Just wondering if anyone had any amusing stories to share about work? I could do with a giggle!
Just wondering if anyone had any amusing stories to share about work? I could do with a giggle!



um...a guy in a wheelchair with a foot fetish wanting to suck on my toes? not trying to rag on people with disabilities, but this was the first time ive met a toe-lover and it was a weird experiance for me
ive seen two spun out dancers get in a full out brawl in the dressing room becouse one of them threw out the others empty plastic cup. scarey.
OKay I have a giggle......at least, it made me giggle....
So I'm in the chamapagne room with this guy, we're having red wine and he is being oh-so-suave (eye roll). He's leaning towards me, giving me some version of a sultry stare, and this part in itself is making me laugh.....he then winks at me over the top of his glass as he goes to take a sip, keep in mind our heads are maybe 6 inches apart from each other, and as soon as he swallows the sip.......he chokes on it! Coughing and sputtering he sprays red wine all over my face! It was in my hair, dripping from my eye lashes and down my nose, covered my chest! Thank goodness the dress was black and easily washed or I might not have laughed so hard!
Getting wine spit on me wasn't exactly my idea of a good time, but him trying SO HARD to be seductive and sexy and then THAT! I swear I was looking for the candid camera!
~B
Last edited by ExoticEngineer; 09-24-2006 at 09:56 AM. Reason: Because I have had my coffee yet
last night i told a guy that asked my longhaired mountain man customer. (who btw hasnt had a drink or anything in 18 years) if he had drugs, that he was the head of DEA in jacksonville and he only let it slide because they were both in a strip club and he was off duty.
the guy flipped out and handed me a 20 for tipping him off LMAO so hard at his face.
to be clear my custy DOES NOT work for DEA or any law enforcement
In a champagne room in Jersey many moons ago I had a customer who wanted me to watch him stick a Barbie up his ass. Yes a barbie. The head end. It was weird shit. But for that kind of money- I don;t care if you stick the dream house in there.



I don't think I could beat any of the other stories here, but this is none-the-less pretty amusing. One night a group of soccer players came in from a daylong tournament and decided to come to the strip club as a team. Most of them were very young, so you wouldn't expect what happened next to happen at all... especially with someone 21-25 years old.
He fell asleep during a lapdance.![]()
It wasn't me being boring, it was the fact that they played a half dozen games that day and he literally did not have any energy. I think he was happier when I just sat on his lap and ran my fingers in his hair for a few minutes than getting a lap dance at that point. I could hardly control myself when it happened though.
Isocrates: “Democracy destroys itself because it abuses its right to freedom and equality. Because it teaches its citizens to consider audacity as a right, lawlessness as a freedom, abrasive speech as equality, and anarchy as progress.”
One night I had one too many tequilas and thought I was still okay to do pole tricks....so I'm upside down on the pole swinging, coming down and got dizzy...the stage stops short on one side so you have to spot yourself just right for the ever so sexy dismount. Well I was so dizzy, I didn't realized that I stopped on the short side and let go and ended up hittting some custy in the head with my feet and falling on his lap LMAO
I apologized and crawled back on stage as if nothing happened. Thank goodness it was a dead night. I still crack myself up thinking bout that night. Now I do pole tricks SOBER.
K, this happened just a while ago....I'm in VIP dancing for a guy and I'm leaning over him but standing, one knee on the side of him, he reaches out and jsut as I am about to slap his hand away from my crotch, he grabs my tampon string wich aparenty was hanging out and gives it a tug "Ding Dong!" he says!
I guess I didn't tuck that sucker very securely!
I laughed, he laughed, we all had a great time over it.
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now ive only been doing this part time for a month and not much has happened but i thought this was freekin halarious. i was on stage and a custy sat down and put a few bucks on the stage so i came over to give him a dance. he ask me the same question they all ask, "whats your name?" i said bobbi. he slid his chair back and had this look on his face of great concern and replied "you are a girl right?". now its quite obvious that i AM a girl and all i could do was laugh. the look on this mans face was priceless.![]()





