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Thread: Oh, c'est ma culture!

  1. #1
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    Default Oh, c'est ma culture!

    ...Or whatever the phrase happens to be. My French is bad.

    It's just what I get when I say "NO kissing. NO kisses. Not on the boobs, not on the stomach, NOT on the CHEEK". I don't care if it's 'zee culture'. Bullshit. You don't kiss your car salesman, do you monsieur? I just get so much flak from refusing the customary both cheek kissing thing after the dance. Hard enough to keep mouths off me during the dance. I know it's a relatively accepted thing around here, but I can't handle it. I won't (not unreasonable). Even if it's on my cheek. It's not the family party cheek kissing anyway. They try to make it all wet and gross and pervy (like the 'continental' hand kissing crap they try). Keep the spit to yourself, misters.

    So last night I back away and say "no, sorry, I was raised out west. We don't do that" (a half lie...technically Ottawa is west of Quebec, right? heh).

    That was just a rant I guess. Sometimes I think their being offended by my refusal to allow this stuff is even more offensive to me. Strangely though, by saying that I'm just not used to engaging in kissy culture (like it were my short coming and not their's for being gross) was far less offensive to the guy than my usual (uh, no...why? because I don't like it, that's why).

    So I guess to excuse my complaining as a roundabout reason for writing this- uhm, what are the 'least offensive' ways to personally enforce certain boundaries that are not common? I keep reading many of you on here saying you manage to swing less contact than is the norm in your region, club, or whatever. How on earth do you do this without alienating customers who expect more (as in, the majority of customers)? Like, how do you say 'no' without causing offence (re- without losing dance money)?

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    God/dess scarlett_vancouver's Avatar
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    Default Re: Oh, c'est ma culture!

    Air kisses? Can you get away with that? Like, go through the whole routine, but don't let them get close enough to actually slobber on you? You'd have to be the pace setter...

    It skeeves me out too...and the only people that do that to me are my family! Crazy Quebecers...my family does 3 kisses, what's that about? It's so confusing.

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    God/dess Jenny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Oh, c'est ma culture!

    Well, me I don't mind the cheek kissing (like after the dance, good-bye?) as long as it isn't gross. My way of dealing is just to say "Do you just get spit on me? Eew." and laugh, and make the guy shrug and be deprecating, and then the next time say "Keep the spit off me, okay? Okay? D'accord?"
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    God/dess ExoticEngineer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Oh, c'est ma culture!

    Yuck.

    Uhm....I haven't had this problem, but I feel for ya. Slobbery kisses anywhere on the body would make my skin crawl....

    I swear, I feel like taking a steel wool sponge to my body after work...blech!




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    God/dess cinammonkisses's Avatar
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    Default Re: Oh, c'est ma culture!

    I dont mind cheek kissing. i just put my cheek to their cheek and make a muahhh sound. Everyonce and a while I'll give my regulars a kiss on the cheek. But that is few, far and inbetween.







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    God/dess ExoticEngineer's Avatar
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    Default Re: Oh, c'est ma culture!

    This reminded me of something that happened Thurs night...I'm dancing for this guy who is borderline bothersome....and I'm doing the head between the boobs thing and he sneaks in a kiss.....I start smirking, and pretty soon I'm laughing and I can't stop, He figures out I'm laughing at him, not with him and asks why.

    "Well, I told you not to do that, and I had a good reason too! That guy over there licked between my boobs and it was nasty, but you called me over before I could go clean up...yah, sorry 'bout that."

    These things make me laugh.
    Last edited by ExoticEngineer; 10-14-2006 at 04:17 PM. Reason: I am the Queen of Typos




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    Default Re: Oh, c'est ma culture!

    Are you dancing in ottawa or quebec? If in ottawa then arent all the clubs there advertised as contact? In quebec, the club will advertise whether or not they allow contact. I know you are referring to kisses on the cheek but maybe some customers see that as part of contact.

    If you are working in a club where contact is advertised then maybe the customers are getting the feeling of being duped by false advertisement when you reject their advances. In this case it might be better to work in a club that enforces no contact.

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    Default Re: Oh, c'est ma culture!

    ^^^Yeah, I can't drive to Montreal every weekend to work though. It has nothing to do with advertising. Every club in this region (Ottawa-Gatineau as one region) has contact dances. (For the record, clubs in Ottawa certainly do not advertise contact dancing, since it is against some bylaw apparently. They have signs that say 'no contact', but this is not the actual case for any of those clubs.) This is par for the course- every customer who lives in the region is aware of this, and unless they are from out of town and have never had a dance in this region before, they know the deal. But just because a dance is 'contact' certainly does not imply a free for all. I don't consider men slobbering on me as part of a 'contact' dance, and believe me I'm no prude. Maybe I'm in the minority around here with my "please don't lick my tits" rule, but I'm not the only one, surely. No matter what, they are not getting 'duped' if they know the deal is $20 for a contact dance. A handful of boob is about as contact-y as it gets without completely dipping into prostitution-dom, far as I see it, and any more than that really can't even loosely be called 'dancing' anymore.

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