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Thread: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

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    Featured Member AkashaM's Avatar
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    Angry Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    I have a page on MySpace called "Ask a Stripper" http://www.myspace.com/askdrstripper I was bored one day and created it. People send me mostly relationship questions and I answer them. One girl wrote me and said that she was a dancer and needed help improving her hustle. I had made a comment that I get upset on those nights where everyone is turning you down and the end of the night you have a $100 or less. I never sit on my ass and complain so when I made my measly $100--I worked hard for it. One guy had made a comment:
    "You want to cry on nights when you have $100 to your name at the end of the night? Get the fuck out of here! What makes you think that you should earn more than that? See, that's why this country (along with Western Europe) is going to shit. We got uneducated bimbos (no offense) getting upset that they take home $100 on a SLOW night and cab drivers with Master degrees from Bangalore working double shifts to pay off a shitty two bedroom in a terrible neighborhood. Now I know you make way more than $100 on an average night (because men are stupid) but to be perfectly honest, based on your human capital, you should be thankful for every red cent that you get because... to be perfectly honest... you don't DO anything (save me the song and dance about how hard you have it standing on your feet for 6 hours straight, migrant farmers have it rough and earn $5 an hour if they're lucky). PS I hope you're having a good day."

    I have known this guy as one of my readers for awhile and he usually has something to say--but it doesnt bother me. I felt this time he was out of line--and misinformed.

    This same guy emailed and asked a question about a girl he met that he was considering going out with. He told that she had a lowpaying job--he had suggested that she dance because it takes "minimal effort" is "not mentally taxing" and is "easy money" the girl told him that she felt that dancing is a demeaning job. he told me that he felt he couldnt date her because he felt she was lying "because every woman has wanted to do it" and he couldnt be with someone that is lying about it. I replied by telling him that he didnt know what he was talking about and not every woman wants to be a stripper and he was direspectful and had a skewed vision of women.

    This was his response:

    "You missed a small detail: she's lying to me. I said that all women considered stripping at some point in their lives (because it IS EASY MONEY). I told her to consider stripping because she can make enough money to do what she wants (move out of her mom's place) and since it's not mentally taxing she would also have the ability to go to back to school. Her telling me that it's "demeaning" is total bullshit. She doesn't want to do it because she's either embarassed of her body or is unmotivated. I appreciate frankness and hate it when people insult my intelligence. Speaking of frankness, which part of my posts did you find insulting? The part where I wrote that strippers don't do anything? Prove me otherwise. Tell me all the hard work you put in every night and how challenging your job is and why you think you should earn more than a civil engineer (who actually has an education). Lastly, my attitude towards woman is not skewed. I'm simply realistic, and yes, I've dated strippers before. I even lived with one. It's not that different from dating a regular girl."

    While you may find his response annoying...we all know that is the opinion of many people who are not in the industry.

    My question to everyone here is this: Do you feel that this line of work is easy or "easy money"? Do you feel that it is mentally taxing? Do you feel guilty about the money that you make--whatever the amount?

    Oh! and if you have a MS page--drop me a line and a friend request!
    I'm getting my Dial-A-Stripper service up and running again. If you are in NYC or NJ and are interested in private party dancing, email [email protected] with your SW handle, contact info, photo (if you have one) & best time to call and I'll get back to you asap.

    If you're having a party and need strippers, email me with the details and any questions you have. Thanks!

  2. #2
    madmaxine
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    This guy is crazy in a bad way. Delete him from your "Friends" list.

    Strippers: pay business expenses (house fees, wardrobe, travel to & from work, etc.) are exposed to higher risk of assault, have to work full shifts or risk termination, and pay taxes or risk losing all the gains they've made with their "quick cash" income. Not to mention deal with the emotional & mental strain of dealing with men who have to pay for a woman's attention because they can't get it for free outside of the club.

    This is a hard job. In every way. I don't feel one damn bit of guilt. "God helps those who help themselves."

    This guy is a jealous hater.

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Hell, no, it's not "easy". If this guy thinks we're getting easy money I wonder what he thinks of hedge fund managers. Perhaps he should be worried about larger economic issues than those of unskilled women in the sex industry if he's so concerned about the injustices in our world.

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    And you haven't ripped this guy a new one, why?
    Zis ees a dead profile! I'm now idreamofaislin!

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    God/dess Paris's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    smile and nod, smile and nod.

