceived you, I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour, I would die for you. This is the miracle of life." -- Maureen Hawkins

    "I just can't get over how much babies cry. I really had no idea what I was getting into. To tell you the truth, I thought it would be more like getting a cat." -- Anne Lamott

  9. #9
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Me too. My boyfriend has made that joke before... it's just being cute.

    BTW, Windy, this is going to sound crazy, but were you in Los Angeles this past week? I was working the other night and a girl who looked remarkably like you was sitting at the tiprail when I was dancing onstage. I thought she was hot so I asked her name, and she told me it was Wendy (or Windy?). Was that you or just a weird coincidence?

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    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah
    Me too. My boyfriend has made that joke before... it's just being cute.

    BTW, Windy, this is going to sound crazy, but were you in Los Angeles this past week? I was working the other night and a girl who looked remarkably like you was sitting at the tiprail when I was dancing onstage. I thought she was hot so I asked her name, and she told me it was Wendy (or Windy?). Was that you or just a weird coincidence?
    hehe ya i was in L.A. unfortunely, i didnt get a chance 2 visit any strip clubs!
    what a weird concindence!!! where do u work at anyways? im still in l.a, maybe i can go visit u(if i can get away frorm my family..god! lol)

    yeah he was just "joking around". he actualy really didnt like the idea of me being a stripper at first(a little insecure..all his past g/fs cheated on him) but i think i just had to explain the whole thing. hes a bit nervous bout other random guys seeing my "treasures"(if you will..)

    and im not gonna strip in hawaii..you have to be 21 anyways....just gonna start off as a waitress first, then when i move to another state, then i will begin

    by the way Yekhafah, did i ever tell u how awesome and sweet, positive and encourging i think you are?
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    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Quote Originally Posted by bella du jour
    I think it's an understandable thing to say, people always say the silliest things (that they would not want repeated!) to their SO, things they assume will be taken in the right spirit.

    I think most men secretly like the idea of going out with a stripper, but know that the idea is something to reserve for fantasy, not reality (because part of the appeal of a stripper is that she is not a "real" person the way a GF or a wife is, she's an idealized woman). The fact that you already have a loving relationship with the man (one that's based on tangible qualities you admire in each other, and not just fantasies) means that he never intended to fall in love with a "stripper" (what-ever a stripper is to him)... but now he gets to bring a little bit of that fantasy into real life ...and once he gets over his fears an accepts your decision, he can feel free to enjoy this new and exciting dream-come-true! I don't see any harm in that Fantasy can really spice up a long term relationship!

    Bella
    very well said
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  12. #12
    Yekhefah
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Aw, thanks! I dance at the Seventh Veil in Hollywood. And yeah, that was one bizarre coincidence, especially given the name similarity and her resemblance to you... she was a little heavier I think, but still hot, and she even had the same little mark on her lip. You have a doppelganger out there!

    If you drop by the Seventh Veil, say hi! My stage name is Lily.

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    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Quote Originally Posted by Yekhefah
    Aw, thanks! I dance at the Seventh Veil in Hollywood. And yeah, that was one bizarre coincidence, especially given the name similarity and her resemblance to you... she was a little heavier I think, but still hot, and she even had the same little mark on her lip. You have a doppelganger out there!

    If you drop by the Seventh Veil, say hi! My stage name is Lily.
    omg i walked by that place once....its like on sunset, yea?? omg i cant beielve the resemblance!

    i definely say hii if i get a chance. by the way lily is a really cute name!
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    Veteran Member KennedyWinters's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    My boyfriend met me when I was taking a break from dancing to have boobie-surgery. So he knew I would spend alot of time dancing but I had only been going 2 days a week before so it wasn't like a major deal. Yeah my stripper-gear was strewn about my living room but he was very much not turned on by the fact. Even though he loves porn- he never acted juvenile when he found me making breakfast in heels or trying to decide on which g-string to bring. Maybe it is self-control maybe he is just a genuine guy though. I'd like to think the latter. Wehn we make love, talk, hang out, go anywhere- it's just about me and him, our dreams for success, our tribulations with life. The fact that I sometimes take my clothes off and grind on strangers for money somehow doesn't phase him. His last GF was afraid to take her clothes off in the lgiht with him and laid stiff as a board during sex. So I'm quite a breath of fresh air and I guess he just doesn't have any judgements about wild women quite yet. I say "yet" because who knows what could happen. He may yearn for the stay-at-home girl sometime in the future and if thats the case...well I hope he's sold some screenplays and I can be that for him.

