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Thread: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

  1. #1
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    Default Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    Let me first explain where my two problems have stemmed from. I have a very active imgination. I usually go through atleast 4 and as high as 7 good sized books a week because of this, and prefer it over TV. I can pretty much think of and easily play any scenario in my head, good or bad.

    I'm afraid of the dark. There. I said it. I'm an adult who has been afraid of it her entire life, or for what she can remember. I cannnot sleep in the dark a lone, but 90 percent of the time if i'm sleeping with a friend or BF, I'm fine. But, some nights I wake up and I'm scared no matter who is laying with me. It takes hours to go to sleep after that happens, and the next day I feel like shit from being so tired. I've never heard of another adult having this problem really, so that further hinders me in trying to solve it. I even sometimes have trouble in the movie theatre! I just don't know what to do. It doesn't ruin my life, but it does effect it, and I wish there was some way I could just get over my fear.

    My second problem is with another phobia. Large (like over 10 feet) snakes and crocodiles/alligators. I know silly huh? I've had this my entire life, and it may be even more embarrassing. I respect both of those creatures, and would never want to harm one even if I could get rid of all of them in the world, but jesus do they scare me. It's so bad if I flip through TV or on the net and see a picture, even for a second, of either/or, I will have a mini panic attack and sometimes even cry, depending on the content I saw. I cannot go into pools by myself, as that feeling of open water where something like that could get me is overwhelming. I also cannot go near large body of water, lakes, oceans, or in one at all. Even just passing the reptile house at the zoo and not going in it leaves me breathing funny. I don't even know where the fear came from! I never had a bad experiece with either animal. I just don't know what to do about either, and I would really like to "grow" out of this and move the hell on.

  2. #2
    God/dess scarlett_vancouver's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    Aw. Re: being afraid of the dark...I'm not anymore, but I was for so long that I still sleep with my light on, out of habit. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Fear of the dark is just fear of the unknown, which is totally common and understandable.

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    Featured Member desavirsire's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    Well you say that these both stem from your imagination which causes you to read alot of books it makes me wonder. What kind of books do you read? Maybe if you are reading darker murder mystery kind of books you need to switch to something happier. It might help a little???? Thats all i could think of, hope it gets better for you.

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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    Quote Originally Posted by desavirsire
    Well you say that these both stem from your imagination which causes you to read alot of books it makes me wonder. What kind of books do you read? Maybe if you are reading darker murder mystery kind of books you need to switch to something happier. It might help a little???? Thats all i could think of, hope it gets better for you.
    Nope, nothing scary, believe me I know better haha.

  5. #5
    Chicagoeditor
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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    For me, all my childhood fears--including fear of dark basements--vanished when I hit 30. I distinctly remember being alone in the house (a Victorian) one night during a bad thunderstorm. The power went out and I had to feel my way down to the basement to reset the fusebox. With the lights back on, I suddenly realized that I hadn't been scared AT ALL during the whole event.

    As for the reptile/body of water phobia, there are techiques for slowly introducing these in a way that you gradually get comfortable. Or, if you want a Big Bang-type solution, there's so-called "immersion" therapy, which would call for you jumping into a pond filled with non-poisonous snakes and thereby learning (after, we assume, a great deal of screaming and panic) that these beasties won't harm you.

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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    Quote Originally Posted by Chicagoeditor
    For me, all my childhood fears--including fear of dark basements--vanished when I hit 30. I distinctly remember being alone in the house (a Victorian) one night during a bad thunderstorm. The power went out and I had to feel my way down to the basement to reset the fusebox. With the lights back on, I suddenly realized that I hadn't been scared AT ALL during the whole event.

    As for the reptile/body of water phobia, there are techiques for slowly introducing these in a way that you gradually get comfortable. Or, if you want a Big Bang-type solution, there's so-called "immersion" therapy, which would call for you jumping into a pond filled with non-poisonous snakes and thereby learning (after, we assume, a great deal of screaming and panic) that these beasties won't harm you.
    Ha, well a nice big 25 foot long crocodile might though . I have thought about some sort of deal where I introduce myself to maybe a small alligator or something, but even the thought of it makes me want to puke.

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    Senior Member Ms Angela's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    Well, what you are doing with your reptile phobia is strengthening it.