    He is just trying to provoke you. Ignore him.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


  6. #6
    Cally
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    He must be on stripclublist hes funny I've stopped caring about these idiots.. they're just amusing

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Maybe from his perspective, he is right. That doesn't mean you have to take it personally. As long as you can define yourself within your culture, and you know what you are, what he thinks doesn't mean a whole lot.

    There could be a whole lot of different meanings to his post. The most important thing is whether you feel comfortable with where you are and who you are, and where you stand in life.

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    Featured Member AkashaM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    oh, I know he is just "trolling" (as you all see too) but I'm asking because I am interested in how you define your work. Do you take pride in it? On a night when you've made nothing, you KNOW that you worked. On a night when you made $3,000, you know that you worked...but how do we define "work" as a dancer? Whereas other people dont consider it "work."

    After reading this guys bs, I was curious on your take...because I have alway felt any entertainer "works" although you're not diging ditches or pencil pushing.

    While this individual has no bearing on my day to day life, it doesnt bother me. you guys dont have to worry, lol

    however I planned on writing a blog about the nature of the work for people who are considering dancing, as well the people who dont understand the work. its was just funny that he wrote this at this time as I was planning it out in my mind. I am looking for everyone's definition.


    Quote Originally Posted by kittykat88
    And you haven't ripped this guy a new one, why?
    oh i did, i just didnt bother to post it. here it is.
    "Do you really want me to answer this, or are you just trolling your way through my page?

    You insult what I do for a living by saying that I "do nothing" yet suggest to a girl (that you just met) that she quit her current job and dance? If she feels that she is not willing to be a "pole dancer" and rather be a sales associate--thats her fucking business. And you need to mind yours.
    Insinuating there is something wrong with her because she never considered dancing, shows there is something wrong with YOU.
    Furthermore, if you got involved with someone in that line of work, you would not be supportive to that girl.
    (And frankly, your bullshit comment that exotic dancing takes "minimal effort" and "minimal stress" is waaaay off--you have no idea what you are talking about)
    Now you're concerned that you "cant vibe with her" because she doesnt want to be an exotic dancer and would rather sell clothes?
    Let me guess, you have said this in the past, "If I were a stripper, I would make soooo much money!" or "If I were a girl, I would be the biggest slut." You're one in a million...
    Sure, keep the coat...meet the girl for drinks, but if you actually speak to women the way that you left that comment in my entry...I think its better you stay home, because you are VERY disrespectful and have a skewed attitude about women."
    Last edited by AkashaM; 09-23-2006 at 06:26 PM.
    I'm getting my Dial-A-Stripper service up and running again. If you are in NYC or NJ and are interested in private party dancing, email [email protected] with your SW handle, contact info, photo (if you have one) & best time to call and I'll get back to you asap.

    If you're having a party and need strippers, email me with the details and any questions you have. Thanks!

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    God/dess erotictonic's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    The real question is: why are you so worried about what he said? It must have triggered something within you that you haven't dealt with yourself.

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    Featured Member AkashaM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    uh, not really...just that i was planning on writing a blog about stripping (because I dont discuss the industry too much) and he wrote this comment while i was planning this blog. No, I dont have any issues with this guy personally and i said it before. nor do i have any issues with myself (outside of big boob envy-since my are gone now that i lost weight! hahahaha)

    **sigh** i knew people were going to say that, just answer the question...I am perfectly fine. LOL
    I'm getting my Dial-A-Stripper service up and running again. If you are in NYC or NJ and are interested in private party dancing, email [email protected] with your SW handle, contact info, photo (if you have one) & best time to call and I'll get back to you asap.

    If you're having a party and need strippers, email me with the details and any questions you have. Thanks!

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    Featured Member WiseGuy_TX's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    ...well, he goes on the offensive with 13 "you's or you're's" in the first post and then he goes into defensive mode with 13 "I, I've, I'm, me, my's" which is frankly unintelligent and he is simply trying to bait you into arguing. Never answer his questions or statements directly.

    PS. i think he may have posted to SW before. ...glad you are fine with it too.
    "Peter, did you take Stewie to a strip-club? He smells like sweat and fear." - Lois and Stewie (Family Guy) ... "Through early morning fog I see, Visions of the things to be, The pains that are withheld for me, I realize and I can see..."

