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Thread: Is it really all that worth it?

  1. #1
    Member pinkispimp's Avatar
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    Default Is it really all that worth it?

    I was just wondering.. you girls ever just get depressed.. Lately.. I've been doing absolutely nothing.. i don't see the point of going to work.. and making money coming back home and doing nothing.. I have everything i need and want.. I am sooo BORED of shopping bored of everything that has anything to do with money .. I'm not sick of dancing not at all, that's what keeps me going and the money in my hands.. but its when i get home i feel so sick of everything..

    In general I'm just BORED with everything.. lucky for me my boredom.. has fucked up everything else but my job.. i still make bank when i work... but i feel I'm doing this for nothing all that money for nothing.. i like the money always makes me feel good and i have that little high when I'm holding it at the end of the night but all that work and money for what? I think i might be depressed ... when I'm at the club i put on an act so everything is fine but when i get home i feel bored ...

    I just moved to this city about a year ago.. and all i do is work.. i have no friends and its killing me..i can't meet a guy, i try to make friends with the other strippers at my club but i feel they hate me because I'm make a lot of money.. well most of it anyway.. none of them talk to me ... they always make a big group all talking and laughing and I'm always on the outside, I hate it. Since i can't talk to them well i work work work..

    I just want to talk to someone anyone.. .. I feel so alone..

    whats the big apt, expensive furniture, car.. TV.. everything for .. it really doesn't mean so much to me anymore..

  2. #2
    Senior Member terra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    Actually I think I sort of know how you feel... -_-

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    Member NewGirl9's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    I feel exactly that way. I'm stuck in a lease for a beautiful apartment and a car that would be way beyond my means if I were going to school and holding down a "normal" job... I have countless pairs of designer sunglasses and more pairs of jeans from Nordstrom than I'll ever actually wear. I've actually laughed on the inside when people gripe about gas prices because, well.. that really hasn't been an issue for me.

    But beyond all the time relaxing by my luxurious pool and carousing Niemanns, I feel terribly empty. I've become lazy. I'm "peopled out" a lot. I have zero friends, and have major issues finding a man.

    Most times I really wish I could go back to being a broke college kid living off Ramen and Keystone Light.

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    God/dess Polekitten's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    It sounds like you might be showing early signs of depression. I cant be sure but my mum suffered for years and still suffers from depression and I can heard worrying warning signals in what you have written. Dont panic though, all you need to do and take a step back and reasess your situation. You say its not work thats making you feel this way, thats great but what is it then?? I have a feeling that it might be loneliness, also, do you have any trouble sleeping, do you or have you had any problems with alcohol or substance abuse as this could be a major factor.
    You say you dont care about having lots of money or a big apt but what do you care about?? Maybe you need to cut down the time you spend working and think about what you really want from life and then GO FOR IT!
    If you cant find friends through work then find some other way to meet people, join a gym or take a class that youve always wanted to do. Take a vacation alone and challenge yourself, these are all great ways of meeting people that have similar interests to you. Dont feel bad about not making friends at work, I personally actively avoid making friends with strippers as many of them seem quite unstable anyway.
    Pm me if you feel like a chat honey. We all go through bad times, remember, "This too will pass."



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    God/dess GoldCoastGirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    Do you have a financial plan? Are you investing your money? If you are bored, increase your financial literacy through applied and read knowledge. Read books, listen to CDs, invest the money yourself... "play the stock market" as such.

    Have you thought about volunteer-ing somewhere? That will get you out and about amongst people that aren't in the adult entertainment industry.

    Goodness, I only WISH to be in your position. I'm still working on getting there!


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  6. #6
    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    Yeah, I wish I was sick of money.
    I have taught that the sky in all its zones is mortal and its substance was formed by a process of birth

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    God/dess Emily's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    I think that's the problem with acquiring "stuff" to make you happy.

    Do you ever travel? Do you ever donate to charity? This may give you a sense of purpose with your money, because when you are laying on your deathbed (I do this exercise a lot), what will you have wished you had done more of? Once you find out where you want to go, then you can find a way to get there.

