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Thread: Im getting spade

  1. #1
    Tart
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    Default Im getting spade

    Thats right. I no longer want anymore kids. Its so odd because a week ago you could have asked me if I wanted anymore children and I would have said " oh god yes I want at least one more "

    FUCK NO. I have two already an 11 year old and a 6 year old. Both are boys. So naturally it leaves me with the desire to have a girl. However, I babysat my niece who is a very very tiny lil' infant and ..um no. I think there comes a point in life where you simply dont have time or room , as selfish as that sounds ...to have another. Both of my kids are in school full time. I'm busy with working full time. Im just now able to have some sort of life where I can get to know me . I mean I had my first at 17. So in babysitting her, I thought...no way would i have the patience to do this again. I seriously just dont. Never even mind the 9 months of carrying a child.

    I was around my 2 year old godson this week as well., and he was my full on push to getter done. Its just so much work and effort and I would go insane if I had to do it again.

    I have given this more thought then you can imagine. But again im 28, Im dancing. I rent again. I have an 11 year old and a 6 year old. Im in no position to get pregnant and at least not for the next 5 years unless of course i win the lotto. The man I currently am dating doesnt want any children period. He's of course accepting of me and my two but doesn't want any of his own. Although him and I could part one day, I dont think it would change the way I feel about not having anymore kids.

    And just to throw in about the birthcontrol. i went off of it 2.5 weeks ago. And let me tell you I have never felt more sane, happier and easier to get along with in my LIFE!! I truly didnt ever realize how much those hormones fuck with you. Now i do. I have done every birthcontrol method out there outside of the ring and IUD. I just dont think Im cut out for BC. Now im just on the sponge with crossed fingers and pull out methods.

    So now comes the hard part. At least its looking hard to me. I can't google for the life of me a clinic in Chicago that provides sterilization for women . I did go to PPhood and it has a toll free number. Im not sure if I should call them for this or not.

    Has anyone here had tubal ligation? If so what was the pain like before and after ...the down time and how much was the cost and where did you go.


    Thank you for the info!

  2. #2
    Picaresque
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    Good luck! Definitely call Planned Parenthood. The PP's in some areas can do tubal ligations--but even in areas where they don't do them, they can point you in the direction of a non-PP doctor who can. Are you set on a tubal, or would Essure work for you? ( in case you're not familiar with it). If you are considering Essure, there's a link on their homepage which lists all the doctors (with contact info) by area who are able to perform the operation.

    I sympathize--I can't wait till I can get sterilized and no longer have to be paranoid and obsessive about birth control. But I'm going to wait until Adiana gets to the market, as it seems like a superior method to either of the ones that are out now (. For more information, you might try the Childfree board at EZboards--I know you already have kids, but there are a ton of threads and lots of information on sterilization there.

  3. #3
    Tart
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    Thanks so much for the info. but those 3 months yo'ud have to wait on essure ..not good. I am only using the sponge now and i refuse to go back on the pill. its nice to not be so fucking crazy for once.

    I think im going to have to go the old skool route of nip and snip.

  4. #4
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    A couple of mothers I work with said their tubal ligations came undone (& they got pregnant) because the doctors just band-ed the tubes, they did not cut & cauterize them. You might want to go over that with the doctor...just to make sure it goes right the first time.
    You actually sound like the ideal canidate for tubal ligation- they just scoff at the childless women who insist on getting tubal ligation at age 18.

  5. #5
    God/dess Andygirl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    I had a hysterectomy a year and a half ago and it was the best thing I've ever done. I was really sick with endometriosis and adenomyosis prior to it and it cured all that plus I have the added bonus of no cramps, no periods, and no ever having to worry about birth control. My fiance has a vasectomy so we are doubly insured. We can fuck like rabbits anytime of the month.

    Obviously you don't need to go that extreme, but I'm sure a tubal ligation would be an easy outpatient procedure. They probably do it by laparoscopy, and that's a very easy surgery.
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    God/dess VenusGoddess's Avatar
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    Check with your OB/Gyn? All I know is that when my friend had her 3rd child, she got a tubal right there...so...maybe your OB/Gyn can point you in the right direction...