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    It's a job just like any other - who here really likes working and doing a job . He's a guy with an opinion and not much to back it with . I always have said don't talk down to anyone until you have walked a mile in their shoes . Not that I will ever be a dancer or walk in their shoes - but at least I shut up and listen and try to learn from the people here . ( plus I dont look good in pumps lol )

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    God/dess erotictonic's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Quote Originally Posted by AkashaM
    uh, not really...just that i was planning on writing a blog about stripping (because I dont discuss the industry too much) and he wrote this comment while i was planning this blog. No, I dont have any issues with this guy personally and i said it before. nor do i have any issues with myself (outside of big boob envy-since my are gone now that i lost weight! hahahaha)

    **sigh** i knew people were going to say that, just answer the question...I am perfectly fine. LOL
    If you honestly didn't have any issues with it, you wouldn't even notice it. Do you notice ants in an anthill? It means something to you.

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    A lot of it is arrogance on his part I think. I mean his attitude is: How dare you make so much money without a degree? lol People see the glamour and think it's all fun and games for the working dancer and never realize the physical and emotional costs. Too many people have this attitude toward working people in all walks of life, I'm afraid.

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    Featured Member AkashaM's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Quote Originally Posted by WiseGuy_TX
    ...well, he goes on the offensive with 13 "you's or you're's" in the first post and then he goes into defensive mode with 13 "I, I've, I'm, me, my's" which is frankly unintelligent and he is simply trying to bait you into arguing. Never answer his questions or statements directly.

    PS. i think he may have posted to SW before. ...glad you are fine with it too.
    Hmm very perceptive...lol. but yeah of course he's starting an argument-an then refered to it as "constructive critism". (i didnt post the entire comment) As for posting here, I wouldnt be suprised...trolling around the net, lol. I kinda got the TUSCL vibe from this. I secretly enjoy keeping that guy around so other readers shit on him when he says off color things--it keeps it interesting.

    Quote Originally Posted by CuriousJ
    It's a job just like any other - who here really likes working and doing a job . He's a guy with an opinion and not much to back it with . I always have said don't talk down to anyone until you have walked a mile in their shoes . Not that I will ever be a dancer or walk in their shoes - but at least I shut up and listen and try to learn from the people here . ( plus I dont look good in pumps lol )
    hmm, pumps on you? only if theyre red..

    Quote Originally Posted by erotictonic
    If you honestly didn't have any issues with it, you wouldn't even notice it. Do you notice ants in an anthill? It means something to you.
    Do i take it as, "oh he hurt my feelings."? No, I don't. Is it a meaty topic for disscussion? yes it is. Does it have entainment value? sure it does. People have written me with things that are far more out there. Of course i noticed it--he sent me an email. i notice everything on my page. But i dont think you understand my posting in its context--maybe i came across wrong.
    I'm getting my Dial-A-Stripper service up and running again. If you are in NYC or NJ and are interested in private party dancing, email [email protected] with your SW handle, contact info, photo (if you have one) & best time to call and I'll get back to you asap.

    If you're having a party and need strippers, email me with the details and any questions you have. Thanks!

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    The internet makes people act on the asshole inside themselves. Ugh. There are a million reasons why that person has that opinion... Fuck 'em. One time, I got a typical pick up line myspace message that I ignored (like I do all of them). And the guy saw that I read and didn't respond and he wrote back insulting my looks (actually, this happened a couple of times). People can be REALLY pathetic. Ugh. /rant

    The dude just sounds jealous that we can complain about $100 a night. They forget we don't usually work 5 nights/days a week.
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Cally
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Honestly there is no point in even paying attention to it. Usually I just laugh at the stupidity these people have. Honestly they're just a bunch of morons who are generally a regection to day to day society. Dont reply to him, thats what he wants. No point in getting defencive because thats the reaction they're looking for. Move on and pretend it doesnt exist

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Quote Originally Posted by AkashaM

    Do i take it as, "oh he hurt my feelings."? No, I don't. Is it a meaty topic for disscussion? yes it is. Does it have entainment value? sure it does. People have written me with things that are far more out there. Of course i noticed it--he sent me an email. i notice everything on my page. But i dont think you understand my posting in its context--maybe i came across wrong.
    No, you didn't come across wrong. I can see why you would notice overall perspectives (even that sometimes is extremely distorted). Let's take Britney Spears, for instance. I think we can all agree that she is an attractive girl with talents. How many negative e-mails do you think she receives per day? Thousands? Do you think she reads them?

    The point is: Take it with a grain of salt. You know where you stand. Your time would be better spend on furthering your career. Just something I noticed....

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Stripping isn't easy money, but it's money that's more easily accessed and doesn't require a lot of things that other jobs do. People mistake that for easy.

