I have just completed a 4-song couch dance for the most revolting creature that has ever walked this green earth. Fortunately it was the end of the night, and I could go home and shower promptly, which I did. And let me tell you ladies, I earned a fucking OSCAR this evening for the performance I gave that nasty coot. By the time we were done, he was so damn happy he'd dropped that $150 and he felt like the sexiest man alive. I'd like to thank the Academy...
This dude was old - said he was in his forties, looked like his seventies - and he was missing most of his teeth. The few he had were sparsely scattered and brown. He had thick, curly white hair growing all over his neck and smelled like a porta-potty on a hot day in Juarez. His fly was half-open (thankfully, nothing poking out). He had just finished his shift as a janitor, so who knows what he was covered in. And he kept telling me how much he wanted to spank me and what a dirty old man he was. He never tried to touch me, but he repeatedly asked me to "grab whatever you want!" (Yeah, I'm just DYING to grab your nasty old wenis.) About two songs in, he happily exclaimed that I was giving him a "boner," and when we were done he tried to kiss me on the cheek and said, "I'm gonna be having wet dreams about you for a long time."
I have to say, in the Most Disgusting Customer category, this guy is a powerful contender. Can you beat it? (To be eligible, you have to have danced for him for at least one full song!)


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He didn't buy a second one. But he didn't complain about the extreme air dance either!
right????


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