  7. #7
    Tart
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    I no longer have an ob/gyn. Haven't for years. I've just went to PPhood for any and all. Cheaper for those without insurance like myself.

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    Senior Member Delany's Avatar
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    I don't think you are selfish at all for not wanting more children. Our resources on this earth are getting depleted so it's actually more selfish to have more than one or two kids.


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    Banned Katrine's Avatar
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    If you do not have any type of health insurance, the cost of getting those tubes tied is going to hurt. Of course, not all HI covers such voluntary procedures anyway. Good luck!

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  10. #10
    Tart
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    Yah i've seen it quoted online from anywhere 1000-6000. However its not like I can't afford it. Its worth saving up for. And a hell of a lot cheaper and less stressful then giving birth without medical insurance.

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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    there's another link at the bottom of the page that provides more info on the procedure.

    eta: oh i guess this is that procedure where you have to wait 3 months. maybe the other link can provide info on other options?

    btw, I know what you mean about hormonal birth control. I stopped taking the pill a long time ago and refuse to take any hormonal birth control. Not only does it fuck with my head and emotions, it gives me melasma on my face. ugh. I just use the copper IUD now.


  12. #12
    Tart
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    how bad is gettting an IUD?

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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    I didn't think it was too bad at all. It's kinda crampy being inserted but taking tylenol before hand helps alleviate some of it. The whole procedure just takes minutes, literally. Statistically speaking, it's probably as effective as tubal ligation. I won't lie though, my periods are heavier and my cramps are worse than before the iud. I usually pop a soma (carisoprodol) on my worst days. Works like a charm for the cramps.

    There are two different kinds: the paragard and the mirena. I have the paragard (copper and non hormonal). The mirena releases a small amount of progestin. Supposedly it helps lessen any monthly cramping but I said hell no to any more hormones. Besides, the mirena is only good for half the time frame as the paragard.

    eta: fwiw I know where you're coming from. I had my first at 19. They are 10 and 15 now but I'm just not quite ready yet to opt for permanent birth control.
    Last edited by LoveSexMoney; 09-23-2006 at 08:34 AM.


  14. #14
    Tart
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    thank you very much! ive always been curious about the IUD. I dont get cramps usually with my period but im assuming withsomething in there i would without a doubt.

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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    yeah, I never had cramps normally either. But hooooooo-weeeee I do now!

    You're welcome and good luck!


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    God/dess kitana's Avatar
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    Quote Originally Posted by VenusGoddess
    Check with your OB/Gyn? All I know is that when my friend had her 3rd child, she got a tubal right there...so...maybe your OB/Gyn can point you in the right direction...

    That's what I was thinking, lol!

    I know when I went in for my inital consult for my hystorectomy, it was with my OB. (I didn't like what he had to say, and went to another one, but...)

    I would call OB/GYN's in your area.
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    God/dess kitana's Avatar
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    Quote Originally Posted by Tart
    Yah i've seen it quoted online from anywhere 1000-6000. However its not like I can't afford it. Its worth saving up for. And a hell of a lot cheaper and less stressful then giving birth without medical insurance.
    When I went in for my follow up from my emergency D&C (due to a miscarriage and hemmorage), the OB was going to charge me $2,100, plus anestiesia and 2 day hospital stay.

    That's why hubby and I opted to get him "neutered", lol. He was in and out in 75 mins or so, and it only cost is $250.
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  18. #18
    Veteran Member Yung1's Avatar
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    Default Re: Im getting spade

    I hate to be so negative but please reconsider!!!!! I had a tubal at the ripe age of 21...on the delivery table after a c-section. I can't say what your recovery will be like, i think most of my pain was due to the C. BUT- the long term effects are going to drive me to have a hysterectomy at the ripe age of 24. Each month I have excrutiating cramps followed by 2 long days of hemmoraging, then 3 days of an almost normal period. My doctor tells me (after the procedure) that alot of women begin having "complicated" cycles after having a tubal. My mother, my aunt and several co-workers said they experienced the same thing. And if for some reason if you should ever want to reverse it-$6000. Your recovery shouldnt be bad at all though, I was able to vaccum the house 3 days after my C/tubal. Talk with your doctor, and do whats best for you!GOOD LUCK!

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