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Working my ass off for a $100 was not easy. Working my ass off for $3000 was not easy. But, I got dressed, did my hair, nails, put my make up on...got into the mind set and hit the floor. No matter what I made, I worked my ass off.

    Stripping is not easy. You have to deal with "personal rejection" every night. Dancing in 6-8" platforms is not easy, either. Dealing with men like the one you posted about is standard and draining. It's annoying to dance for guys who do not know what "no contact" means and guys who fall in "love" but never out of it. It would be "easier" to work at McD's...but the pay there sucks and there are not many places where you can tell a customer to fuck off and move on to the next one.

    No job is "easy"...but kudos to the dancers that this guy "knows" who are so good at what they do that they make it look easy.

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Bah, all of those professional ballet dancers and ice skaters in the Olympics. What they do is SO easy, anyone can do it! Men who believe that attractive women have everything handed to them in life, and that stripping takes no effort have no ability to empathize. They can't put themselves in another person's shoes. Think about it. The guy who says, "I would be such a slutty extras whore if I was a chick" can't draw the parallel that they would be getting fucked by LOTS of gross guys, exposing themselves to the risk of rape, STD, pregnance, and social ostracization.

    Stripping is the easiest or hardest job to have. It doesn't have long-term earning potential either. Some nights it was easy to make cash hand over fist, some nights it felt humiliating or degrading begging for dollars.

    If he cares so much about the plight of migrant workers making $5, why doesn't HE do something about that?

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    I got a similar post to my blog this morning, reading, in part:

    ...get your shit together. the fact that you blog about it and you're "taking notes" does not excuse the fact you're a stripper. stop stripping, is what i'd do. otherwisse keep stripping and stop blogging.

    And yeah, it did irritate me. I'm not going to be thinking about it an hour from now, but right now I'm pissed. I suppose I started the blog and put myself in the public domain, so now I have to take whatever random bullshit people decide to dish out, but I'm not thrilled. Still, I learned to deal with negative energy directed at me in the club, I guess I can learn to deal with it in cyberspace.

    Your poster sounds like a complete cunt, by the way. Block him.

    In answer to your question, to me there is no clearer indication that what I do is work than the fact that I make more money as I improve my skills. If it were easy money I would have walked right into the club and started making big bucks. It took me MONTHS to figure out this job, and I still consider myself a relative beginner.

    What work do we do? We do cold reads on customers, assess their mood and needs, and in a best case scenario provide them with relaxing, amusing sensual entertainment. It's a service. Most people don't understand what we do because we live in a culture that undervalues sensuality and eroticism. To me, the fact that we get paid what we do is pretty clear evidence that we provide a service that people need and value. Some people want to boil the basic human need for physical touch and sexual stimulation down to a slur like "men are stupid" as a reason why our job is so well-paid, but it's more than that.

    So there.

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Quote Originally Posted by xoxoGracexoxo
    I got a similar post to my blog this morning, reading, in part:

    ...get your shit together. the fact that you blog about it and you're "taking notes" does not excuse the fact you're a stripper. stop stripping, is what i'd do. otherwisse keep stripping and stop blogging.

    And yeah, it did irritate me. I'm not going to be thinking about it an hour from now, but right now I'm pissed. I suppose I started the blog and put myself in the public domain, so now I have to take whatever random bullshit people decide to dish out, but I'm not thrilled. Still, I learned to deal with negative energy directed at me in the club, I guess I can learn to deal with it in cyberspace.
    Grace, I can't believe someone was stupid enough to write that! What the hell, are they Al Gore? Did they invent the internet? Otherwise, who the hell are they to tell you whether or not you can blog?! I've read your blog and I think it's great and well-written! GAWD! I can't believe someone said that!
    If you think school is hard, try being stupid.

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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    Quote Originally Posted by AkashaM
    oh, I know he is just "trolling" (as you all see too) but I'm asking because I am interested in how you define your work. Do you take pride in it? On a night when you've made nothing, you KNOW that you worked. On a night when you made $3,000, you know that you worked...but how do we define "work" as a dancer? Whereas other people dont consider it "work."

    After reading this guys bs, I was curious on your take...because I have alway felt any entertainer "works" although you're not diging ditches or pencil pushing.
    IMO:
    We, as exotic dancers need to focus on the word dance. In the form of the word for our job description it is in reference to the artistic movement of the body. We perform for audiences and individuals, we work to elicit an emotional reaction from the viewers of our dance (or art form). Our real job is to entertain. Some exotic dancers hit that mark more often than others; we are just like any other performer, be it an actor, singer, musician, comedian, preacher, talk show host, newscaster, juggler, contortionist or any other performance art that you can think of.