  15. #15
    Jordan.
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    Post Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Quote Originally Posted by Windy
    but, how many of you had to explain/convince yer b.f or husband to UNDERSTAND? what did he say?
    Congrats on telling your man!

    Well, I haven't told mine yet. I wont until I actually start dancing, then I'll tell him. But gah, I already know he's not going to like it! I can just picture it now, he's going to tell me no, and that I dont have to do it, and he can take care of me, ect. But like you said, it's about financial freedom and independence. I think, I hope he'll come to terms with it and be understanding/accepting in time though *crosses fingers*

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    Featured Member Windy's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    Quote Originally Posted by Jordan.
    Congrats on telling your man!

    Well, I haven't told mine yet. I wont until I actually start dancing, then I'll tell him. But gah, I already know he's not going to like it! I can just picture it now, he's going to tell me no, and that I dont have to do it, and he can take care of me, ect. But like you said, it's about financial freedom and independence. I think, I hope he'll come to terms with it and be understanding/accepting in time though *crosses fingers*
    hehe. i know, my b/f was all "ill take care of you, u dont HAVE to do it." haha. but u shud jus explain it so he'd understand. i just act like "if u cant accept it, then ill be on my own" - that usually catches his attention. i guess yer sort of in my situation! lol. but shit, its like, do u really wanna work for minium wage? that BLOWS! we know better i think if yer really smart...u can make money off yer brain AND yer looks, ya know???? looks are a good given gift!!!
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    Featured Member GnBeret's Avatar
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    For now, give him the benefit of the doubt and wait and see. While many, and maybe even most guy have one variation or another of some kind of problem with their SO being a dancer (or, more commonly, with their SO becoming and/or continuing to be a dancer once they've become seriously involved with them), there actually are some guys out there that are neither bothered by it nor playing pretend with themselves 'cause they're living out some male fantasy - and he may be one of them.
    "That's your answer Old Man? I guess you're a Hard Case too...."
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    it's that you can always see it coming, but you can never stop it.
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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    I know im going through the same thing with my man. And some of the girls on here warned me that most guys are okay with it at first and then when you actually start doing it the jealousy sets in, (i know that not for all guys but most of them) He tells me that he is only concerned because he really cares about me and loves me, wants to spend the rest of his life with me etc. etc. So it does kinda spice things up a little, but it takes alot of reasurring and showing them that you really do love them to keep them from flippin out. He said to me the other day" you dont think that you can fall in love with someone else in a place like that, with all them men that you talk to and get naked for" and my heart really went out to him because i can see why he would be thinking like that a bit, its only normal human insecurity. I then simply replied" no, because i only talk long enough with them to see if they are gonna spend some money on me and its on to the next customer. Also that most of them are old, fat, weird, and the young guys that come in rarely ever buy dances there just there to drink and watch the stage, so i rarely approach them." (unless i see that they have been buying from the other girls)

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    Default Re: I'll be in love with a stripper...

    I always tell guys that I'm a dancer right away and I ADD, "If you have any problem with my job...DO NOT ask me out again." And I never hear another peep about it.
    My current boyfriend of 16 mo. (who I met at my club) jokes about my dancing all the time. His favorite is rubbing in the fact that he never ever gets the stripper me at home. I feel bad for him sometimes..hehe. He even got upset when I talked about quitting. He whined, "If you quit you won't be able to make your own schedule anymore." He has a jacked up military schedule and I always take off when he's off.
    If your man shows any sign of having a problem with it...it's not going to get better. You will have to choose between him and the job. This doesn't make him a bad person. Hell, I felt a little jealous of my man bouncing at a western bar here...in his cute cowboy hat and his big jamie foxx booty. I was so glad when he had to quit b/c of schedule conflicts.

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