    I found the book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People very good for this type of thinking.

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    Featured Member hot4ablackchick's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    You could give all your money to me. I will put it to good use for you. Naw, just kidding. I went through a period where I did not care about going to work. I always NEED to go to work however. I have 2 little ones to take care of, so I could always use money. I am just getting out of that period. Try to find a hobby. Start saving for vacation, future kids, or future kids college funds, if you even want any kids. How often are you working??? Maybe you could cut back a little if you are working a lot and still making good money. Are you saving for retirement??? Sometimes I just don't feel "usefu.l" I have no friends and do not associate with anyone, thats also a part of my problem at least. Try to make some friends if you don't have any.
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  9. #9
    PhillyDancer1982
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    I can relate! I've been feeling the same way lately...up until a few months ago, I had no life. I would be so tired from dancing, that I didn't feel like doing anything but sleeping or browsing the net when I got home. It actually was part of what ruined my relationship with my ex-boyfriend, because he'd complain in his bitchy way that I was "boring" or never around or never wanted to go out and do stuff. But why would I want to go out to a bar and drink, when I'd spend almost every waking moment doing that at work? I missed out on seeing a lot of my friends to the point that they assumed I wasn't their friend anymore. It totally sucked. But for me though, I couldn't afford to take off because I'd never been able to find a "real job" that paid enough to afford ANY type/shape/form of apartment or car payments, let alone the big car payments I have on my Mustang. And then when I started work in AC...long overnight shifts, with a 3-4hr round-trip commute...made me even more tired, listless, bored, and unable to meet up with friends.

    In the last 2 months or so, I've been trying to hang out more with my friends a little more and I love it! I've realized a few things...that I'd been a workaholic for a temporary "stepping stone/transitional" job. I realized that I wasn't having any fun, so the fact that I'm always tired from driving 160miles round-trip to AC & back has motivated me to look harder for a regular job that requires my Bachelor's degree. After all, I need to keep remembering that I danced to get through college, however I did NOT go to college to become a dancer. I agree with the girl who said that you might be showing early symptoms of depression. I feel like that's what dancing has been doing to me lately. I also realize that the whiny ex-boyfriend who would complain that I was "boring" and "never wanted to do anything" probably had depression as well, otherwise he'd suggest things to do and be more of a self-starter for his own fun. Maybe you should take a small break from dancing...sounds like you're financially stable enough to for a short while. Maybe you could also reduce the number of shifts you work, and devote at least 1-2 days/week to socializing or joining an activity you like?

  10. #10
    Member pinkispimp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Polekitten
    It sounds like you might be showing early signs of depression. I cant be sure but my mum suffered for years and still suffers from depression and I can heard worrying warning signals in what you have written. Dont panic though, all you need to do and take a step back and reasess your situation. You say its not work thats making you feel this way, thats great but what is it then?? I have a feeling that it might be loneliness, also, do you have any trouble sleeping, do you or have you had any problems with alcohol or substance abuse as this could be a major factor.
    You say you dont care about having lots of money or a big apt but what do you care about?? Maybe you need to cut down the time you spend working and think about what you really want from life and then GO FOR IT!
    If you cant find friends through work then find some other way to meet people, join a gym or take a class that youve always wanted to do. Take a vacation alone and challenge yourself, these are all great ways of meeting people that have similar interests to you. Dont feel bad about not making friends at work, I personally actively avoid making friends with strippers as many of them seem quite unstable anyway.
    Pm me if you feel like a chat honey. We all go through bad times, remember, "This too will pass."

    i think i might be depressed and no I don't sleep very well.. unless i dance then come home tired... if I don't work.. and just stay home and do nothing all day.. at night i have nightmares.. and I'll wake up go sleep on my couch.. then i wake up i have another nightmare and i go back to my bed.. i don't know why i change spots.. but i do it at least 2-3 times a night..
    I don't drink, or do drugs.. thank god.. or thing would probably worst... but I'm sooo tempted
    I took entire week off and the only thing i could think of is going back to work... i can't think of anything i want to do.. everything seems so blah..

