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Thread: Bouncer at my club acting stalker-ish!

  1. #1
    AlexxaHex
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    Default Bouncer at my club acting stalker-ish!

    There is a bouncer at my club I USED TO get along with and flirt casually with sometimes, but I think he's crossed the line. He had told me this past weekend that I should come in on Monday nights, because there is a regular who likes to spend money on the newer blondes. I though, "yay, I'm blonde and kind of new.", so I went in and checked it out. They guy never showed (I find out from another dancer that guy hasn't been in all summer) and I went home with very little money. I thought the whole thing was because the bouncer was working that night and wanted to see me because he sort of has a crush on me. I was kind of pissed, but I didn't say anything to him, just "forgot" to tip him and chalked it up to a learning experience and vowed never to work a Monday again.

    I was checking my voicemail this morning and heard a message from him, telling me he was sorry for telling me to come in on Monday and calling me by my REAL name. Then he asked if I wanted to hang out sometime and gave me his number. Then I realized that the number had shown up on my caller ID a few days ago.

    For him to have gotten my phone number and real name, he would have had to go into the club's dancer files to get it. And he called me from HIS phone, which tells me that he didn't use the work phone. For the phone call to be work related, I imagine he would be using the club's phone, just as any other employee had ever done in the past to call for a WORK RELATED reason.

    I am so pissed, and I feel violated. Not only is my phone number, real name and address on there, but my ss# too!
    I am going in tonight and complaining to the manager, but I also think I could sue the company, right? I mean, they aren't protecting my information at all. And this employee is sexually harassing me.

  2. #2
    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bouncer at my club acting stalker-ish!

    You can't sue the company if a "trusted company" worker who has access to the files uses them to contact you. However, if they do not remedy the problem, you may have a case.

    But, first things first. You have to log a complaint with management and see what they say/do. Of course, you would also have to PROVE that you did NOT give this guy your real name and phone number...and that he, in fact, got this information from company files. Being that you were flirting with him and are new...they may believe him if he says that you gave him your phone number and are mad cuz he hasn't hooked up with you...

    Tread carefully.

  3. #3
    Featured Member cameronfl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bouncer at my club acting stalker-ish!

    Tell him you arent comfortable with this, and you feel that it has crossed a line. Tell him, while you are flattered, you do not date anyone you work with to avoid the drama factor that almost always comes with it. And ask him to please not call you again.

    If he doesnt respect your wishes...go to management. Keep recordings of phone messages if you can so you can prove it if you have to.

    I HATE it when employees do this shit. Like we dont put up with enough from perv drunk assholes customers...we have to put up with it from staff too?? I dont think so.
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  4. #4
    AlexxaHex
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    Default Re: Bouncer at my club acting stalker-ish!

    Thanks for the advice ladies. I'll give him a warning, and THEN go to management about it if he continues. It still really bothers me though.
    I want to ask the manager how the files are kept and protected. It doesn't seem necessary for the bouncer to have access to my information. It is clearly the manager's job to make phone calls to independent contractors (the dancers) and take care of scheduling, not the bouncer.
    A bouncer has called me in the past also, but it was only to see if I was coming in because they were short on girls. I didn't find it strange, but I also wondered why the bouncer was calling me and not the manager.

  5. #5
    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bouncer at my club acting stalker-ish!

    ^ In some clubs, bouncers will also carry management duties...sometimes the DJ's do. It all depends on the club.

  6. #6
    God/dess Bella21's Avatar
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    Default Re: Bouncer at my club acting stalker-ish!

    Boo. I had that happen with a bouncer. I never complained to management and it's been a few years and I STILL get the odd phone call from him every few months! I guess he kept my parents house number. Anyways, I'd just try to make it very very clear to him that you are NOT interested before bringing management into it.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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