    Some people indulge in their art for only their own personal pleasure, some do it as a hobby for small audiences, some use their art to earn a full time income, and some gain fame and fortune through their art. I highly doubt your troll friend would accuse Areosmith of not having a "real job" or that their art takes no work to produce. The problem with the attitude of the troll is that he does not value the intellectual effort of the kind of work that artists produce.

    As dancers, we not only have to have the intellect in order to "sell" ourselves (as well as a whole host of other things that need to go into being street smart to stay safe in this business and not getting taken advantage of by just about everyone in the gentlemen's club industry),but have to have the physical stamina to do our jobs 3-7 nights a week. Most people couldn't even walk across a room wearing the kind of shoes we dance in much less do so for 40 hours a week. I challenge any man to get up there and dance and do pole tricks, then get off that stage, wander the room selling dances and performing 20+ private dances in the course of an 8 hour shift.

    Ask any dancer who has only been on the job for less than a week. She probably can hardly move because every muscle in her body is sore from the exertion. I joke with the guys and say I can dance circles around any aerobics instructor, but in reality I probably can. I not only have to put forth that kind of effort on a daily basis, but I must do so in a smoke filled atmosphere. I don't have the time to drink enough water, and am constantly offered alcoholic beverages or sugary soft drinks. If there is food available in the club, likely it is something greasy like burgers and fries. Most of the time there is no food available and no place to store a bag lunch, either.

    Then one must think about the fact that we don't stop working just because we aren't at the club. The effort that has to go into beauty care is not a small one for most exotic dancers. Many have had plastic surgery to feel better about themselves and to be more marketable to a larger audience. Most dancers make at least some effort to stay trim, to keep their skin and hair and nails looking pretty. Many will have cosmetic dentistry. Look around any strip club and if you see a completely natural girl, she will be very rare indeed (by this I mean, no hair color, never worn braces, all natural skin color, natural nails, basically no cosmetic changes more drastic than lipstick).

    Sure, exotic dancers make more money than most artists. Welcome to America and the puritanical roots of our society that has bestowed upon us as a population the taboo nature of sexuality, and female sexuality in particular. Men have very strong emotional needs that are sexual in nature, women are brought up to believe that their sexual needs are bad or evil or sinful. When one wishes to insult a woman the usual epithet that is called upon has to do with female sexuality. Slut, whore, bitch, harlot, skank, cunt, jezebel, etc. etc. Crimes of a sexual nature are usually put upon the women. If a woman is raped, her sexual history is called up to see if "she was asking for it". It has been a long held belief that women, if allowed to expiernce sexual freedom, would become completely out of control nymphos.

    When in reality, men are the ones who have a harder time controlong their sexual desires and are scared to death of the kind of power women can hold over their heads in the form of sexual coersion. We females may not have the physical power to compete with men on the battlefield, but we can rule the world from the bedroom.

    If, as a society, we truly had sexual freedom, then exotic dancing wouldn't be worth anything. Dancers would dance because they wanted to, men and women would both enjoy the art form and exotic dancers would be paid similarly to other artists. But because of our puritanical roots, female exotic dancers (and gay male dancers) make an extrodinay amount of money, and the market is huge for that kind of entertainment. It would be like watching TV, always available to everyone who wants to look.

    So, really, it is the laws that have governed us in our private lives that have created the power of female sexuality and the highly paid nude dancer. Fellas, all you have to do is look in the mirror to see why strippers make so much money.


    Promote yourself and earn more money! This is a business that is owned by strippers for strippers. Let's make that money!


  25. #25
    God/dess Dottie Rebel's Avatar
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    Default Re: Rude MySpacer?? possibly off topic-not sure...

    ^^^Very well said, Paris.

    And might I add that we are salespeople. Selling is a legitimate skill. I've spent countless hours studying and researching to learn how to sell to the best of my ability. The cultivation of my persona, the acting required to provide fantasy entertainment, these are skills.

    So what if the product I am selling seems worthless to him. There are plenty of products that I do not have a use or desire for but I do not consider those who sell them to not have "real" jobs--or hold them in contempt.

    He has been burned by a stripper before and in his PL'dom he has cultivated a resentment toward all dancers. Just because he begrudges us does not make our jobs easy.

    Delete and block, is my advice.

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