These don't really involve customers, but a while ago my friend and I were all drunk at work and we were singing that sailor song from the Spongebob Squarepants show. "Yo ho ho, yo ho ho, a sailor's life is the life for me."
This didn't actually happen at work, but right before work. My friend and I were going into work and we were getting out of the taxi. I couldn't get my seat belt off and I said "How do I get my seat belt off?" The taxi driver said "Push the button" like I'm some kind of moron. I said "I am, it's not coming off." The cab driver comes in the back and tries to help me get it off. She said "Oh my god, she's right, it's stuck!" My friend is laughing her ass off, and I said "Yeah, it's funny because you're not the one who's stuck!" But really, I was laughing because it was pretty funny, and we were early so I wasn't going to be late for work or anything. My friend went in the club and told the bartender and DJ, and they were laughing their asses off too. I wiggled around for a few minutes and finally was able to get out. At least I had an amusing story to tell the customers that night.![]()
Used to hav a regular come in a few times a week. he was about 80 years old, we would go into VIp rooms and just laugh and act silly and talk. no dancing. Except one night I aske dhim to give me a lap dance, and he dropped his jeans and started doing that air hump thing in his tighty whites, with his old man ass flapping around.
I worked at a bar that remodeled and put the fog machine above the mirrored wall that was the entrance to the main stage. It was a really cool plexiglass floor with neon lights in it. I hadn't worked there in awhile and came out onstage and started doing the fred flinstone as I hit the condensation on thefloor. I actually had to make myself fall to get out of it. I bet it was priceless. Wish I had a video to this day!
I've already posted many of my humorous incidents while visiting SCs over the years ... like a dancer friend dancing for a customer with a toupee that kept moving during the dance ... throwing paper airplanes around the club ... playing footback in the back of the club on a slow Sat afternoon ... heals flying off dancers into the crowd ... dedicating songs to dancers on their stage sets like "baby got back" and "I touch myself" ... getting a table dance out in the middle of the club from a dancer friend while she was wearing a house coat and had rollers in her hair ... seeing how the dancers were just as bad as the customers when the club hired a male dancer for a Jack & Jill show on New Years (one house dancer bit the male performer in the butt while he was on stage) ... etc., etc., etc.
Well Here's a story I hadn't posted anywhere else yet. ... This one time at band camp... oh, I mean this one night at a SC I used to visit there was a customer who was completely wasted, so much so, that all his friends had already left but he decided to hang around. For a while he just kind of sat staring at the stage in kind of a drunen fog, but then he eventually calls over one of the massage girls for a back rub. Well, he leans forward in his chair and it's revealed that he's wearing a leopard print thong. Not just briefs but a thong! The massage girl was cracking up laughing and she kept signaling the other staff members to come walk around and see his thong. He was completely oblivious. At one point, a dancer grabbed the clubs polaroid camera and snapped off some pictures while the massage girl posed behind him. He didn't even react to the camera flashes. People were falling on the floor in hysterics all around him and he had no clue. ... The good part is even though the club had a few laughs at his expense they called a cab and at least made sure he was sent home safely.
If you can't win. Make the fellow in front of you break the record.





This happened while I was bartending at a very small bar with only two dancers per shift:
The one girl was so drunk ( she fell off the stage and got wedged between the speed rack and the stage (speed rack is only two feet from the stage) with her arms and legs in the air.
Everytime I tried to pull her out (she's was quite a bit heavier than me), she would fall right back in.
I just about peed myself it was so funny. I finally got her out and had to send her home.
Bridgette, no kidding! I was kinda floored at first, but then he started laughing...so I did too! He wound up staying in VIP for a while that night, and it was a topic of conversation for most of the night. I've done plenty of other goofy/dorky stuff while working...but you have to laugh at yourself....preferably before anyone else does!
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Speed rack is where the most frequently used liquors are kept for speedy access.
My funny story...When our club was being remodeled, we had a little makeshift VIP, it was concrete for F sake. Anyhoo, I had this old school Italian, bigwig VIP. He made a scene every time he was in...He had to have a least 3 tables for his entourage and he had to sit at the head of the set up, and I, as his lady sat right next to him and played hostess. Well, this one night, everyone had just been seated and served their drinks. I excused myself to use the ladies room. (I was looking quite hot, if I may say so, in my floor length WHITE gown.) As I returned, my very best friend who was a waitress had come over to say hello, show her respect to Mr. Bigwig blah blah...I go to take my seat next to him...and flop right on the dirty, hard, concrete floor, legs up in the air and all!!My loving best friend thought she was helping me by pushing my seat back. Bigwig pretended not to notice, I got up to my chair as if nothing had happened...wow was my ego crushed! Only time will heal that wound!
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