    By avoiding contents and situations which make you look at and think about reptiles, you are telling your brain that these things should be avoided and are dangerous because you cannot prove it otherwise. You need to introduce this stuff into your daily life. Think about reptiles or buy a plastic snake and have it on your computer. You'll get used to it after a while. After that you should start watching documentaries.

    It's all about confronting your fears!

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    Featured Member cameronfl's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    Everyone has SOMETHING that is irrational. Mine(and I'm the same way as far as imagination and reading!) is dangling my feet ovet the side of a bed, chair, sofa, etc... Even though i know it is completely irrational it is still in the back of my mind that something will grab me from underneath. I can bend down and look under....can even put my hand underneath(if I can see it)..but I always sit with my feet tucked up so the alligator underneath doesnt eat my legs!
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    Featured Member Sinder's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    Don't feel bad about your phobias. We all have something we are afriad of. I will admitt that up until a few years ago, I still slept with my Winnie the Pooh Bear.....are you still embarassed?LOL! It was mainly for security for me...helped me sleep. And I am DEATHLY afraid of spiders, and like you can't even see them on TV or a pictures without wanting to cry and tremble. I though would love to be able to erradicate the species all together....I think they flock to me because I am afraid. THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!! Anyway, sometimes we can outgrow our fears and other times they will stay with us unless we choose to confront our fears in order to realize there isn't any reason to be scared in the first place.....but I'm too scarred to face my fear so I will continue to live with it. I think our fears also give us character that defines us as well. Just my 2 cents....*steps down from soap box*

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    God/dess Deogol's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    You shouldn't be scared OF the dark.

    You should be scared of whats IN the dark.

    Trolls, goblins, demons and ghosts.

    All swirling around your feet
    crawling up your bed posts!

    These are night's laws

    With sharp teeth
    and teasing claws!

    Hiding in dark corners

    sowing your grave's wreath
    and being your scorners!

    You hear them tip toeing around

    A clink here and a clank there
    All making their whispered sounds!

    Beware! Beware!

    Though you cannot see them
    They are certain to be there!

    heh heh heh heh...

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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    ^ Dude, you are so mean! I'm terrified of the dark, too. My boxspring sits on the floor and I'm STILL afraid to let an arm or leg dangle over. I have a nightlight for when I'm sleeping alone (which is most of the time, unfortunately). I'm also afraid of fish. Goldfish aren't bad, but ones I'm not used to seeing or anything over half the size of my fist. I don't know why, it's really weird. Yea, so don't even get me started on sharks.
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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    Quote Originally Posted by Deogol
    You shouldn't be scared OF the dark.

    You should be scared of whats IN the dark.

    Trolls, goblins, demons and ghosts.

    All swirling around your feet
    crawling up your bed posts!

    These are night's laws

    With sharp teeth
    and teasing claws!

    Hiding in dark corners

    sowing your grave's wreath
    and being your scorners!

    You hear them tip toeing around

    A clink here and a clank there
    All making their whispered sounds!

    Beware! Beware!

    Though you cannot see them
    They are certain to be there!

    heh heh heh heh...
    You will get eaten in your sleep, I promise you!

  13. #13
    Veteran Member ChloeTheRed's Avatar
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    Default Re: Help! Embarrassing Problem(s)!

    I'm still afraid of the monsters under things, too! I hate sitting with my bare feet dangling off the couch or anything, something will eat them! (weirdly enough, it's OK if I have thick socks on.)

    If the phobia is interfering with your ability to function, then definitely do something about it (get a couple night lights and experiment with keeping a plushie snake or gator around until it doesn't freak you out when you see it from the corner of your eye.) If it doesn't screw with your everyday life, let it slide. I'm definitely growing out of some of my childhood fears (like the basement monster), but I'm not over it yet (I'm 24). For example, I hate going up narrow stairs from the basement because I can't see what's behind me. Even after I'd gone to college, I couldn't do my laundry after dark, because I would absolutely terrify myself beyond all reason coming back upstairs and would be so amped up that I couldn't even sit down. Now I'm in a creaky old victorian house with narrow stairs down to the laundry in the basement, same as growing up; I can deal with it just fine almost every time, though I do get that chill up my spine pretty frequently on the last few stairs. It seems to be getting better with time, though I imagine I'll be some tough old biddy of 98 and will randomly scare myself to death going up some dark stairs for the millionth time in my life.

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