  11. #11
    Member pinkispimp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    Quote Originally Posted by GoldCoastGirl
    Do you have a financial plan? Are you investing your money? If you are bored, increase your financial literacy through applied and read knowledge. Read books, listen to CDs, invest the money yourself... "play the stock market" as such.

    Have you thought about volunteer-ing somewhere? That will get you out and about amongst people that aren't in the adult entertainment industry.

    Goodness, I only WISH to be in your position. I'm still working on getting there!
    nope my money is just sitting on its fat ass doing nothing. I should try it thanx

  12. #12
    Member pinkispimp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Emily
    I think that's the problem with acquiring "stuff" to make you happy.

    Do you ever travel? Do you ever donate to charity? This may give you a sense of purpose with your money, because when you are laying on your deathbed (I do this exercise a lot), what will you have wished you had done more of? Once you find out where you want to go, then you can find a way to get there.

    I found the book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People very good for this type of thinking.
    i have travelled a few times but i did it alone.. and I'm so sick of travelling alone..
    I've never donated to a charity, I would do it.. but i still think it wouldn't change the way i feel

  13. #13
    Member pinkispimp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    [QUOTE=hot4ablackchick]
    I work about 4-5 days a week.. and i do doubles every time.. or at least 4 times a week.. I'll start from 12pm and finish around 12-1 am I do have the energy for that whenever i feel myself going tired i just take a coffee pill... sort of like a wake up but its LEGAL... and its not addictive..

    I dont have kids and i dont think i'll have some anytime soon..

  14. #14
    Member pinkispimp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    [QUOTE=PhillyDancer1982]

    that's EXACTLY what i do.. stay on the computer all day and have the tv on and go from on to the other.. that is my entire day! when i'm not working or when I'm done working


    thanx to all of you who replied muah!

    I think i might take an go see my doctor.. maybe he'll be able to help..

  15. #15
    God/dess KamrynAnne's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    i can't belive you work from 12 pm until 1 am.. thats insane... why don't you cut back a little bit..... that might help.. it sounds like you need a solid core group of friends.... Its often hard to make really good trustworthy friends.. belive me, I've gone through friends like its my job.... good luck and hang in there..

  16. #16
    Miss. Kristina Lee
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    yeah if i worked thst much i would be depressed too! lordy!

  17. #17
    Member pinkispimp's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Miss. Kristina Lee
    yeah if i worked thst much i would be depressed too! lordy!
    i dont feel i'm working to much.. because I have nothing else to do.. i take a week off every month and its always the most boring week ever.. if i had something to do other then work i wouldnt work doubles

  18. #18
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    A lack of interests in things that you normally like is one of the first signs of depression. Though it seems that aside from shopping you didn't have other interests? Step back a bit and figure out what you like to do: read, be active outside, arts and crafts, plays. Maybe set up one thing to do a day that's new and make yourself do it. See what seems to interest you the most. I think seeing a doctor could be a good idea, but keep in mind that antidepressents are supposed to work if you have a chemical imbalance. It seems to me that this might not be the issue here, but what is going on in your life right now.

    I feel for you. I've battled with depression for years.

  19. #19
    Featured Member london's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    Sounds like you like staying active so why not join a sports club or dance class? Film club? And you don't have to commit to any one thing. Just go to a session or two of a few different activities (look through your city paper or tourist paper:yes, play the tourist, it can actually be fun!) and when you stop liking one thing, go to the next. Eventually you'll find an activity that you really like and will stick to it and it will become as routine as going to work. I have gone through this as well and a few things which have helped have been :going to the movies/theatre/museum alone (there, you can be alone and zone out and be entertained at the same time); going out to eat alone (this was very intimidating for me because I was afraid of being hit on or stared at and although true to a slight degree, I also made friends with the hosts/waiters and they always bend over backwards for me now; pamper yourself: schedule an appointment to go to a salon/day spa/dentist/nutritionist whatever and really enjoy the fact that you are paid to maintain this image....pampering to me is so much fun and a necessary indulgence for us dancers who give so much of our time, attention, etc that sometimes it's great to be spoiled as well as well as tip the attendants well! Take a business/language/financial literacy/real estate or some fun class that you think would be interesting to take at the local CC. Lastly, perhaps get a pet...this is what I plan to do in the near future!!!
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  20. #20
    Miss. Kristina Lee
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    have you considered going to school?

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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    I know how you feel, I'v been there a few times. I went from a starving student barely scraping by, like I could either pay my electric bill or eat, not both, to making more than both my parents have ever made. It's a strange adjustment for sure. When Ive told any close friends how I feel they do say it's possibly a sign of depression. I felt guilty for making all that money that I would save it all except for buying necessary items. Then I started feeling like there was no point in working since I have everything I used to dream about when I was broke. My suggestion would be to see it as saving for a house or something big like that for your future. I also learned to not feel guilty to spoil myself every one in a while. Also, just getting out and doing something when you have time of helps.

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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    It somewhat sounds like you don't have any social and business life with people of your financial means. That creates loneliness.

    In other words, having some acquaintances who have above average incomes from dancing or other NON rat race type jobs, who are actually involved in trying to start other businesses and achieve wealth, is important.

    Your friends obviously don't have the money you have and can't afford the things you have, and that is leaving you lonely.

    Dancing should be about trying to acquire seed money to create wealth in order to NEVER have to work a traditional job again. If you look at this business that way, and surround yourself with other girls ( 1 or 2 is fine) who see dancing that way, you'll have several like minded friends who can afford the lifestyle you have, and who are also working to achieve financial security through this business.

    You never can have too much money. Once you use some of your resources to achieve wealth that will eventually replace dacing at some point in your life, I bet you will feel better.

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    God/dess fancygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    1.) volunteer at an animal shelter, a children's hospital, or something that you really believe in, like an environment group. You'll make friends, and the first step to starting to feel better about life is to start seeing how shitty other people's lives are.
    2.) Socialize online through myspace, match, lavalife, et.al. to start feeling out people who you might be interested in meeting.
    3.) Definitely save, and invest if you can. If you like investing, turn it into a hobby where you go to seminars and meet other people. Also, perhaps when you quit dancing, you might be able to turn this hobby into a career.
    4.) If you have family, lean on them-- vacation with them, talk or email with them more often. If there's troubles with them and the troubles are relatively minor (i.e. not a danger to your health or sanity) try to patch things up with them.
    5.) join the community college and do classes that interest you without a longer term goal. Take pottery, physics, or even piloting classes. You could even learn a new skill like lifeguarding, EMT-ing, or become a TA.

    Ask yourself: what would you do if you had all the money in the world?

    You're pretty much already in this situation, so you may as well do that. For me, the answer was moving to a town I lived in before. I started to do all the things that I never got around to doing the first time I was here, and because of that, started meeting people I never met before.

  24. #24
    Senior Member terra's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    Hmm, well I'd try:
    1) Playing MMORPG's
    2) Take up some course or classes (college, gym, yoga, etc.)
    3) Invest the money so it's not just sitting there
    4) Take up hobbies: writing, reading, drawing, web-design, playing an instrument, computers, etc.

    Writing short stories and comics or drawing things always makes me feel better - lets me express myself and gives me the feeling of some level of "Achievement" when I'm happy with the result. I'd love to start a web-comic! ^_^ hehe. Playing around with computers also makes me feel like I'm "doing something" and it can be quite addictive. Also I think try to take some time off work to go out and catch up with friends for coffee, etc. Not sure if this is of much help, but they are just what makes me feel better when I'm bored with the whole world

  25. #25
    God/dess FrustratedBunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Is it really all that worth it?

    I think I understand how you feel and I don't even dance. But I sort of feel the same way about life in general. I'm just blah, bored. Maybe I'm depressed or maybe it's just a plateau. I work my ass off and all that really keeps me happy is work. I've always sort of been like that Having a dog helps though.


    i take a week off every month and its always the most boring week ever..
    that's sort of how I feel about weekends. blah. I like to catch up on rest but come monday I'm ready to get back to work. I should just accept that I"m a workaholic.

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