Results 1 to 10 of 10

Thread: "Are you Latino"

  1. #1
    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Cash-Stack-istan Island
    Posts
    14,704
    Thanks
    6,564
    Thanked 11,625 Times in 3,697 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    "Are you Latino"

    Got this email today. Hilarious.....




    WHY LATINOS CAN'T BE TERRORISTS


    1. 8:45am is too early for us to be up.


    2. We are always late, we would have missed all 4 flights.


    3. Pretty people on the plane distract us.


    4. We would talk loudly and bring attention to ourselves.


    5. With food and drinks on the plane, we would forget why we're there.


    6. We talk with our hands, therefore we would have to put our weapons down.


    7. We would ALL want to fly the plane.


    8. We would argue and start a fight in the plane.


    9. We can't keep a secret, we would have told everyone a week before doing
    it.


    AND MY FAVORITE.....


    10. We would have put our country's flag on the windshield.





    ARE YOU A LATINO? HOW CAN YOU TELL FOR SURE?


    1) If you have ever been hit by a "Chancleta. "


    2) If you grew up scared by something called "El Cuco"


    3) If others tell you to stop screaming when you are really just talking.


    4) If you light a candle to Virgin Mary on the night before your big test


    5) If you use your lips to point something out.


    6) If you constantly refer to cereal as "con fleys".


    7) If your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you for dinner,
    even if it's a one bedroom apartment.


    If you can dancemerengue,cumbia, or salsa without music.


    9) If you use "margarina" instead of olive oil and can't figure out why
    your butt is getting bigger.


    10) If you are in a five passenger car with seven people in it and a person
    is shouting "súbanse, todaviacaben!"


    11) If whenever you feel under the weather, you compulsively dab on some
    "vapor rub" all over your chest and inside your nostrils.


    12) Your mom packs your "lonchera" every day even though you've just turned
    thirty-two.


    13) If you call the North Americans "gringos", including Canadians, and
    call all Asian people "chinos" or "chinitos" and you call the corner store
    "the chinito store".

  2. #2
    God/dess
    Joined
    Jan 2005
    Location
    NJ
    Posts
    3,786
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts

    Default Re: "Are you Latino"

    I don't know...quite a few of those apply to Italians who grew up in NYC! Especially the mom yelling in a one bedroom. Different language maybe, but same premise!

    Very funny as usual Vyanka!

  3. #3
    God/dess JustJayda's Avatar
    Joined
    May 2005
    Location
    Philly- Cheesesteaks, Tastykakes and Misto shakes!!
    Posts
    2,691
    Thanks
    15
    Thanked 24 Times in 21 Posts
    My Mood
    Psychedelic

    Default Re: "Are you Latino"

    14. You answer the telephone "bueno"? or "Hoy"!

    15. You wear white jeans all year long

    16. You wear black pantyhose with white pumps.

    17. Your hair is dyed the color of Elmo's fur

    18. Your infant/toddler wears more gold than Mr. T

    19. You have $5000 rims on a shitty car

    20. You can hold an unlit cigarette on your bottom lip, and have 3 conversations w/o it falling (my dad is famous for that one).

    21. If you're not Mexican, you hate being called Mexican.

    22. You hate Taco Bell with a passion

    23. Tequlia does not get you phucked up!

    24. Your uela (abuela/abuelita), tia, and several tio's live in your house.

    25. You use Western Union or Moneygram more than once a week.

    26. You have an aunt that's younger than you.
    Quote Originally Posted by MarvelGirl View Post
    Oh, and nope, rubbing titties isn't air dancing.
    Quote Originally Posted by Sophia_Starina View Post
    The cut-off age for stripping is when customers stop paying you.

    The end.

  4. #4
    Featured Member Crow's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Down South
    Posts
    1,145
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 10 Times in 8 Posts
    My Mood
    Happy

    Default Re: "Are you Latino"

    Some of thoes apply to Greeks and Irish too. Funny! Thanks for the laugh..

  5. #5
    God/dess Lysondra's Avatar
    Joined
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Another Country
    Posts
    18,664
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 148 Times in 100 Posts

    Default Re: "Are you Latino"

    I am SO guilty of the yelling/talking thing. :/


    Look like a woman
    Think like a man
    Act like a lady
    Work like a dog

    - My Great Grandmother Bessie's Recipe for Success

  6. #6
    Featured Member
    Joined
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Planet Earth
    Posts
    1,809
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post

    Default Re: "Are you Latino"

    Tequila doesn't get me all fucked up. Yay i must be Latino I like tequila.
    Fools laugh at others. Wisdom laughs at itself...Osho

  7. #7
    Veteran Member lwtex52's Avatar
    Joined
    Dec 2004
    Location
    Dallas, ByGod, Texas
    Posts
    658
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 2 Times in 1 Post

    Default Re: "Are you Latino"

    Quote Originally Posted by JustJayda
    19. You have $5000 rims on a shitty car
    23. Tequlia does not get you phucked up!
    25. You use Western Union or Moneygram more than once a week.
    19. They're on my truck. Does that count?
    23. It doesn't, which is amazing. I'm Native American and the theory is that we get drunk if we just hear the words "Jose Cuervo"
    25. You got me on that one. Six times a week. My bookie is a greedy bastard.
    My latest conspiracy theory: I am convinced that Dick Cheney is, in reality, Elmer Fudd.

  8. #8
    Veteran Member
    Joined
    May 2006
    Location
    Indianapolis
    Posts
    666
    Thanks
    0
    Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts

    Default Re: "Are you Latino"

    Wow! most are pretty freakin' true. I especially grew up with #2, #6, and #13! pretty funny.

  9. #9
    God/dess Vyanka's Avatar
    Joined
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Cash-Stack-istan Island
    Posts
    14,704
    Thanks
    6,564
    Thanked 11,625 Times in 3,697 Posts
    My Mood
    Angelic

    Default Re: "Are you Latino"

    "Ba-ring some platanos, ju kno."
    Last edited by Vyanka; 10-16-2006 at 01:43 PM.

  10. #10
    madmaxine
    Guest

    Default Re: "Are you Latino"

    Hahahahahahahahah!

Similar Threads

  1. "Hun," "Baby," "Darlin'" and other endearing terms
    By Chicagoeditor in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 74
    Last Post: 10-29-2013, 04:02 PM
  2. Replies: 26
    Last Post: 09-29-2013, 12:45 AM
  3. Club "Funny Money"- Tolerable or Royal "pita"?
    By minnow in forum Customer Conversation
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 05-28-2013, 08:25 AM
  4. Replies: 6
    Last Post: 01-24-2012, 05:34 PM
  5. The terms "mojo" and "nation sack" in blues music
    By PhaedrusZ in forum Music Mix
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 02-29-2008, 08:00 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •